by Lisa Jade
Someone grabs my arm and I jump.
“Sorry!”
Jensen’s voice floats across at me. He’s standing awkwardly behind me, a lopsided smile on his face. There are straps on his arms and goggles on his head, giving him a strange, insect-like look. I’m laughing before I can help myself. He puffs out his cheeks; but the irritation is hollow. He seems almost amused.
“Laugh it up, go ahead. I’ve been hard at work today. What have you been doing?”
I shrug.
“I was at the river. What are you working on?”
Suddenly his face is filled with passion and joy – the excitement of sharing his interest with someone else. He clearly doesn’t get asked all that much.
“I’m installing cameras around Thorne. We’ve already hacked into the existing ones plus a ton of Hoverbots, but the three leaders are secretive. So we’ve been trying to sneak into locked-out areas and install hidden cameras there.”
“I didn’t know you could do that.”
“Yep. The key to bringing the Cull to a stop is information. We’ve not yet been able to hack into the leader’s mainframe, but we can monitor practically everything that happens outside each of the three leaders’ buildings.”
Somehow, I’ve been having so much fun that I forgot about the low key battle raging just outside these walls. Jensen pushes on, eager to have an audience for his speech.
“Each leader has their own tower,” he explains, “with ridiculous security. We have theories on how to get in but so far, it’s too risky. So we just monitor them for now.”
“So the straps and goggles…”
“I’m about to head out to install a new camera. It’s a fairly quiet area from what I can tell, so it’s fairly low risk, but I need help. Specifically, I need manpower.”
“And that means me?”
“I hope so. I need someone to help with heavy lifting, and everyone’s busy. You’re kinda strong, aren’t you?”
“I suppose.”
“Good. Pan, you don’t mind if I borrow her for a couple of hours, do you?”
I glance at Pan, expecting her to refuse. She’s supposed to be looking after me, right? I shouldn’t go sneaking off without her. But to my surprise, she nods.
“It’s fine with me. But grab a jacket before you go, and keep the hood up. I know it’s getting dark soon, but don’t risk it. I don’t think we’re ready to have her face known just yet.”
“Of course. We’ll leave the Hoverbots here, too. Don’t want them to be spotted. You coming?”
With that Jensen holds out an arm, and though I’d really rather do anything else, I take it.
The streets are quiet by the time we leave. There’s a warm, reddish glow seeping its way between the buildings as the sun sets overhead – but it’s too early for lights, so everything’s bathed in shadow. I can almost hear the click and buzz of the floodlights turning on back home.
“So where is this place?” I ask. He simply reaches up and pulls my hood further over my face.
“Don’t talk yet. Just follow me, and be quick.”
He glances out of the side street and darts across the road with expert precision, so fast that if I hadn’t been watching, I may not have noticed. He tugs his goggles from his head and stuffs them into his pocket, blending seamlessly with any other randomer on the street. I follow suit, though my movements are far less delicate. Unlike Jensen, there’s no way for me to blend in. Any onlookers will be drawn to me instantly; my short, stocky form and tanned skin is a far cry from anything they’ve seen before. But with my face sufficiently covered, I’m not too concerned.
As we walk, I notice that the people around us seem… different from before. They’re few and far between, but they act strangely, compared to how they do in the day. Some stumble around on the pavement, or laugh a little too loudly. Two figures are curled up in a doorway, their faces pressed together. I inhale deeply; the stench of alcohol and unwashed bodies floods over me.
What was it that Eagen told me, all that time ago? People in the city are strange. When they have nothing to do, people go a little crazy.
Jensen must notice my discomfort, though, because he allows himself to fall a half-step back, coming into line with my steps. There’s no eye contact between us, nothing that would suggest we know each other. But it’s enough to settle my racing heart. It’s strange, but my apparent trepidation seems to be enough to make him warm towards me. That suspicion’s not quite gone, but he seems to be softening.
Finally, we come to a strange, round building. There are signs everywhere that I can’t quite read, but judging by the look of the suited men strolling outside, it’s somewhere important.
“Follow me,” whispers Jensen, his hand locking around my wrist. I follow obediently and soon we arrive at the rear of the building. Here it’s dark and silent, and the general bustle at the front of the building is muffled.
He points at one of the gates. They’re huge and white, made of painted metal. They remind me of the heavy gates back at the Mill. The same ones that clanged shut behind me as I left with the cart. That noise – the one that had felt so inescapably final.
“This is why I brought you. The gates are way too heavy for one person to move, but I need to get inside to install the camera.”
That’s it? He brought me all this way just to open a gate? Irritation flares in me, but I push it aside. I’ll do it, but only so we can go back.
The gate squeals as we move it, sending vibrations through the air around us. Jensen winces; I can’t help but feel like he’s not used to being out here on his own.
“How long have you been doing this?” I ask. I’m not really all that curious, but as his shoulders relax, I know it helps him to talk about it.
“I’ve been here since the beginning. I was just a kid, really – but I’m a fast learner. Figured out how to handle the computer systems.”
“What about your parents?”
