by Luke Young
“Oh, no… I saw it before when she was on the leg curl machine.”
“What?” Jillian asked.
“She had me spotting her earlier on the leg machine, and everything just sorta popped out—if you know what I mean. Proving that you’re totally right about that not being a proper workout outfit.” Brian glanced out the window to watch Victoria as she headed to the pool. “She’s a real firecracker.”
“She’s a Darren Star production.”
After grinning, he gave her a confused look.
“Darren Star, the creator of Sex and the City.”
His eyes lit up. “Oh, Samantha. Yeah, I’ve seen an episode or two… maybe,” Brian said a little hesitantly.
She chuckled, and then they both watched as Victoria unabashedly slipped the bikini bottoms up her legs and over her ass as she stood near the pool.
Jillian added, “Maybe a little more like Samantha on female Viagra.” They smiled and shared a nod.
“Has she always been like this? I’m not complaining, just curious,” Brian asked.
“Her husband died two years ago. She worshiped him. He was only forty-two, and they had a very active sex life.”
Brian gave her a solemn look and asked hesitantly, “He didn’t, uh, die while they were… doing it, did he?”
“Surprisingly, no,” she said with a slight grin. Her expression sobered as she revealed, “It was a brain tumor. Ever since then, she’s been living life to the fullest. She rarely says no to anything.”
“I’ll bet,” he said. “That’s not a bad philosophy. You never know what could happen.”
They shared another nod and looked at Victoria as she lay in the lounge chair, once again squirting down her bikini with the spray bottle.
“He left her with a lot of life insurance, an unfilled sexual appetite, and a little mad at the world. That’s a dangerous combination.”
When they could both clearly see Victoria’s nipples again, Jillian said, “Now I’ve got to take that from her.” Then she headed to the door.
“Don’t do it on my account,” he said.
When she reached the door, Jillian tossed over her shoulder, “Rob could come home, and he doesn’t need to see those.”
Brian watched her go, disagreeing with her one hundred percent.
17
Brian rushed up to his room and went into the bathroom; he noticed the remnants of Victoria’s lap dance were still slightly visible on his shorts. He pulled them off, took a close look, and then shook his head and smiled as he stood in front of the mirror. When he closed his eyes, he saw visions of Victoria as she bent over before him. He didn’t think about her long but instead started having all these fantasies about Jillian as he stood staring blankly in the mirror. Minutes later, when he finally pulled himself back to reality, he glanced down at his erection, which was fighting to break free from his boxer briefs. Ashamed, he looked up at himself in the mirror. How could he be fantasizing about doing that to his best friend’s mother? He stripped off his clothes and showered, ignoring his massive erection. It would be a cold shower—a really cold one.
After the unfulfilling shower, Brian walked to the window and saw that Jillian and Victoria were still out by the pool. He decided he’d spend the rest of the day in the house rather than go out and risk joining them. Maybe that way he could avoid throwing himself into another potentially embarrassing situation. He felt Victoria was an attractive but dangerous woman who acted as though a giant meteor was four hours from destroying the planet, and she wanted to bang as many guys as she could before impact.
Rob returned from his day trip with Laura just before dinner. She had been arguing with him most of the day about why he chose to bring Brian home with him, since it would undoubtedly lead to Rob and her spending less time together. She had planned to spend most of the week with Rob having sex, but he’d been back more than a day, and they still hadn’t done it once. The trip they took that day was unavoidable, and Rob felt like he couldn’t leave Brian all alone in the house on only his second night in Miami. But Laura demanded that he spend the night with her, especially since it was his birthday. She promised to find an attractive friend for Brian so they could double date, but on such short notice, Laura didn’t have a chance to find someone for that night.
Rob swore to Laura that it would just be the two of them going out that night, but then he thought he had a better idea. Brian could be their designated driver. It would be his birthday gift to Rob. That way, both Rob and Laura could start drinking at dinner, get really drunk at a bar afterward, and they could spend most of the night with Brian while he drove them around the city.
