The Gobi Desert

by The Gobi Desert (epub)

  He sniggered. ‘My appearance puts you off, does it? But you should be the last person to be offended by it. You were not in a very good way yourself, the first time I saw you, remember?’

  ‘I remember’ I said softly.

  *

  It was all so simple, my God, it really was! Of course I couldn’t have imagined beforehand in great detail the pitiful adventure which he related to me. Nothing in all of that in any case surprised me unduly, apart from just one thing. Now there had been someone who had loved Alzire more than Nevelsky, more than Sanders, more than I had perhaps, not counting the others, all those about whom I didn’t know anything. This was no doubt what had happened to Otto Streep, which would account for his present condition!

  He lost no time in setting out quite clearly how he intended to spend his time while on board ship, as well as what would be the relationship between the two of us. I wasn’t expecting very much in return, but he laughed out loud when I told him I would put at his disposal my second luxury cabin, which was still unoccupied and which seemed likely to remain so for some time.

  ‘I ask you, take a look at the things which thanks to your generosity, I have just acquired in Macao. You will search in vain for a dinner jacket, or a nice red toilet bag. So no more foolish remarks like that! The Otto Streep you see in front of you is restarting his life. As for the de luxe cabin, I saw one a short while ago on the bridge which would suit me very nicely, if the captain would kindly agree to let you have it to give to me.’

  It was just near the foc’s’le, right by where Kublai’s cage had been installed, a sort of look-out post which was also used for storing tins of paint. It was near the shower room and washbasins for the crew. When I realised that Otto Streep was serious in his decision, I didn’t have any difficulty in arranging for this little cabin to be fitted out for him, with a couchette together with a little wardrobe to take his meagre luggage.

  ‘Marvellous! Now all we have to do is decide how much you are going to allow me for looking after your tiger. But you must! I absolutely insist on taking on this responsibility, at least for as far as I shall be permitted to come with you, since I won’t be able to go everywhere I want. I’ll tell you why soon. But first of all, I’m used to undertaking this type of surveillance. Poor old Sanders, who was aware of this, trusted me with the Mikado, you remember. If the one wasn’t dead, and if the other could talk, they would assure you that they never had any reason to complain about me. And then I won’t pretend that the money that you’re going to pay me for this won’t be extremely useful. That said, and if you are satisfied, there will be nothing to stop you offering me a dram of whisky in the bar from time to time. I’ll never say no to that.’

  ‘The Mikado?’ I said. ‘After Singapore you let it travel alone as far as Sydney?’

  He stared at me ironically.

  ‘I see that unfortunately you haven’t got even the slightest idea about what happened,’ he said. ‘Why should it have continued its journey without me, that animal? It also stopped at Singapore. Everybody stopped at Singapore, for the same reason that Miss Alzire, she herself hasn’t stopped at Macao.’

  What could all this mean? I still didn’t know what he was talking about, but nonetheless I had a feeling that soon everything would become clear. As for Streep, he seemed to be daydreaming, his mind drifting further and further away. I brought him back to my cabin so we could talk more freely.

  He suddenly became alert and seemed to notice for the first time where he was.

  ‘You can’t say you’re doing too badly for yourself here. I know someone who would be amazed at this. Tell me, dear old Sanders, he would have been reasonable right to the end with regard to you. He wouldn’t have made you wait too long for your inheritance, that’s for sure! When it’s convenient I want you to tell me in a bit more detail what happened to him in this ridiculous accident. I admit I didn’t quite follow your explanation, though I’m no more stupid than anyone else in mechanical matters. So tell me, since it’s a question of mechanics, are you happy with the procedure used in closing the cage for your tiger? It was designed according to my instructions, you know? It’s much better, much more practical, than the one in the cage for the Mikado. But I can see you’ve got something else on your mind besides all this business. It’s her, isn’t it? It’s only her that you want to hear about? Well, all right then. And it’s too bad for you if in amongst everything I’m going to tell you there are some details which are not entirely to your liking. But don’t worry; after all that’s happened to you, I don’t think you will have long to wait before you get some news from her, since I know she is very unselfish.’

