Rose of Thorne

by Mia Michelle

  “Skylar, what’s wrong, baby?” I ask her as I try to control the panic in my voice.

  “There is nothing wrong, Sebastian. As a matter of fact, everything is absolutely perfect and I owe all of that that to you,” she says smiling and climbs onto my lap to straddle me. I enclose my arms around her bare waist and pull her tightly against me.

  I love this woman more than life itself. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her.

  Tracing my jaw with her fingertips, she studies my face intently. I can feel the love radiate between our bodies without words ever needing to be spoken. I remain silent as she continues speaking.

  “After my parents died I didn’t think it was possible to ever know what happiness truly felt like again. So much of me has been dead on the inside for so long that I couldn’t see myself ever being able to love anyone. You have mended my broken heart and healed my damaged soul, Sebastian, and I thank God every single day for you being in my life. I never imagined that this kind of love was possible or that it even existed. From the moment we met, I have felt this undeniable connection with you. I truly believe God sent you to me to save me from myself and to awaken my soul. I love you with everything in me, Sebastian Kohlson Thorne. You have given me back my life and for that I can never thank you enough.”

  I take her soft hand into mine and place it above my heart.

  “Do you feel this, baby? My heart beats because of you and only for you. You are the very air I breathe, Skylar Rose. You light up the darkness within me and chase away my pain. I never knew what Heaven was until I held you, my beautiful girl. You taught me how incredible love is. I know that we had been destined to find one another, baby. You are truly the other half of my soul. I don’t think you understand, Skylar, but you are my reason for living... you are my lifeline. I don’t ever want to imagine one single moment of my life without you in it,” I say as I sit there trembling before her. I can feel the tears in my eyes and she leans her forehead against mine. The feel of her skin against me is calming and I savor the warmth of her touch.

  “Promise me something,” she says as she takes my hand into hers. I can feel her sweet breath against my face and it is hypnotic.

  “I would do anything for you, baby. You have to know that by now,” I reply and rub my thumb across her plump bottom lip. Her deep clear turquoise eyes look deeply into mine, and it literally takes my breath away.

  “Promise me that we will have a forever of moments just like this and that you will never hold back from letting me love you,” she replies softly.

  I want nothing more at this moment than to promise her all the things she is asking, but I can’t. So much of me wanted to just confess to her everything that happened that night and beg for her forgiveness. She is my gift from God and I know that I don’t deserve her after everything that I have done, but she is my whole world. I know if she ever were to find out what really happened the night of the accident she would never be able to forgive me.

  I decide in this moment, that no matter what, I will never tell her. I can never risk losing her. I will move Heaven and Earth to make sure that I never hurt this woman again. Realizing that she is growing deeply concerned by my sudden silence, I make her the only promise that I know I can truly keep.

  “I promise you as many of these moments that you will allow me to share with you, baby. I promise to you that I will forever love you and I swear to you that I will spend every single precious moment we have together trying to prove to you how much you mean to me and I pray that is forever,” I say and allow the tears to continue.

  She cups my cheeks and I see the sweet tears fall from her gorgeous face. Passionately, she crashes her delicious lips to mine and tenderly we move our tongues against one another. We pour every ounce of our love into that kiss, making it so magical and intimate that I never want it to end. Gasping for air, we break the kiss and I wipe the tears from her delicate face.

  “Forever with you will never be enough, Sebastian,” she softly whispers against my lips and continues staring deeply into my eyes. I can feel the power of her words and it is truly my undoing. I ease her body back onto the floor and through our tears, we begin making slow beautiful love to one another.

  She is right; forever will never be enough time with her. I know that I may not get my forever with her, but for now…for today…she is mine.

  Lucas

  “I can’t stand to see you this way anymore!” Tomas, my best friend, shouts as he holds my drunken ass up in my Monaco apartment hallway. He manages to help me into my bedroom and I collapse onto my bed face first.

  FUCK that hurt!

