by Sandy Loyd
“We can’t all be saints like you, little brother,” James mocked, as he opened the locker.
“Yeah?” Paul sneered, rising to the bait. “It seems to me you could at least show a little sincere regret over breaking up with her.”
James’ eyes narrowed to slits. “Let me give you some advice.” There was no mistaking the heat of anger rising off his body. “You shouldn’t stick your nose into things that don’t concern you. My relationship with Kate is my business. You know nothing about what went on between us.”
“I know she doesn’t deserve to be treated the way you’ve treated her all those years.”
James slammed the locker door, his expression turning livid. “Point taken, but who are you to be telling me how to behave? You never wasted any time trying to bring her down a peg with your constant haranguing. So, don’t lecture to me about treating anyone the way they deserve. Kate never deserved your sarcasm and cruelty. I should have shut you up back then, because you’re right. She deserved better than the two of us.” With those words, he snatched his clothes and stalked into the men’s room to change.
Paul stared after him, swearing under his breath. He should have kept his mouth shut. Why had it bothered him that James seemed so cavalier about their breakup? It should have made him feel better knowing the two were no longer together. But the thought of James taking Kate so lightly did anger him. James’ reaction, once Paul thought about it a moment, made him realize his brother wasn’t as unaffected as he’d portrayed.
He gave James a few minutes to cool off then grabbed his stuff to change into and headed for the restroom. He spotted James, who was pulling on a pair of faded jeans. He walked over to him. “I’m sorry. You’re right. It is none of my business.”
James accepted his apology with a nod. “You hit a nerve.” He ran a hand through his hair. “For what it’s worth, I haven’t slept with anyone—including Kate—in months, and I was planning on ending things so she could find the right person. I do feel bad about letting us go on for so long.” Then, he snared Paul’s gaze, his serious. “So, what about you and Judith?”
“She and I are friends, period,” Paul replied truthfully, wondering about the question. “I should’ve let her go a long time ago too.” Sitting on the bench, he leaned over and put his elbow on his knee, cradling his chin with his hand. He blew out his breath in a long sigh. “Man, how did we get to be so pathetic?”
Laughing, James clapped him on the back. “Cheer up, we’re getting wiser. Well, I am anyway. Since I’m the one with the date tonight, it’s obvious I’m moving on. I suggest you do the same.”
Paul watched his brother tuck in his shirt, totally cheered by his words. Somehow, in the past twenty minutes, James had provided answers to several of his questions without being asked. He knew now that James didn’t see Kate as his any longer. It was completely over between them. He also learned his brother still cared about Kate, as a friend, not as a lover, and that made all the difference in the world to him.
But Paul wasn’t stupid. James had to have a pretty good idea of Paul’s feelings for Kate. His question about Judith confirmed this. He was doubly glad that James still cared enough about Kate to make certain Paul wasn’t trifling with her.
During the drive back to the house, they each cracked jokes about the day, and both claimed supremacy over the other for their prowess in the snow. Neither mentioned Kate or the topic of James’ breakup.
James eventually left for his date with the snow bunny and Paul ate dinner by himself. Afterward, he pulled out his laptop, determined to put the rest of the night to good use. He fought throughout the whole evening to avoid thoughts of Kate, not wanting to dwell on the jealousy lurking over some guy named Mike.
There was nothing he could do about it until he confronted her—and his plans definitely included confrontation. This had gone on long enough. It was time she realized the truth. They belonged together. He’d make sure she understood, so that there’d be no mistaking what they shared.
The next morning Paul was up early. By the time James came slowly out of his room, he was eating breakfast, having already showered and made coffee.
His brother padded over to the pot and poured a cup. He leaned back against the counter and crossed his legs at the ankles. He stood like this for several minutes before finally looking over at Paul and lifting his mug in a silent toast. “I should’ve stayed home with you last night. Brandie, that’s with an ie, not a y, got on my nerves after the salad arrived.” He rolled his eyes. “It’s been a while since I dated a bimbo, and that’s bimbo with a capital B. I’d completely forgotten why I steered clear of them in college.”
Paul grinned. “That bad, huh?”
James grunted. “Worse. She even signs her name with a heart over the i.” He frowned. “God, I hate the dating game.” After a long drink, he said, “I realized that’s part of the reason why I stayed with Kate so long. That and the fact that even after eight years, she never bored me.”
“I hate the dating game too, but I don’t expect I’ll be playing it again, except with one special person,” Paul said in a low voice. “But I’m sure you already figured that out.”
James, about to take another sip of coffee, stopped with the cup an inch from his mouth. He eyed Paul thoughtfully, then offered an exaggerated sigh. “What gave me away? I tried to be so careful.”
Paul laughed. “Oh, you were. You had me going for a while. Besides, I should be asking you…what gave me away?”
Grinning, James replied, “You know I can’t tell you because if I did, you’d learn all my secrets. Damn, I must be getting rusty. But then again, my concern for Kate weighed more on my mind than razzing you. I just wanted to be sure—for Kate’s sake. She doesn’t deserve another Morrison who can’t commit. You do plan to commit, right?”
“Yeah, if she’ll have me.”