When Rob and Brian picked Laura up, Brian could tell that she was not at all happy to see him in the driver’s seat, and it wasn’t until she downed her third drink at the restaurant that she finally appeared to get over it. While Brian knew that the happy couple hadn’t seen much of each other recently, he didn’t know that it had been almost three months since they’d actually had sex. Out of the corner of his eye, Brian could see that during dessert, Laura began feeling Rob’s crotch under the table. She either didn’t care that he noticed or figured he couldn’t tell. Then after dinner, on the way to the bar, Brian was convinced that she performed a hand job on his friend as they sat huddled next to each other in the back seat. He couldn’t see it, per se, but he could certainly hear it in Rob’s cracking voice as they struggled to make small talk during the ten-minute drive.
Jillian began working on her manuscript around 10:00 p.m., but she couldn’t get the term, “landing strip,” out of her head. In her mind, she flashed back to Victoria’s presentation down there. When she finally shook Victoria’s prepubescent look from her head, she stripped and took a good look at her own neglected area. And while she wasn’t completely out of control, Jillian thought she was probably—at the very least—in need of an update.
When Jillian performed an Internet search for “landing strip” and found that the very first result was not an airport landing strip but a Wikipedia bikini-waxing page, she had to giggle. She marveled that even some of the most innocent phrases are slang for a body part or a sex act and can lead to some very un-kid friendly results. Eventually, though, she found exactly what she was looking for, including explicit pictures, and picked up advice on trimming and shaving that most sensitive of areas. She also viewed a lot of pictures of variations on the landing-strip concept and picked the one she found most appealing.
After collecting all the needed supplies, she took a hot bath and performed her hair design work. When she was done, she was pleased. It felt clean and new, and she felt instantly different, almost as if she were ten years younger. The experience inspired her to write a scene about Dallas spying on Katrina while she gave herself the very same sensual trim job. Jillian wrote for two hours and then lay in bed unable to sleep. After another thirty minutes, she took an Ambien, hoping it would do its usual trick.
At the bar, Rob and Laura drank and hung all over each other, while Brian had a pretty miserable time, fully sober. Brian did down one birthday shot with the horny couple at the bar, but he spent the majority of his time sipping cokes and looking out the window. The bar was mostly empty and contained only a few moderately attractive women who didn’t seem very interested in speaking to Brian. Neither did Rob and Laura, who were busy dry humping in a corner booth. Other than occasionally handing him a twenty and asking for another round, there was no other interaction.
When the couple reached seven drinks each total, three at the restaurant and four at the bar, Brian pulled the plug. When Rob asked for another drink, Brian looked at him. “Why don’t you let me drive you to her place so you two can just do it already?”
Rob looked at Laura, they gave each other a matter-of-fact nod, and the three of them climbed into the car less than two minutes later. The couple returned to the backseat, and Brian couldn’t see either of them in the rearview mirror for the entire trip. They were lying back there, doing who-knows-wh
at, and the sounds they made prompted Brian to crank up the volume on the radio.
Brian remembered the route back to Laura’s, and when he reached her dorm’s parking lot, he simply stopped the car, turned off the radio, and adjusted the mirror to avoid any glimpse of them. He waited, never looking back, while he heard some whispers, rustling, and giggling, and then the car door opening. He watched Rob and Laura zip and button clothing as they stumbled away from the car. A few steps away, Rob turned back to Brian, raising his hands as if to say, “Sorry for putting you through that dude,” and they shared a smile.
As Jillian waited for the Ambien to kick in, the phone rang. It was just after 1:00 a.m. on the East Coast, but her ex-husband, George, was on the West Coast and tended not to be terribly considerate. The conversation started out civil but quickly took a turn. When it did, Jillian carried the phone to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of wine. She drank about half the glass before she started feeling a little lightheaded, remembered taking the Ambien, and firmly pushed the glass out of her reach.
