by Rose Harper
I laid my phone down on the dresser. I gave him some time to try and return my call. If he didn’t, then I would call again. I began putting my clothes away, thinking about Brad the entire time. I had no idea when the man took up so much space in my thoughts, but it seemed that Brad managed to weasel his way in—again.
It felt like we were back in school when I was with him. He was so intense, playful, and pleasurable. He always saw to my needs above his own. I couldn’t describe the amount of restraint that he showed sometimes. But it awed me. He was the epitome of self-control. It pissed me off sometimes. However, he made up for it later.
After putting my purchases away, I called him again. This time it went straight to voicemail. There was no ringing, no nothing. My brows furrowed in confusion. It was at least ringing a while ago, but now there was nothing. I knew his phone was charged up, it always was. He was very anal about that in school, and with a business now, it was the same. That meant he had known I was calling and intentionally shut his phone off.
Why would he do that?
I needed to talk to someone, because the ideas going through my mind were only hurting me. I couldn’t ask for Alex to step away from my mom; she would know something was up. She would start digging and find out all about Brad and me. I couldn’t have her doing that. I had to make up some guy and start talking that way.
I grabbed my phone and came back downstairs, finding my mother and Alex in the kitchen looking at old photo albums. I hated those things with a passion, but they were my mother’s prized possessions. There were pictures from the time I was born to now. She loved embarrassing me with them when people would come to visit. Alex was no different.
Sitting down at the table next to them, I started picking at my fingers. How was I going to start this conversation? I needed the input on what they would do if they were in my place. I needed the only two women in my life that wouldn’t spout bullshit and just give it to me straight. If I had to make up a man’s name to get that, then so be it.
“Mom. Alex. Can I talk to you all about something?” I addressed them both.
They looked up from the albums, seeing a look of dismay on my face. Immediately pushing the photos away from them they gave me their undivided attention. Alex knew what I was going to talk about, or whom I should say. My mother was the only one completely clueless. But I didn’t let that stop me from pushing forward with it.
“I’m in love,” I admitted, watching my mother’s eyes widen and Alex’s lit up with laughter.
“With whom, dear,” my mother asked?
“His name is … Brett,” I lied.
Alex smirked. “Who is this Brett, Claire?”
“Oh, you met him, Alex. Remember when we had lunch?” I widened my eyes to get her to stop playing around.
She behaved, thank God. “Yes, I remember now. The beef cake. Mmm, his muscles, tattoos, and piercings would get any woman’s engines firing on all cylinders.”
“He sounds absolutely yummy,” my mother piped in.
“Oh, he is definitely something,” I stated dryly, clearing my throat before continuing. “Anyway. Well he has this ex-wife. I do not like her, can’t stand her actually. She seems to know something that I don’t, like she’s clued in on a little secret that no one else knows. Well she has made it very clear what she wants. I’m just afraid she’s going to weasel her way back into his life. Am I just overreacting, or should I be worried?”
We sat in silence, both women taking in what I said. I already knew what Alex would say. She’d say to give him a good fuck and show him what he would be missing. But my mother, on the other hand, that was new territory. She’s never given me advice about men before, so I knew it would take her a minute to process. However, I could see Alex was biting at the bit to have her say.
When she couldn’t take the silence any longer, she spouted off. “I’d fuck him and show him what he’d be missing. You know that’s how I roll, Claire. A good rump will definitely take his mind off her if she were to ever step into the mix again.”
Figures. I swear this woman had no brain-to-mouth filter whatsoever.
“I knew you’d say that, Alex. What about you, Mom? What do you think?”
She rubbed her hands together, in a sign of excitement. Well, that’s not good. “This is surprising; you’ve never asked for my advice before. But I’m glad you did now. First, I would dress as sexy as I could, throw him off his game. If he responds, I’d tease the ever-living shit out of him. When he was all riled and wanton, I’d pull back. Tease him, honey, that’s the way to get a man. That and being honest that is. But I’d flip his lid, butter his toast, flick his rod… Oh, you get the point.”
“Seriously? You’re agreeing with Alex right now?” I never expected that from her. Not in a million years.
She snickered, blushing. “How do you think I landed Henry? I tell you now it wasn’t because I looked all that great on that rainy day. It was because I used my inner whore and worked that bitch into the ground.”
I giggled. “No shit?”
She laughed. “I shit you not; you’re my best turd.”
I literally died laughing when she said that. My mother was a closet whore. Who would have known? Maybe I didn’t know my mom so well after all. Especially if she used her vixen ways to land Henry. We were close, but damn had she changed. I can’t remember a time where my mother wouldn’t cuss, let alone bust out that she was major whore material. No frigging wonder her bed is broken. I thought it had been Henry’s fault, but maybe it had been my mother’s.
“You are a real piece of work,” I laughed out.
“I know, right? Who do you think you got your level of awesome from? Certainly wasn’t your father, that’s for damn sure.”
“On a lighter note. What should I do?”
They sighed. “Get your man, Claire Bear. He’s yours for a reason. That means he wasn’t happy with what he had before,” my mom said, grabbing my hands in hers. “When you land him, don’t let him go.”
