Project (Un)Popular Book #1
Page 18
“He could see out the windows in Idaho History,” I told her. “That’s why we have to set the ladder up in the exact same spot. And do the exact same thing. So everybody in the classroom thinks Derby is as cool as Fletcher. We need to treat them totally as equals. So people get confused and think Derby is popular.”
“Wait,” Venice said. “You’re skipping stuff. Why was Derby at your house?”
And then I decided I needed to stop lying to Venice too. “Because his mom was paranoid that we were trying to trick him and she was worried that we were secretly mean kids who were going to image-edit his face and remove his teeth.”
Venice gasped. “We’re not like that at all.”
Then I heard her phone beep. And I knew it was Leo. And that really bugged me. Because he was interrupting a superserious conversation. I couldn’t believe he didn’t have more patience.
“Okay,” I said. “I need to work on my topographic map. I’m going to send you the email and I’m just gonna hope that you and Leo deliver.”
“We’ll do our best,” Venice said.
But I wasn’t sure that was enough. Because that meant she might leave stuff off the list.
“I need everything on this list or we might fail and Derby will remain Derby and Anya will still be Miss Bossy McBoss-Boss-Pants and nothing will change,” I said. “Except maybe Anya will get bossier.”
There was silence again. And I was really afraid she’d accepted Leo’s call and was talking to him.
“Okay,” Venice said. “We’ll deliver.”
And that totally thrilled me. “Awesome!” I yelled.
Then I heard a knock on my door. “Everything okay in there?”
And even though I’d promised myself that I would stop lying, I felt like under these exact circumstances, it was okay to fib to my parents.
“Treasure Valley has never looked so good!” I said.
“What?” Venice asked.
“Nothing,” I said. “My parents think I’m making my map.”
“Mr. Falconer is nuts,” Venice said. “Those projects are so hard. My fingers are stained green from making the pasture for my diorama.”
But I didn’t have time to worry about Venice’s finger stains. I had to hang up before my parents caught me on the phone. So I recapped our situation quickly. “Me do homework. You and Leo deliver. Cool?”
“Cool. Leo totally knows how to deliver,” Venice said. “His brother works for a pizza place.”
But I didn’t care about Leo or his brother. Didn’t Venice know that?
I went to the living room and pretended that I was looking up some important map-building information.
“How’s it going?” my dad asked.
“Better and better,” I said. Because that was a safer answer than telling him I hadn’t started yet.
“Do you need any help?” he asked.
“Maybe later,” I said. “When I get to the glue stage.”
“I’m all yours,” he said.
But I wasn’t going to get to the glue stage until tomorrow. Because I was still on the dress-Derby-normal stage.
Venice and Leo:
Here is a list of everything we need. If you can’t get something, please text me. I will try to get it myself. Even though I am super busy and don’t have time to do that.
Essential Items:
° Sneakers with laces that aren’t neon or weird looking or made out of coat hangers
° 1 pair jeans with thrashed knees that don’t flare at the bottom
° 1 pair gray pants (in case his knees look terrible exposed)
° 3 different shirts (No dweeby sayings. No stripes. No patterns. No collars. Stuff Leo wears would work. Avoid harsh colors like black and white)
° 2 pairs socks that are neutral color (No terrible ankle socks. Must go to mid-calf at least)
° 1 large chain (essential for backdrop)
° brush/comb
° hair spray
° colorless lip balm (in case his are chapped)
° water bottle (in case we need to restyle hair from scratch)
° hair gel
° leaves (live green ones or dead brown ones)
° a red or green or yellow hoodie (In case hair is total failure and we need to cover it. These colors look good in black-and-whites.)
° fake fur coat (Derby needs this!)
Thanks for your help.
Bye!
Perry
I looked over the list. It seemed totally reasonable.
“Are you sending emails?” my dad asked.
And then I realized I had forgotten that I’d lied to him about why I was on the computer. I really needed to stop doing that.
