100 Days: A Billionaire Romance

by Alexis Angel

  So I’m looking at this form. And it’s saying business deductions. And I’m wondering do the sex toys count as business deductions? I mean I need them to write to see if a scene is hot or not, ya know? Like test it out LMAO. What would the IRS say?

  Oh, to top it off, then I start to imagine me sitting at the IRS office getting audited because for Occupation I put “Smut Queen” since I am like the #6 author in contemporary romance (woohoo!). And I’m all dressed all sexy in front of this IRS guy and he’s like what kind of smut? And I show him and he gets all flustered because he reads it too. And he’s like, fine take all your deductions and I’m like thanks!

  Yeah, I forgot what I was talking about just now and obviously went off on a tangent. But it’s good because I needed this break to talk to you guys. Doing taxes suck. I should have done my own way before this. But I gotta get it done today L

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis

  HEA

  So, guy I was dating has like totally fizzled out…

  Match.com guy.

  I gave him plenty of chances to express SOME sort of interest but while I could tell that he was into me and he wanted some, he just didn’t act. Even when I gave him multiple openings. I couldn’t have dropped any more hints without like you know, taking off my panties and writing my number on them – which you remember I did in the past haha.

  But honestly, in all seriousness, it’s like I would have had to take off my clothes and then take off his clothes and then get him hard and then get on top of him and have sex with him and maybe he would figure out that I was sorta into him.

  But I can’t do that. I don’t have the upper body strength to be able to move him like that. So I dunno. I guess I gave him several opportunities and when it didn’t happen, it’s time to move on. And I’m okay with that lol!

  But I feel kinda bad because I’m writing these happily ever after stories and I’m in a far from happily ever situation myself. But then I stop and think.

  I have my Naughty Angels. They make me happy.

  I have my Dirty Lil’ Angels on Facebook. That makes me so happy.

  I make countless readers happy (hopefully) every day. That makes me SOOOO happy!

  I have my parents and friends and everyone I know on Facebook.

  I have my fellow authors – I’ve learned so much from them and aspire to be so much like them.

  I have you guys and I look forward to talking to you everyday. It’s amazing and so therapeutic.

  So, I mean, who says I don’t have my HEA for right now?? Just because I’m not married doesn’t mean I’m sad. OMG. Maybe back in 1939 that was true but hello, its 2016!

  So, you know what? I’m so happy. Sure I’m not in a relationship right now. But I'm prolly the happiest I've ever been.

  So if you're out there in a bad marriage, single, divorced, or in a marriage and lonely, don't give up hope. Reach out to your sisters - the women around you. You'll never know how loved you are till you do!

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis

  HFN

  So remember back in the day (yesterday) when I said I was prolly get old alone by myself?

  So do you know Madison Faye? She is an awesome author. So she messages me today because she needed some info from me and I was all like waking up. But I was like “Hold on I just woke up but I need to get home and get you the deets”.

  That’s right because I totally woke up in some guy’s house. More appropriately in some guy’s bed. Not just some guy but this guy I’ve been crushing on for like a long time since last week when I saw him at the wine bar that he works at.

  But it’s completely crazy because yesterday after I wrote the email for my NL I went back to work and afterwards took my laptop and went to the wine bar and was drinking and working when this guy who works there comes by because he’s not working that day but just to say hi. He sees me as he goes to the bar to order some dinner and I say hi and we’re talking omg. He’s kinda cute but whatevs that could be wine goggles because I’ve had like three glasses of wine and it’s like evening. So we talk some more and he asks me what I’m working on and I don’t wanna tell him.

  But he keeps pressing me and I’m collaborating on a scene with Lana and I show him. He reads it and I swear I was only just glancing down towards the ground but I see his crotch and it looks like he’s gotten kinda hard omg yay!

  Then, instead of being all judgy he asks if I write pretty consistently and I’m like hello, I’m actually pretty prolific. So he takes my number and I get his and he says maybe in the future we can write together.

  A few hours later we’re texting. Then we’re sexting. Then I’m ubering to his place. Where we try and act out a chapter from 12 Inches.

  He’s not boyfriend material. But he was great one night material to make you forget. And put a smile on my face.

  :)

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis

  Sexy Saturday

  I just wanted to say "Sexy Saturday" okay?

  Lets see, I woke up with Wine Bar Guy this morning around 9 am PST and somehow managed to do the walk of shame back home (which wasn't too far) and shower and do some writing.

  Yeah, it was a good night last night. Although, trying to walk back in heels the morning after kinda sucks. So that's why this little bunny made sure to pack some flats in her purse! My genius astounds me.

  Then tonight I have dinner with a girlfriend after which we're going to a house party where we're meeting these two guys she knows. They work in tech, and the guy that I'm meeting works at Intel, so I'm gonna call him ComputerChip.