We squeeze through the gap and head slowly down the darkened alley, and towards the shadowed building. Jensen hesitates for a moment before replying – suddenly, I’ve overstepped the boundary and asked him something he doesn’t want to talk about.
“I don’t know where they are anymore,” he eventually admits, “I fell in with Jay and the others when I was younger, and they were against it. Our little group is considered ‘bad company’ by most in Thorne, even if they agree with what we’re trying to achieve.”
He waves towards a particularly large, metal bin and I step forward, leaning my shoulder against it and pushing. It doesn’t budge. He doesn’t even notice.
“Anyway, when I went to my first protest with the others, my parents were furious. They disowned me that day. Never spoke to me again. I moved away from them and never bothered again.”
“Do you miss them?”
I push harder this time, finally feeling the wheels give way. Behind me, Jensen clicks his tongue.
“I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like it’d be nice to see them again, but it’s not worth it. I don’t think I could stand to be around people like that anymore.”
The bin moves smoothly now, allowing me to shuffle it over to where he points. He jumps on top of it, pulling some equipment from his pockets – including a tiny, metallic camera. As he works, I stand watch, though there’s really no point. Nobody’s around.
But questions still linger in the air between us, still hang from my tongue.
“What’s it like? Living in the city, I mean?”
He sighs, clearly wishing that I hadn’t asked.
“It’s hard to explain. I make it seem bad because I’m jaded about the whole thing, but there are good things, too. Most of the time, it’s amazing. We have all the time in the world and everything we could possibly need. People spend their whole lives working towards their own goals, instead of focussing on their responsibilities. Here, you can get away with doing nearly anything – as long as you find it fun.”
“That doesn’t sound too ba
d.”
“It’s not. Even the Cull doesn’t seem too bad once you consider the alternative. It’s like living in a bubble. Everything looks distorted and wrong, but it doesn’t matter. Because what you can see is pretty and what’s outside the bubble might not look so nice. Once you burst it and see what’s really going on, there’s no way of putting it back again.”
With that he falls silent, and it’s obvious he’s done talking. I try to imagine what his family are like – as intelligent as him, I’d expect. Only less committed, less brave. Happy to look through their bubble just so long as it means avoiding hardship.
Something stirs in my chest. I hadn’t expected to feel sad about this. A word comes to mind; empathy. I know what that is, what it’s supposed to mean, but I never really cared about it. My life’s been an endless list of things to be done, and those things take up so much time that there’s never been any chance to think about something like ‘understanding’ other people. I didn’t understand Kane. I don’t even think I understood Nel all that much.
I stand in silence until he finally hops down from the bin.
“All done?”
“All done. Now, I can view this spot from my room in the Atrium.”
“But, if this spot’s quiet, then why do you need it?”
He chuckles.
“You never know. This is a secure back entrance. Anything could happen back here.”
I don’t challenge him on that. I set to work pushing the bin back to where it needs to be. As I slide it back into place, though, something cold drips onto my arm.
“Looks like rain,” says Jensen, shuddering. I glance up and sure enough, the sky is darkening overhead. The sunset is well and truly gone now, leaving us in darkness.
“Should we head back?” I ask, ignoring that little part of me that would much rather wander around. He nods.
“Yeah. We’d better.”
As we approach the gate, the rain begins to fall more heavily. It bounces off the ground, obscuring my vision. Water soaks through my hood and hair, dripping down into my eyes – Jensen lets out a few irate grunts as he wipes at his glasses, but I’m used to it. I’m used to finding loose potatoes in knee-deep mud with rain blurring everything around me. Used to chopping wood in a torrential downpour, even though it makes the wooden axe handle slippery under my touch.
So I usher him through the gap in the gates, then gather my strength to push it shut. It catches. The squeal is louder this time, almost deafening. Jensen’s eyes widen.
“Damn! Hurry up, hurry up!”
Suddenly, I can hear it. The distant sound of barking dogs and questioning yells. Further down the alleyway, white lights swing – searchlights, looking for the intruders. How did the City Guard snap into action so quickly?
Jensen jumps up next to me and together we slam the gate shut. Then his hand is in mine, and before I know it we’re running. We follow the route we came from, but then skid to a stop. I wonder why and open my mouth to ask, but then I see lights coming from that direction, too.
“This way!”
He pulls my arm so hard I wince, but there’s no time to complain. I allow him to lead me down a different alleyway. This one’s so narrow that we can’t run side by side, so he pushes me ahead.
“Keep running!”
I obey immediately, and when I glance back he’s running full pelt, head down as though he’s doing his utmost to ignore the encroaching lights. In the distance, I can hear yelling. They know we’re here.
Wait – who are they? Guards? Something to do with the three leaders? Whoever they are and whatever they want with us, it hits some deep-rooted fear in my chest. My heart is in my throat. I don’t know what they’ll do if they catch us, and I don’t want to find out.
Jensen yelps behind me, slipping on the wet floor. He rolls forward, promptly and painfully colliding with a trash can. I skid to a stop, but he’s already sitting up. He clutches at his leg and yelps. There’s undeniable terror in his eyes.
