Last Stop This Town

by David Steinberg

  The girl just stared at him blankly. He couldn’t read her expression but it certainly seemed like maybe he just blew it.

  After a moment, she finally spoke: “Lo siento. No hablo inglés.”

  Walker stared at her in disbelief. “You don’t understand me.”

  He was dazed for a second. His whole ridiculous speech a moment ago hadn’t turned her off. For all she knew, he was describing the various ways he was going to defile her. Whatever she might have thought he said, it didn’t seem to turn her off the idea of having sex with him. To the contrary, she pulled a condom out of her purse and handed to him.

  Walker just stared at her. She was so hot with her tight, naked body. This was the moment he’d dreamt of since he got hair on his balls. All he had to do was let it happen. But Walker was Walker, and Walker made everything complicated.

  He stared at the condom, then back at her. Then, after what seemed like an eternity, he said, “I can’t.”

  He sat up in bed.

  She was confused.

  “I’m sorry. You are very beautiful. This just isn’t—It’s not what I imagined.”

  She wondered what she had done wrong.

  Walker continued, “I know you don’t understand a word I’m saying but I just want my first time to be with someone I care about. I don’t even know your name and you don’t speak English so it’s not like we’re getting to know each other here. Ah, I’m such an idiot. Look, I appreciate the offer, but I just can’t. I’m so sorry.”

  Walker pulled his shirt back on. Maybe she had no idea what had just happened, but at least she understood that they were done fooling around.

  She gave Walker a reassuring hug before getting dressed.

  The other room was now covered in foam from the fire extinguishers, and everyone was laughing like it was the funniest thing they’d ever seen.

  Pike was on a swivel desk chair and propelled himself across the room by discharging the fire extinguisher. “Ev-a!” he screamed, doing his best Wall-e impersonation.

  Just then, Walker emerged from the bedroom. His friends saw him and hooted and hollered. Walker couldn’t help but blush. He made his way over to the couch and Dylan high-fived him.

  “How was it?”

  Walker was not about to tell them the truth, for fear of permanently obliterating his already pathetic sexual reputation. “Good. Awesome.”

  Dylan seemed more excited than Walker. “Yeah, baby!”

  Noah patted Walker on the back. “She is so hot. Nicely done.”

  Walker tried to hide his embarrassment by changing the subject. “So let’s head out.”

  Pike wasn’t going anywhere. “We’re fucking around with fire extinguishers.”

  Walker raised his voice, irritated. “So you guys want to stay here all night?”

  Dylan picked up on the shift in Walker’s demeanor and sensed something was up. He looked over at the girl still standing in the doorway with her arms crossed. He knew what girls looked like after sex, and that wasn’t it.

  He covered for Walker, “Yeah, Walker’s right. Let’s get going.”

  The others agreed and Pike packed up his book bag of weed.

  Jesus opened the door and shook Pike’s hand. “Say hi to Ned for me.”

  “Hey, where do you know Ned from anyway?” Dylan wondered aloud.

  “Junior Entrepreneurs Camp.”

  Noah and Dylan looked at each other, amused.

  As the guys headed out, Walker looked back at the girl one more time. They made eye contact and she smiled a goodbye.

  Walker didn’t regret his decision.

  Jesus closed the door and walked back into the apartment. He turned to his cousin, Carmelita, and teasingly asked in Spanish, “You have fun, you big slut?”

  Carmelita replied in Spanish, “Oh, nothing happened. He couldn’t get it up.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  IT WAS CLOSE to nine p.m. and it was finally time to find the party Dylan kept talking about. They had paid eighty bucks each upfront and got special hologram-etched wristbands overnighted to them from Dylan’s friend. It wasn’t just supposed to be better than a high school party, it was supposed to be in a whole other category, and the guys were starting to get really excited.

  Dylan drove south on the West End Highway as Noah read the text message off Dylan’s phone. Walker was checking for GPS directions on Pike’s phone but for some reason the address didn’t seem to exist, which kind of made the party seem even cooler.

