The District Nurse

by Annie Groves

  Mattie gave a small sniff, and pulled back so that she could look at her husband. ‘Course we have.’ She paused. ‘I don’t know, Lennie, it’s so hard to tell what’s for the best. I only want Gillian to be safe, you know that. I talked about it with Kath too – there’s only her to protect Brian, we can’t rely on that scumbag Ray to do anything.’

  ‘No, it fair made my blood boil when you told me what he done to her,’ said Lennie with feeling.

  ‘Well, we thought maybe we should both go and take our babies somewhere. But what if something was to happen to Ma once we’d gone? Who would I come back to?’ Mattie’s face crinkled with distress at the very idea. ‘We weighed it up and decided we’d take our chances here. Look, we got the shelter now. And this room’s only got the one window facing the garden, it’s sheltered, and we can all share the cooking and everything …’ She trailed off. ‘It’s like I said, we don’t know for certain, but we reckon it’s best to stay. At least for now.’

  Lennie regarded his wife, his heart turning over that she’d had to face such a decision on her own without him there to support her. He knew her family were close and would do anything for them, but sometimes he found it hard to be away from her even though it was for the best of reasons. He pulled her to him again and could feel her heart beat through her thin cotton blouse. ‘You got to do what you think is right,’ he said, ‘but if you change your mind, you’ll tell me, won’t you? I just want to know you’re safe. I couldn’t bear it if anything happened to Gillian and you.’

  Billy Reilly sat on the barstool and stared morosely into his pint. He’d never been one for lunchtime drinking but today was the exception. The rest of the Duke’s Arms was nearly empty, apart from a few older hardened drinkers, and he knew it would be because men of his age would be preparing to enlist or maybe had already done so. Harry had already gone. They’d shared a pint in here only two nights ago to send him on his way. Billy had confided in his old mate what he intended to do.

  ‘I fancy my chances in the army too,’ he said. ‘I just been listening to what Lennie was saying and it sounds like a grand life. I know I won’t be doing stuff like you, what with the boxing and everything, but I reckon I could do my bit that way.’

  Harry had slapped him on the back. ‘Good for you, Billy. But you could stay on at the docks, couldn’t you? They’ll need them to keep going.’

  Billy had shaken his head. ‘Yeah, I could, but so could lots of the old blokes. They don’t need me there as much as the army does. New blood and all that.’ He’d flexed his biceps, which weren’t as impressive as Harry’s, but were still testament to the heavy work he did, day in, day out.

  Now Billy groaned and raised his glass. He’d been full of optimistic bravado, so keen to join up as all his friends were doing. He’d had secret hopes of coming home a hero. Look at the way everyone was all over Lennie, and he hadn’t even seen any fighting yet. But now he knew his dreams were finished before they’d started. He drained his glass and waved at the barman to order another.

  He realised he was swaying a bit and took his fresh pint over to a table. He didn’t want to fall off his stool and be subject to even more ridicule than he was sure he’d receive once the news got out. The polished wood of the table’s surface reflected the outline of his upper body as he slumped in utter dejection, gazing miserably out of the window to the street beyond. Hardly any kids about – strange for a weekend, but he supposed they’d all gone off to Hertfordshire, or Bedfordshire, or wherever the trains had taken them. Poor little mites, separated from their parents and all they knew.

  ‘Billy! What are you doing in here this time of day?’

  Billy blearily looked up. Someone was striding towards him. It was Joe. Billy groaned. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy Joe’s company – usually they got on like a house on fire. But Joe was about to go off and join the navy, where they’d no doubt be delighted to make full use of someone who everybody knew had a good brain. He’d be a hero soon too. That just left Billy on his own, with never a chance to make his mark.

  ‘All right, Joe?’ he managed.

  Joe pulled out a wooden stool and sank down on it. Even at this level, he towered over Billy. ‘Don’t usually see you in here this early,’ Joe commented.

  Billy grunted. ‘I could say the same for you. Thought you usually went to Percy’s café this time of the week.’

  Joe nodded. ‘I do. I’m on my way there now – I promised Alice I’d transfer my library subscription over to her and I said I’d see her there. But I was passing by and thought I saw you through the window. So I dropped in to see how you were. How did it go yesterday?’