  *

  It was all so simple, as I said, and I can only repeat it. Otto Streep was the first to admit it: on board the Bendigo, it wasn’t her, but him, who had tried to strike up a conversation. She had spent the whole of the first week of the voyage in her cabin, only appearing at meal times and hardly responding to the advances which he ventured. It was fourteen days sailing from Fouzan to Macao. It was only in the last four days that the fate of Otto Streep was sealed.

  ‘The most comical thing was that she never asked anything from me. It was me who, as if on bended knees, offered her everything, including of course things which I didn’t have the right to offer her. The situation with regard to my personal fortune was, and still is, far from what you might call bad. I have some savings which I’ve earned in a respectable way in Sydney. It’s true that in order to get hold of the money in cash . . . . . But let’s get back to the point, and the point was a tiger, of a rare species. The money which I had on me, which was more than sufficient for a single man, became decidedly insufficient from the moment there were two of us. You need to have lived through those minutes to understand the thoughts that were passing through my mind, as our ship was approaching Macao. To let her go ashore in that town and for me to continue my journey alone, that would be to lose her forever. To live without her, never to see her again, had become from that moment an intolerable prospect for me. But to take her with me, after having paid the director of the casino the money which she owed him, that would need some money, seeing as the poor thing didn’t have a penny to her name, in fact it would need a lot of money, in any case more than I had in my wallet at the time.’

  ‘Was it she who told you she didn’t have a penny on her?’ I asked.

  He shrugged. ‘You may think it took me a long time to realise that for myself, but that was nothing compared to the way she went without everything on the ship, the poor child.’

  ‘And once you arrived at Macao, you say you went to pay off the debt she owed at her casino?’

  ‘I didn’t say anything of the sort,’ he said with a touch of impatience. ‘It was she herself who insisted on taking care of it. You think I should have excused her from this responsibility. But we only had three hours in Macao, and what with all the other things I needed to buy . . . . ‘

  He gave a mournful laugh.

  ‘Things which she needed. You see, I was afraid she wouldn’t use too much discretion if I left this task to her, although she told me I needn’t worry. You see where I had got to in all this. Every word she uttered had become the gospel truth for me.’

  ‘You probably still have the same confidence in her?’ I asked.

  ‘Are you joking?’ he said contemptuously. ‘It’s been a long time since I believed a word she says.’

  Lowering his voice and looking at me obliquely, he added: ‘Unless she’s here, of course!’

  We were both silent for a moment.

  ‘What are you muttering about?’ he asked abruptly.

  ‘Me? Nothing! Or at least nothing important. I was saying that I just realised why you stopped at Singapore, that’s all.’

  ‘Oh yes? And why was that?’

  ‘Why? Because Singapore is the only important market for wild animals in the whole of Asia.’

  ‘And so?’

  ‘And so – and tell me if I’m wrong – it was t
here that you sold the Mikado, wasn’t it?’

  He nodded. ‘I see that you have understood everything. That’s exactly what you would have done in my place, isn’t it?’

  *

  The sun was setting. The red glow from the sea shone through the portholes into the cabin. The dark mountains along the coast were gradually disappearing over the horizon.

  ‘You think that’s what I would have done in your place? Perhaps!’ I murmured after thinking about it for a moment. ‘And the money you got from the sale, she took that from you?’

  ‘We both spent it together’ he said.

  ‘You didn’t waste any time, did you? Didn’t you get bored, both of you?’

  ‘Yes, we did indeed. And I should tell you also that in Singapore, as we had to finish everything in a hurry, I didn’t get as much for the tiger as they had agreed to pay for him in Sydney.’

  ‘In Sydney where now you can’t set foot?’

  He lowered his head again. ‘That’s right.’

  I looked at him. It would have been hard for anyone to say whether I pitied him or envied him.

  ‘And when there was no longer anything more in the relationship,’ I continued with a fierce insistence, ‘she left you, just like that?’

  Stung back into life, he sat up straight. ‘I don’t regret anything.’

  ‘My God! I know the song. I’m sure you don’t even bear a grudge against her!’ I sniggered.

  He glanced at me with a look which made me shudder slightly.

