Shalia's Diary Omnibus

by Tracy St. John

  “Yeah, I was. They got me out though.”

  “Thank God. Was anyone else hurt?”

  “Shalia was the only person there,” Dusa said impatiently. “I’m taking her to Medical.”

  “I’m okay,” I reassured Matt, who looked ready to fuss over me. “They just want to make sure.”

  “Of course, of course. I’ll check on you later. Thank God you weren’t killed!”

  He hurried towards the Kalquorians gathered around the blast site. It was nice to see him so concerned.

  I checked out as healthy, of course. Dad was embarrassingly thorough in the examination, insisting on deep tissue contact scans to reassure himself I remained in one piece. Weln showed up to hover too. Candy came running in, screaming my name at the top of her lungs. Even after we told her I was perfectly fine, she carried on in near hysterics until Dad threatened to sedate her for a week. Now she’s insisting I move in with her until we leave for Kalquor.

  Last night was spent in Dusa’s quarters. To top off an already messed-up day, we found out he and Esak will be leaving in three days. Weln’s transfer has not been verified, though Dusa refused to let anybody worry over it.

  “Shalia is alive. We will be happy because of that. Nothing else is important,” he announced to his clanmates. They nodded in agreement, though Weln looked a little lost. I don’t blame him. I’m glad to be alive, but I don’t look forward to losing my boys.

  I can’t write anymore about this now. It hurts too much.

  November 2

  If Candy is the ‘Bluebird of Happiness’ then I suppose I could be characterized as the ‘Crow of Despair’. She did her best to lift my spirits yesterday, but I’m afraid I’m weighted down to earth.

  I had spent the night before with the boys. They pulled a bed in from an unused dorm room and slid it up against the one they already had. It created enough space for all four of us to share. They made love to me very carefully, very gently. They acted as if they were afraid I’d break apart despite the clean bill of health from my shaken dad. That was fine. I felt emotionally fragile. I knew the strong bodies surrounding mine were not real protection, not against people determined to kill, but I hid in the fantasy anyway.

  Morning came too soon. Dusa and Esak starting working on packing to go to Atlanta. I couldn’t handle listening to their plans or watching them prepare to leave. On top of the explosion, it was too much.

  I came up with the excuse that I wanted to borrow clean clothes from Candy. Despite my ever-present Nobek guard, Weln accompanied me to her dorm building. Maybe he couldn’t stand to watch his clanmates pack either. He left me with Candy, mumbling something about checking in with the daycare bunch though he’s been given time off due to clanning and his clanmates leaving.

  Candy acted thrilled to see me. “Get in here! You know what? I’m going to run you a nice, hot bath. You’ll soak and relax. I’ll trim your hair...look at those split ends! Oh, I’m going to do your nails too. When you look good, you feel good, that’s what I say.”

  I stood in the middle of her room, similar to the one I’d had until bad people decided to fire rockets at it. I cried. I cried and cried and cried. Candy crooned to me, hugging me and patting my back. “It will be okay,” she reassured me over and over.

  I finished crying when I ran out of the energy. Empty and tired, I let Candy take care of me. I was a life-size doll for her to play with. True to her word, she ran me a bath. I was at least allowed to wash myself, but the rest was all Candy. She trimmed my hair, styled it nicely, filed and buffed my fingernails and toenails, put a touch of makeup on me, and found pair of trousers and a blouse that fit rather well. Through it all, she kept up her bright chatter, determined to keep me from moping too hard. Little by little I recovered, though the deeper sadness remains.

  She sent me out to have lunch with Mom. Dusa, Esak, and Weln joined us, and we spent much of the afternoon there. Mom made knitting motions with her good hand, and I reminded her she needed both hands to knit. It’s just as well that she can’t. All her yarn was lost in the building collapse.

  I spent last night with the boys again. This morning, Weln decided we needed to go on a nice picnic. He and Dusa have gone to the kitchen to get the makings of that, while Esak has a checkup in Medical.

