Shadows: A Love Ever After Series

by Amber Lacie

  "Yes." This feels perfect. Sitting back on his knees he pulls my legs over his shoulders. Continuing with his movements, he leans forward just a little. It's so incredibly deep this way.

  "Theron, harder. Theron!" I'm panting and I can feel my orgasm building. I feel my walls clenching his hard cock as it slams in and out of my pussy.

  "Fuck, Eve. You. Feel. So. Fucking. Good." Each word is emphasized by deep thrusts stroking my core.

  "Oh God, Theron!"

  "Say it again, beautiful. Scream my name."

  "Don't stop!" His rhythm is relentless as he pounds into me. My hands are fisting the sheets. "Theron!" His name leaves my lips as my body spasms.

  He grunts, and I know he's with me. He releases himself into me, yelling my name. "Eve, oh fuck!" His body collapses on me.

  We are both out of breath. I am covered by Theron. His body is hot, wet, and slick with sweat against mine.

  Bracing himself with his forearms, one on each side of my head, he looks down at me. He doesn't say anything. He just kisses me softly and rolls to his side, tying a knot in the condom and tossing it to the small trashcan on the floor. He pulls me up onto the pillow beside him into his arms with his front to my back. I'm exhausted and worn out. Lying there trying to steady my breathing, I welcome the sleep that comes to claim me.

  Everything is red. I know I'm looking for someone, but I can't see them. My vision starts to come into focus, and I see it’s my hands that are red. Looking down I see Matt staring up at me. His eyes and chest are motionless. I'm screaming for someone, anyone to help me. People keep walking past and then suddenly we are surrounded by bright lights. I can hear people talking and they take Matt from me. I scream at them to fix him. I desperately want him back. They lay him on a bed and close dark grey curtains around him. Someone is holding me back, and I drop to my knees. I'm begging for someone to help me. I'm screaming and no one is listening. Sobs wrack my body as I completely lose my mind.

  "Eve, shh. Eve, it’s okay. It’s over. I have you, babe. Open your eyes for me."

  I wake up to Theron holding me against his chest while rocking me back and forth. I'm crying uncontrollably. Wrapping my hands around him, I bury my face in his neck. He tucks my hair behind my ears and makes soft circles on my back with his hands. He says nothing as he holds me while I cry.

  I have no idea how long we sit like this. My legs, bent underneath me, are starting to go numb. I need to stretch my muscles, but I feel so incredibly weighted down. Taking a deep breath, I lift my head to look up at him. I study his face rubbing my hands across it. His jaw is perfectly squared and his stubble is so soft under my fingers. Stopping at his lips, I rub my thumb across them as he presses a soft kiss on it. I run my hands through his hair as I look into his amazing eyes. One is such a bright green and the other is such a deep golden brown. They mesmerize me. I press my forehead against his. He feels so right, but I feel so guilty.

  "I shouldn't be feeling like this." I bite my bottom lip, trying to hold back tears.

  He looks straight into my eyes. "Feeling like what, babe? It's okay to hurt. It's okay to grieve."

  "No, that's not what I mean at all."

  "Then, what?"

  "It's you, damn it. I shouldn't be feeling happy or warm or comforted. I shouldn't be rolling around laughing on some guy's floor that I just met. I shouldn't be having sex with someone when I just watched my friend die in my arms, only a few hours ago. I just shouldn't."

  "Why shouldn't you? I'm not saying everything should be fucking sunshine and butterflies, but you are allowed to feel, Eve. You have to. I know this is hard. It fucking sucks, but you have done nothing wrong." He lifts my chin with his fingers. "You have done nothing wrong. Tell me, Eve, tell me you know you have done nothing wrong."

  "I can't. I fucking can't!" Screaming at him, I smack his hands away. I stand up and frantically get dressed. As I pull his t-shirt over my head, I turn to face him. He's sitting on the bed, staring at me with a hurt look in his eyes. I don’t know if it's for me or caused by me.

  "Tell me, Eve. Tell me you haven't done anything wrong." Pulling his jeans up, he walks over to me. He reaches for me and I push him away. I don't want to be touched. I don't want to feel this good, when I know I shouldn't be.