“Come on, we have to go!” I cry.
“Y-you go. Back to the others.”
“What? No!”
The voices are louder now. There are shadows encroaching on the edges of my vision. They’re still some way off – but now, they know we’re here. Jensen cringes.
“You know the way back, Ada. Just go!”
My blood runs cold. Then, a split second later, it’s hot again – so hot it feels like it could burst from my clenched fists.
“I am not Ada!” I snarl, “I’m Noah, and you’d better use my name when you talk to me, got that? Now put your arms up.”
I don’t give him chance to do as he’s told. In an instant I’ve scooped him up and thrown him over one shoulder. Jensen screams in protest, but I don’t care. He’s tall but skinny, his weight nothing compared to things I’ve hauled before.
I take off at a dead sprint.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
I run so hard and fast that my vision begins to blur. The rain doesn’t help, either, turning everything into a strange blackness that’s broken by strobes of passing light. My hood’s slipping down and I’m eating my own hair – but the voices are quieter now, the lights gone from my sight.
“Noah, slow down!” Jensen croaks in my ear, “they’re gone, we got away.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do. Come on, stop in an alleyway.”
I don’t want to. My heart’s still pounding in a way I’ve never felt before, and there’s something boiling in my veins. Adrenaline, perhaps? I don’t know. But it’s painful and scary at the same time. It takes more effort than I’d expected to finally slow to a stop, dropping Jensen unceremoniously onto the ground at the entrance of an alleyway. I can barely breathe, so I sit down next to him and try to gulp down what little air I can get.
I’m still tense, but as I listen to the silence, I hear nothing. No sirens, no yelling. Nobody’s coming after us. Jensen’s breathless too for some reason, and it’s only now that I see how puffy his leg is. I’ve seen breaks and sprains before. They’re unremarkable, basic as far as injuries go – but I know from experience that they hurt like a bitch.
Still, as he meets my eyes, something builds in me. It pushes up from my stomach and bursts out through my mouth. Laughter.
Why am I laughing? This isn’t funny. He’s hurt. We’re stuck in an alleyway in who-knows-where. They’re still looking for us. There’s nothing funny about this at all. So why am I emitting high-pitched, hiccupping laughter, like some kind of maniac?
He stares at me, and I half expect him to be angry. Instead, he laughs, too. It’s low and throaty and seems strangely mismatched with my own.
“W-why are you laughing?” he chuckles. I shake my head.
“This… this is ridiculous! What was that?!”
Suddenly, he’s sobered up. Those dark eyes are fixed on me, his expression unreadable.
“That was… intense. I’m surprised with how well you kept it together.”
“I didn’t.”
“You saved me back there.”
I bite back on another bout of laughter, and solemnly shake my head.
“I panicked. I’m not even sure what happened.”
“The Guards. They’re security for the city, especially around the important buildings. Someone must have heard the gate.”
“What would they have done if they’d caught up to us?”
He says nothing, so I decide not to push for an answer.
“How is your leg?” I ask, trying to inject a little sympathy into my voice.
“It’ll be fine. I think it’s just sprained. A few days and I’ll be good to go. It’s more my pride that’s wounded.”
“Huh?”
“I brought you out here to help me out,” he smiles, “and instead, you carry me like a baby. It’s pretty embarrassing.”
“Oh. Well, if you want, we won’t tell the others about that bit.”
Jensen’s trying to stand now. He touches one foot to the ground
and yelps – I tuck my shoulder under his arm and hold him up.
“Don’t be silly,” he tells me, “I’m telling them everything. Jay especially will need to know.”
“Oh, right. He’s your leader, isn’t he? It makes sense. He needs to know that you got hurt.”
“That’s… not the only reason.”
Jensen was right, as it turns out. Pan gives him a tentative once-over and declares his ankle to be badly sprained and nothing more. He’s visibly relieved, and I can see why – broken bones are a pain to recover from. As she binds him up, she scolds him for his recklessness. I want to jump in, to defend him, but every time I open my mouth I’m reminded of how little I understand. It’s not my right to comment.
“This was supposed to be routine.”
I’m suddenly aware of Jay standing next to me. He doesn’t look my way but his voice is low, like it’s intended for only me. A quick glance confirms it.
“Things got out of control,” I say simply.
“From what I hear, you managed to keep calm long enough to escape.”
“Not really. I was scared, so I started running.”
That must be the first time in a while that I’ve admitted to being scared. Oddly, it doesn’t feel as bad as I’d have expected.
“Well, here’s something exciting.”
He claps me on the back, a warm, confident motion that makes my cheeks burn with joy.
“You’ve broken your first law. You’re a criminal, now. Enjoy it.”
My chest swells with pride, but inwardly, I’m screaming.
What have I done?!
Pan falls asleep before I do, curled tightly into a ball. The chaos of the day has left everyone exhausted – but the adrenaline in my veins is still there. I feel like I could sleep for a week, and yet the thought of falling back onto the pillows leaves me unnerved. The room is dark around me, and if not for the soft glow of Pan’s fairy lights, I’d feel frightened of the shadows.