Shadow Walker

by Connie Mason

  Dawn sighed, recalling their volatile parting. “I did at one time.”

  “You still do.”

  “I’m not sure anymore. Cole doesn’t deserve my love.”

  “What are you going to do about the babe? How far along are you?”

  Dawn recalled the times Cole hadn’t withdrawn from her during their lovemaking. Several came to mind. The most recent being the day he’d left. But she could have conceived before that. She thought back, shocked at how long it had been since her last cycle. If she missed another monthly cycle, it would be her third, which meant she must be three months into her pregnancy. She should have realized she was pregnant before now, but she’d been too miserable and unhappy to recognize what was taking place inside her own body.

  “I can’t be sure. Two or three months.” Her chin came up. “Don’t worry, I can take care of myself.”

  “Not while you’re working at the Watering Hole. You have to quit now, whether you want to or not. I’ll do my damndest to find Cole for you.”

  “No!” Dawn shot back. “Don’t you dare. Cole doesn’t want me. He’s never wanted me. I’ll provide for myself and my babe.”

  “Cole has a right to know. I’ll consult with Ashley, she’ll—”

  “Don’t you dare! I’ll leave town if you tell anyone. In fact, leaving town is probably best for everyone. Ashley will insist that I live with her and Tanner once she learns I’m carrying Cole’s child. I don’t want their pity.”

  “Be reasonable, honey. Cole will be returning soon. Don’t decide anything without consulting him.”

  “What makes you so certain Cole will return? He’s probably decided to join Running Elk. He’s accustomed to Indian ways. He even has a woman waiting for him there.”

  Sandy frowned. He was an old-fashioned man with old-fashioned values. A woman with child needed a man to protect her. She shouldn’t be doing the type of work that demanded more of her than she was willing to give. Working at the Watering Hole had all but destroyed Dawn’s reputation even if she wasn’t actually a whore.

  Once Sandy made up his mind, nothing would change it. He was as immovable as a mountain, dependable and loyal. “Pack your things, you’re coming home with me.”

  “What! I’ll do no such thing. I can’t live with you.”

  “You can and you will. I’ll marry you myself if I have to.” His words shocked him, but even as he said them he knew he’d meant them. Cole had used Dawn and deserted her. He should have known she could be carrying his child. If Cole didn’t return soon to claim his woman, Sandy would claim her himself and raise Cole’s child.

  “Dawn, listen to me. I’d never hurt you. I can’t leave you without protection, it goes against everything I believe in. You’ve refused to seek refuge with the MacTavishes, so I’m offering another alternative.”

  “People will talk.”

  Sandy let out a string of curses. “And they won’t talk about you if you remain here and grow large with child? Use your head, honey. I’m not a threat to you. Can you say the same for Cully Porter? Hell, I’ll marry you.”

  Dawn stared at him. “You’d do that for me?”

  “Not just for you, but for Cole. I’ll raise his child to the best of my ability.”

  “I could never be a real wife to you, Sandy, I’m sorry.”

  “Did I ask you to be?”

  Dawn’s hands clasped and unclasped in her lap, her nerves stretched taut. “I can’t live with you. I’ll remain here a while longer, until I reach a decision about my future. Perhaps I won’t carry this child to term. I’ve already lost a child of Cole’s. I appreciate all you’ve done for me, but it’s too much to ask of any man. You’re a good person, Sandy Johnson.”

  “You lost one child already?” Sandy asked, aghast. His face hardened. “That does it! You’re too fragile to live on your own. I’ll give you a week or two to resign yourself to our marriage, then I’m going to announce our engagement.”

  “Sandy, I can’t—”

  “No more talk, Dawn. Get some rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Wait! Promise you won’t tell Ashley or Tanner about the baby. I want to see a doctor first to confirm my condition.”

  “Very well, if that’s what you want. But sooner or later they’ll know you’re carrying Cole’s child.”

  After Sandy left, Dawn lay in bed staring at the ceiling, her head in a muddle. Common sense told her that Cole was never coming back. How could she support herself and a child on her meager savings? She could always take the money Cole had offered, but she was too angry at him to accept his charity. She knew the MacTavishes would take her in, but she didn’t want to become a burden to Cole’s family.