  "I said I fucking can't, okay? What the hell do you want from me? I feel so guilty. I can't help the way I feel, Theron. I want to go home and I can't. I want to call my best friend and I can't. I can't because he's fucking dead! He's fucking dead because I couldn't love him the way he needed me to. I couldn't be his person and I hate myself for it. I just want him back. Please, Theron, please. I just want him back."

  "Babe, I'm sorry. I can’t bring him back for you and I think you know that. It's okay to feel angry and hurt. What do you mean by your person?" He pulls me to him and I let him. I never had a choice. My body would have gone to him anyways. He's rubbing his hands up my shoulders, almost like he's trying to warm me up. I don't feel cold. I feel hot and angry, but my body shivers anyways.

  "Matt said I was the one person he was meant to love. He said he loved me." I touch my fingers to my lips. Was it just last night when he confessed his feelings to me? It feels so long ago. "He kissed me and I didn't kiss him back." I wrap by arms around Theron's neck. He picks me up and I bury my head into his neck as I cry. He carries me into the living room and sets me down on the couch. Grabbing my purse off the ottoman, he fishes for my phone.

  "Who are we calling, beautiful? I know you need more than me right now. I don't want you to go, but you need your friends and family. So, who's it going to be?"

  "What time is it?" I wipe my nose on my sleeve. It's not very lady like, but I don't care.

  "It's a little after five, babe. We got in early this morning. I let you sleep for a couple of hours. You took a shower around one and then I distracted you some more before you fell asleep again. You needed your rest. I won't apologize for that."

  "My brother should be home now. He's staying at my parent's. Can you call Robert for me? I'm sure he would come get me."

  "No one is coming to collect you, beautiful. I'll take you wherever you want to go. I need to clear up one thing from earlier though." Taking a big breath, he moves to sit beside me. He's running his hands through his sexy locks and I can tell he's nervous. The one gorgeous lock of hair defies him again, and falls on his forehead making me smile.

  "I noticed your reaction to my last name. So, you know, yes, it's that Rowe. That was my Grandfather's company, but now it belongs mostly to my dad. My mom had shares in it when it first started, back before it became a takeover company. When she died, her shares became mine. I worked for my dad for about two years, after college. I will spare you the details, but I quit. I sold my shares and I used the money to travel for a while. My Gram had a heart attack last fall, so I moved into the guesthouse to help her. Originally, I did it as a favor to my dad. At the time, I couldn’t figure out why I would want to help the bastard, but I'm glad I did. My Gram is amazing, and nothing like my father. I often wonder if he was switched at birth. Anyways, I just wanted you to know where I stand. I'm not a multi-billionaire and I don't run my own company. I'd rather not be associated with him." He lets out a deep breath and looks at me. Does he think I want his money? That's not me. I am not that kind of person.

  "I could care less what kind of money you have. I know who Thomas Rowe is. I did a report on him my last semester of college. He's arrogant and ruthless. He monopolizes small businesses until there is nothing left, and then sells them in pieces to the highest bidder. My brother is a whiz in finance. He had an interview in their New York City office, but turned them down for an ecological analytic group in California. I'm sorry, but I am not a fan of your father's." I'm not exactly sure why, but Theron looks relieved, smiling a huge toothy grin. His teeth are perfect just like the rest of him. He kisses my nose and then my forehead.

  "Well, thank God for that. I was worried there for a few minutes, but I figured if you could make my sk
in buzz just at the thought of you, then it wouldn't matter."

  I'm taken back by his words. So, his body does it too? It's not just me. He takes my phone and calls my brother. The phone call is short and direct. I bet it's awkward for both of them.

  "Right, well, I got the address in my phone now. It shouldn’t take us too long to get there. I haven’t eaten anything, and I know you haven’t, so I was thinking of making us something light to eat before we go."

  "You don’t have to."

  "I know, but I want to. I'm going to make us a couple sandwiches quickly and then we will be on our way. Is turkey and cheese okay?" I'm not sure I can eat, but my stomach proves me wrong by growling loudly. "I will take that as a yes. So, we will eat, and then we will head out. Come have a seat and I'll set our plates."

  Walking over to the island, I sit on a barstool, making sure not to wrap my feet up in it this time. We finish our light meal and I grab my purse.

  Theron holds my hand as we walk to his car. This is the first time I've taken notice of it. Being a mechanic's daughter has left an imprint on me. I love cars. It's a red metallic BMW X6, four-door coupe. I absolutely love it. It looks like badass sex on wheels.

