Shalia's Diary Omnibus

by Tracy St. John

  My spirits lifted to see Oses clad only in shorts, his magnificent body making my mouth dry. I might have tried for a different kind of workout (yes, sex) despite all the pain I was in if Candy and Katrina hadn’t been there. Instead I lined up with my friends before the Nobek and awaited his instructions.

  “Head assault. Defend!” he barked at us. We immediately crouched down, our arms flying up in x formations before our faces.

  “Lower, Candy. Faster, Katrina. Shalia, that was sloppy and slow. Up straight. Lower body assault. Defend!”

  Again we moved, more or less in unison. I was sluggish, and my legs damned near tangled around each other as I jerked to the side, moving to present less of a target to my imaginary attacker.

  “Second warning, Katrina. Speed it up. Blade your body more, Candy. Shalia, wake up or get the fuck out of my class.”

  After my latest row with Resan, my fuse was short. “Hey, back off already. We just trained with the other jerk for the past hour and then some. I can barely walk for the exhaustion and pain. You should be glad I’m on my feet at all!”

  Oses froze. I’ve never seen that man stare at me so coldly. I knew I’d gone too far as far as our student/teacher relationship was concerned. I held up my hands.

  “I’m sorry, Nobek. I beg your pardon for my disrespect. It won’t happen again.”

  “No it won’t, Matara. Nor will this half-assed display you’ve shown me these last three days.” His voice was quiet, but there was a deadly undercurrent to it. The tone made me listen more closely than if he’d screamed at me.

  Oses stood in front of me, his hands on his hips. “You asked for this. You begged for this in your daughter’s name. You promised to do the practice, no matter how difficult. What have you done since we’ve granted you the opportunity? The bare minimum of effort, with unending complaints and excuses.”

  I cringed, feeling small and ashamed. I swear I had started off with noble intentions. However, my dislike for Resan and the fact that everything was tons more difficult than I’d anticipated had taken out a great deal of my enthusiasm. I did what I had to in order to get by, nothing more.

  Oses’s verbal spanking continued. “I don’t care that you’re tired. I don’t care that you’re hurting as long as Dr. Tep says you’re fine to continue. Commit to this or quit. All or nothing. Either way, you’ll stop wasting the time I and Dramok Resan spend on you. Decide, because the next instance you give me shit, whether through performance or running your mouth, I’m throwing you out. There’ll be no second chances.”

  He wasn’t kidding. I got with the program or Oses would wash his hands of teaching me.

  We had an agreement to leave our student/teacher relationship at the room’s door. Yet I had little doubt that if I failed in this, I would be diminished in Oses’s eyes as his lover and friend.

  I swallowed. “I’ll work to the utmost of my abilities. I apologize for my poor attitude, Weapons Commander.”

  “Then move into position. Mid-section assault. Defend!”

  I put in real effort for the rest of the lesson. It hurt like a thousand hells, yet I gave it everything I had. I won no praise, but Oses didn’t kick me out. When the lesson was over, after he dismissed Candy and Katrina, he ordered me to present myself for a spanking. I knew it wasn’t because he wanted to have fun.

  Oses didn’t have to tell me what the punishment was for. I knew. I had been disrespectful to the extreme before my fellow students. I was just grateful that he waited to discipline me, rather than in the presence of the others.

  I’d asked to be instructed as if I were a Nobek. That meant taking my medicine like one. That meant physical punishment.

  I took the licks any Nobek trainee would accept discipline from his superiors. I probably yelled a lot louder than a Nobek would, but I accepted it. Oses looked kind of proud of me afterward.

  “Remember that this stays in this room,” he reminded me. “Do not bring it into our lives outside of here.”

  “Yes, Weapons Commander.” I’m not sure how I’m supposed to not acknowledge my blistered ass when we have dinner with Betra tonight though. I may not be able to sit for a week.

  Fuck. Tomorrow is leg day with Resan too. I am going to be in such agony.

  August 17

  Holy smokes, has it been a week since I recorded an entry? Apparently so. I’ve been a busy girl.

  When I’m not exercising, I’m with Anrel. She has transitioned to a regular environment as of yesterday. I’m so excited! She’ll soon be sleeping in my quarters, a normal baby living with her mommy. Tep thinks it’ll be four or five more days while he runs final tests and makes sure she’s acclimatized to our dirty, germy atmosphere. Candy’s boyfriend Ama used some scraps from the bar he built for our dance club to make Anrel a beautiful crib to sleep in. Katrina and Candy sewed some sheets that fit from the standard sleeping mat linens the ship uses.

  Speaking of our dance club, it is finally ready to open. Just a few tiny details, and we’ll have our party space. It’s rather late – we’re around six weeks or so from Kalquor, so we’ll enjoy little use out of it. Oh well. We’re making a big to do of it anyhow. Our opening party is in three days.

  So much to celebrate. I am delighted to report that there have been no more threats from Oses to kick me out. No more spankings for screwing up either. I have been working hard ever since I embarrassed myself last week with my ‘poor me’ bitchfest during which I talked back to Oses. I’ve toed the line with Resan too, doing everything he demands. Oh, I continue to trade rude words with the man – we’ll never be friends. But I am growing stronger, putting some muscle on, losing the baby belly, and increasing endurance.