  Billy looked at his old friend steadily for a moment and then turned away. He didn’t know if he could bear the shame of admitting what had happened at the recruiting office. Yet he didn’t see how he could get out of such a direct question, and besides, people were bound to find out one way or another. It might as well be Joe who he told first. He was probably the kindest and most understanding of their gang of friends. All the same, his shoulders sagged in defeat as he prepared to confess.

  ‘I didn’t get in,’ he muttered, still not meeting Joe’s eyes.

  Joe grimaced. ‘What do you mean, you didn’t get in? Fit fellow like you, I’d have thought they’d have snapped you up straight away.’

  ‘Well they didn’t.’ Billy rubbed his hand over his face. Then he turned back to Joe. ‘Failed the medical, didn’t I?’

  ‘You?’ asked Joe in astonishment. ‘But you’re fit as a flea, you never have days off sick, you’re lifting heavy goods down the warehouse day in, day out—’

  ‘Don’t make no difference,’ Billy cut in. ‘It’s not my lack of strength that’s the problem. It’s me feet. I got flat feet.’

  ‘Oh.’ Joe didn’t know what to say. ‘That makes a difference, does it? I never thought about it …’

  ‘Seems like it does,’ Billy said dully. ‘I can’t march, apparently. I’ll hold everyone back. You’d have thought I could have done other stuff, you don’t need your feet to fire a gun, but they weren’t having it. I argued like mad but they didn’t like that. They sent me packing.’

  ‘Billy, I’m sorry to hear that.’ Joe realised what a devastating blow this would be for his mate. ‘You can carry on down the docks though, can’t you? They’ll need you there.’

  ‘That’s just what me ma said,’ snapped Billy.

  ‘All right, I was just saying.’ Joe leant back.

  ‘No, I’m not having a go, it’s just that if I’d wanted to stay on the docks, I wouldn’t have bothered going to enlist,’ said Billy, cross with himself that he’d antagonised his friend but unable to stop himself. ‘They all know I was going to do it and now, on Monday morning, they’ll start asking and I’ll have to tell them what’s wrong. I’m useless, a dud, all cos of my stupid feet.’

  Joe patted him on the shoulder. ‘Don’t take on, Bill. It doesn’t make you useless, just that you can’t be in the army. You could do things at home.’

  ‘Like what,’ Billy said, looking down at his hated feet.

  ‘Dad says they’ll need many more ARP wardens, and they can’t all be old gaffers. They’ll have to lift casualties and move around fast if it comes to it. Or fire watching – we know the docks and round here will be a target if it comes to it.’

  ‘Suppose so.’

  ‘It’s true, I’m not making it up to make you feel better.’ Joe got to his feet. ‘Sorry, Bill, I got to go.’

  Billy looked up at his tall friend as he stood. ‘Quite right, can’t keep the lovely Alice waiting.’

  ‘It’s not like that,’ Joe said, slightly embarrassed, buttoning his coat.

  Billy scoffed, but knew there was no point in arguing. He didn’t really want to pick a fight, but if Joe couldn’t see a good thing when it was right in front of him, then maybe there was something wrong with his brain after all. Still, that was their lookout.

  Joe did up his last button. ‘And have a think ab
out what I said, Billy. Dad’s got all the details. They could use someone like you.’

  Billy sighed. Being an ARP warden didn’t have the glamour of a fighter returning from the front line and was unlikely to win him any female attention, but it might be better than nothing. ‘All right, Joe,’ he promised. ‘I’ll do that.’

  ‘Sorry I’m a bit late.’ Joe hated not turning up on time and had rushed the short distance from pub to café, only to find that Alice had got there before him anyway. She was seated at a table in the corner by the window, watching the world go by, a steaming mug of tea in front of her. She was wearing a bright patterned scarf he didn’t think he’d seen before, but then again, he knew he didn’t always notice such details. Mattie was always teasing him that he never spotted when she’d made something new on their old Singer sewing machine.

  Alice looked up and smiled. ‘Don’t worry, I haven’t been here long,’ she said, tucking a wave of blonde hair behind her ear. ‘I haven’t ordered anything to eat, I thought I’d wait for you.’

  Joe settled in the seat opposite Alice as Percy came over, apron tied tightly as ever around his waist.