  Her thoughts shifted to Sandy Johnson. Why was he taking his loyalty to Cole beyond friendship? Trusting men still came hard for Dawn. She couldn’t help thinking that Sandy’s proposal masked an ulterior motive. It seemed unlikely that he would give up his freedom without asking for some kind of reward.

  During the following week, Dawn discreetly visited a doctor. After a brief examination he confirmed her pregnancy. She was still slim as a willow, so it seemed incredible to Dawn that she was three months along. Except for extremely tender breasts, her body hadn’t changed significantly. Her clothing still fit reasonably well, and no one suspected her condition.

  While Dawn dangled on the horns of her dilemma, Sandy became convinced that Cole intended to make his absence a permanent one. Taking matters into his own hands, he told Ashley and Tanner that he and Dawn were going to marry. The MacTavishes were shocked at first, still convinced that Cole would come to his senses and return soon. Then Sandy broke his promise to Dawn and told them she was expecting Cole’s child. In view of the circumstances, they agreed that Dawn and Sandy should marry.

  Ashley and Tanner had come to appreciate Sandy’s good qualities. Of course, they would rather raise Cole’s child themselves, but if Dawn felt uncomfortable moving in with them, marrying Sandy was the next-best solution. Ashley proclaimed that if she ever saw Cole again she’d have a hard time forgiving him.

  The wedding was set to take place a week later. When Sandy told Dawn what he had done, she was furious. But once she calmed down, she realized her choices were limited. What kind of life could a half-breed give an illegitimate child?

  Torrential rains inundated the Willamette Valley during the following week. The first day or two, business was conducted as usual at the Watering Hole. But as the rains continued it became more difficult for lumberjacks to cross the swollen creeks. When Sandy failed to show up two nights in a row, Dawn assumed it was due to the weather.

  Cully Porter was clearly disgruntled as he eyed the thin crowd drinking and gambling. Drenching rains were bad for business, and he looked for a way to liven things up. From the corner of his eye he spied Dawn. A slow smile stretched his lips. Her protector had been conspicuously absent the last couple of days, and an easy way to earn some extra cash and create a little excitement occurred to him.

  “Let’s liven things up, gents,” he announced in a loud voice. “Most of you have been waiting for a chance to thaw the ice maiden, and I’m going to make that possible for one of you lucky bastards. I propose an auction. The haughty half-breed goes to the highest bidder. The winner can rut with her until dawn, if he has the energy,” he said crudely. “Line up, gents, who’s going to make the first bid?”

  “I will!” called out a muscular lumberjack with arms the size of small oak trees.

  Dawn had paid scant heed to Porter’s announcement until she heard him mention her name. Her head swung around and her attention sharpened. When she realized what was happening, she took flight. Porter’s arm came around her before she made it to the staircase.

  “Ten dollars!” the muscular lumberjack shouted.

  “You can’t do this!” Dawn protested. “I’m not your property to sell. Let me go!”

  Porter grinned, his arm tightening around her waist as he swung her around to face the men participating
in the entertainment. “Come on, gents. Ten dollars won’t even buy a peek at the ice maiden’s titties.” He cupped her breasts suggestively. Dawn screeched and kicked, to no avail.

  “Twenty-five dollars,” another man shouted.

  From there the bidding progressed rapidly. When it reached seventy-five dollars, some dropped out. But a resolute few remained in the bidding, determined to win the ice maiden.

  * * *

  Hunched over his horse, Cole was drenched to the skin and freezing cold. Rain fell in solid sheets, making his progress slow and painful. He shrugged his discomfort aside when he pictured Dawn, eagerly awaiting his return. He guided Warrior down the muddy streets of Oregon City, his soaked buckskins clinging to him like a second skin and his hat so saturated with water it had lost its shape long ago. The journey from Powder River country had been long and arduous, but Cole had been spurred by his eagerness to reach Oregon City and Dawn.