  “It says it’s off Front Street,” Noah told the others.

  “I’m freaking hungry,” Pike moaned, his munchies kicking in. “Can we stop for some food?”

  Walker found something on Pike’s phone. “This says Front Street is near Wall Street.”

  Noah wasn’t sure. “The warehouse is near Wall Street? That can’t be right.”

  “Let’s just ask for directions,” Walker suggested.

  But Dylan felt confident that the warehouse would magically reveal itself to them. “Relax. We’ll find it.”

  Forty minutes later, Dylan turned down Water Street for the third time. They were officially lost. They tried turning onto Fulton Street, then Beekman.

  Thirty minutes after that, they were completely off target, cruising up Avenue A.

  “Is this the Village?” Noah asked. Sure, West Hartford was only two hours away from New York, but that didn’t make them any more familiar with the streets than an average tourist.

  “I’m hungry!” Pike repeated for the millionth time.

  “Just ask for directions,” Walker harped once again.

  Dylan was losing his cool. “I don’t need directions. We’re almost there.”

  They stopped at a red light. Walker took the initiative by rolling down his window and yelling over to a cute young woman, “Hey, do you know where Front Street is?”

  She came over and leaned in through the window. On closer inspection, the guys saw that she was obviously a street walker. If you couldn’t tell by the cheap blonde wig, then maybe the fishnet stockings and pink halter-top might have given it away.

  She looked around the car and eyed the four guys. “Sure, I know where it is,” she replied, then smiled at Walker. “Do you need a date?”

  “Sure!” Walker blurted out without thinking.

  And with that, she opened the door and got in.

  Noah turned back to Walker. “Are you kidding me?”

  But Walker just looked clueless as usual. “What?”

  “Dude, she’s a hooker,” Pike explained.

  “No, she’s not,” Walker shrugged off.

  “Pretty sure…” Pike shot back.

  The prostitute just looked at them, confused. She could obviously hear this whole conversation.

  The light changed and Dylan had no choice but to continue up Avenue A. He just shook his head, wondering how Walker ever got into college.

  And the hooker now started to wonder what the hell was going on. She turned to Walker and asked, “So do you want me to suck you off or what?”

  Without turning around, Dylan shouted to the back seat, “Yes, that would be fantastic. But first, my friend Walker there would like to know how much money it would cost to engage in the aforementioned sex act.”

  “Dylan!” Walker yelled, still clinging to the belief that this woman was just a nice girl. Perhaps a bit fashion-challenged, and obviously promiscuous, but not a prostitute! He felt embarrassed that Dylan was insulting her.

  But the hooker merely sensed an opportunity and replied, “For three hundred I’ll blow all four of you.”

  And that’s when Walker finally realized his error and turned bright red.

  “No, thanks,” Pike answered matter-of-factly. “I think I got AIDS from a homeless guy’s poop.”

  Walker was thoroughly humiliated and tried to explain, “I’m sorry. I really thought you wanted to go on a date with me.”

  “You think this is funny? I got rent to pay.” She started to get agitated.
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br />   Walker tried to calm her down. “No, honestly, we’re going to a party and I thought you wanted to go with me.”

  “Fine. I’ll go with you for a hundred dollars. And I’ll throw in a hand job.”

  Dylan finally ended the suffering with: “Walker, just give her twenty bucks for being a moron.”

  Walker sucked it up, pulled out his wallet, and handed her a twenty.

  Dylan pulled over to the curb. “Sorry for wasting your time.”

  She rolled her eyes, opened the door, and got out… right in front of a police officer.

  The officer wasn’t even paying attention, but Walker panicked and blurted out, “She’s not a prostitute.”

  That succeeded in getting the cop’s attention. The police officer leaned his head into the car. “Excuse me?”

  The other guys shrank in embarrassment.