  ‘Same as last time?’ Joe asked, his mouth suddenly dry as Alice’s clear blue eyes held his own. He wondered if it was the scarf she was wearing that brought out their colour so vividly.

  ‘Of course.’ Alice grinned broadly, not aware of his slight discomposure. ‘I’ve been looking forward to it all morning.’ She raised her eyebrows. ‘I wonder what they’ll feed you in the Royal Navy?’

  Joe shrugged, getting a grip on himself. ‘Whatever they can get hold of, I should think. I get the feeling we’ll be kept so busy that we’ll be grateful for anything they put in front of us.’ He lined up the HP Sauce in readiness, and Alice immediately moved the mustard pot closer to her.

  ‘Yes, I feel like that sometimes when I get back from my rounds,’ she said. ‘I could eat a horse if I’ve been cycling from one end of the district to the other, going to and fro all day.’

  ‘Isn’t it quieter now that lots of the kiddies have been evacuated?’ Joe wondered.

  ‘You’d think so, but several of the ones who haven’t left have gone down with whooping cough, which has kept us busy. I’ve spent more time teaching the mothers about avoiding dehydration than anything else these past few days, and telling all the other members of the family to wash their hands properly. Never easy when you don’t have a tap inside the house.’

  ‘No, I suppose not.’ Joe shook his head. ‘I can’t really remember what it was like in our house before Dad got the water sorted out. We’ve always been lucky.’

  ‘Me too,’ Alice said. ‘It wasn’t until I started doing my Queen’s Nurse training that I saw for myself the conditions some families have to cope with. Oh look, here come the sandwiches.’

  Joe turned and caught the salty aroma of sizzling bacon, which made his mouth water. ‘This will pep you up,’ he said, eyes alight.

  Both of them immediately set about demolishing the delicious sandwiches, Joe adding sauce to his, Alice a generous dollop of mustard. As she ate, she watched as a lock of Joe’s neatly styled brown hair had slipped down over his eye and he unconsciously pushed it back into place again. It always did that, she thought, no matter how the rest of his tidy, Brylcreemed hair behaved. It made him seem boyish, in contrast to his usual steady-as-a-rock maturity.

  Joe looked up, aware of her scrutiny. ‘What are you looking at? Has a fly landed on my bonce or something?’

  Alice laughed, ‘No, you aren’t attracting flies yet.’ His eyes shone in amusement at her and for a moment the last thing on Alice’s mind was her bacon sandwich.

  ‘Ah, that’s better.’ Joe sat back in his seat and pushed the empty plate away as they finished. ‘Now I feel ready for anything. Whatever the navy can throw at me, you name it.’

  Alice pushed away her own plate with a sigh of satisfaction. ‘What about something as difficult as transferring a library subscription? Did you bring the form?’

  ‘Of course.’ Joe reached inside his jacket pocket and brought out a sheet of paper and a pen. ‘I’ve signed it already so you just have to put in your details and sign it. Then you take it back to the library and you’re ready to go. Usually they’d want us to go together, but I explained I’d enlisted and wouldn’t be able to do it, so they understood.’

  ‘I see,’ said Alice, casting her eyes over the form. It struck her how many changes there were going to be because of the war. She’d been prepared for the major disruptions – the children being evacuated, young men joining up – but now saw that the war would affect every single aspect of their lives, even down to this small matter of altering a library subscription. ‘It’s very kind of you to do this, Joe. I do appreciate it.’

  ‘Think nothing of it,’ he said, his eyes bright. ‘No one in my family would have been interested, and it’ll just go to waste if I’m away. I know you’ll make good use of it.’ He paused. ‘I’ll probably be gone by the time you go to see them and make it official.’

  Alice met his gaze and held it. ‘You’re off that soon?’

  He nodded. ‘Wednesday this week. I only heard this morning, but that’s when I’m to report for my initial training. I’m going down to Portsmouth.’

  ‘Oh.’ Alice didn’t know how she felt about that. It suddenly seemed very soon, and having an actual day made it real. Somehow Joe had become part of the fabric of her life, their little get-togethers were now something she actively looked forward to, anticipated even. He’d become a good friend. ‘Well, it’ll be good to be by the sea, won’t it? Fresh air – fresher than Dalston, that’s for sure.’ She felt she had to sound extra cheerful.