  He was chilled to the bone and shivering uncontrollably. The cheery light shining through the front window of the Watering Hole lured him, beckoned him, compelled him. He pulled on Warrior’s reins. The horse obediently halted, waiting for his master’s direction. Some sixth sense drew Cole to the saloon even though common sense directed him to continue on. Common sense lost as Cole reined Warrior toward the saloon. A bolstering whiskey was just what he needed to thaw his frozen bones, he decided as he slid from the saddle and looped Warrior’s reins over the hitching post.

  Cole pushed through the swinging doors, pausing to get his bearings. What he saw made the blood freeze in his veins. His gaze flew to Dawn, held captive by a man dressed in fancy clothes. Every male inside the saloon was crowded around the pair. Even the poker tables were deserted. The noise was deafening as men shouted out bids, each one higher than the one before. When it dawned on Cole what was happening, the roar in his ears was no less deafening than the shouts of the men calling out bids. The last bid he’d heard was one hundred dollars, and he knew without being told that Dawn was the prize. The thought that he had driven Dawn to sell herself sent a knife lancing through his heart.

  A satisfied grin curled Porter’s lips as the bidding went to one hundred dollars. This night wasn’t going to be as disastrous as he’d thought when he first saw the thin crowd. After the last bid a hush fell over the crowd. Porter opened his mouth to declare the bidding over when a man who had just entered shoved through the crowd.

  “Two hundred dollars.” Cole’s voice had a hard edge to it, as if daring anyone to top his bid. No one did. The man who had bid one hundred dollars looked as if he wanted to tear Cole apart, but when he looked into Cole’s glittering green eyes he changed his mind. He drifted away with the rest of the unlucky bidders.

  “Did I just hear you bid two hundred dollars, mister?” Porter asked. He hadn’t anticipated such good fortune.

  “I did.”

  “Show me the color of your money.”

  Dawn had been rendered speechless the moment she spied Cole pushing his way through the crowd of men bidding for her favors. She’d thought she’d seen the last of him months ago. Now here he was, coolly bidding for her favors as if she were a common whore. She watched in dismay as Cole counted out the money and shoved it at Porter.

  “She’s all yours, stranger. I envy you the job of thawing her out. The only man she’s cottoned to is that Johnson fellow.”

  Cole’s glittering green gaze rested on Dawn. Dark currents swirled beneath the fiery centers of his eyes as he searched her face. It didn’t take a mind-reader to know what he was thinking. Gathering her courage, Dawn boldly returned his perusal. Who did he think he was? He had no right to judge and condemn her. Her chin lifted defiantly.

  “I’m not going anywhere with this man.”

  Cole smiled. A long, slow smile that contradicted her words. “Oh, yes, you are.”

  Swinging her into his arms, he started up the stairs. “Which room?” he called over his shoulder.

  “Second door on the left,” Porter replied as he counted the money Cole had thrust at him. “She’s yours for the rest of the night. No bruises or rough stuff,” he yelled after them. “And no marks where they’ll show.”

  “Put me down, damn you!”

  Cole gave her a scathing glance but said nothing. His face was set in harsh lines, his eyes cold and furious. He kicked the door to her room open and slammed it shut after he entered. Then he dumped her unceremoniously on the bed.

  Dawn stared up at him, her face mutinous. “You lost the right to dictate my life when you deserted me.”

  “Which one of those bidders downstairs would you prefer to bed?”

  “None of them! That auction wasn’t my idea.”

  “That fancy man downstairs said you worked here.”

  “That’s right. And don’t give me that condemning look. I had to support myself some way. This was the only establishment in town willing to hire me.”

  He glared at her, his eyes blazing fiercely. “Do you enjoy bedding a different man every night? If I’d known you wanted to take up whoring for a living I would have left you in Dodge City.”

  Cole’s verbal abuse pushed Dawn over the edge. He was leaning toward her, his face inches from hers as he flung his insults. Fisting her hand, Dawn swung at him and was rewarded with a satisfying thud when her fist connected with his jaw. He reared back, turning the air blue with his curses as he rubbed his jaw with the palm of his hand. Dawn’s own hand throbbed with pain. The blow might have hurt her more than it hurt him, but it served to cool Cole’s temper. Still rubbing his jaw, he sat down on the bed. Dawn scooted as far away from him as possible.