“Are you sure you can handle her?”
“What do you mean?” Paul asked, his eyes narrowing.
“She’s a steamroller.” James shook his head and laughed. “She’s lot of woman for such a tiny thing—and at times I found it difficult to deal with.”
Remembering their few battles, Paul smiled and said with supreme confidence, “Yeah, I know. But we seem to do well together. We understand and respect each other. Or rather I should say, she understands that I’m not about to let her walk all over me.”
“Are you saying I did?”
“You’re the one who said it was easier to give in.”
“Touché.” He offered a second toast. “You’re a better man than I ever could be.” He hesitated and his expression turned more serious. “So you can deal with the fact that we’ve slept together?”
“Not really,” Paul said, grunting. “I want to bash your brains out, but seeing as you didn’t bash mine out when I was a jerk to her, I guess I owe you. Besides, you said it yourself. There’s a lot of woman in that compact body and I’ve already proven I can handle her, which does make me the better man.”
James’ head snapped up and his gaze flew to Paul’s. Something akin to hurt lurked in those blue eyes, so much like his. Or maybe he just looked lost. James cleared his throat and the look was gone. “I wish you luck.”
“Thanks.” Paul started for his room. As he passed his brother, he clapped him on the back. “Cheer up. Your time is coming. She just wasn’t the right one for you.”
“Yeah, well…we’ll see.” James shrugged and looked away. A few seconds later he asked to Paul’s back, “Are you about ready to hit the slopes?”
“Sure,” he said over his shoulder. “But I’m driving separately.”
“Oh?”
Paul nodded. “I’m heading back to the city early.”
“Okay. I’ll meet you at the tram when it opens.”
Sitting on the K-2 lift after skiing for several hours, Paul’s thoughts were on the same thing he’d been thinking all morning, Kate and this Mike character. He couldn’t expel them from his mind, no matter how hard
he tried.
He sighed. He really didn’t want to ask James about what Kate said, but he felt at this point the need to know outweighed any ribbing he’d attract.
“So tell me about Mike,” he said a few minutes later.
James’ laugh floated past him. “I wondered when you’d get around to him. You know, if you’d have let me continue my game a little longer you could’ve found out without humbling yourself now.” He glanced over at him with brows quirked. “What do you want to know?”
“What information were you going to let me in on?”
James shrugged. “I don’t know much more than what I told you earlier. She skied with him, got a ride back with him, and he invited her to dinner. She made it seem as if he was the reason she was breaking up with m.” Then with a sheepish, lopsided grin, he added, “Well, I did nudge her because she ended things so abruptly and I was shocked. I knew then something happened last weekend and your face flashed like a neon sign. My guess is that when I pushed her to find out more, she put up this Mike as a decoy. She gave a good bluff, too. I should’ve known she was on to my tricks. Then, when I think about it, what was she supposed to say? ‘I spent a few days with your brother and we connected so well I want to call it quits?’” He snorted. “You know I don’t appreciate hearing stuff like that, and it isn’t easy being dumped.”
James’ expression and words had Paul laughing. “What if I was just one-upping?”
“No way! I’m sure of that, especially after this morning. If I wasn’t so relieved, I think my pride would be more hurt. But I’ll get over it; you two deserve to be happy.”
“What about Mike?” Paul prodded.
“She said she has a date with him tonight. That’s the excuse she used to cancel our plans for this weekend.” He chuckled. “I thought I had it planned flawlessly…the perfect setup. Have her here and you come in at the end. Just thinking about the scene had my mouth watering.”
“Okay, but let’s get back to Mike and Kate.” Paul made a hand movement to hurry James along. “And their date tonight. Do you think she’s really interested in this guy?”
James sighed. “Man, I’m glad I’m not in your shoes.”
“Yeah, I got that. Just answer the question,” Paul demanded, getting annoyed.
“I don’t know. What I do know about Kate is that she’s loyal. If there is something between the two of you, Mike hasn’t got a prayer.” He stopped and thought for a minute. “You know she did say something interesting the night we broke up. She said she was through being the pursuer. Then she said…and I quote, ‘If he wants me, he knows where I am.’ I assumed at the time she was talking about this Mike guy, but now I think she was talking about you.”
The chair neared the top. As Paul put up the bar and prepared to disembark, he ran through James’ comment several times.
He skied off the lift then stopped beside James, who was tightening his boots.
“I’m outta here,” he said. “Sorry to leave you hanging, but I need to take care of a few things.”
He took off down the path toward the bottom of the mountain as fast as his skis would go.
Chapter 17
Paul raced to the bottom of the mountain and quickly changed. Because he was in a hurry, several friends’ attempts to engage him in idle chitchat were met with grunts and his back as he headed to his car and his quest to get back to San Francisco.
Once on the main road, he increased his speed, driving as fast as the car and road allowed. He prayed he wouldn’t run into any members of the California Highway Patrol. Not even the threat of a five-hundred-dollar ticket was enough to slow him down.
His luck held. He made the trip back to the city in record time, thankful the seven-series BMW was built for excessive speeds for long periods. He cruised Kate’s street. It was Saturday, so he found a spot close to her apartment. Seconds later, he stood at the row of buzzers outside the main door. After jabbing the right button, the intercom came alive with a burst of static.
