John Fitzgerald GB 04 Great Bra

by Great Brain At the Academy

  Father Rodriguez conducted the first class that morning as usual. Five minutes before the period ended he made a surprise announcement.

  “You will all now hold out your right hands so that I may inspect them,” he said.

  Tom knew he was caught as he watched the superintendent inspect the fingers of each boy’s right hand. The inspection ended just as Father O’Malley entered the classroom to take over as teacher for the rest of the day.

  “The following boys,” Father Rodriguez said, “will accompany me to my office: Thomas Fitzgerald, Jeremiah

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  Moran, Phillip Martin and Anthony Colacci.”

  They followed the priest down to the superintendent’s office on the ground Hoor. Father Rodriguez sat down at his desk.

  “I admit, Thomas,” he said, “that your remarkable skill in peeling potatoes had me completely baffled. Then this morning 1 made a discovery. While helping Father Petrie peel potatoes I noticed that the work leaves telltale marks from the paring knife on the thumb and index finger of the right hand.”

  “I take all the blame,” Tom said. “I talked Jerry, Phil, and Tony into helping me.”

  “That is very noble of you, Thomas,” Father Rodriguez said, “but a person who participates in a con-spiracy is just as guilty as the ringleader.”

  Tom was determined to try to save his friends. “If I had never come to the academy,” he said, “they wouldn’t be in trouble right now.”

  “You plead like the devil’s advocate,” the priest said. “But you did come. However, you do have a point. The punishment for your three conspirators should be lighter than your own. And since you have made expert potato peelers out of them, they will peel potatoes for the next three weeks. Jeremiah will take the first week, Phillip the second week, and Anthony the third week.”

  Tom heard his three friends groan as the sentence was pronounced.

  “As for you, Thomas,” Father Rodriguez said, “beginning tomorrow you will clean the dormitory washroom between seven thirty and eight o’clock in the evening on Mondays through Fridays and during the afternoon on Saturdays and Sundays. And make no mistake about it, I

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  want that washroom really cleaned. You will scrub the washbasins, shower room, and toilets and mop the floor daily. And that will be your assignment until you go for an entire month without getting any demerits. In addition each of you will receive five demerits. And may I remind you, Thomas, this makes fifteen demerits tor you this month. You may all return to your classroom now.”

  Jerry took the punishment like the good sport he was. “It could have been worse,” he said as they climbed the stairs.

  Phil was shaking his head. “I told you we would get in trouble,” he said. “And that stuff you gave us about you helping us, Tom, was just stuff. Father Rodriguez is going to make sure we don’t get any help peeling spuds-even if he has to sit there and watch us. You sure got us into a mess. Don’t come to me with any more of your bright ideas.”

  “That goes for me too,” Tony said.

  “But fellows,” Tom pleaded, “I thought you were my friends. You don’t hear Jerry crying, do you? What good is a friend if he deserts you the first time there is a little trouble?”

  “Well,” Phil said, “when you put it that way I guess I’m still your friend.”

  “Me too,” Tony said.

  “You won’t regret it,” Tom said, “because my great brain has finally figured out a way to get rid of Father Rodriguez.”

  Tom couldn’t have caused more astonishment if he’d said he was going to murder the superintendent. His three friends stared at him bug-eyed. Jerry was the first to recover enough to speak.

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  “And just how are you going to do that?” he asked.

  Tom’s idea had come to him so suddenly that he knew his great brain must have been subconsciously working on it since his first day at the academy.

  “I’m going to write a letter to the Pope,” Tom said. “I’m going to tell him that Father Rodriguez is running this place like a reform school. When I get through telling Pope Leo what is going on around here I’ll bet he and the general will excommunicate Father Rodriguez.”

  Jerry stared at Tom- “Who is the general?” he asked.

  “The head of the Society of Jesus is called the general,” Tom explained. “But the general and all Jesuits have to take a special vow of obedience to the Pope. And when Pope Leo tells the general to get rid of Father Rodriguez you can bet the general will do it.”

  Phil was shaking his head. “Don’t you have to get permission or something before you can write a letter to the Pope?” he asked.

  “I’ll explain to Pope Leo in the letter,” Tom said, “that I sure as heck can’t get permission from Father Rodriguez.”

  Tony still had his doubts. “If Father Rodriguez sees a letter going out of here from you to the Pope,” he said, “he will make you let him read it first.”

  “I never thought about that,” Tom said.

  Phil said, “Daniel could mail it.”

  “Who is Daniel?” Tom asked.

  “My older brother,” Phil said. “He comes to visit me with our mother and father every Sunday.”

  “That does it,” Tom said grinning. “Pope Leo is going to get an earful about this place and how Father Rodriguez is running it.”

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  CHAPTER SIX

  The Academy Candy Store

  I PERSONALLY DIDN’T BELIEVE Tom would last another month at the academy after getting fifteen demerits his first month. And I knew things must be pretty tough for Tom when he wrote me about having to peel spuds and clean the washroom. So tough that he had even written a letter to the Pope to complain.