  “I’m not going to hurt you. I just want some answers. First, who is this Johnson fellow who bought your favors?”

  A bubble of laughter trilled past her lips.

  He scowled. “What’s so damn funny?”

  “You are. Don’t you recognize the name of your best friend?”

  Cole was shocked into silence. When he found his voice, words literally exploded past his lips. “You’re screwing my best friend! What in the hell is Sandy doing in Oregon?”

  Outraged, Dawn jerked upright. “Get out of here! Get out now!”

  Cole gave her a narrow-eyed smile. “I paid two hundred dollars for your body, remember. Before you earn your money, I want some answers. I repeat, what is Sandy doing in Oregon?”

  “I’m not sure. He said he wanted to try his luck in Oregon. He’s working for Tanner.”

  “Very good. Let’s drop that subject for a few minutes. Why did you leave my sister’s house? You had my share of the profits from the mill to live on during my absence.”

  “Was that to be my payoff for services rendered?” Dawn flung at him. “You used me, then discarded me. Your sister is too decent to be saddled with her brother’s discarded whore.”

  A shudder went through Cole. Was that how Dawn thought of herself? Was that why he’d found her selling her body? She’d never been his whore. He had come back from Powder River country to make amends. He was going to make her his wife.

  “What’s going on between you and Sandy?”

  “Sandy is my friend and protector. I … I’m going to marry him in a few days.”

  The words tumbled out before she had time to call them back. She had never actually agreed to marry Sandy, but she probably would have for her child’s sake. She didn’t want Cole’s child to be raised a bastard.

  “Like hell you are!” Cole blasted. “Are you sleeping with your ‘friend and protector’?”

  “That’s none of your business.”

  “I’m making it my business.”

  “You left me, Cole. You promised me nothing and I asked for nothing. I should have known better than to trust you.” What she really meant was that she should have known better than to fall in love with him. “Live in the past, cherish your memories, I don’t care what you do. I’m going to marry Sandy.”

  Something inside Cole snapped. Grasping Dawn’s shoulders, he gave her a vio
lent shake. “Are you sleeping with Sandy? You will answer me, Dawn.”

  “No, damn you! No! You’re the only one.”

  A shudder went through Cole. His hands fell to his sides and his chin dropped down to his chest. When he raised his head, his shuttered expression gave away nothing of his feelings. Dawn had no inkling of how hurt and disappointed he’d been on hearing that Dawn was bedding his best friend. At first he hadn’t wanted to believe it of her, but now he didn’t know what to think.

  He gazed down at Dawn, suddenly aware of her waiflike vulnerability. His anger deflated when he realized that he had acted like a bastard in the past. He’d treated Dawn like a possession, afraid to admit his love because of guilt. Unfortunately, he’d come too late to the realization that Morning Mist belonged in that distant part of his brain where all good memories are kept. Dawn was his present and his future. Now that he was finally ready and eager to love Dawn with his whole heart and being, he had lost her.

  No, he wouldn’t let that happen. He knew Dawn better than he knew himself. She couldn’t, wouldn’t, take men indiscriminately into her bed.

  “What about that auction I walked into tonight?”

  “Sandy hadn’t shown up for the past couple of nights due to the flooding. Cully Porter was losing business because of the rain and he wanted to liven the place up. I didn’t agree to the auction. I’d never do anything like that.”

  “Does Cully Porter own the Watering Hole?” Dawn nodded. “Was he forcing you to participate?”

  “Yes, but I would have found some way out of it,” Dawn said with a hint of defiance.

  Cole’s fists clenched at his sides. “I’ll kill him.”

  “You won’t do any such thing. I’ve answered your questions, now it’s time to answer mine. Why have you come back? Did you find Running Elk? Is all well with him and his people?”

  “Running Elk is taking his people to Canada. The government wants to deprive all Indians of their weapons and ponies and force them onto lands that are too small to contain their numbers. Do you know what that means? They’ll all die of starvation and sickness.”