by Erin Trejo
“Dax is right. Stryker wouldn’t want us standin’ around some goddamn hole. He’d want us standin’ proud of who we’ve become. The bonds that have been made. We will miss the shit outta him, but we will move forward. He took his place as a member of this club, of this family. He knew the risks involved, much like we all do. The only thing left to say right now is this…. We fuckin’ love you, Stryker. You were our brother, our friend. You will forever be missed but not forgotten. Your death wasn’t for nothin’, brother,” Bomber says.
The guys all step forward, grabbing a handful of dirt. We take turns as we toss it on top of his casket.
This is our final piece of the puzzle of life. We will all end up here eventually.
Chapter 74
Laura
The clubhouse is like a mad house. I have never seen so many people in one place. There are so many different clubs in here right now.
“This is crazy,” Shannon whispers in my ear. I nod my head as I look around for Dax.
“I don’t know why there are so many of them.” I glance over at Shannon but she just shrugs.
“Who the hell knows with them,” she says. That is true. They don’t look to be in a bad mood, so I can only assume this is a happy visit.
“Jesus. Get off work to come home to this,” Aubrie says as she makes her way over to us. I throw my arm around her shoulders, pulling her into my side.
“Yeah. We are trying to figure out what the fuck is happening.” I look at her, but she clearly has no idea either.
“Couldn’t say. Micah didn’t say anything to me.” She yawns before she says, “I’m going to take a shower. If it’s something good, come get me.” I nod my head as my eyes keep scanning the room.
I finally see Dax with a giant grin on his face and Cory curled up in his arms. It makes my heart swell to see how much he loves being a dad.
I never thought I’d see it, but that man is the best. I don’t think any other man could top that. Dax has taken to being a dad since the day he found out I was pregnant.
His eyes find mine before he grins bigger. The light that radiates off that man amazes me every time I see it.
He moves toward me slowly. His eyes never leave mine until Trinity steps up to him. He passes Cory off to her before making his way toward me again.
He doesn’t speak. He wraps his arms around my waist and lifts me into the air. I laugh when he spins me around once before bringing me back down.
“What has you so happy?” I ask him before he kisses me.
When he pulls back, his face has turned serious.
“A few things…. We’re patchin’ in a new Road Captain today. That’s somethin’ to celebrate, Stryker would want that.” I nod as his eyes slowly move over my face. “God, you’re so beautiful. Do you know that the first time I saw your eyes, I was lost?” My heart leaps in my chest at his words.
“You were looking at my eyes. Tell the truth,” I tease him.
“Ok, I saw your ass first. I was like good goddamn, that is one curvy woman. I wanted to taste that sweet ass.” He chuckles making me laugh. “You know what else has me smilin’ today?” he asks me.
I shake my head having no clue whatsoever.
Dax leans down, pressing his lips to my ear.
“It’s been six weeks.”
Chapter 75
Dax
“Fuck me!” I growl as Laura rides me like her life depends on it.
“Dax!” Her voice is scratchy and rough. Damn, I love it!
“Come on, darlin’. I know those thick thighs move faster than that!” Slapping my hand on her thigh she picks up speed. “Just like that.” I raise my hips to meet her. Shit, six fucking weeks of waiting for this. I can’t believe I even lived through that. Six weeks is a long goddamn time.
Laura bounces on my dick as I watch her tits flop up and down. Ain’t no wonder my son loves those things. Shit, look at them move.
I reach up and toy with her nipples. She wants to stop me, but I keep bucking my hips and there’s nothing she can do. She can barely hold on without busting her load all over me.
I tweak her nipples harder as her back arches. Milk starts to squirt from her tits onto my chest.
“Holy shit! Dinner and a show!” Laura stops moving when I say that. She looks down and is completely pissed with me.
“Goddamn, Dax! Why did you do that!” She swats my hand away from her but I sit up quickly, pulling her chest against mine.
“Those are my milk makers. I can play with them whenever I want. In fact, I wanna see what it is your feedin’ my boy.” I dip my head, running my tongue along her neck before stopping on her tit.
“Don’t you dare, Dax,” she warns me. I don’t take orders from this woman.
I wiggle my eyebrows, leaning down lower and suck her nipple into my mouth. Biting just a little to feel her pussy clench around me, the milk sprays into my mouth.
She was right. Bad fucking idea. BAD. I choke and gag, pulling my head back.
“What the fuck is that!” I gag with my mouth open. That has to be the worst shit I’ve ever tasted in my life. What the hell is wrong with people feeding their kids that!
“It’s not for you, Dax!” Laura laughs.
“We’re goin’ back to formula. That is just… I don’t think I even have a word for that shit. I ain’t even horny anymore. That shit just left my dick limp.” That is the truth, too. That has ruined me.
Laura starts to move her hips and I find out that was all in my head. I’m still horny as fuck.
“You don’t feel limp.” She looks at me. She licks her lips before leaning closer to my face.
“In fact, it feels rock, fucking hard. Are you going to fuck me or cry over a little tittie milk?” Damn, her dirty mouth is perfect.
