Tyler's Blind Date Experiment

by Alicia Street

  Now that he had no regular income, the mortgage payments he still had and the upkeep were things to consider. Sure, he had a few moneymaking investments, but not nearly what his brother or parents had. Even though he constantly sought out and brought in donors for the hydrotherapy center, he’d been funding a lot of it out of his own pocket and still needed to do that.

  So, unless he was going to find a good job elsewhere pronto, he would have to play his parents “find a wife” game.

  He pulled into his garage and breathed a sigh as he walked into the airy space of his foyer that had a double-level ceiling with a row of skylights. The pale hardwood floors throughout and the open design with white walls gave it an optimistic brightness. Not to mention his favorite aspect—water on two sides. Out his back door he could walk down wooden slat stairs to a bay beach, and on the side of the house he had a narrow inlet with a dock where he could moor his forty-seven-foot Cantius, which was small as yachts went, but bigger than most speed boats. Even the far side of the house that was landlocked had water—a swimming pool where he did his daily sixty laps.

  He loped up the stairs to his master bedroom, opened the glass doors to the deck that overlooked the bay, then tossed off his clothes and jumped into shower. He would be meeting the Crozers at five thirty and he was waiting for a reply from the Porters. Both married couples were recommended to him by Emily, the admin assistant at Yacht World who seemed to thrive on knowing all the gossip and inner workings of his family.

  Earlier, when he left his office after dealing with Caleb’s files, Emily had cornered him, saying, “I know this is new ground for you, Tyler, but there are a lot of happily married couples out there.”

  “Really? I don’t know of any,” he shot back. It was not completely true, but he found it offensive that even a woman who had never married felt she should give him advice on the subject.

  Emily lifted her chin. “If you’re not going to take this seriously—”

  “I never said that.”

  “All right, then I can think of two lovely couples right off the top of my head that are examples of how blissful marriage can be. I’m sure talking with them would be a great help.”

  Geez. “I can hardly wait to meet them.” His sarcastic tone somehow missed its mark because on his way out his phone buzzed with a text from Emily giving him their names and contact info.

  Methodical by nature, Tyler decided maybe it would be a good idea to go ahead and meet with these couples. See what advice they had and try to get himself into the spirit of his exploration.

  And a part of him was excited about it, believe it or not. A part of him really did want to fill this house with a family.

  Twenty minutes later, Tyler was sitting across the table from Dan and Sierra Crozer at a vegan take-out eatery. The thirty-something couple looked like they’d walked straight out of a health and wellness catalogue as they sat there poking away at their kale salads.

  Dan gazed up at Tyler over the edge of his fork as he took his time chewing while pondering the first question. “Let’s see. What’s our secret to being so happy together? We just get along. I guess you’d call it being in harmony. Right, angel?”

  “Right, pookie.” She glanced at Tyler. “We have a common foe. And that is stress. To avoid it we practice a healthy lifestyle that is in balance.”

  “And don’t forget deeeeep breathing,” Dan added.

  Tyler nodded, telling himself to keep an open mind even though these two kind of gave him the creeps. They even wore matching shirts. “Okay. Uh, balance sounds good.”

  “Balance is everything,” Sierra said. “And with it we can achieve a state of well-being for ourselves, our community, and our planet.”

  A bit out there, but Tyler reminded himself again not to judge. “You guys obviously are an inspiring example of how couples who’ve spent years together can still get along. We all know compatibility is key. Any tips on how to find that?”

  Dan leaned forward. “That’s an easy one. Sierra and I basically like all the same things. Organic food. Yoga. Hiking. Fasting. The teachings of Tibetan masters. Which means we share everything.”

  Sierra tilted her head. “Well, not everything.”

  “Oh, come on, angel. We do so.”

  Sierra smirked. “Let’s just say we also have our boundaries.”

  “What the hell does that mean?” Dan asked, brows knit.

  “Did you forget that bogus cooking workshop we went to last week? I didn’t really want to go. It was a total bust. We should sue that instructor for being a fraud.”

  “No way! His mixed green soufflé came out great.”

  “Made me want to puke.”

  Tyler shifted in his seat, uncomfortable as their rising voices and hostile tone turned heads in their direction.

  Dan put his fork down with a disgusted look. “Frankly, this salad tastes like was made last weekend.”

  Sierra snorted. “Well, you’re the one who chose this place.”

  “Your sister recommended it.”

  “Don’t you drag her into this.”

  At this point Tyler grabbed the check that lay on the table, and quietly made his exit.

  Chapter 4

  “You look lovely.”

  “Thanks, Ms. Glitsky,” Caroline said, handing her the bag of butterscotch peach cookies and her change.

  “See that?” Brina grinned at her as Ms. Glitsky left. “Ed Nemlok said the same thing. Everyone likes your new look.”

  “And if it’s one thing I live for, it is the admiration of a middle-aged librarian and men old enough to be my grandfather.”

  Brina waved her off. “Give it time. He’ll be here and he will notice.”

  “If the ‘he’ you are talking about is Tyler Westfall, I’m not going to hold my breath since he has obviously found a new place to get his coffee.”