  Not that I’m about to show any gratitude, not after this morning. Resan said he couldn’t understand how I’d ended up pregnant with Anrel, because no Kalquorian with sense would fuck such a useless scrap of an Earther. I told him I’d be glad to tell the weapons commander that Resan thought he had no sense. Resan believed Oses only screwed me out of pity. His lip curled in outright disgust as he looked at me heaving for breath after jogging a quarter of a mile down the ship’s corridors.

  “I knew it! You despise me!” I shouted with triumph. “Telling everybody you didn’t care one way or another was bullshit. You absolutely hate me!”

  Resan stared at me for a few moments before realization dawned. “You’re right. I loathe you. I do. I don’t know why.”

  “The feeling is mutual. I think I detested you from the moment we met.”

  Look at us. We found something in common: a deep and abiding abhorrence for each other. It’s the sole thing I feel comfortable sharing with that bastard. Hey, there’s love at first sight, right? Why not hate? Some people were destined to be the sand in a gal’s ass crack.

  With that knowledge, I realize I’ll never get whatever incentive it was that Oses and Betra had in mind for me if I did well for two weeks. I’d screwed that up already in the first couple of sessions when I smarted off to Oses. With Resan’s immense dislike of all things Shalia, he’ll never give a good report of my progress. I’m screwed.

  It’s still worth my while to do my best. I have my head on straight again, re-committed to doing the utmost for Anrel’s security. Not only that, but I discovered how averse I am to disappointing Oses.

  I didn’t disappoint this afternoon. We had sparring matches in both blades and self-defense to demonstrate how thoroughly we’d absorbed our lessons thus far. I actually won a “Excellent job, Shalia,” from Nobek Idow after I managed to deflect all his attacks.

  As far as hand-to-hand, Oses put me in indefensible positions three times. Five was the limit he allowed us before we move on to new techniques. Katrina matched me, and Candy scraped by with five. She passed muster, but she’s pretty mad at herself for a couple of admittedly silly mistakes.

  Two out of three classes are going suitably. I can’t complain, so I won’t. I’ve done enough of that. I’m ready to kick butt. Maybe someday I’ll do so. Resan will b
e at the front of the line.

  A girl can dream.

  August 19

  I had no idea what was going on last night an hour after dinner when Oses and Betra showed up at my door. We’d woken up together in my bed that morning, but I hadn’t talked to them after we all went our separate ways. Even instruction with Oses was cancelled because of his duties; however, he did warn Candy, Katrina, and me we’d be fools not to practice without him. He promised pain if we were not ready for our next lesson.

  It had been a full but satisfying day. I had breakfast with the gals in the dining room. Then it was on to spend a couple of hours with Anrel. If her condition continues to improve, she’ll be out of Medical in a couple of days. I get to bring my baby home! At least, my home aboard the ship. She’s alert, looking at people and responding to us. I can see her developing before my eyes. It’s amazing.

  After visiting Anrel, I had training with my least favorite ass in the universe. Resan did all he could to piss me off while we sweated. Now that he realizes he does dislike me, he seems to take great delight in it. For my part, I worked hard with no hope of any consideration for it. I yelled back when the mood suited me. We’ve achieved a sort of comfort in our mutual condemnation society. In some perverse fashion, I think we both enjoy having a person we can dump on openly and impolitely. It amuses Candy and Katrina to no end.

  Then we had our knife fighting class, which went pretty well. I enjoyed it. Idow relies on Larten’s lesson plan, altering it for each of us as our needs and skill levels dictate. Then there was lunch, then we practiced defensive techniques so Oses wouldn’t kick our asses later.

  After a nice shower I spent more time with Anrel. We had visitors, including Nobek Siko. I suspect Captain Wotref’s clanmate was hoping to run into Katrina.

  “She’s napping after our workout,” I explained to the elder Nobek as he cradled Anrel in his scarred arms. “Katrina says training wipes out her old lady body.”

  Siko snickered. “That woman is more fit than some of the girls your age.” When Anrel chirruped at him, he smiled at her. “Yes, my little becu. Grammy is stubborn. She makes this Nobek hurt as no weapon ever has. She is still the most wondrous being, next to you.”

  I felt sorry for him, for all of Clan Wotref. “She misses you too. It’s killing her to have to choose.”

  “She should not have to. Her son is in the wrong.” Siko scowled only slightly, as if afraid to upset Anrel.

  “I agree, but he probably thinks he’s doing it out of love. He’s trying to save her soul.”

  “He’s an idiot.” Siko stated this flatly. “Don’t tell her I said that.” He smiled at Anrel. “As for you, precious becu, I’ll put kisses on your cheeks where Grammy does. Then when she kisses you there, you’ll deliver them for me.”

  I hope things pan out for Katrina to be with Clan Wotref. When an old brute such as Siko does something so romantic, it has to happen.