  Dusa and Esak leave tomorrow. I am fighting with all I have to not waste today in tears. I insist on enjoying every last moment we have left. Crying will no doubt come, but it will have to wait.

  November 4

  They’re gone. Dusa and Esak left yesterday, early in the morning.

  The night before, we received some long overdue positive news. Weln won approval to join his Dramok and Nobek at their new site outside the remains of Atlanta. He also got the okay to stay here until Mom and I leave for Kalquor. That was a little something to celebrate. We did so in our usual fashion. We had sex.

  Animal sex. Desperate sex. I owe Candy an outfit, because Dusa ripped the one she loaned to me into confetti before picking me up and pinning me against the wall. “Pull this damned formsuit off me,” he snarled at the other two men before plastering his mouth against mine. I could barely breathe from the force of his kiss. Meanwhile, Esak and Weln worked to strip his uniform off so that his burning hot body moved against mine. His boots kept them from stripping him entirely, leaving everything hanging from the knees down.

  He shoved his cocks at my pussy and ass, rams storming the palace gates. I opened to him, crying out at the harsh invasion but wanting it as desperately as he needed to give it to me. It seemed right that it should hurt, since losing him and Esak hurt. Dusa thrust deep into me with a single strong plunge, skewering me so that I screamed.

  He pounded into me so that I thudded against the wall. I wrapped my legs around his hips, squeezing tight in rhythm with his thrusts, making him go as deep within me as I could. I yelled with each powerful claiming. I clawed at his shoulders and back. I bit his lips. He growled like a vicious beast, his upper lip curling to show fangs. He crushed against me, forcing me to take him deep. His groin ground against mine, sending devouring pleasure through my clit.

  His thrusts shoved the tip of his cock against my cervix. The sensation erased the line between pain and pleasure. Dusa held me a willing captive, his dark eyes riveted on my face as he took what he wanted. My head tossed from side to side as heaviness bloomed in my gut, a need demanding it be born from my womb. The orgasm came with monumental force, blasting through my loins and up through my chest, throat, and head. It annihilated me. I only knew Dusa climaxed when I returned to reality to feel his cocks pulsing hugely, pouring him into me. His groans bled into each other, shivering my eardrums.

  He let me fall to the floor, though he kept me from hitting hard. I slid down between the wall and him, the friction of our contact settling me as gently to the carpet as a mother laying a baby in its crib. Dusa stepped back, his primary cock still dripping, and Esak stepped forward.

  The Nobek looked the most primal I’d ever seen him, what with those scars livid on his now-fuzzy scalp. Instinctual terror lit in my stomach to watch him coming for me. It aroused me once more. I offered no protest when he grabbed me by the hair and tugged me from the wall. There was no violence in how he made me crawl across the floor, only a firm, uncompromising grip and insistent pull. I followed his direction on hands and knees, eager to discover what he had in store for me.

  Once I’d moved to where there was enough room, Esak got behind me, keeping a handful of my hair. He knelt between my legs, pushing them far apart with his knees. I shivered as the larger of his cocks settled on the bud of my anus. He pressed in until the smaller penis just did enter my vagina. Esak’s free hand went to my shoulder. He gripped it tight.

  I forced myself to relax and open to him, knowing what would happen next. I welcomed it.

  Esak thrust his hips forward, pulling on my shoulder and hair at the same time. All the breath left my body as he buried himself to the hilt with one shove. Orgasmic pain billowed through me. Yo
u read that right. The pain hurt so good I almost climaxed.

  Esak didn’t let up for an instant. His groin slapped loudly against my ass, and he grunted with each thrust. I had no choice but to take it, my staccato yelps adding to the din. We were beasts in the wild, the female mounted by the prevailing male, forced to absorb his eager instinct to breed. We were primal animals, guided only by natural impulse. There was nothing but the basest urges left to us, the whole thin veneer of our humanity gone.