  I roll over on the huge white bed and the wave of nausea suddenly hits me. I scramble off the bed and stagger past my best friend as he stands there watching me with an angry face. I barely make it to the adjoining bathroom before emptying my stomach into the porcelain toilet. Over and over again, I hurl into it while gripping it for dear life.

  Too much damn whiskey.

  “Stupid fucker!” Tomas snarls at me while he leans with his arms crossed against the bathroom door facing.

  “Don’t start, Tomas,” I manage to reply.

  “Yeah, well… I’m going to start. CeCe and I are not going to watch you drink yourself to death. You are completely out of control, Lucas. You are out every fucking night man and I’m tired of making sure your drunken ass gets home safe. Not to mention you are making my wife cry and that’s not fucking cool!”

  “I’m not your fucking problem, Tomas! If you hadn’t pulled me out of that club tonight I’d be back at the hotel now with that hot brunette and I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be giving me this shit right now!”

  “No, I’m sure you’re right. She would have left your limp dick ass right about now when you tossed chunks all over her. You are such a stupid son of a bitch!” he yells making his French accent more prominent. That always seems to happen when he gets pissed. And trust me. Right now, he is REALLY pissed.

  “When are you going to fucking learn, Lucas? You can’t drink or fuck her memory away. I’m just going to tell you, my friend, that there isn’t enough alcohol or women in this world to do it.”

  “Well, I’m going to damn well try!” I hatefully reply, now sobering up.

  He is right though, I can’t forget her. I should have never let her go so easily and now… now it’s too late.

  When I returned to Paris, I threw myself into my business for distraction. It worked for a couple of months, but then when I finished, there was no way I could return home to Texas. After leaving Paris, I decided to head to Monaco for a while and stay at my apartment next door to my best friends, Tomas and CeCe.

  My company is running smoothly without me and I try to check in most every day. For the most part, I spend my time with women and booze. They are my new best distraction in my miserable life.

  Once I get back to Monaco, brunettes become my only choice for women. I spot one in a nightclub or random bar, and then drink until I don’t feel anything inside. Then I bring the girl to a hotel, fuck her from behind, and pretend that she is the girl who still owns my heart. I never look at their faces during sex, I can’t. I only feel worse when I sober up and realize the girl next to me isn’t Skylar. My life is a fucking mess and it is all because of her.

  “They’re getting married, Tomas,” I say, as I stagger back into my bedroom. I reach over and hand him the invitation that I keep by my bed. I keep it there so I can look at her gorgeous face when I stay here. Yeah, I like to torture myself.

  “Next month they are getting married man. It’s too late. I’ve lost her,” I say with a pained voice. The alcohol still makes me woozy, but I’m feeling better since I threw up. I sit back on the bed and rest my head in my hands, leaning forward until my elbows rests on my knees.

  “Do you love her still?” he asks me, tapping the invitation against his leg.

  “Of course I still fucking love her. Do you think I would be this way if I didn’t love her?” I shoot back a
t him.

  He sits down on the bed beside me and puts his hand on my shoulder before he continues speaking.

  “Well, if you still love her then you owe it to yourself to tell her that. She needs to know, Lucas, and you don’t want to regret this one day. More than anything, you need to do this now before you destroy yourself.”

  “I can’t tell her I love her; she obviously loves him. She is marrying him for fuck sake, Tomas! Besides, I know she doesn’t love me back. She never did. I just want her to be happy, whether it is me or with someone else. I had just hoped it would have been me.”

  Those words hurt to say. They hurt even more to admit to myself in my head. The ugly truth is that I had danced around for the entire time we were together. I know without a doubt that she cared deeply for me, but I always knew that there was someone else who really owned her heart. That someone is not me. It is Sebastian Thorne.

  I snatch back the invitation from Tomas’ hand and study her picture.

  Oh, how I miss that face!