  After Anrel went down for a nap, I returned to my quarters. I’m ready for her arrival. The crib is by the sleeping mat, and her itty bitty clothes (so cute!!!) are in drawers and hanging up. A basin for her bath is next to the shower. Formula, bottles, a ton of necessities litter the shelves. Piles of diapers lined up against the walls since I ran out of drawer and shelf space. Who would have ever thought such a tiny being would need so much room? At this rate, she’ll need her own quarters.

  I drifted around, looking at her stuff, envisioning Anrel being there with me. I can’t wait.

  Dinner came and went. I checked on my little girl. Still all systems go. Tep decided to run a scan and some quick tests on me to see how I’m doing.

  “You look great,” he confirmed. “Those workouts are getting you in fantastic shape.”

  “I’ve barely started,” I laughed.

  “The difference is there. I’m calling you fully recovered from the It and the poisoning it took to knock that thing out of you. Keep it up.”

  I was in a happy mood when I went back to my quarters. I’d barely stepped in when my door opened and Oses and Betra walked in.

  “Hi guys. It looks as if you’ve done some shopping.” I grinned at them because they were carrying small boxes, the kind that Acquisitions uses. “Anything for me?”

  “It’s all for you.” Betra’s smile stretched ear to ear, full of mischief. “It’s part of your reward.”

  “What reward?” I gave the boxes a worried look.

  “For doing so well with your training,” Oses replied, setting his load on the table. “It’s a day or two early, but we figured you earned it.”

  “An advance on continued good behavior,” Betra added. His boxes landed on my lounger.

  I hated to refuse treats, but my conscience is such a bitch. “I’m more than a few days from earning any such thing,” I pointed out. “My butt was spanked for being a disrespectful whiner. Resan would never in a million years admit I did anything right. No way I earned anything.”

  Betra gave me an amused look. “I’d hate to see you and Resan locked together in a small room. The carnage would be insane.”

  Oses shook his head. “He doesn’t like you, not a bit. But as I keep telling you, he’s fair. It was obvious Resan was choking on every word when he reported to me, but he admitted that since that rocky start, you’ve applied yourself. His exact words were, ‘When she shuts that loud mouth of hers, she works hard. Shalia is exceeding my expectations.’”

  My eyes were wide enough to fall out of my head. “Resan said that about me? Resan? Tell me you recorded that moment. I would give anything to hear praise for me coming out of his mouth.”

  Oses and Betra both laughed. The Nobek told me, “No, I did not record it. I’m not giving you any ammunition when it relates to your feud.”

  Betra added, “It’s so weird how you can’t stand each other. In a lot of respects, your personalities are similar.”

  “You take that back,” I snarled at the Imdiko.

  Oses interrupted my flare of temper. “You did mess up at the start, both with your lazy attitude and mouthing off to me. Since then you have – what’s the phrase? Pulled your shit together. I am proud of you.”

  Wow. Hearing that from Oses was on par with getting a ticker tape parade. I almost wriggled in my delight to hear him praise my efforts.

  Betra smiled at my beam. “You deserve an early surprise. We wish to keep you motivated to continue. It’s wonderful that you’re not just recovering, but coming back stronger than ever.”

  I think I blushed. Their approval left me feeling as if I’d conquered a mountain.

  Betra opened the first box. At first, I thought he was presenting me with a dead animal. “I hope you know how to put this on.”

  After a horrified moment, I realized it was a wig. The hair color was far from mine and had long, loose, spiraling curls. “What, you don’t like my real hair?” I asked, mystified by the gift.

  “We’re heading somewhere special,” Oses grinned. “You’ll be in disguise.”

  “Oh.” I had no clue what was happening, but the adventure sounded exciting. “Is what we’re doing legal?”

  “That remains to be seen,” Betra laughed. “Can you figure out how to wear this thing?”

  I did so, noting the texture of the wig was nothing resembling my own. I already appeared unlike myself after I’d managed to hide my hair beneath it. “Cool. People will have to check twice before they realize it’s me.”

  “Play with your makeup some too. You’ll be wearing a disguise, but let’s make you as incognito as we can.”

  “A disguise?” Boy, this was better by the second. “Are we going to a costume ball?”

  Oses snickered. “You could say balls are involved.”

  “Oh, we’re having a sex escapade then. A sex-capade.” I snickered and pulled my cosmetics out.

  I’ve worn heavy makeup for sex play since Betra and Oses both love it when everything smears. They say it shows I’ve been well used. Otherwise, I tend to wear very little. I went all o
ut, giving myself a Cleopatra/ancient Egyptian effect, with my eyes outlined in thick black and mascara clotting my lashes. I played with foundation and other stuff I had to create shadows and hollows and highlights, transforming the contours of my face. A liberal use of ruby red lipstick made my lips seem twice as large as they actually are.

  “I can’t wait to wear some of that red on my cocks,” Oses growled.

  I blinked at my reflection in the mirror. I did not resemble Shalia Monroe. Even without a mask, I doubted I could be recognized. The transformation was startling.

  Betra’s gaze widened with appreciation. “You’re a different woman.”

  “Are you bored with the same old Shalia?” I teased.