I lift her quickly, tossing her to the bed on her stomach. I move behind her, lifting her ass in the air, I slam into her ruthlessly.
Her sweet, round ass, bounces with every thrust I’m serving, only to make me that much harder. I grip her hips in my hands yanking her back against me as she screams my name.
When she clenches around me, I lose it. I explode inside of her as she falls over the edge with me.
I lay my head on her back, catching my breath.
“I think I just put like eight babies in there right now.” Laura giggles before I slide out of her and drop onto the bed.
I pull her head to my chest where she always lies.
“I love you, Dax.”
Chapter 76
Laura
“Cheryl! You are so nasty!” I laugh as I walk down the hallway. I check my notes once more before stopping off in Mr. Carter’s room.
“How are you doing, Mr. Carter?” I ask with a smile on my face. He’s new to our floor, but something about his eyes seems familiar.
“I’m alive today. That means nothing for tomorrow,” he says. His voice is strained. I know there’s more that he isn’t saying, but that’s not my concern.
“I don’t plan on letting you die on my shift if that makes it any better,” I say with a wink. He gives me a smile before I check his IV’s.
“Can I ask you something?” he says, pulling my attention.
“Of course, you can,” I say with a smile. That’s what I’m here for.
“Would you judge someone based on their past?” That’s a strange question. I shake my head, knowing that I can’t do that. I wouldn’t want anyone judging me based on mine.
“No, sir. I’ve done things in mine that I’m not proud of. What kind of person would I be if I did that? We all have a past, and sometimes we aren’t proud of it. It’s what we make of our future that counts.” His eyes fill with tears and I wonder where this is going.
“May I tell you a story?” he asks. I nod as I lean against his bed and listen.
“I was married once. We had a beautiful, little boy. He was perfect. We were happy. As he got older he became ill. We didn’t know what was wrong with him. His mother left me. She didn’t want to be
bothered with him or anything that was going on. I tried to take care of him myself. I became sick years after he did. I wanted to go before him. We both had cancer. How ironic is that? I did the best that I could for him—but when it became too much—I had to let him go. I was told he died in this very hospital,” he says. That is the saddest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.
“I’m so sorry. That had to have been hard for you to let him go,” I say with tears filling my eyes.
“It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. He was my child and I let him go. I left him alone to die on his own. To take his final breath alone. I knew he was worse than me and I couldn’t find it in me to watch him go before I did.” Oh, my God. My heart is breaking in my chest.
“What was his name?” I ask. The man pulls his eyes to mine and all the air is sucked from the room.
“Cory.”
Chapter 77
Dax
“You gonna beat that fuckin’ bag right off the hook?” Kane says as he watches me. I’ve been taking out my frustrations on the punching bag for the last hour.
“Maybe. What’s goin’ on?” I ask between hits. I haven’t fought in a long time and it’s taking a toll on me. I miss it. I want it.
“Not much. Just heard you beatin’ the hell out of this thing,” he says nodding toward the bag.
“I miss the ring, brother. I miss the blood, sweat... I miss the fight,” I admit.
“You been doin’ it a long time, Dax.” Nodding my head, I swing again. Punch after punch, I don’t stop. I need that release. The release I get when I’m punching the fuck out of someone. I miss it bad.
“Bomber and I been talkin’ about some shit,” he says. I nod my head and take a few more punches before he clears his throat. I stop what I’m doing, turning to face him.
“Spit it out, Kane. I got shit to hit,” I tell him. He grins and shakes his head.
“We wanna open up a gym. Mac over at Tamers has some boys that are pretty good. They need a place to train,” he says. That sounds interesting.
“What’s that got to do with me?” I ask, not understanding any of this.
“They need a trainer. Someone that knows the rules. Someone that knows the game.” My eyes lock with his. A slow smile pulls across his face.
“And you think that’s me?” I ask.
“Fuck, I know it’s you, Dax. I know it’s not fightin’ in the ring but I also know you gave that shit up for your kid and woman. This is the next best thing. You can work off that steam in the gym with those guys. A few are good enough to turn pro. Who the fuck knows where that can take you and this club.” I let that sink in for a few minutes. That is a good idea. I could still fight that way, just not getting my ass kicked.
“You seen these kids fight?” I ask, needing to know what I’m signing up for.
Kane nods his head before he says, “Yeah. They seem good, Dax. With the right trainer, I think they may be on to somethin’...”
“Trainer, huh?” I look at Kane as he nods his head.
“Count me the fuck in. That sounds like a damn good plan, brother. Fill me in later, though. I need to go pick my woman up,” I tell him. I turn and head out of the small gym and down the hallway toward my room to shower.
“Get him ready would ya, Trinity.” Nodding at Cory, she smiles.
“Sure. He just finished eating.”
Chapter 78
Laura
I sit in the lounge with my knees pulled up to my chest. I rock myself as I let that sink in.
This whole time, I had him pegged as the asshole that left his son to die alone and the reality is that he couldn’t handle seeing him die before him. How could I blame him for that? I couldn’t.
I couldn’t see my son die before me either. I wouldn’t have walked away, but I do understand why he did what he did.