  “Or maybe he just changed his schedule.”

  Caroline leaned her hip against the counter, crossing her arms over her chest. “Well, I doubt that because one of us has been here every day and there’s been no sign of him for two weeks.”

  “Or maybe he’s preoccupied with business. If it’s any consolation I went to his Facebook. He hasn’t posted for about a month.”

  “You went to his Facebook?”

  “Naturally,” Brina replied. “That’s what social media is for. You should see him with his shirt off. There is one photo with him standing in the desert somewhere next to this camel. Probably Egypt.”

  “It’s a donkey. And it was taken in Mexico.”

  Brina’s jaw dropped. “Ah-haaa.”

  “Yeah, I did some research too. Not that I really care.” Caroline went back to refilling the sugar packet holders. “I told you I was doing this for me, not for any man. It’s kind of an experiment to see how I feel about myself when I look more like I did before my fast and furious art career.”

  “You have to admit Jerome did a great job on your hair.”

  “Yes, he did.” Caroline swept her hand down her straight locks that hung just below her chin. Jerome the hairdresser was able to turn the hot pink sections to soft auburn highlights while the rest, which had been blue, was now an ash blonde frighteningly similar to her natural color.

  As to the other things, she kept a couple ear studs, but took out her lip and nose jewelry. The holes had been there too long to heal right away, so she used some makeup to cover the scars. Her lipstick was now a soft rose and her clothes blousy and subdued.

  “So, how does it feel? Are you getting plain-Jane nightmares?” Brina teased.

  Caroline shrugged. “I don’t know. I just feel like a bland and fat barista.”

  “You are not bland or fat. You have a full hourglass figure. Kind of a Scarlett Johansson look, especially now that your hair is lighter.”

  “Thank you for the kind words, but you are a fellow female. I told you my history of zero dates during my plain-Jane days.”

  “But you were a teen and stuck in all that nonsen
se that happens in high school. It is not the same when you’re an adult. People all have different taste, different ideas of what they like or do not like. You could get plenty of dates now.”

  “Sorry, but you are wrong. Plain and boring does not attract men. And I’m okay with that.”

  “Well, I’m not.” Brina pulled out her phone. “Call me stubborn, but I am going to prove it to you.”

  “How?”

  “Let me take a few photos and put you on a dating app, and I guarantee you will have a lot of offers to choose from.”

  “Forget it. Not gonna happen,” Caroline said. “Aside from not wanting to joining the loser population, I don’t want to risk our safety.”

  “You don’t give out any personal info, including where you work. You don’t even use your real name, although some use first names. You give a general location because you obviously can’t date someone who lives a zillion miles away. And if you establish enough of an online rapport with someone and want to meet in person, you make it in a public place.”

  “Sounds like you have experience with this stuff.”

  Brina laughed. “Actually, I researched it because I was going to join one, but I’m not ready. So we’ll start with you.”

  “I’m the guinea pig, huh?”

  “No, you are just the brave one, and even though I talk a good game, you know that’s true. You have done so many things I would never do, both good and bad. So why should you be intimidated by a little thing like this?”

  “Uh-oh. I can tell those wicked sales skills of yours are being directed at me.”

  “And I can tell you are intrigued.”

  Caroline tied her hair back, put on gloves, and turned away to replenish the cookie racks in the glass display case.

  Brina walked over and started on the tray next to hers. “Tell ya what…how about if I agree to getting a cat or dog if you just give it a try.”

  Backing out of the glass case, her head popping up over the counter, Caroline smiled. “You really mean that?”

  “I sure do.”

  Their third partner, Trinity, had taken her cat with her when she moved to California, and Caroline had wanted to get another pet so badly. But because she lived above the cafe, it would be both a home pet and shop pet, so Brina’s objection had stalled her plans.

  “Okay, you’ve got a deal.”

  That evening after they closed the cafe, Brina said, “Let’s go outside to take your profile photos before it gets dark.”

  “Or we could do them in here, like maybe standing in front of the mantel?”

  “No. That mantel shows up in some of our website photos. We cannot use anything that some creep could trace using a reverse image search to find out where you live or work.”

  “Wow, I would never have thought of that.”

  “We’ll use something generic that could be anywhere.”

  “Should I go put on some makeup and change my clothes?”

  “Nope. I think you look fine as you are. In fact, Ms. Plain-Jane, aside from wanting you to find a date, I am dying to prove to you that flash is not the best way to get a man. Unless you’re just looking for a hook-up. You want a possible relationship, right?”

  Her stomach clenched. “It has been so long since I’ve dealt with this territory, but, yeah, that is ideally what I would want.”

  “So Plain-Jane it is.” Brina pointed to the back door. “Let’s use the back yard. Our big porch and yard out front have also been online in some photos.”

  They found an area with some nondescript bushes that seemed innocuous enough. Caroline walked into place but didn’t know what kind of pose to take. Five years ago when her artwork was “discovered” by a big time New York City gallery owner, she had somehow known the look she wanted to portray. One that would show her as a young, hip, brilliant, cutting edge artist. She had chosen a new name—Luna—and zealously took on her new identity, an identity that left behind the sad invisible plain girl she had been.