  ‘I expect I’ll see rather a lot of the sea,’ he replied wryly. ‘Don’t you miss it? You’re from Liverpool, aren’t you?’

  Alice sighed in acknowledgement. ‘Yes, I do, but I knew that’s what I’d have to give up to do my training down here. I miss the way the air tastes salty when the wind is blowing from the west, and the sound of the seabirds, that sort of thing. But I like it round here too.’

  ‘Best place in England,’ said Joe staunchly. ‘I know I’m biased but you can’t beat round here. I’m glad you’ve settled into the area. I’ll miss it, I expect, but then they’re bound to give me leave so I can come back and check how Ma and the rest of them are getting on, and what changes there are around the place.’

  ‘All the Anderson shelters,’ Alice suggested.

  ‘Yes, ours is all kitted out now,’ Joe said. ‘Ma and Maisie have got it as comfortable as they can – they’d have family photos up on the walls given half a chance. But it won’t all be about the war, will it? I mean, they’re still planning to open that new cinema up in Clapton, war or no war. Not that it will be of any interest to you, though.’

  Alice blinked in surprise. ‘Won’t it? Why not?’

  ‘Well, I know you don’t like the cinema,’ Joe replied.

  ‘Really? Who told you that?’ Alice was confused.

  ‘You did. You said you weren’t interested in going to see Jamaica Inn and preferred to read the book.’ It was Joe’s turn to look baffled. ‘Don’t you remember? It’s how we got talking about the library – come on, it wasn’t that long ago. Have you changed your mind?’

  Alice frowned and then began to laugh. ‘Oh no, I see now. You’ve got the wrong end of the stick. I didn’t want to go to the cinema then because I’d have been a proper gooseberry with Edie and Harry. Talk about being surplus to requirements. No, I thought I’d better keep out of the way as I could tell even then how much she liked him.’ She paused. ‘That was all it was. Otherwise I like the cinema very much, I just don’t get the chance to go very often.’

  Joe shook his head in exasperation at his own silly misunderstanding. ‘I did wonder. I’d never met anyone who didn’t like the movies. Well, there you are. I’m not a postman and you’re not a stuck-up nurse.’

  ‘No, I’m not,’ said Alice very decisively.

&n
bsp; ‘In that case, maybe you’d care to try out the Clapton Ritz with me once it is open, when I have leave?’ Joe asked.

  Alice almost gasped. Was Joe asking to walk out with her? But then she told herself that his expression hadn’t changed, that he was teasing her, in the way he and Harry teased Mattie all the time. There was nothing else behind his invitation. There couldn’t be, could there? All the same, she detected a warmth creep up her cheek. Surely it wasn’t a blush?

  ‘Yes, all right,’ she said, the words were out of her mouth before she had time to stop them. ‘That would be lovely.’

  ‘It’ll be something to look forward to when those seabirds wake me up with their screeching every morning,’ he said, and again she wondered if she was mishearing the intention behind his words.

  They both hovered for a moment, seemingly reluctant to say goodbye, but it was Joe who spoke first. ‘I suppose I’d better get going, as I’ve a thousand things to do before Wednesday. Ma will need me back, so I had best be off.’

  ‘Of course.’ She stood and reached for her coat, but he got there first and helped her into it. She caught the warmth of his arm for a fleeting moment, and for a second wondered what it would be like to extend that brief touch, but told herself to stop reading too much into everything. He was just being polite, as she’d come to expect of him. They made their way to the café door.

  ‘Well, I’m heading this way today,’ Joe said, inclining his head away from the direction of the nurses’ home.

  ‘Then, goodbye for now,’ Alice said, feeling a little caught on the hop at the speed of his departure. ‘I hope your training goes well.’ She smiled brightly up at him, hiding a little tremor of fear that he might be going into danger already. ‘Promise me you’ll look after yourself, Joe.’

  ‘I will, don’t you worry, and you do the same.’ Then, before she could stop him, he swiftly bent forward, cupping her elbow in his hand, and gave her a light peck on the cheek. Alice caught the aroma of sandalwood and Pears soap as he leaned in towards her. ‘Enjoy the library books,’ he said as he walked away, giving her a wave, and then disappearing into the press of people out on a busy Saturday lunchtime.