When Brian arrived back at Jillian’s, he found her sitting at the kitchen island talking on the phone, wearing a short, silky robe, a glass of wine nearby. Stepping into the kitchen and realizing that she was in the middle of a heated conversation, he winced, stopping dead in his tracks. She waved back to him like it was no big deal. After grabbing a beer, he headed out to the pool and sat in a lounge chair.
The window was open, and he couldn’t help but overhear Jillian as she said, “I’m not writing you another damn check. If you’ve blown all the money already, that’s your problem.”
Brian took a sip of his beer as Jillian said at full volume, “Okay, why don’t you tell me where all the money is tied up right now…. Oh, now you can’t tell me? Maybe if you hadn’t been performing oral sex on that pool in my girl. I mean, on that girl in my—you know what the hell I’m trying to say. Maybe you’d still be sponging off me, but since you did, the checkbook is now closed.”
Then after a brief silence, he heard what sounded like a cell phone bouncing across a kitchen counter followed by breaking glass. Turning, he stared toward the sliding glass door with his eyes wide, wondering if he should check on her. Before he could act, she appeared at the door, and when their eyes met she brushed the hair from her face and gave him a smile.
She walked unsteadily but managed to make her way to the lounge chair next to him and flopped down onto it. “Did you hear any of that?”
“Maybe I caught a word or two.”
“Did you hear the oral sex in the pool part?” she asked.
“Yeah, sorry.”
“Don’t be,” she said, “You didn’t lick that pussy in the pool did you?”
“I haven’t even been in the pool yet,” he said while noticing how spectacular her legs looked in that short robe.
She giggled. “Did I just say pussy? I’m so embarrassed.” She looked at him with wide eyes.
He nodded and grinned. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Sorry. I took an Ambien and had a half glass of wine before I remembered and, uh, I’m starting to feel a little GRRREAT.”
“Do you need to go to bed?”
“No, I’m fine here. I’m good… Isn’t Miami, like, the best weather on the planet?” Jillian asked.
Brian humored her with half a smile and then took another sip of his beer.
“I really hate that asshole,” she said, as she looked at the pool and then to Brian. “I think I’ve really screwed up my life. It’s halfway over, and I drove George away, and I have nothing to show for being here.”
He scoffed and then collected his thoughts. “You’ve accomplished so much. Look at this house, and Rob… he’s a great guy. Your books are so good. People love your books.”
“Have you read any?” she asked.
“Well, no, but I plan to soon.”
“I hate my books—all that screwing and oral and anal sex. And all the money I make off writing that crap. I should be shot.” She grabbed his sleeve. “Can I tell you a secret?” She started without waiting for an answer, “I write about all those beautiful people having amazing, mind-blowing sex. The penises that never go soft and breasts that are huge and orgasm this and orgasm that… and I’ve never once had any really, really freaking amazing intercourse sex.”
He looked at her, embarrassed. “I, uh, find that incredibly hard to believe. You’re so beautiful.”
“No, it’s absolutely true. But aren’t you sweet?” Jillian said as let go of his sleeve. Placing her hands behind her head, she stretched back, which lifted the robe so that Brian could see nearly all of her white, silky panties. Her eyes were closed as she asked, “Where are Rob and Laura?”
“At her place. They really missed each other… a lot,” Brian said, rolling his eyes.
She nodded with her eyes still shut. “They’re probably doing it. They think I don’t know about them doing it, but I’ve heard them doing it. They’re like animals.”
“Tell me about it. I think they were actually going at it in the back of the car while I drove them to her dorm.”
“No shit,” Jillian said and laughed out loud.
Turning toward her, he swung his legs off the lounger as he contemplated what to do. Her legs really looked good, and those panties were pretty tiny and sexy. Brian enjoyed looking at them—and her, for that matter. But he felt he really should get Jillian into her own bed, and while he was at it, he probably should stop staring directly at the beautiful panties, legs, and thighs of his best friend’s mother.