Alex echoed her statement. “Ditto.”
Feeling a bit better after our conversation, Alex and I filled my mother in on where her bachelorette party was going to be. Of course, she threw a fit, stating she didn’t want strippers. We had to tell her more than once there were no men allowed at her party. This was strictly for the women in her life and her. After telling her that, she went to her room to begin getting ready. Alex and I ran up the stairs like a couple of school girls getting ready for a date.
Tonight was going to be awesome. We were going to drink to our hearts’ content and play some bride games. Alex called ahead of time to rent out Chuck’s so no one else could be there while we were partying. Albeit reluctantly, Chuck agreed. Well, he agreed when she told him there were going to be around twenty-five women there. All buying drinks. He was on the same page after that.
I came out of the bathroom with a wave of steam. Needing to take a shower had been at the top of my list, especially after my earlier escapade in the dressing room. I didn’t want to go to Chuck’s tonight smelling like sex. None of them would know that it was Brad I was smelling like, but I still couldn’t do it.
It took me close to an hour to get ready. I paired a sloping halter top with a pair of skinny jeans and tall heels. Pulling my hair back into a ponytail, I made my way downstairs to where Alex and my mom were waiting. Upon seeing my mom, I was speechless. My jaw nearly dropped to the floor. No fucking wonder Henry was marrying that.
Chapter Six
“My God, Mom. What are you trying to do, kill everyone with your secret hot body?” I snickered, making my way toward them.
She giggled. “Well this is my last night as a single woman; I’m going to live it up.”
We all started squealing like one of us had gotten a call from the best-looking guy in school. It was amazing to act so carefree. To act like my age once in a while. Alex always says that I act like I’m forty instead of the twenty-eight that I was. She was hilarious like that.
&nbs
p; Alex got a call from Chuck’s saying that everyone was there. Calling a cab, because there was no way we were going to be driving tonight, we set off. Both Alex and my mom kept telling me that I needed to watch how much I drank tonight, because I was a teetotaler. I laughed it off and told them tonight was the night to get plastered.
We made it to Chuck’s about fifteen minutes later. The party was already well on its way to being a big celebration. We were instantly bombarded by woman upon entering—some congratulating my mom; others saying how jealous they were of her. It was nice to see that so many people had shown up for my mother. She was definitely loved. If I didn’t show her enough, this would.
“Shots!” one of the woman yelled.
We made our way to the bar, each taking a shot. Downing it, I let the burn of the whiskey settle into my stomach. This was going to be one hell of a night. As we started dancing and singing to the fast beat music on the radio, a waiter was coming around and refilling our drinks every so often. I glanced over to see my mom jumping and singing like her life depended on it. She was the funniest sight you’ve ever seen.
As it got well into the night, we were all sweating our makeup off, our bodies filled to the brim with alcohol. I was going to send my mother off right into the world of marriage. There was going to be nothing that old bird hadn’t done by the time tonight was over. I sidled up to her, taking my shots, gasping as it burned all the way down. I was starting to feel the effects of the alcohol, but I wasn’t going to let them know that.
“Let’s play a game!” I screamed into the crowd.
When they all yelled in excitement, we settled into a private room. One bottle of whiskey and a shot glass for each of us was sitting on the table. Have you ever played that game ‘Never Have I Ever?’ If not, then it’s the game you need to play. You find out so much shit on someone, plus get drunk at the same time.
Before we filled our glasses, Alex pulled me to the side. “Claire, you’re already fucking wasted, do you really think this game is such a good idea?”
“Hells yeah,” I slurred, pushing past her into the room.
I sat down next to my mom, pouring my drink. Alex looked kind of doubtful, but followed suit. Once the first question was asked, I realized this was going to be a dirty game. I’d never laughed so hard in all my life after women took shots left after right. I had yet to take a shot.
“Never have I ever … been in love,” one of the women spouted off.
My mother and I took a shot. I looked over just in time to see Alex take a shot as well. What the fuck? She’s been in love before. Oh, that little story should be so good. My brows furrowed when I caught her attention. She gave me a shy smile, wiping the whiskey off her lips. We would definitely be getting into this later tonight. It was something that she’s never told me before, and we told each other everything.
“Never have I ever … fucked in a public place,” another woman yelled.
I looked around me, checking to see who all was taking a shot. There was no way that I was going to be going down alone. When my mother put her glass to her lips with a smile, I nearly fell in the floor. Wow, this game was getting fucked up.
“You’ve had sex in public?” I slurred in her ear.
“How do you think you were conceived?” she cackled with laughter.
Well, that wasn’t disgusting at all. It was my turn before too long. But just as I was about to ask my question, big, strong arms wrapped around me. I looked over my shoulder, swaying in the seat as I did to see Brad standing behind me with a wide smile on his face. However, I was pissed off at him for the moment. I didn’t want to see him. My drunken mind made him out to be the enemy. After seeing Cherish today and him not answering my phone calls tonight, he was definitely on my shit list.
I hiccupped and then giggled. “Wha … you … doin’… here?”
“I’ve come to take you home. Alex called and said you needed to go,” he stated matter of fact.