“Yes? Who is it?”
“Kate? It’s me, Paul.”
There was a long pause before she asked, “What do you want?” He couldn’t miss the note of agitation in the four words.
“Can you let me in?”
“Go away!”
“Come on, Kate, open up. I need to talk to you.”
“No. Please, just go away. I don’t want to talk to you.”
“You’re not going to listen to what I have to say?” Paul ground out in frustration.
“There’s nothing to say. Please leave. I don’t want to see you.”
Stilling the urge to hit something, he took a deep breath instead and raked a hand through his hair, trying for patience.
“I can’t leave. Not without saying what I came to say.” Though he’d brought his anger under control, there was no mistaking the steely edge in his voice. “I deserve that much, don’t you think?”
Long seconds passed before the latch clicked. Paul released a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. He ran up the stairs, taking them two and three at a time. At her apartment, he found the door open about an inch. He pushed it open wider and slipped inside.
Having never been in her place before, he noticed at once how cozy and inviting the large, open room appeared. Kate sat at a table in front of a big bay window overlooking the street. He inched closer until he stood a few feet away, and studied her for a long moment without speaking.
Kate looked up and met his eyes, hers flashing anger. “Well?” Her chin lifted defiantly.
She wasn’t making this any easier. He ran a hand through his hair. “Like I said, we need to talk.”
“Why? What will it change?”
“What can it hurt?” He bit back a smile when she crossed her arms and glared, daring him…almost goading him.
“God, you are beautiful,” he whispered. “Come here.”
He reached down to touch her hand and fought harder to restrain the grin breaking free when she leaned away, her expression growing wary. With a firm hold, he gently tugged, pulling her out of the chair and into his arms. The move caught her off guard and he increased his efforts to soothe her. It took only seconds before she relaxed and hugged him back, which told him more than words ever could. Paul only wanted to comfort her. Despite her earlier battle-ready stance, he couldn’t stop himself from lowering his head and meeting her lips with his. She looked too adorable, too kissable, too irresistible, and he’d wanted her for much too long.
At first, she stiffened, but he kept his mouth malleable and begging, waiting her out until she softened and opened for him. When she moaned and wrapped her arms around him tighter, bringing him closer, blood pounded in his ears and surged through his system, flooding him with unleashed desire.
Breaking the contact with her lips, Paul spread kisses over her face and eyes. When he neared her ears, he lingered. He caught a whiff of her perfume, the scent reminding him of the last time they’d kissed. His fingers slid underneath her sweater, skimming the underside of her breasts.
Kate’s soft moan permeated his brain and seeped into his soul, driving his need to the brink.
“Please, Kate, let me love you,” Paul whispered in between kisses. He lifted his head and his expression was pleading. He waited, holding his breath, while several emotions played across her features, the biggest one a yearning he connected with. He let out a sigh of relief. He hadn’t been wrong. She did feel what he felt. Yet, instead of giving in to her emotions, she closed her eyes and shook her head. “I can’t.”
~
Kate pulled out of Paul’s arms and took a step back. Noting his stunned look, she spun around and paced, wringing her hands. Her brain refused to function any time he was near. Why had she let him in? And why had she let him kiss her? She was in huge trouble because all she wanted to do was grab him close and never let him go. But she couldn’t. He didn’t belong to her.
The knowledge seared her soul like a hot poker. The pain brought on tears, and once th
ey started, she couldn’t stop them.
Paul reached for her. She felt his lips as he kissed her tears, following them until they reached her mouth, before working his way back up to her eyes.
“Don’t cry, Kate. Just tell me what’s wrong.” He met her gaze and she heard the teasing in his voice when he added, “And here I thought you liked kissing me.”
She smiled, her eyes misty, and shook her head, too choked up to speak.
“Then why are you crying?” Paul asked gently.
Kate couldn’t talk about it yet. All she could do was shake her head again. The tears continued to fall.
Paul pulled her closer, and she curled against him. For moments, he did nothing but hold her and let her cry, stroking her as if she were a cat he was trying to make purr.
Silence filled the room except for the sound of her sobs.
After a while, her sobbing ceased.
Paul’s voice startled her. “You’re not going anywhere with Mike tonight.”
“What?” She leaned away from him to glance at his expression, not sure she heard him correctly.
“James told me you have a date tonight and I don’t see how you can go through with it after what just happened,” he said, clearly incensed.
His words and disapproving tone stunned her. How dare he condemn her for trying to move on with her life? She yanked out of his hold.
“I don’t see how it’s any of your concern who I date. Who’re you to tell me what I can and cannot do?”
“I’m the man who just held you while you cried,” Paul ground out, his body stiffening. “And I repeat—you are not leaving to go out with some other guy before we talk this out.”
Those words had her chin rising another inch, and she glared at him. “You think a few kisses give you the right to run my life? Think again—I decide who I date and when I date him.” Pointing at the door, she turned away. “I think it’s time you left.”
She felt his eyes on her, but she ignored him and put some distance between them.
“Kate—I didn’t come here to fight.” He sighed. “We need to talk.”