  ‘Well that, that’s a different story’ he said.

  *

  On the deck and along the companionways, the gong for dinner could be heard. Otto Streep got up.

  ‘I’ll leave you now.’

  ‘Just a minute!’ I said. ‘I’m not in a hurry. When we’re in port there’s no need to dress for dinner.’

  He sat down again.

  ‘And her?’ I asked.

  ‘Her? What about her?’

  ‘Where is she? What’s become of her?’

  He shook his head. ‘You needn’t worry about her. She isn’t unhappy. You wouldn’t want her at all now. Some doddery old Englishman has become infatuated with her. Would you believe it! He’s almost as besotted as you are! Almost as much as I am even! He’s made of money. He’s the director of the company which is going to break through the Kra Isthmus. As you can imagine, people are all saying that he wants to marry her, but she, skinflint that she is, is sticking to her tactics and doesn’t want to marry him. I don’t need to tell you that I didn’t last long against such a noble gentleman. And it wasn’t long before I was declared an undesirable in Singapore. I was threatened with arrest if I didn’t get out. I couldn’t not take such a threat seriously, could I? There was the matter of the sale of the tiger, you remember?’

  ‘Yes, I remember. And . . . Is that all you have to tell me?’

  ‘Yes, for today at least. Good heavens, I think that’s enough, don’t you? Besides, as I said, I would be very surprised if you don’t get some news from her soon. She must read the newspapers like everyone else. It won’t take her long to find out how much an animal like your Kublai is worth.’

  Just at that moment there was a knock at the cabin door.

  ‘Come in!’

  ‘What did I tell you!’ said Streep. It was his turn to snigger.

  A man in a cap stood at the door, one of the employees of the wireless postal service on board the ship. He held out a tray on which there was a telegram.

  ‘It’s for me, I think’ I said. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘Well?’ said Streep after I had read it. ‘It’s from her, isn’t it? Was I right?’

  I was happy, I was so happy! I didn’t have any reservation, any regrets, in answering.

  ‘Yes, it’s from her!’

  XIX

  The little green islets, dark and blurred in the fading light, and bathed in the still waters of the sea roads, looked like upturned bowls of spinach. Night was falling rapidly.

  ‘So then?’ I asked Streep. ‘You’re adamant you still don’t want to see her?’

  It was really to put my mind at rest that I asked him this question for the last time. But deep down I thought he was absolutely right. A meeting between him and Alzire seemed to me to be the last thing anyone would want.

  ‘You’ve thought about it carefully then?’

  ‘Well I’ve told you so, haven’t I?’ he said. ‘It’s better for the two of you. It’s even better for the three of us.’

  ‘All right!’ I said. ‘I’ll do everything I can to make sure you don’t meet each other. For your part you should watch out as well. For example if she gets it into her head that she wants to see the tiger . . . ‘

  ‘That’s OK! You can be sure she will want to do that.’

  ‘Well, try to make sure . . . ‘

  ‘Not to get in your way? Of course I won’t! Perhaps I shall see you here or there, but in any case, you won’t see me, that I promise.’

  I was going to give him a last word of advice, but he had already gone. I was left alone, leaning on the railings, chain smoking, and watching the lights of the port and the town lighting up one after the other. A large warship was tied up a few hundred yards away. It stood out white against the gathering darkness. The air smelt of cooking oil and fuel.

  *

  Someone tapped me on the shoulder. To my surprise I saw two figures with their faces covered in masks of black satin.

  ‘Won’t you come with us?’ they asked.

  It was the captain and the chief steward of the Paul-Lecat. There was a big fancy-dress ball being held that evening at the famous Raffles Hotel, in honour of the officers from the Endymion, the cruiser I just mentioned.

  ‘No, Captain. You are too kind. But I am not invited, and besides . . . . ‘

  ‘That is a poor reason. When the governor invited me, he specifically said that he would like me to bring any of my passengers who I would like. So therefore . . . ‘

  ‘I really would prefer to spend the evening on board the Paul-Lecat’ I replied. ‘But may I say how touched I am . . . ‘

  ‘Not at all! Not at all! The pleasure is mine, I assure you. I wish you a good evening. Tomorrow you will have lunch at my table. You promise? Don’t forget!’