  “She’s my date,” Walker nervously lied. “We’re going to a graduation party.”

  “I see,” said the cop.

  Dylan smiled at the cop, pointed with his thumb at Walker in the back seat, and whispered proudly, “He’s going to Brandeis next year.”

  The officer looked the guys over, then closed Walker’s door for him, patted the roof of the car, and sent them on their way. “Drive safe, boys.” Then he turned to the prostitute and said, “And you be safe, too, Coco.”

  Dylan pulled out into traffic and turned left onto Houston Street.

  Walker, still embarrassed, mumbled, “It was an honest mistake.”

  Dylan shouted into the back seat, “Will you two fuckheads stay away from all the hookers and con men please?”

  “I found the queen the first two times!”

  “We’re almost at the Brooklyn Bridge,” Dylan noted. “You want me to see if it’s still for sale?”

  Noah laughed and changed the subject. “Look, it’s still early. Let’s just find some place to hang out.”

  “And get some food!” Pike reminded them.

  “We can ask for directions or get a new map or whatever,” Walker tried to convince Dylan. “But I’m tired of driving around in circles.”

  “Okay, okay,” Dylan gave in to the majority will, then added under his breath, “What a bunch of girls.”

  Dylan parked on Bleecker Street in the heart of Greenwich Village. They all got out and Dylan said, “Everyone remember where we parked.”

  The Cube beeped locked and they headed out.

  The guys walked around for a bit to get the lay of the land, and soon the guys found themselves on MacDougal Street. Greenwich Village was a fun part of Manhattan that the guys had never really explored on previous trips into the city with their parents. It didn’t have as many desperate weirdos as the East Village, but it was still a lot more eclectic than back home. NYU students, young gay men, and visiting hipsters crowded the narrow streets filled with cool beer halls, funky clothes stores, and trendy cafés. The warm weather really brought people outside and the fun vibe of cool, young people everywhere was intoxicating. It felt like no matter which way they turned, something was happening. It was like a music festival. Or Spring Break in Cabo… at least according to MTV.

  Suddenly, Dylan announced, “Two o’clock, check it out.”

  It was a group of five super-hot girls their age.

  “Let’s see where they’re heading,” Dylan suggested, and immediately changed directions to intercept them.

  “No, come on,” Pike whined. “You said we were gonna eat. I’m starving.”

  “You’ve just got the munchies,” Noah said dismissively.

  But Walker took Pike’s side in this debate, saying, “I could eat.”

  “Fine,” Dylan replied quickly, keeping his eyes on the girls. “Go grab something. We’ll meet up with you later. I’ll text you where we are.”

  “Cool,” Pike agreed and he headed out with Walker to find some food.

  Dylan turned to Noah, happy to be temporarily free of the dead weight of Pike and Walker. They were great to have around 99% of the time, but when it came to stalking prey you needed to travel light, and one wingman was plenty. “Come on.”

  Dylan started running after the group of girls and Noah ran to catch up. As he got within shouting distance, Dylan slowed down and got their attention. “Hey! Hey.”

  The girls stopped and turned around. They looked roughly eighteen, dressed a bit fancy, and seemed rich. Dylan guessed they were from Manhattan or maybe Long Island. Either way, he could tell just from looking that these girls were up for some fun, and it was actually a lot easier to convince five girls to get crazy than just one or two.

  Noah let Dylan take the lead, of course, and Dylan didn’t let him down. “Hey, I’m Dylan,” he began. “Listen. We are totally lost. We were supposed to meet some friends but we’re not from the city. Can you help us out?”

  The girls looked them over.

  Leah, the cute one with short brown hair that fell over her eyes, answered. “Where are you supposed to meet them?”

  “Where are you guys going?” Dylan avoided a direct answer.

  Becky, the tall one with the long hair, said, “Element.”

  “That’s the name of the place,” Dylan continued fabricating. He turned to Noah and asked, “Element, right?” for added credibility.