  At some point Esak leaned over me. He took a mouthful of the back of my neck and bit down, a tomcat taking the female in heat. He growled. The vibration of it shivered down my spine, making me raise my hips higher, inviting him deeper inside. Both his hands clutched my hips, driving me onto him. I might carry the bruises of his fingers for weeks. I will be sad when they fade.

  He plunged deep over and over. I clawed the floor and screamed breathlessly as my body fought for the sanctuary of climax. At last it closed over me in a maelstrom of stormy sensation, sweeping me far and wide. Pulsing, pounding, and quaking, I fell into the abyss with the sound of Esak’s howl following me down.

  The warm weight of my adored Nobek fell over me as our spasms faded. His arms closed about my upper body, simultaneously claiming and sheltering me for the last moments we had. His chest heaved against my back as he regained his breath. We rested for a bit, loathe to separate too soon.

  At last Esak stirred, lifting off me with obvious reluctance. It was Dusa who picked me up and placed me on the bed. He slid next to me and Esak joined us, lying on the opposite side of me.

  As if rehearsed, each man grasped a wrist and pinned my arms over my head. Then they gripped the bends of my knees and drew them up and out, opening me wide for the waiting Weln.

  The Imdiko crawled up so that he kneeled between my splayed thighs. My breath caught at the position I was in: I felt as if Dusa and Esak offered me to some pagan god, a sacrifice to a great and terrible deity. That was how Weln looked at that moment.

  Where was the gentle, sweet Imdiko I thought I knew? Waiting for his turn and watching his clanmates with me had made his face primitive with brute lust. Maybe it was the angst of knowing this was our final night together as a foursome that turned him fierce. Whatever it was, there was nothing kind in Weln’s expression. All I saw was feral need.

  I trembled in the unmoving grasp of Dusa and Esak, waiting for Weln to claim his victim.

  His naked body shook all over, as if he restrained some violent urge. The barest sliver of blue-purple irises showed around his wide-pupil stare. He crept over me, as sinuous as a snake. His mouth opened, and fangs descended.

  I moaned a noise of doomed acquiescence. Weln grabbed my hair and used it to pull my face to once side, exposing the side of my throat. The rough rasp of his tongue scraped along the thick side muscle of my neck; a taste before the kill. Then he bit.

  I whimpered, though the pain ended in an instant. As he injected me with his toxin, he positioned his cocks to fill me. However, he didn’t enter instantly. Instead, he held me still. As the venom flowed, all sorrow and fear whirled away under the tide of euphoria. My thoughts lightened, and I was newly aroused.

  Weln slid his fangs free and rose over me. The expression etched in his dark face was that of a dangerous predator, but instead of terror I knew only desire. I arched, offering my throat again to him.

  He circled it with one hand. He didn’t choke or hurt me. He only displayed his dominance in no uncertain terms. The other hand clutched a breast, squeezing just shy of pain. I nearly purred with the sensual excitement of it.

  Weln entered me. Unlike the near desperation of the way Dusa and Esak had taken me, he went slow. Not slow as in being careful, but slow as if to make me aware I was under his utter control. His words reflected that assumption:

  “Feel me moving inside you. Feel how I possess you. You will yield to me. You have no choice but to accept this.”

  My pussy flexed in response to the demanding tone. Intuiting his power over me, I went softer and more accepting than ever. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Dusa bite his lip. I thought he might be getting aroused again. Esak nodded in approval.

  Deeper and deeper, Weln filled me. My helpless body offered no resistance. I could detect every single inch of his cocks as they parted my flesh, opening me to his demands. He pinched my nipple and I squirmed a little as a bolt of heat shot from it directly to my clit. I felt no urge to escape, however. I was his. I belonged to him, to all three of them. I would not deny them their rights to me.

  Weln arrived at the end of me, the contact between the tip of his cock and my cervix sending daggers of painful ecstasy through my belly. I cried out.

  “Who is your master, Shalia?” Weln asked.