I wipe my eyes before shoving off the floor. I head back into the hallway and down to his room.
“Your son was a great person. He kept me sane for a long time. He was always cheerful and full of light, even when he was dying. He made me rethink a lot about my life.” His eyes stay on mine as a slow grin crosses his face.
“I thought you might have known him by the look on your face earlier,” he says softly.
“I wasn’t here when he died. I hated myself for a long time for that. He asked me to be at his funeral. I was there. It was perfect for him. He held a lot in him. So much light that was taken too soon,” I tell him.
“Did he hate me? For leaving him?” he asks, his voice haunted by a past he can’t change. There is no future for him to embrace either. I know what’s coming, and I have two options. Make him suffer through it or help him along the final leg of his journey.
“No. He didn’t hate you. He didn’t understand why… but he didn’t hate you.” A tear falls down his cheek before he reaches his hand out to me. I step closer, closing my fingers around his.
“Would it be selfish of me to ask a favor?” He looks up at me, I shake my head.
“Would you stay with me?” I swallow the lump in my throat. I’ve seen death. I work around it all the time. It never gets easier and it’s never easy to see.
“Yes. I will stay with you.” A small smile pulls across his lips.
“Do you have kids? A husband?”
“I have a son. I named him Cory. My boyfriend Dax, and I, have had a rough go. We’re happy though.” We are happy, aren’t we? Yes, we are.
“Hold onto it.” His words will haunt me forever. Hold onto it.
His grip loosens as the machines begin to sing. Another life that has been returned to its maker. The doctor comes in and shuts down the machines, giving me a nod.
I know I need to leave, but I feel like a piece of Cory is here.
A little voice in my head says that he’s with his dad now.
I let his hand go, placing it on his chest before I walk backward toward the door.
As soon as I step foot into the hallway, I hear it.
“Goddamn, those scrub pants.”
Chapter 79
Dax
Laura laughs before turning to me with tears in her eyes.
“Are you ok?” I ask, reaching for her. I pull her into my chest.
“Yeah. Just had a patient die,” she whispers. I know how hard that is for her. She truly does care about her patients.
“I have some news,” I tell her. She pulls back, smiling up at me.
“It better be good. I don’t know if I can handle bad right now.” I press a kiss to her forehead.
“Kane and Bomber wanna open a gym. They asked me to be the trainer.” Her eyes light up, a smile of perfection crossing her lips.
“That’s amazing! You’re doing it?” she asks enthusiastically. I nod my head when she leaps into my arms. Her arms wrapping around my neck.
“I’m so proud of you.” She kisses my neck as she whispers the words. Damn, it sends jolts of electricity through me when she says that.
“I’m proud of you too.” She pulls back looking at me like I’m crazy. She should already know that I am.
“Why? I haven’t done anything,” she giggles. She doesn’t get just how much she does.
“You have been through hell. You have given birth to a seven-pound baby. I saw the hole it came out of, it wasn’t for a seven-pound baby. You were kidnapped for fuck’s sake. Do you know how truly amazin’ it is that you made it out of all that?” I ask her. She keeps her smile in place. Fuck, she’s gorgeous.
“Do you know the only reason that I made it through any of that?” she asks me. I shake my head.
“Because you were by my side. You were there for me every step of the way. You made me want to get through it all, Dax. I’ve never known anyone like you,” she smiles. I crush her mouth with mine. Needing to connect with her, needing to feel her.
Cory makes a noise in his stroller when Laura pulls away from me. She looks down at our son. He lies there with his momma’s blue eyes staring back at us.
“We
did well with him didn’t we Dax?” As if she had to ask.
“We killed it, darlin’. That boy is gonna be breakin’ hearts and noses,” I tell her as she laughs.
“Do you ever regret it?” She cocks her head to the side to look at me.
“There is nothin’ that involves you that I regret. Except that first night,” I grin. She looks at me confused. Oh, fuck. I know she remembers that first night. Look at her acting all shy about it now.
“What are you talking about? You regret being with me?” She looks at me with that little pissed off glint in her eyes. The one that makes my dick rise every goddamn time.
I smile and make her squirm for a minute before I tell her, “Not bein’ with you. I regret lettin’ Kane get a little taste of what’s mine. I think that motherfucker can still taste your pussy on his lips sometimes.” Her cheeks redden as she takes a few steps away from me.
“I don’t know, Dax. I thought about asking him to join in again. His tongue could do some things I never knew tongues could do,” she says turning away from me. Did she really? She did not just say that to me.
“Is that so? I thought about gettin’ Trinity to come in a few times. Or maybe Aubrie and Micah. I hear she’s a freak in bed.” I watch the way her shoulders rise and fall. Oh, look at that. I’m pushing her buttons.
Laura turns slowly to face me, a smug look on her face.
“I was going to ask you about having Doc join us one night. I could play the naughty nurse.” She wiggles her eyebrows at me.
“You can play nurse with me any time you want, sweetheart. No one, and I mean no one else, touches what’s mine,” I growl, letting her know the games are over.