“I needed to give some information to Venice,” I said.
He seemed to think that was okay. “It’s pretty much time for bed.”
“Yeah,” I said. Because I felt totally exhausted.
“Here’s some good news. After you turn your map in you don’t have any major assignments for a week,” he said.
But I already knew that. Because I was responsible and checked TRAC twice a day. I mean, it felt like my homework was never going to end.
“You have to write a report on a nineteenth-century biologist,” my dad said.
“Right,” I said. But really, I thought that sounded crazy. Because writing an essay for Science felt weird. We should have only been dissecting dead things and watching gross movies for that class. I hurried back to my room and got ready for bed. I felt so excited to turn Derby’s life around. I mean, after talking to his mom it did really feel like if anybody on the planet deserved a shot at being popular, it was Derby Esposito.
I stared at the totally faded stars on my ceiling. I wondered if Venice ever regretted giving them all to me. As I drifted off to sleep, I told myself that I should ask her about that. Because maybe I could give her some of mine. That way she wouldn’t have to fall asleep under a totally empty ceiling.
—
It took Venice and Leo several days to deliver. And the day they did, it sort of blew my mind. Because it meant Derby’s photo shoot was really going to happen. I ate my breakfast as fast as I could and got all my stuff together.
“You sure are eager,” my mom said as I zoomed out of the house.
I called to her over my shoulder, “It’s going to be an amazing day.”
I walked to school faster than I’d ever walked before, even though I knew that once I got there I’d probably have to face Anya. But even when that happened, I told myself that it would be okay. Because we’d be seeing each other in a public space. And it wasn’t like she could yell at me in front of Ms. Kenny. And why should all her ideas win and mine lose? It shouldn’t have been that way. I wasn’t going to let her destroy my chance to help Derby escape his dweebiness.
I didn’t race to the Yearbook room. Instead, I raced to the janitor’s closet to make sure it was unlocked. I grabbed the silver knob and turned it. Bingo. It opened. This was really going to work. On a normal day, where Anya hadn’t declared I was awful at the local gym and stripped me of my fabulous nickname, I would have checked with her to make sure it was cool for me to borrow the ladder. But I didn’t need to do that anymore. Because if she was done with me, I was done with her. All I needed to do was get Ms. Kenny’s permission to leave and take Venice and Leo with me and perfectly recreate Fletcher’s photo shoot. I mean, every stinking detail needed to be the same. Except for Fletcher.
Before I had a chance to approach Ms. Kenny, Sabrina came bopping over to my desk wearing boots with tiny bells on the sides. She looked super calm as she jingled over. Then she smiled. “Anya sent me over here.”
“Oh,” I said in a depressed voice. That wasn’t awesome news. I liked Sabrina. And I didn’t want her to start delivering mean messages to me from Anya. I mean, if Anya and I were done, I didn’t think she should be communicating to me through the design squad.
“Don’t freak out,” Sabrina said, giving my side a playful nudge with
her elbow. “She wants to ask you something.”
I glanced over at Anya. She was talking to Javier and Eli by the master calendar. And they were laughing. I bet she was giving Javier my nickname. I mean, he looked super happy about something. It was really painful to watch that happen, even if I wasn’t sure that was even what was going on by the whiteboard.
“Does she want me to come over there?” I asked. Because maybe I’d misunderstood what it meant to be done.
“No!” Sabrina said, grabbing hold of my wrist. “Don’t go over there.”
She looked really scared that I might do that. “Okay.”
“I’m going to ask you something for her,” Sabrina said.
And that was interesting to learn, because I wasn’t sure what it could be.
“Remember last week?” she asked.
And that question seemed sort of big. “All of it?” Because I certainly remembered some parts of it better than others.
“Okay,” Sabrina said in a whisper, looking over her shoulder. “Anya needs me to ask you something and you can’t tell anybody that I’m asking.”
This made me feel uncomfortable for several reasons. “Um,” I said. “I guess.”