After stealing one last glance, he breathed in deeply. “I think I’m going to go in.”
Jillian startled, her head bobbing. She opened her eyes slightly, then said, “Okay, I’m just going to sleep out here.” With that, her head slumped back down.
Brian stood next to her chair. “You can’t do that. Let me help you up.” He reached out his hand. She opened her eyes, shook her head groggily, then took his hand and attempted to stand up. She was able to get halfway up before she began to fall, but Brian grabbed her around the waist.
“Thanks,” she said, a little startled.
After Brian lifted her into his arms, she wrapped her own arms around his neck, and her robe rose up, exposing her panties. She looked down at her underwear, grinned, and then looked into his face. “Well it’s only fair.”
Brian opened the patio door with one hand, while she clung to his neck with her eyes closed. He carried her through the door, closed it, and made his way up the stairs as she repeated, “It is only fair.”
He laughed. “What’s only fair?”
Jillian opened her eyes, and they looked at each other with their faces almost touching as she said, “That you see my underwear.”
“Uh, why is that?” he asked.
He reached the top of the stairs, a little winded, and carried her into the bedroom as she said, “You are really, really strong.”
He placed her carefully on her bed and stood next to her, grinning. “Why should I see your underwear? Why is that fair?”
“You’re right. It’s not fair. You should see it without my underwear. Then we would be even-steven.”
Confused, he looked at her as she continued, her eyes heavy, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to see your penis. I feel like such a pervert. Do you think I’m a pervert?” Then she closed her eyes and drifted off.
Her head jerked, and her eyes flew open when he replied, “I really don’t understand. When did you see it, exactly?”
Taking a deep breath, she sat up straight and looked him in the eye as she tried to compose herself. “I kind of came up to your room to see if you wanted any breakfast… the eggs I had ready… You are really hard to wake up. Did I say ‘hard’? Oops, I didn’t mean to say ‘hard.’” She broke into a chuckle.
He smiled at her then covered his mouth as he fought back a laugh.
“Whoa…” She shook her head, leaving her hair crowding her face. After using her hand to brush much of
it away, she pursed her lips and blew out hard to dislodge the last strand that had stuck to her cheek. “Where was I? Oh, I was going to leave the room, really, but the covers were already off, and it was poking right out there like a great big turtle, like it wanted to be set free, you know?”
He nodded like he understood.
Grabbing him by the shirt, she pulled him close. “And you don’t want to know how long it’s been since I’ve seen one, and it’s been even longer since I’ve seen a real one like yours.” She snorted like a pig as she laughed then playfully pushed him away from her.
He smiled at her, even though she pushed him so hard that it nearly knocked him over. She looked around the room to be sure they were alone. He followed her eyes, wondering what the hell she was looking at.
She leaned in close to him. “Between you and me… I may have pulled your sheet down, like, an inch. It’s a good thing, too, since it looked like it was trapped… it looked so uncomfortable in there.”
“Yeah, sometimes it does feel really trapped,” he said, trying to make her feel better.
She grabbed his shirt and pulled him really close to her face. “I want you to know I didn’t touch it, or anything. Victoria wanted me to, but I didn’t.”
“She was there, too?” he asked, a little horrified.
“Oh, no,” she said while shaking her head. “She was on the phone.”
Relief, then confusion, then concern crossed his face. “Oh, okay,” he said. A few questions ran through his mind about why she was on the phone while doing that, but he decided to let them go.
“You kind of had an erection, also,” Jillian said while nodding with her lips pursed, as if she was really impressed.
“Really? I’m so sorry,” he said genuinely.
“Don’t worry about it. I was the one molesting you,” she said, laughing out loud. Still holding his shirt close to her, she stated, “You really have one gorgeous penis. I mean, I’ve only seen a couple, but yours is just beyond perfect.” She stared wide-eyed at him.