  “You need closure, Lucas, and the only way that is going to happen is if you tell her how you feel. Not for her, but for you. No matter what she says or does, you need to know that you at least got that off your chest.”

  “You’re suggesting that I just go up to her door and knock and say ‘I love you’?” I sarcastically ask him.

  “Yeah, well, I was thinking more along the lines of a conversation over lunch or dinner, but that would work too, I suppose,” he teases, but I am not humored.

  “Fuck off!” I fire back at him.

  “Yeah, well, I need to get back home to CeCe. Please, Lucas, think about I said. I think you need that in order to move on.”

  “Yeah, whatever, I’m tired. Tell CeCe I will make this up to her and take you guys out to eat.”

  “I’ll tell her. I’m sure she’ll pick the most expensive place possible. She’s pretty upset with you right now,” he chuckles.

  I deserve that,” I reply and he throws his hand up to wave goodbye.

  “Tomas?” he turns as I call his name.

  “Yeah?”

  “Thanks for getting me home and… well… everything.”

  “No problem, my friend. I will see you tomorrow.”

  I fall back onto my bed and hold her picture above me. I think about what Tomas had said to me and of course, he had been right. Right now, I am on a direct path for self-destruction and it needs to end. I sit up, pull my phone out of my pocket, and make the call to my pilot.

  It looks like I’m heading back to Texas.

  Skylar

  “Are you sure you don’t need me to take you to the doctor, baby?” Sebastian fusses over me as I sit on the living room couch.

  “I’m just fine, silly, so please stop worrying. I am just really tired I guess,” I reply.

  “I think I’ll just call Nik and tell him I’m staying here with you,” he says worriedly.

  “Go on to the gym, Sebastian. I’ll be fine.”

  “Please, just get some rest and leave this work stuff alone, okay? Promise me or I won’t go to the gym,” he says seriously.

  I reach over and brush his handsome face and smile.

  My husband-to-be is freaking sexy as hell and that tight muscle shirt shows off every perfect chiseled section of his abdomen and arms. Does he really have to go to the gym?

  “I promise I’ll leave it alone, okay, worry wart? Now go! Scoot!” I tease him and he pulls the blanket over my body.

  He leans in, kisses me softly on the lips, and whispers, “I love you, baby.”

  “I love you more,” I return and he beams that sexy as sin smile at me. I swear he could totally level a room full of swooning women with that look and now it is all for me.

  He grabs his bag and heads out to meet Nik at the gym. I close my eyes and drift into a peaceful sleep.

  My ringing phone wakes me and I look over at the clock and realize I have only been asleep for about twenty minutes.

  Great, now I feel worse than before I laid down.

  I groan and reach for my phone and see that it’s Chanru, Mr. Yung’s assistant calling me from Japan.

  “Moshi Mosh!” I say to him as I answer my phone.

  “Hello, my dear Skylar, I am just calling you to discuss the dates for the grand opening party for L.A.”

  “Sure,” I reply grabbing my pen off my schedule book. I was just jotting down the details when my pen dies.

  “Hang on, Chanru, my pen just ran out of ink on me. I’m going to grab one from the office,” I say as I sit down at Sebastian’s desk.

  Of course, his desk would be immaculate with no pens, so I’m forced to search through the drawers. With the phone tucked under my chin, I reach for the top drawer of Sebastian’s desk, but find it locked. I pull at his other drawers expecting that they too are locked, but the bottom one surprisingly opens.

  I place a couple of folders in my lap before moving a velvet bag, but I’m still not finding a pen anywhere. Chanru politely says he will email me all of the details and would be in contact with me soon. I was just ending the call when a picture falls from the folder and into my lap. Picking it up, I realize that it is my school id picture from my last year at college.

  Why on earth would he have this picture of me?

  Trying to shrug it off, I open the folder to place the picture back inside, but what I see leaves me completely stunned. My life for the past 8 years… page after page of details and pictures. School reports, awards, and details of my parent’s accident.

  Why would he have this?