Sabrina looked back at Anya and smiled. “Do you think Fletcher was flirting with Anya when you guys took his picture?”
I blinked. “Um,” I said again. Because I didn’t really think that. Unless I had missed something, he did zero flirting with Anya and maybe a tiny bit of flirting with the coat.
“It’s just,” Sabrina said, drumming her pen on the desk, “Anya says she felt a vibe. And she wants to know if anybody else felt it.”
This was so stupid. If Anya and I were done, then she shouldn’t have sent Sabrina over to quiz me about vibes. It was like Anya didn’t even know the definition of the word done. It was like I needed to have Piper call her and tell her.
“Oh my heck,” Sabrina said. “I can totally read your mind right now.”
“Huh?” I said. Because that was a creepy thing to tell somebody. And I really hoped it wasn’t true. Because I didn’t want Sabrina to be done with me. Even though she was a follower, there was something sweet about her that I liked.
“You can’t read my mind,” I said, shaking my head.
She nodded. “I totally can.”
How do you politely make mean people leave you alone forever? That was what I wanted in this moment. I wanted Anya to vanish, like a greasy fingerprint that gets wiped off a window. Squeak. Poof. Gone.
“Tell me what you saw,” Sabrina said, grabbing on to my hands. “Anya is going to flip out.”
What had I seen? A pushy eighth grader kissing up to a photogenic seventh grader who had starred in a toothpaste commercial?
“Did you notice anything about his face?” Sabrina asked.
I couldn’t believe she was still pressing me for details. Anya must’ve had a mega-crush on Fletcher.
“He did blink a lot,” I said.
“Really?” Sabrina said, getting a little giddy. “Anya said that too. And she swears he puckered his lips like this.” Sabrina made fish lips several times in a row. “Did you see him do that?”
I had not seen that. And I sort of doubted it had happened. “I missed that.” I looked over at Anya again. She’d pulled out a small mirror and was finger-combing her bob.
“Anya said he was sly about it,” Sabrina said. “But I totally think he might like her.”
“Huh,” I said. Because I really was super eager to ask Ms. Kenny for permission to leave and get far, far away from this conversation.
“They’d make a hot couple,” Sabrina gushed. “They’d be fierce.”
“That’s true,” I said. “Hey, I need to ask Ms. Kenny about something really quick.”
And I didn’t even wait for Sabrina to react to that. I just hurried over to Ms. Kenny’s desk.
Ring.
I jumped a little when I heard the warning bells. They always caught me off guard. Ms. Kenny stapled an advertisement contract together as I approached. I wasn’t sure exactly how to catch her attention, so I just blurted out what I needed to say.
“Can Venice and I borrow the staff lanyards so we can take a few pictures this morning for the What’s Hot section?” I asked. “And maybe take Leo with us?”
“Does Anya know?” Ms. Kenny asked.
And that was the perfect question to ask me. Because while Anya might have been furious with what I was doing, I didn’t have to tell Ms. Kenny that. “Anya knows,” I said.
“That’s fine,” Ms. Kenny said, handing me three staff lanyards. “Don’t forget after school you’re taking the girls’ basketball photos. I wish you’d already taken the club photos. I keep feeling like you’re behind.”
I understood why she felt that way. But that was really all Anya’s fault. “We’ll make it happen,” I said. Because I really wanted to be taking more pictures. And now that Ms. Kenny was letting me take my first photos on my own, maybe she’d let me take others on my own. I smiled at her.
“Do you know if Anya sent an email reminding the team?” Ms. Kenny asked.
I shrugged. “I emailed Poppy Lansing.” Not only had I reminded her about the shoot, I’d sent her an article that listed the most flattering hairstyles for group shots.
“Okay,” she said. “I’ll double-check with Anya.”
I tried to ignore the fact that Anya was glaring at me something fierce when Ms. Kenny handed me the staff lanyards and I walked back to my desk. I just kind of sat there and tried to stay calm. I focused on thinking about happy things. Like muffins.