  He opens the door for me and I slide into the white leather seats. He starts the car with a push of a button and we are on our way. The drive is quiet except for the beautiful melody coming through the speakers.

  "Theron, who is this playing? It's beautiful." I love that there are no words to the music right now. It's comforting.

  "Simply Three. This is their cover of Fix You and Clocks by Cold Play."

  "I love it."

  Neither of us speak again for the remainder of the drive. I'm getting nervous as we get closer and I start chewing on the inside of my cheek. Theron lays his hand on my left thigh and makes small circles with his thumb. It's such a simple gesture, but it eases my nerves.

  "This is it on the left."

  Theron parks the car in the gravel driveway. I go to reach for the door handle, but he stops me. "Wait, I'll come around."

  I nod my head, wishing I could smile at him, but I feel nauseous. I am desperately holding back tears. Giving me a soft smile, he opens my door. We are hand in hand as we walk to the front door.

  "You can go…I mean I'm sure you don't want to stay and watch me freak out again. So, you can go…if you want. You don’t have to stay." I don't attempt to look at him. Keeping my head down, I bite my lip. I am trying so hard to hold onto my sanity right now.

  "What? No, Eve. I'm not going anywhere. I already told you, I am going to keep you. You are mine, beautiful. I won't ever leave you." Lifting my chin, he places a soft kiss on my lips. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Before either of us can knock, the door opens and Robert is staring at us. He holds the door open for me. The intense look he gives Theron does not go unnoticed.

  "Everyone else is in the family room. Mom made some tea and cookies."

  Of course she did. My mother would never let anyone go thirsty or hungry. She loves feeding people.

  We walk into the room and immediately my mom rushes at me. She hugs me tightly and kisses my cheeks. Smiling as best as I can at my mom, I look around the room. It's not just us here. Paul and Kayla are here as well. She looks just as bad as I do. Her face is puffy and her eyes are red from crying. Taking an unsteady breath, I wipe my cheeks. They are already wet from my tears. Kayla won't look directly at me. I wonder if she is afraid she will break down. It's why I'm not looking anyone directly in the eye. We stand there awkwardly looking at everyone until Theron clears his throat.

  "Mrs. Davidson, I'm Theron Rowe. I'm sorry we are meeting under such saddening circumstances. If there is anything I can do at all to help, please let me know." He places a kiss on the back of my mom's hand and she is instantly blushing.

  "It's lovely to meet you. Please, call me Linda. This is my husband, Phillip."

  My dad appears over my mom's shoulder and gives Theron a once over. "Thank you for bringing Evelyn to us. I hope you found it easily enough."

  "It wasn't any trouble at all, sir. She is very upset, as to be expected. I don't think she should be alone right now." Splaying his hand across my lower back, he kisses my temple. It instantly makes me feel more at ease.

  "Right. Well, then I'm going to assume you will be staying here for a bit until Evelyn is comfortable. Why don't we go out to the garage and give the girls some alone time?"

  "You'll be okay?" He squeezes my hip. I'm afraid for him to let go, but I don't show it.

  "I need to talk to Kayla right now. So, I'll be fine." Theron and Paul follow my dad outside, but Robert lingers. I know he's not happy with the situation between me and Theron, but I want him to leave it alone.

  "Look, Eve, I'm not sure I like this guy. He's taking advantage of you. If you want him to leave, just tell me. I'll make sure he's gone. You won't have to ask twice."

  "This isn’t a cock fight, Robert. You don’t need to puff out your chest like a pissed off rooster. Go outside with your dad. Now." My mom has quickly put him in his place. He follows the rest of the men and heads outside. No one argues with my mom, well at least no one that wants to live to talk about it. "You girls need each other more than you need me. I'll be in the kitchen making dinner."

  "Mom, I'm fine. We had sandwiches before we left."

  "Sandwiches are hardly a meal, let alone dinner. Like I said, I'll be in the kitchen." I watch my mom walk into the kitchen. I'm afraid to look at Kayla. I have been a complete shit of a friend to her in the last twenty-four hours.