  Noah played along. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure that sounds right.”

  Dylan smiled and waited. He knew that’s all he had to do.

  Finally, the first one, Leah, suggested, “Do you want to come with us?”

  But Dylan surprisingly played it coy. “I don’t know. Our girlfriends might get jealous.”

  Noah looked at Dylan like he was crazy, but Dylan knew exactly what he was doing. First, by mentioning that they had girlfriends, Dylan had conveyed that they were into girls, but just not them, and were therefore safe to hang out with. But second, by playing it coy, the girls wanted them even more because, according to Dylan, girls always want what they can’t have.

  Leah played right into his hand and replied, “Don’t worry. We won’t molest you.”

  The girls laughed and Leah took Dylan by the arm. Becky linked arms with wild looking Chelsea, buxom blonde Faith, and waspy looking Caitlin. Together, the four girls grabbed Noah and escorted him down the street as well.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  PIKE AND WALKER made their way down to Chinatown. They could have been eating by now but Pike was a surprisingly picky eater for someone who was perpetually hungry.

  Walker spotted a sign in one window. “There, there you go. All you can eat, nine ninety five.”

  Pike finally agreed. “Challenge accepted, Hop Li Buffet Restaurant.”

  They headed in.

  Soon, Walker and Pike were filling up their plates with food from the buffet in this Chinese restaurant with dead ducks hanging in the window. Walker was surprised at how busy the place was at this hour, but Pike explained that New York City was “like its own time zone.” There were a lot of couples on dates and quite a few college kids who looked like they had the munchies worse than Pike.

  They moved forward in the buffet line and Pike elbowed Walker. “Go for the shrimp. Pound for pound it’s the most expensive thing here.”

  “I don’t want shrimp.” Walker scooped a mound of white rice instead.

  Pike looked personally offended. “Dude, what the fuck are you doing? Rice costs like a nickel and it will fill you up before you get your money’s worth.”

  A woman in front of them glanced back at Pike like he was an incredible asshole.

  Walker rolled his eyes. “How am I supposed to eat Chinese food without rice? This is dinner, not an arbitrage opportunity.” He scooped more rice onto his plate, defiantly.

  Pike shrugged. “Whatever. Sucker.”

  At Element, hundreds of people were dancing to the thumping techno music in this former 19th century bank, now an all-ages dance club. The place was huge, with three levels: the candlelit brick walls of the private mezzanine, the lower “vault” level with old-fashioned
safe doors, and the main dance floor with its 36,000-watt sound system. Element was the kind of place that spent a lot of money telling the world how cool it was, which of course made it fairly uncool, but the girls picked the place, and Dylan would have followed them to the Post Office if he thought he might get lucky.

  The crowd was mostly “bridge and tunnel”—few locals took Element seriously—but there were a lot of out-of-towners in the city tonight and the dance floor was packed. The silver lining was that Dylan could dance right up against Leah without the usual break-in period.

  Leah was incredibly sexy. She had short hair almost like a boy’s, but it fell over her green eyes like a picture you’d see in a hair salon. (Her haircut was actually very similar to Dylan’s vision-obscuring do, and if Noah had been a Freudian psychologist, he might have suggested it was the reason Dylan was so into her.) She was wearing a low-cut black dress that barely covered her butt. The music was a nondescript bass line that they could feel in their teeth, but Leah seemed into it, so Dylan was into it as well.

  Noah played the good wingman, keeping the other four girls occupied at the juice bar. He sipped his twelve dollar orange juice, then yelled to be heard, “Do you guys live here in Manhattan?”

  Faith answered, “No, we just came in from the Island for the weekend.”

  Faith was stunning. She had long, curly blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. Her red dress was longer than Leah’s—everyone’s was—but on her, it just looked elegant. Noah could see she had some seriously big boobs packed in there but he tried his best not to let her catch him staring.

  She added, “Leah’s dad got her a suite at the Plaza for a graduation present.”