As soon as Venice and Leo arrived, things got pretty exciting pretty fast. They had two big backpacks full of stuff. I rushed over to them.
“I think it’s a little weird that you wanted a chain,” Leo said.
But I ignored that comment and focused on what was important. “Where is it?”
He carefully set the second backpack down on the floor. It jangled a little bit when he did that.
“The hair gel has a watermelon scent,” Venice said. “Is that okay?”
I nodded. Because it didn’t matter what anything smelled like. It only mattered what it looked like.
Ring.
When the bell rang I was super excited to get going.
“Leo,” I said. “We need you to help us carry the ladder.”
“Whoa,” Venice said. “We’re using the ladder again.”
I pointed at her. “Derby requested it. The ladder is happening.”
“Should we drop the backpacks off at the shoot site first?” Leo asked.
But I worried that somebody would steal them. I mean, just because we were in middle school didn’t mean we weren’t totally surrounded by thieves.
“We wear them,” I said.
Anya gave me a death stare as I slinked out of the room with Leo and Venice. Luckily, Leo wore the heavy backpack and Venice volunteered to wear the other one. I was super relieved when we got to the janitor’s closet and it was still open.
“We’re allowed to do this?” Leo asked as we walked past the mop bucket and grabbed the ladder by its metal legs.
“Totally,” I said.
It was actually a good thing we had Leo with us, because he was excellent at aiming the ladder out of the closet and guiding it down the hallway. Plus, he took the heaviest end.
“Where are we going again?” Leo asked.
I couldn’t believe he’d already forgotten. “The west exit,” I reminded him.
“Can you guys handle this if I go and get Derby?” I asked.
I wasn’t sure if Venice had the arm strength to get the ladder out of the building.
“I’m fine,” Leo said.
“It’s cool,” Venice said.
I was so thrilled by how things were going, I ran down the hallway to get to Derby’s class.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
I felt so nervous as Mr. Falconer opened the door. Because it was one thing to sit in a classroom while your
teacher teaches you. But it was a totally different thing to talk to him in the hallway.
I lifted up my staff lanyard so he could read it. “Is it okay if we borrow Derby for a few minutes?” I asked.
And I was totally expecting Mr. Falconer to demand more details. But he did the craziest thing. He said, “Sure, Perry.”
Derby didn’t look thrilled when he came to the front of the class to meet me.
“I told you that I didn’t want to miss first period,” he said.
But he didn’t understand what a good plan we had. He didn’t understand that we were going to take his picture where everybody could see him and that I’d gotten the ladder and a coat and that things were going to be awesome.
“We need to match the light from yesterday,” I explained. Which was the exact truth.
Derby and I hurried down the hallway to the west exit, and when we got there it was super amazing to see everything already spread out. The coat on the ground. The ladder standing up. The chain curled into a mound.
“So we brought different clothes for you,” I said.
Venice unzipped a backpack and handed him a pair of jeans with shredded knees and a red T-shirt.
“Isn’t what I’m wearing okay?” Derby asked. He stretched his arms out and rotated for us. His pants were yellow corduroys, but maybe a little too faded. And his shirt was light tan, so it didn’t really provide any contrast.
I tried to explain this to him as kindly as possible. “Your look is way too monochromatic. You’ll look like a noodle.” Because he looked exactly like a piece of fettuccini with a hairstyle on top.
“A noodle?” Derby asked, sounding offended.
“What she means is that your top half and bottom half match too much. Jeans will read better in the lens,” Venice said. “Trust us.”
But Derby still looked offended. He didn’t look like he wanted to trust us at all.
“Let’s take a look at what I’ve got,” Leo said. “Something will work.”
“I’m not changing outside in front of everybody,” Derby said.
And I was shocked that Derby thought we wanted that. Because revealing his underwear to Idaho History wasn’t going to make him popular. “Of course,” I agreed. “Go inside to the bathroom. Here, use my lanyard.”