  *

  We had arrived in Singapore at about five o’clock in the afternoon, too late in any case to organise the unloading of a crate such as the one which contained the cage with my tiger inside it. But the Paul-Lecat wasn’t due to depart until the day after next, so there was no need for us to hurry. I didn’t even have to request the permission of the captain for Otto Streep and myself to spend an extra night on his ship. He himself suggested it to me. The Narkhunda, the steamship which was going to take us to Batavia and then on to Sydney, had left Colombo that same morning. So I had five days to wait in Singapore, five days which I would like to have known in advance what they might have in store, as if the matter had nothing to do with my own decision.

  I had replied to the telegram from Alzire. How could I do otherwise? It was a question of politeness, of courtesy. Besides, Otto Streep approved. In response I received three more telegrams from her, in which she told me how happy she was at the thought of seeing me again soon.

  As soon as the Paul-Lecat had tied up, an odd character in an orange turban, with all the mannerisms of a manservant in a big house, had come on board and made a great fuss asking for me. He was carrying a letter from Alzire. In it she explained, very simply, that out of consideration for her friend the governor, she could not avoid making an appearance at the ball that evening at the Raffles, but at about eleven o’clock she would excuse herself and come and find me, wherever I wished, on board the ship if necessary. In the event that I had already planned my evening, she would fully understand, and she would be at my disposal for the whole of the next day, either here or wherever suited me.

  I felt I had to show this letter to Otto Streep.

  ‘I never said that she was stupid,
’ was all he replied, while giving a long, lingering look at the beautiful, voluptuous, and elongated handwriting, a look in which it was impossible not to feel some emotion.

  ‘And if I may be indiscreet, what have you replied?’

  ‘That she can come when she wants. I won’t leave the Paul-Lecat this evening.’

  ‘She will be here at the time which she has stated. She has always been precision itself,’ he said.

  I knew that, and I thought it was a little bit childish of him that he should want to inform me of it.

  *

  Apart from one or two little things like that, I had no occasion during the voyage to reproach Otto Streep. He carried out his duties as a subordinate impeccably, albeit with a certain affectation, and he never came to pester me in first class, or tried to steer the conversation to the subject which one can guess, except when I expressly invited him to do so. One detail surprised me, and almost made me a bit jealous. It had nothing to do with Alzire, but rather it was the extraordinary authority which he exerted over Kublai. One could truly say that Streep was very close to him. On several occasions I saw him, I mean I actually saw him, manage the astonishing feat of caressing Kublai, or bullying him, as the need arose, and addressing him in an offhand, casual manner at which the monstrous creature seemed to shrink. Kublai neither ate nor drank except when Streep gave him express permission. On a simple command from Streep he took refuge in one half of the cage, when it was divided in two by the operation of the sliding partition in the middle, to allow for the other half to be cleaned.

  ‘Perhaps I’ll see you walking him on a lead,’ I said to Streep one day, with a hint of envy.

  He smiled. ‘We’re not at that stage yet, chief!’

  Chief! That was what we used to call Sanders! I wasn’t absolutely convinced that Otto Streep was very happy, or very sincere, in calling me the same.

  *

  Ten o’clock at night! Still one hour to wait, my God! I went back down to my cabin. This was the fourth or fifth time since nightfall that I had performed this little exercise. I say my cabin, but what ingratitude on my part! To do it justice, this was a genuine, exquisite, apartment. When I thought of our two bunk beds, mine and Sanders’, on the deadly roads of the Gobi, in our dreary and shaky old lorry! And now, this bathroom and toilet, this bedroom covered in wood panelling, this lounge with soft, discreet lighting! Even if I tried hard, I could not have found fault with the mute and smiling maitre d’hotel, to whom I had just given my orders. One fan out of two was working, one light out of three, and some magnificent, tall orchids seemed almost as tormented as my soul. In the corner, hardly visible, in case my beloved visitor should want them, were some of the fruits of France, some champagne, a bottle of old Bordeaux, and a fresh partridge.