  “You,” I moaned.

  “Do you give this body to me to use as I see fit?”

  “Yes.” The word came out in a groan.

  “Then to whom does this belong?”

  “You.”

  “What will you deny me of yourself?”

  “Nothing.” I was adamant about that.

  Weln’s smile made him savagely beautiful. “I accept this gift of you. You will lie still and quiet for my pleasure.”

  He fucked me, dragging his cocks outward with methodical sadism before pushing in as gradually. He released my breast to draw lazy circles around my clit, teasing it unmercifully, making it blossom into red, swollen eagerness. He refused to touch the burgeoning tip, and the slow penetration and withdrawal excited me without allowing orgasm. He watched my face all the while, a rather cruel expression darkening his.

  Weln forced me to take this crawling pace for what felt like eons. I was suspended, too aroused to be comfortable. My every thought was eclipsed by the soaring need to be taken faster and harder until I could come. The unrelenting pressure didn’t grow or recede, but remained at a steady throb. After long enough, it was more torture than pleasure.

  I wanted to beg for mercy. I wanted to move against him, to bring my hips to his with quickness, with force. Yet even if the other two hadn’t been holding me, I’d given myself to him, to with as he wished. It wasn’t my place to demand anything.

  I settled for tiny pleading whimpers, sounds I thought Weln would not identify as being anything but what I could not help. I hoped he would understand how desperately I needed him to give me release.

  “Who knew how brutal gentle lovemaking could be?” Esak grinned. “You are a vicious bastard, my Imdiko.”

  “I’d advise you not to forget that,” Weln smirked in return. “Consider this your one and only warning.”

  Dusa laughed evilly, and Esak looked at the two men with mingled threat and delight. Meanwhile, I was left to endure the painstaking fucking the Imdiko delivered.

  He pressed deep inside and held there for a moment. Then he ground against me in circles, sending deep, demanding pleasure into my clit. I bit my lips together and moaned before I could stop the sound. The effort to remain still and silent brought tears to my eyes. I needed to come so bad.

  “Lie there and take it,” Weln demanded. His hips slid back, emptying me halfway before slamming against me once more. He ground against me with deliberate force.

  I shook all over, tension making demand worse. Desperation doubled, then tripled when Weln drove against me again and worked his lower body in circles against mine. My mouth flew open, and I cried out. Heady arousal spiked deep in my gut, ripping control from my grasp.

  “No escape, my little Shalia,” Weln snarled. His groin crashed and crushed against mine. I wailed again at the insane heat that erupted. I wasn’t just shaking now; I jerked as if in the throes of a seizure. Even Dusa and Esak couldn’t hold me motionless.

  “You can’t get away.” Thrusting. Grinding. “Mine to fuck all night long if I wish it.” Thrusting. Grinding. Thrusting. Grinding. “You have no choice but to accept my desires.” Thrusting. Grinding.

  I sobbed, wailing as he tormented me with monstrous pleasure. I voiced inarticula
te pleas, spoken language having deserted me. Weln moved faster and harder, as I’d hoped, but the ecstasy was ferocious, ripping at me with erotic savagery.

  Orgasm roared through me. A ravening, cruel eruption tore through my insides, shredding my womb, belly, chest, throat, and mind. I think I screamed. All I could see was the fierce face over mine, and all I could feel was my guts being consumed in a firestorm of elation.

  My pussy contorted with the force of the orgasm, drawing on the invader that punished it into almost hellish rapture. Weln jerked against me, as if trying to escape. I had him, capturing him as he’d captured me, forcing his bliss out in a thick, boiling stream. His body bowed backwards as he discovered his plight too late, that he was the one who would offer sacrifice. He yelled as I emptied him.

  We were exhausted after that, but none of us slept. With the next dawn taking Dusa and Esak from me, every moment was precious. We talked, we cuddled, we did all we could to pack in as much joy as we could in our last hours together. There wasn’t enough time. Is there ever?