I giggle harder. “I’m not goin’ anywhere with you,” I slurred in his ear.
He stood back looking at me, then glanced over at Alex. Damn traitor. My fuzzy vision settled on her as she shrugged her shoulders. I can’t believe she sold me out to Brad. I mean, damn, I was only trying to come and have a good time, and I was, until he got here. Brad shifting at my side caught my attention, so I turned my gaze to him.
“You are fucking trashed, little girl. You’re coming with me.”
He grabbed my arm, tugging me away. I was slipping and sliding all over the place in my heels. I tried digging them in several times, but it was no use. Brad was stronger and bigger than me. So, the fact he could easily overpower me was a no-brainer.
“Let me go.” I began slapping at his arm.
“Meredith, I’m taking this girl home. She’s completely bombed,” he yelled back to my mom.
With a nod of her head, I was personally hand delivered on a platter to the devil himself. It didn’t matter if I was having a good time or not, Brad just always had to be the party pooper. I sighed and quit fighting him. He held onto me as we left the bar. My last few hours with my mother were ruined because of him. But the thought of being in the same car as him after he wouldn’t answer my phone call today, nor call me back, sobered me up really quickly.
He put me in his truck, buckling the seat belt. Coming around the car, he opened the door and got in, and that’s when I let it fly.
“Why didn’t you call me back?” I blurted, still slightly slurring my words.
He shrugged his shoulders. “I didn’t know you called.”
I saw red. That lying bastard.
“Oh bullshit. You knew I called you. I want to know why you didn’t answer,” I shot out.
“Claire, Jesus H. What the hell is up? You’re acting all crazy,” he said, starting the truck and putting it into drive.
“I’m not acting crazy at all. I called and it rang and rang and rang. Then I called again and it went straight to voicemail.”
He sighed. “I was dealing with some stuff. That’s all.”
“Dealing with what?”
“Claire, don’t start.”
“Don’t start what?”
“Just leave it be, Claire.” His voice took on a rough edge of anger.
I scowled. “No. Hell, no. I want to know.”
“Claire, back down,” he blazed.
“Fuck. No.” My anger was overtaking any sense I had in that moment.
His anger hit a boiling point. “Claire, back the fuck off! I’m not going to tell you. It’s my business; not yours! Get the fuck over it! I’m not going to tell you everything just because I’m fucking you! We’re not even fucking together,” he hissed.
I sucked in a sharp breath, my anger completely replaced by sadness. “Fine,” my voice getting choked up.
We pulled up to the house, and I immediately jumped out. If I wasn’t sober before, I was stone-cold sober now. Hearing him say that we weren’t together was the fucking straw that broke the camel’s back. I knew we had only been reunited for a couple of days now. But damn, if I was giving myself to him, then I thought we were together. I wouldn’t just give myself to anyone, more so in the way he’s taken me this weekend.
“Claire wait!” he yelled, getting out of his truck.
The tears were threatening to break loose. I had to get into the house and away from him, so I could cry in peace. This was a shitty way to end such a good day. I got to the front door, rummaging through my purse. My purse fell to the ground as I was trying to go through it. I cursed, bending over and picking it up and scooping all my things back into it. Putting my key into the lock, I felt his hand snag my wrist.
I jerked from his hold, rounding on him with all the fury I could conjure. “Just leave me alone, Brad. Please. Just go home, I’ll see you tomorrow. There is no reason for us to speak tonight. No reason at all. I know how you feel about us. For the first time in my life, I know the truth. Now please go,” I whispered, sorrow raking through me.
He blew out a long breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You don’t get it, do you? I love you more than life itself; that’s why I cannot tell you about tonight. Just fucking trust me on this. You do not want or need to know where I was.”
Inhaling a shaky breath, I let a solitary tear fall. “Fine. Goodnight.”
I unlocked the door and slammed it in his face. The tears were automatic with the sound of the door closing between us. I wanted to be with him more than life itself. But if he was not honest with me, there was no way that we could be. I needed someone that was going to tell me these things, to trust me in making my own decisions. I didn’t need someone making my decisions for me. That had happened to me for most of my life; I didn’t need it anymore.
I flopped on the couch, closing my eyes. The last thing I remember was his truck starting, tires screeching out of the drive. When did life become so messed up? Where I couldn’t even make my own decisions anymore, but instead let others around me make them. I thought by telling him that I was not the same person back then, that now I made my own decisions and spoke for myself would make a difference. But it didn’t.
Probably never would.
Chapter Seven
I woke up the next morning with a hangover from hell. It was still early, and Mom and Alex were still in bed, probably sleeping off the night of fun they had. I decided to rouse myself, take some Tylenol and go for a run. Having foregone it yesterday, I really needed it this morning. My head was in no shape to stay unoccupied. I cursed the clock when I saw the time. It wasn’t early like it always was when I went running, but it would have to do.
After getting dressed, I headed out. Plugging my ears with my earbuds I turned up my song. Singing along with each song as my feet pounded the pavement. As the words reverberated through my mind, I found this song described me. There was no wonder I loved it so much. I was about to cross the street when I saw Brad running right toward the intersection. I cursed, stopping in my tracks to run back the other way.