  So, as long as ComputerChip and I don't run into WineBar I think we should be cool. But WineBar has work today so I'm not worried. I'm gonna head to the gym (not the actual gym but the one in the building) and then shower and get ready for dinner.

  So that's two dates in one day!! Yayayayayaya!!! <3

  And yes, I do count waking up next to WineBar and giving him a slurpee a "date". We both did some eating, just not food, per se.

  And as long as ComputerChip and I don't actually hook up before midnight, we're fine. Which means no penetration inside of me. That means that up to 11:59 pm the chastity belt has to stay on, but then at midnight the belt comes off - along with everything else, baby!! LOL

  Why is this? I just don't wanna be like the kinda girl that sleeps with two guys in one day, you know? It would be one thing if it were like they were together and like one of them was doing me from the back and the other I was going down on. But like they don't know about each other and I wanna be respectful because one of them could end up being the one. I just have that personal code of conduct when looking for love.

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis

  Naughty

  I am going to go to sleep now. At 6:30 am in the morning...

  So the problem is that BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) isn’t like the New York City subway and it only starts at like 5:30 am. But I left this house party with my friends at 4 am but we couldn’t get home and couldn’t get a cab to take us back to San Francisco (we were in the East Bay) and BART was closed. So we just huddled together like kittens for two hours (there were 3 of us) on the couch. Bear in mind we didn’t know the host.

  And CompterChip – the guy I was supposed to be hooking up with ended up being a douche (I’m gonna go get some sleep and then I’ll tell you that story later today - seriously be prepared for a really great BAD DATE STORY) and so it was just me and the girls.

  I almost felt like calling WineBar and asking him to pick me up and take my friends, but we've only hooked up like once so that's a total girlfriend move to do so I don't wanna go that route yet.

  So my girls are just sleeping on the couch and I was sitting there, and the clock was like 4:30 and people have either passed out or gone home and the house is quieting down. I couldn’t sleep (although now I wish I had) so I just looked at my TBR and
I found Kira’s book.

  Wanna know something kinda naughty?

  So as my friends are on the couch sleeping, I’m reading this hot sex book and maybe it’s the wine or whatevs but I get kinda hot. Oh my God, don’t look at me like that, I didn’t cum or anything. But I may have kinda sorta had a few touches. I mean don’t tell Kira or anything, okay? Whatevs, she’s prolly signed up to the NL so if she’s reading, I hope your happy babe.

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis

  ComputerChip

  Oh. My. God.

  Now that I got some sleep, I’m totally able to focus on what went down last night.

  I mean, at first the night was pretty good. With my girls it was amazing. We got picked up by this old guy driving a limo who was looking for fares to go across the bridge to the East Bay and since we were crossing the Bay Bridge we were like sure why not?

  So we got a bottle of champagne from this one store (cheap stuff, like 5 bucks tops) and some glasses and were all big baller in the limo as we cruised down the Bay Bridge. Dinner was fun too! But then we went to this house party.

  So I had been texting with WineBar a bit throughout the night and he was like I’m working so you know, I can’t show you pictures of my cock but here’s a picture of a beer imagine its my cock. And I’m like WTF. Like, what kinda sexting is this, ya know?

  So anyways, my friend is gonna introduce me to ComputerChip who works at Intel and is supposedly hot. He does hang gliding on his spare time.

  I don’t really have many expectations because after dinner I’m sorta buzzed. LOL like all I can think about is maybe finding the keg and getting some more beer. Seriously, plz don’t think I’m an alkie or anything, I was just having a fun night.

  Anyways so finally, CompterChip guy comes over with his friends. And I take one look and I’m like oh hell no.

  1He has a damn unibrow

  2He’s wearing a sweater vest

  3I have bigger arms than him (like the arms are skinny)

  I’m not ALL about looks, and if he really was so hot according to my friends’ friend, I thought lets give him a chance. So I smile sweetly as he gets me a beer and we go off to talk a bit. I’m still keeping an open mind because I mean, we’re at a party. This is the very definition of fish in the sea. There are fish swimming all around me.

  So when I come back I’m gonna tell you all about what happened afterwards.

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis Angel

  Freeway

  So I have forgotten the Bad Date Weekend

  I have dance class every Monday morning. I drive across the San Rafael bridge to get to my dance class. It’s a fun two hours I practice (FYI I used to be a competitive ballroom dancer back in the day) and today I was driving down and the toll booth was slowing traffic down and it was the morning and I was doing my makeup in the car like I normally do.

  I was wondering to myself like why do I even bother to do makeup because it’s obvious after ComputerChip that I’m gonna be stuck with unibrow losers who don’t wear clean clothes and are virgins. Either that or I’m gonna be stuck with WineBar who is a cute guy and works as a bartender and gives me good love but when I try to get him to sext he sends me pictures of beer bottles and not his cock.

  So I’m thinking this is my dating life at the moment. It’s not so bad.