  But I didn’t have any time right then to think about Tom and his troubles, because I had troubles of my own, and his name was Frankie Pennyworth. He was a four-year-old boy whose parents and brother had been killed in a land slide in Red Rock Canyon. Uncle Mark couldn’t find any relatives, so Papa and Mamma had adopted

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  Frankie. Having a foster brother was sure keeping me busy.

  Frankie was a real take-over kid. Tom used to swindle me out of my things. But not Frankie. He just took them. I guess he figured that now that he was a member of the family, anything the family owned he owned. Whatever he wanted of mine he would just take. Then he would look at me with those big dark eyes of his and say, “My wagon,” or whatever it was he wanted. He even took my pup Prince this way. I had to borrow my own slingshot from Frankie when I wanted to use it. But I’ll admit that he was generous. Anything I used to own that he now owned he would let me borrow. If you are wondering why I didn’t put up a fight, there were two reasons. Papa said I must humor Frankie because of the great shock the boy had in losing his own family. And having a younger brother, to play with and love was worth everything Frankie took from me.

  All I can say is that it was a good thing Tom had a great brain or he wouldn’t have even been able to get passing grades. Between doing the heavy penance Father O’Malley kept giving him and having to clean the washroom, Tom didn’t have much time left in which to do his homework. And unlike Mr. Standish in Adenville, the Jesuit teachers made a fellow do homework on every subject every day.

  Tom sure hated cleaning the washroom. He tried to hire other kids to do it for him. But they hated the work as much as he did and nobody would take on the job. Tom knew if he didn’t go for an entire month without getting any demerits that he might be stuck cleaning the washroom until school let out in the spring. Boy, oh, boy, what

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  a revolting thought that was for my brother.

  To help take his mind off this degrading job he put his great brain to work on how to get his candy store started. He thought of several plans but had to discard them. He thought of having Phil’s brother Daniel buy candy and throw it over the rock wall. But what if one of the priests found it before he did? And he thought about sneaking out of the academy at night and c
limbing over the big iron gate. He knew he couldn’t get over the high rock wall. But when he found out Father O’Malley had insomnia and walked around outside in the yard part of the night he rejected that idea. But did Tom give up? Heck no. He was sure his great brain would solve the problem sooner or later.

  One week after the silent treatment had begun, Willie Connors came over to Tom’s bunk. Willie sure must have suffered because Sweyn, who had the bunk next to him, had told Tom that Willie cried himself to sleep at night.

  “The week is up,” Willie said to Tom, “and I haven’t snitched on anybody.”

  Tom was sitting on his bunk with his three friends. “That is right,” he said.

  “It has been terrible,” Willie said. He looked as if he was going to start crying just at the memory of it. “I promise I’ll never snitch again.”

  Tom stood up. “All you fellows listen,” he said. “We can lift the silent treatment from Willie because he hasn’t snitched on anybody for a week. And Willie knows if he does snitch in the future that we will impose the silent treatment on him until school lets out.”

  I guess Willie wanted to make sure the silent treatment was ended. He walked around the dormitory speak-

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  ing to each boy just to make sure they spoke to him.

  That evening Father O’Malley again heard Tom’s confession. And again the priest imposed a heavy penance because Tom insisted he couldn’t honor somebody he didn’t like.

  The next day Tom gave Phil his letter to the Pope along with fifty cents-

  “I know it doesn’t cost fifty cents to mail a letter to Italy,” he said. “Tell your brother Daniel he can keep the change.”

  It just goes to prove how much faith Tom had that the Pope and the general would get rid of Father Rodriguez, Tom parting with fifty cents was like a bird parting with its wings.

  It wasn’t until the following Tuesday evening that Tom’s great brain gave him his first idea for getting his candy store started. He always locked the door of the washroom from the inside when he cleaned it so the kids wouldn’t walk on the floor before it was dry. The fellows all knew they were supposed to use the washroom on the second floor between seven thirty and eight o’clock.

  On this particular night Tom found himself staring at the trapdoor in the washroom ceiling. He knew his great brain was trying to tell him something. He stood on a washbasin and lifted up the trapdoor. Then he hoisted himself up into the attic. The ceiling was high enough for him to stand erect. He walked over to one of the dormer windows and looked down into the street. This was the side of the academy that was flush up against the sidewalk. There was a manufacturing plant and a warehouse across the street, but both were closed at this time in the evening. Tom knew his great brain had given him the so-87

  lution of how to get in and out of the academy without anybody knowing it. All he needed was a rope long enough to reach the street. Going down wouldn’t be any problem but coming up might. It was a long, long way for a fellow to lift himself hand-over-hand.

  He went to bed that night trying to think of a way to make it easier to get from the street to the attic. The next morning while he was tying his shoelaces the answer came to him. If he put knots in the rope about two feet apart he could use it like a sort of rope ladder. He could straddle a knot in the rope with his feet and use his arms to hoist himself up another two feet. Then al! he had to do was grab another knot and lift himself another two feet. By using his arms and then his legs it would be easy to climb that distance.

  His great brain had solved one problem only to leave him with a bigger one. How could he get the rope into the attic? He knew Phil could get; his brother Daniel to buy the rope. But if Daniel just threw it over the wall one of the priests might find it. He put his great brain to work again.