  But who am I now?

  “Take your hand away from your face,” Brina instructed her. “And turn three quarters. Yeah, one hand on your hip is good. Now try one with your arms down and your head slightly tilted in to the side. Yes, that’s nice.”

  “I had no idea you were such a professional photographer, my dear.”

  “Well, that remains to be seen, although I think these are pretty good.”

  After a few more shots, the two women went inside and chose which to use. Brina had already decided which dating app they would try. They went upstairs to Caroline’s living space above the cafe.

  It had been the four-bedroom second floor of the house, but Caroline and Trinity had it renovated into a two-bedroom apartment when they’d purchased it together and started the cafe and coffee roasting business. Brina had already begun buying her house in Jamesport at the time.

  As they worked on the profile for the dating app, Caroline could hardly believe the number of questions to fill out—even about politics and religion, if they were a factor for someone.

  “We don’t have to answer all of these, do we?”

  “Only what would be useful for the software to match up.” Brina took the lead. “You will tell that you are divorced, but I suggest we leave out the fact that you were semi-famous in your field because you might attract artists looking for someone who can help them get through the door.”

  Caroline nodded. “I also don’t want to have to tell a stranger the story of how everything in my life fell apart.”

  “Agreed.” Brina’s finger scrolled through the pages, touching the screen here and there. “You love coffee and cookies. You have a bachelor of fine arts and work in the food service industry. Do you play or watch any particular sport?”

  “No. I have two left feet. So I hate to dance too.”

  “We won’t tell that one. But you like eighties rock and…”

  “Japanese koto music.”

  “Let’s not put that down either. It’s a little weird.”

  “I am not weird.”

  “Yeah, you are, but I love ya that way.”

  They went through more questions and shaped the statement about what she was looking for—someone who was down-to-earth, mature, who was not afraid to commit to a long-term relationship; someone who saw himself as a future husband and father. By the time they finished, Caroline felt drained.

  “Well,” Brina said, her voice perky, “we’ve launched our kite into the breeze. Let’s see how she flies.”

  “Pretty sad-looking kite. OMG, you gave me a profile name of Plain Jane.”

  “That’s right. So I can prove my point to you.”

  “I’ll try not to let it totally wipe out what little ego I have left in me when I hear nothing but crickets.”

  “Honey, trust me, there ain’t no crickets out there. We’re talking about big hungry male bears. Once their little noses pick up the slightest trace of that female scent they will come a-running from a hundred miles off.”

  Caroline groaned. “How romantic.”

  Chapter 5

  Judging from his father’s words, the clock was ticking, but ever the optimist, Tyler felt confident. Even if he got off to a rocky beginning, it wouldn’t necessarily mean he was destined for failure. After all, plenty of champion boxers and World Series ball clubs were slow starters. As long as he came on strong in the final rounds or last couple innings he could emerge victorious.

  With his new outlook in mind, Tyler was determined. Up until now he had pretty much allowed his spontaneous impulses be his guide as to which woman he would ask out, aside from his friendly connections with potential donors for the hydrotherapy center.

  But now he had a different goal. The only trouble was, the waters kept getting murkier and murkier around that goal. Was he actually looking for a wife? If not, why didn’t he just wait until late August, pick some woman who looked the part, and take her to the Labor Day party? He could even offer to pay her.

  Every time he asked himself
that, a part of him threw objections back in his face. Like his mother’s keen eye being able to detect a fake date. Or the fact that his family knew the female friends he could ask for a favor. Or the insult to his pride that he would need to pay a woman to be his date. And talk about his pride—any would-be fiancée Tyler brought to his parents’ huge Labor Day party would be paraded around, gawked at, and judged by everyone in their family and business circles, so whoever he brought had better be someone he could imagine actually being the real deal.

  But he realized what a dangerous line he was walking. If he found someone he liked, was it fair to use her just to get his job back? No. Conversely, if he found someone he really liked, was he going to end up trapped in a serious relationship? That put a scare into him.

  Okay, he would have to make it clear to the woman that they were “testing the waters” of relationship territory with no hard feelings if it did not pan out. If she was on board with that, then they could just date freely—and one of those dates could be his parents’ Labor Day party.

  Now that he had that issue straight, it was time for more research. Over the past week Tyler had gone to a few events where he might meet a sensible single woman. He worked with a volunteer beach clean-up crew, went to a church flea market, joined a tour of the North Fork vineyards, went to a lecture at the local library, then a community volleyball game, even went into Manhattan to a tour at the Metropolitan Museum. He had a few brief exchanges with women, but nothing that could go anywhere and no one he would want to go there with.

  A week ago he had scheduled a meeting with the other couple Emily had recommended he talk to. After the embarrassing display he’d witnessed with the last couple, Tyler almost cancelled, but then he decided the more firsthand knowledge he had about couples under his belt, the more direct his route would be in homing in on just the right woman.

  He had already learned during their one phone call that Josh and Brook Porter had been high school sweethearts. One of those “star quarterback marries cheerleader captain” romances. The cliché was too intriguing to ignore, and they came from a town only a few miles away, so they agreed to meet at a bistro halfway in between.