  And then I look over out my drivers side window.

  And realize that cars are going really slowly in traffic so I’m crawling along and this guy is looking at me. Making faces.

  I’m a bit taken aback but he makes a face and a caricature of putting on lipstick using the rearview mirror.

  I can’t help but laugh!

  Then he makes a face of doing his hair. Obviously he’s making fun of me and who knows how long he’s been watching me as we crawled through traffic.

  I can’t help but LOL at his antics.

  We go on back and forth a few times.

  Finally the crème de la crème.

  He somehow has a blank piece of paper and he writes on there and holds it up to his window.

  “Pull over after the toll”

  I dunno. This is the kinda stuff you see in movies. Get kidnapped and then chopped up and stuff. Or read about in kindle books under Dark Dark Romance lol.

  But right after the toll booth I’m a bit intrigued and from the waist up he looks kinda cute.

  So, I pull over.

  His name is FREEWAY and tomorrow I’m gonna give you the deets on what happened afterwards!

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis Angel

  Freeway Part Two

  Sorry about the freebie yesterday, fixed it!

  So I dunno if you caught my last newsletter but a lot of you have mentioned that you are reading them daily and if there is a way I could all put it together. Let me know if that’s something you would like to see. That way you can keep like all the things I said and have an archive. I might also be too full of myself and waaaaay to vain so if you think it’s a terrrrrible idea lemme know too, k?

  Anyways, so there I was, having pulled over my car on the side of the freeway getting off the San Rafael bridge because some strange hot guy heading to the toll booth asked me too. I mean, what if all he wanted was to carjack my car? I just leased it a few months ago. Maybe he wants to steal it? I would wanna steal it. When I get time I’ll show you some pictures of it lol.

  So he pulls up in front of me and he gets out and OH MY GOD. He’s gorgeous.

  I immediately get out of my car too and I forget that I’m just wearing yoga pants and a really loose shirt over a sports bra – no makeup no nothing. And this guy is probably in a $1000 suit. From my Wall Street days, I’m guessing either Brioni or Ferragamo. Like he knows how to dress.

  So I don’t remember the whole conversation unless I’m in my head and thinking it, but the gist of it (romanticized in my head) went like this:

  FREEWAY: I saw you and had to get you to stop

  ALEXIS: Uhm, hello, Normal people don’t do this.

  FREEWAY: What is your name, gorgeous?

  ALEXIS: Uhm, I’m Alexis. Whats yours?

  FREEWAY: Freeway

  Alexis: Oh. Hi.

  FREEWAY: We don’t have time for small talk. We’re on the middle of a busy…freeway. Have a drink with me this Friday.

  ALEXIS: Kinda sudden, no? You don’t wanna sext first?

  FREEWAY: So we can send each other pictures of our privates?

  ALEXIS: Yes?

  FREEWAY: Shouldn’t we do that after a few drinks at Bourbon and Branch?

  ALEXIS: I dunno if I should do speakeasy with a strange man

  FREEWAY: That’s fine. Take my number. Call me if you change your mind. Or send me a picture of your pussy if your more comfortable

  ALEXIS: (laughing) You know I was joking about sexting right? I only do that with people I’m gonna sleep with

  FREEWAY: You’ll want to sleep with me.

  ALEXIS: Really?

  FREEWAY: Yup. Here’s my card. (heading back to car)

  ALEXIS: Don’t you want my number?

  FREEWAY: Nope. You can call, text, or email me. Up to you.

  And then he drove off.

  Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,

  Alexis Angel

  Calling Him

  I will call Freeway

  Okay, I think my email server is telling me that I need to call him. Besides its been over 24 hours now – it’ll be 48 hours tomorrow I’ll give him a call sometime tomorrow afternoon. I’ll call Freeway.

  I would call him today but I have to get DILF ready and while the man may be cute looking, I need to work. No way in hell this man is interfering between me and work.

  I have his number though and I’m gonna call him. Not gonna sext him. But later on tonight I’m gonna google him. See what he’s all about. Maybe look him up on womamsavers.com.

  Have you guys ever used it? Its so amazing. So if you’ve dated
a guy or whatever and he’s cheated on you or stolen from you or hit you or anything and you wanna make sure that other women don’t fall into the same trap as you, you just put up a picture of him and put down the details on womansavers.com.

  I looked up WineBar after I met him. I didn’t look up ComputerChip. But I need to look up Freeway. I’ve gotten cheated on once, and it’s not fun. I don’t ever wanna go through that again, you know? I mean, if the guy would come up to me and be like hey I wanna do such and such and maybe can we invite another girl and do a 3some I’d be open minded (maybe) about it. But to not tell me and cheat is something else, ya know? I dunno why it sucks so much – maybe because when someone cheats on you it feels like they’ve just thrown away the intimate moments you’ve built together. That’s why my novels will never, ever have cheating in them.