  "Eve, I just…what are we supposed to do? I don't want to go home. His stuff is there. It's all over our apartment. I don't want to be reminded. What happened? One minute you guys were talking at the table, then I look up and you're gone. What the fuck happened? Why were you guys outside?" Kayla's tone is iced with anger. She's mad, and I don't blame her. I'm so fucking mad at myself. If I didn’t run, if I would've just stayed there and talked to him, neither of us would have been outside. Matt would still be alive. I'm sobbing uncontrollably and I can't breathe. Everything feels like it's crushing me, my lungs are burning and then everything goes black.

  I can hear people arguing, but their voices are low and muffled. Opening my eyes, I look around. I blink a couple of times to help focus my eyes. I'm lying on my mom's couch. Sitting up, I rub my face. I'm not sure I can handle this. Breathing is hard and I'm trying not to cry again. The arguing is getting louder and I can finally make out the words.

  "Who the hell do you think you are? You don't know her. How could you possibly know what's good for her? She's completely wrecked right now. She watched our best friend die. No one should have to do that. Then you come into the scene and suddenly you're her caretaker?”

  “Fuck you. You have no right to be here. You have no right to come in here demanding to know what happened. She fainted, you moron. What the hell do you think happened?"

  "I'm not demanding anything. I came back in to get a drink and all I see is Eve fall to the floor. I want to know what you said. I had her okay. She was the best she could have been, given the situation. You weren't there when she flipped out in the hospital. It took everything in me to hold her still. She was frantic. She was knocking around chairs, hitting me, clawing at my arms. You didn't see what I did. Then after she finally fell into a deep sleep, she woke up screaming. She woke up crying and screaming his name. She couldn't breathe. It was the scariest thing I have ever seen. I know what it's like to have the world dropped from underneath you. I watched my mother die slowly for two years, and I still felt like crawling into her casket with her. I know what it feels like to be so angry and gutted. All I'm asking is what you said. Whatever you said is probably the same thing that triggered her earlier. I only want to help her."

  "I am going to tell you something, and you better listen. I've never seen Eve hold onto someone like she was holding onto you at the hospital. It was like you were her lifeline. I don't know where you came from or what your intention
s are, but if you hurt her, I will fucking kill you. That is not an empty threat, Theron. I will hunt you down, I will kill you, and I will hide your body where no one will ever find it. Don't doubt me. I love Eve, and I will do anything for her. If for some idiotic reason, she feels the need to have your stupid ass around, then fine. Her family and I will be watching your every fucking move."

  What the hell happened? Why are they yelling at each other? I hear every word they say and all I feel is their love for me. I wish it was enough to erase this pain and guilt I feel.

  Walking into the kitchen, I see Kayla and Theron in a standoff. Neither one of them is speaking or moving. I can feel the tension from here. I'm not sure how to get their attention, so I cough. They both turn to look at me. Kayla shoots Theron a look, so he stays where he is. She follows me to the couch. I sit down as she pulls my feet into her lap and sits beside me.

  "Please don’t do that again. I about had a heart attack. Eventually we will need to talk about it, but I will let it go for now. I'm so mad at Matt for putting himself in that situation. I know I shouldn't be, but all I feel right now is anger. This sucks so badly. His dad wants to meet with us tomorrow to let us know about the arrangements. I don't want to go alone. Please just make sure you are there, okay?"

  "I'll be there. I'm sorry I've abandoned you. Please don't hate Theron. I don't understand it, but right now I need him." I wipe my nose on my sleeves for the umpteenth time today. I should just be wearing a shirt made from tissues. "My whole body reacts to him even if he's just walking into the room. He came into the laundromat yesterday. We talked and he helped me carry my baskets to my car. Our hands touched and I swear I felt a spark. I had goosebumps head to toe…I shouldn't be feeling like this after what happened with Matt."

  Kayla is wiping her tears away as she looks at me. I need to tell her what happened, but just the idea makes me nauseous. Puffing out my cheeks, I let out a breath. I can do this. I must do this. This isn't fair for her not to know what happened. Theron looks at me from the doorway and I nod to him. I need him here by me when I do this. I can't explain or rationalize my draw to him. All I know is right now I need him to breathe, he keeps the burning sensation that fills my lungs at bay. He sits on the edge of the armrest behind me and starts twirling my hair around his fingers. I may have told him a little of what Matt said, but he needs to know everything. He needs to know where I stand. Closing my eyes, I take a breath and relax my shoulders.