  The next afternoon when school was out Tom was sitting with his three friends under a tree on the grounds. Jerry had a piece of string. He was showing them how to tie some sailor knots. Jerry’s uncle was a sailor and had visited the family the summer before.

  “Where did you get that string?” Tom asked. “In the kitchen,” Jerry said. “Father Petrie saves all the string that is wrapped around deliveries from the meat market and grocery store. When I was peeling spuds this morning I asked him for a piece.”

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  Phil’s face was sad. “Your week of peeling spuds will soon be over,” he said. “Then comes my week.”

  “And after that comes my week,” added Tony mourn-fully.

  “Forget about peeling spuds,” Tom said. “My great brain has got almost everything figured out about starting my candy store. Jerry, tomorrow morning before Father Petrie comes into the kitchen you get me about fifty feet of the strongest string he has.”

  “What are you going to do with it?” Jerry asked.

  “I’ll teli you all about it Saturday,” Tom said. “I want to give my great brain time to make sure the plan is perfect.”

  Tom’s money-loving heart didn’t like what his great brain kept telling him. He knew he couldn’t operate his candy store without the help of his three friends. And to Tom giving up part of the profits was the same as a man lost on the desert giving up his last canteen of water. But he knew there was no alternative.

  On Saturday he met with his three friends under the tree in the yard. “We will now form the Academy Candy Store Corporation,” he announced.

  Jerry, Phil, and Tony looked at him as if he had just announced they were going to blow up the academy with dynamite.

  “First we will need a president,” Tom said. “And due to the fact that it is my great brain’s idea and I am going to finance the corporation, I will be president.”

  Jerry finally recovered from his astonishment. “What does that make us?” he asked.

  “Stockholders in the corporation,” Tom answered.

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  “And as stockholders you wilt each be entitled to ten per cent of the profits.”

  “Now you are talking,” Jerry said with a grin.

  Tom took out two of the silver dollars he had got from the poker players on the train and handed them to Phii.

  “When your family comes to visit you tomorrow,” he said, “you get Daniel to one side and slip him this money. Tel! him -to buy fifty feet of one-inch manila rope. It shouldn’t cost more than two or three cents a foot. He can keep the change if he will do what you tell him.”

  “Which is what?” Phil asked.

  “To bring the rope to the side of the academy where it is flush up against the sidewalk,” Tom said. “He must arrive at exactly seven thirty Monday evening. Tell him I will be at the attic window directly above the third-floor washroom. I will tie a rock on the end of the string Jerry got for me and let it down. All Daniel has to do is tie the string to one end of the rope so I can pull the rope up to the attic. Got it?”

  “Got it,” Phil said.

  Monday evening at seven twenty-five Tom made his usual announcement. “You fellows are going to have to use the washroom on the second floor for the next half hour.”

  Then he went inside the washroom and locked the door. He climbed through the trapdoor to the attic and opened the dormer window. In a couple of minutes he saw Daniel coming down the street. Jerry had doubted Daniel would cooperate. But Tom didn’t have any doubts after

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  learning Daniel had spent two years at the academy and stood to make fifty cents besides.

  Tom let down the string with the rock tied to it. He watched Daniel remove the rock and tie the string to one end of the rope. Then he hauled it up, coiled it on the floor, and returned to the washroom. He did his cleaning job and then joined his three friends on Jerry’s bunk.

  “Everything went according to plan,” he whispered. “Tomorrow you all start earning your ten per cent.”

  “Hold it,” Phil said. “I thought I had already earned my ten per cent by getting Danie! to buy the rope for you.”

  “You haven’t even started to earn it,” Tom
said. “Here is the way we will work it. Two of you will go with me to the washroom at seven thirty tomorrow night. One will have to stay and clean the washroom. The other one will go up to the attic with me to help with the rope. The third can remain in the dormitory. You will each take turns doing the different things that must be done to get the candy store going.”

  “Count me out,” Phil said to Tom’s surprise. “We will all get expelled for sure if we get caught smuggling candy into the academy.”

  Jerry shook his head. “What a worry wart you are,” he said with disgust. “We haven’t even opened the candy store and already you’ve got us all expelled.”

  “1 can’t help it,” Phil said. “This is the only Catholic academy in Utah. And if I get expelled my mother and father will never forgive me.”

  Tom hadn’t expected this. He looked at Tony.

  “What about you. Tony?” he asked,

  “Haw,” Tony said.

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  “Cut out that haw business,” Tom said. “Are you in or out?”

  Tony hesitated a moment. “I think Phil is right,” he said.

  “In that case,” Tom said, “would you and Phil mind leaving us? What I have to say is for the ears of stockholders in the corporation only. And Jerry and I will pick two other fellows to become stockholders.”

  Phil began biting his lip. “You mean we aren’t friends anymore?” he asked.

  Jerry spoke before Tom could answer. “Who wants to be friends with a couple of worry warts?” he asked.

  “Jerry is right,” Tom said. “We don’t want to have anything to do with a couple of fellows who are going to be worrying all the time about something that can’t hap-pen.”

  “What do you mean it can’t happen?” Phil demanded. “You can get caught smuggling candy into the academy and be expelled for it.”