  I open the other folder to find it’s the police file about the report on Trevor and his assault on me. I am so confused and am now shaking uncontrollably. None of this makes any sense at all. I set the folders on top of his desk and place the velvet bag beside them. Something shiny catches my eye, and maybe I shouldn’t have, but I tug the bag the rest of the way open. I now wish that I hadn’t.

  My whole world crumbles because of the contents of that bag.

  I am in complete disbelief as I stare down at it. It has been almost 8 years since I held this in my hands and yet why is it here? I stand and the chair slides past me.

  This can’t be the bracelet. It’s just a mere coincidence.

  When I open the clasp, the words my parents had inscribed are inside.

  There is only one way he has this bracelet… Oh my God… NO! NO! NOOO!

  The room begins to sway and I grip the desk as I see him walk in. There is pure terror in his eyes when he sees my face and the silver bracelet in my hand. I manage one word. “How?”

  Sebastian

  Of course, my bachelor cousin would stand me up for a workout to hook up with the Kylie again. I swear those two have been glued together since Nik moved back here to Austin last month. It is just as well that he ditched me anyway because I am way too concerned about Skylar to stay and exercise. She had been pale and tired lately and I am worried she has been working too hard between the Yung account and our wedding. Many nights I had seen her up working on details or drafting a new design. I pull my workout bag back on to my shoulder and head back home to check on my beautiful girl.

  I try to stay quiet when I enter the apartment because I figured that she may still be sleeping on the couch, but she isn’t there. I quietly check our bedroom but I find that it’s also empty.

  “Skylar?” I call through the apartment. I continue my search for her down the hall, when I see her figure standing in my office. She is looking down at something in her right hand and gripping onto my desk for dear life with her other. She looks pale and exhausted standing there in only her sleep shorts and shirt.

  “Skylar?” I say softly as I step into the room. She jumps and turns toward me, and it is then that I get a clear look at her. My beautiful girl is wearing a look of horror and confusion on her tear stained face, and I instantly become panicked. I glimpse down to her shaking hand see the glimmering silver bracelet that she is holding and everything seems to close in around m
e.

  She knows.

  “How? How do you have this Sebastian?” she says, waving the bracelet in the air.

  For so long I have waited for this moment. I somehow have convinced myself that I would be able to explain everything to her, but here I stand, facing the woman I love more than life itself, and there are no words.

  How do I tell her that I am the reason she lost everything when I know I will lose everything when I tell her?

  “Answer me, Sebastian! How do you have my bracelet?” she shouts at me and narrows her eyes. But I don’t have to answer her because my betraying eyes do the job for me.

  “No…NO! Oh my GOD! NO. NO. NO! It was you? You were the one driving that night?” she sobs and grabs for her chest. Because she is such a part of my soul, I can feel her intense pain. It radiates from her to me and slams into my chest. It is all I can do to breathe and I know I have to do something…but what?

  I can’t lose her! I will never survive without her!

  I try to reach out to her… to my beautiful angel in agony. I watch her gorgeous turquoise eyes flood with tears that pour down her flawless face. Through the tears, I can see all the pain in her haunted eyes. The pain from losing her parents, the pain of all the years lost, all of her hopes and dreams destroyed, and then, there is the pain of my deception. All of her pain… every single painful memory of her life is because of me.

  “Baby, please…you are my life. I wanted to tell you from the beginning. Please let me explain… baby, PLEASE… look at me,” I desperately plead, now crying myself. I wait for her to scream at me. For her to hit me...to tell me that she hates me…ANYTHING, but none of that happens. Instead, she does something else and it is something more painful than I could have ever conceived to be possible. She slides the ring representing our future together from her trembling finger and places it on my desk. She turns to face me and opens those beautiful eyes. What I see next will always haunt me. I am still expecting to see hate, rage, even disgust, but instead I see nothing. The startling color that once held so much life now holds nothing at all. I know in that moment that I have completely lost her… forever.