Chapter 6
And then, there was John
I met John online. John was a nice looking, intelligent, and funny man. He had never been married and didn't have any children. Our first date consisted of us meeting for lunch. Right then, that day, I knew he was special and he felt the same way about me. He was already asking me out for a second date, before we even finished up our lunch. With a smile on my face, I let him know that another date sounded wonderful to me. Teasingly, I asked where he was going to take me on our second date. Grinning, he stated he had several things in mind. I knew where this was going. The sexual tension could have been cut with a knife, that day. John continually told me how beautiful I was, and always found ways, to show me how much he loved and appreciated me. He was such a gentleman, always opening doors for me, held the umbrella for me when it was raining, even opened car doors! Who does that anymore? It was truly refreshing to meet someone who was happy with their life and wanted to share it with that special someone. I guess that special someone was me. Not too long into our dating relationship, we discovered that we had fallen for one another. Often, I wondered, why I was chosen to share his life, what secrets he was keeping, because in my mind, no one was as perfect as John. Maybe he turned into a monster at night? I know one thing he didn't have. That was a low sex drive. He wanted it morning, noon and night, sometimes twice. Which was fine with me, being sexually deprived for so long and having a high sex drive myself. I needed sex more than the average person to get caught up. John would take pleasure in watching me play with myself. Sex toys, such as dildos, swings, some BDSM stuff were used, just to switch things up a bit. John's cock was very thick, seven inches long and he really knew how to use it. Unfortunately, he did have a small problem with stamina. He never lasted more than ten minutes. John attributed to my pussy being very tight. I like to do kegel exercises with my ben wa balls, got to keep it right and tight! Of course, we liked getting out and doing other things as well. We would all go to the football games and tailgate before the games with friends. Cooking, dancing, playing cards were just a few of the things that we enjoyed doing together. John and I had been together about seven months now. One night, John and I were talking about
my cousin and her husband, how he had been looking at internet porn and she had found it and he denied it all the way. It seems that it is a common problem within some relationships. I was joking with John, teasing him that he was a porn addict. He laughed it off, but something made me second guess his laughter. I knew something didn't feel right that night and felt something was going on behind my back. In my mind, I knew what I needed to do. I went to John's apartment one night, while he was working and took his laptop to a friend's place to get it checked out. Curious, I wanted to see what he had been up to, and what websites he had been on. My heart was sinking with each minute that passed by. Trying to relax, I just stayed there while my friend worked his magic. He found a bunch of things that had been erased and he was able to recover. So, John had been looking at live web cams, watching mostly females masturbate, sometimes males up to two to three times a day. He would watch it around 6am, 3:30pm, and again at 11pm. The history showed, that he never watched it if I was there. I couldn’t believe it. My perfect man did have a secret. He was a fucking porn addict! I started to cry, I was so shocked, that he was watching so much porn. There was never any clue he was watching it and that he was addicted. Thankfully, the images were only of grown adults. After I left my friend's house with Johns laptop, I took it back to his apartment and left all the history on it, so it would be the first thing he would see that night after coming home from work. He would get on the computer, watch live porn and jack off. While I was at his apartment, I took all of my belongings. I was done with him. He came home and found everything I did on the computer. The images I had left on there, the history of what I found, the websites that had links to live feeds. There was no denying it. John admitted to me, that he had a problem, when we finally sat down and talked. It didn't start out that way. He was curious, just as any man, and looking for release. It would make him feel good, so he would do it more. And that is how his addiction started. He had been addicted for about two years before he met me. I loved him so much and I wanted to help him. He begged me for another chance, would do anything to repair our broken relationship. John went to a few sex anonymous classes and got his little tokens like first time, one month, and 6 months. He went to his classes for six months and unfortunately he relapsed as sometimes recovering addicts do. I found out because I was keeping tabs on him. I had a key logger program installed on his computer to see his every move. Six months clean for him and he cracked. I found him looking at personal ads and porn right, after he watched the news and looked up all these theme park websites. I was so angry and disappointed because I loved him. But I couldn’t trust him. John sweet talked me again, making me think he would go get help and that it was going to be ok. He tried to do better and went to a couple of classes. As you noticed, I said only a couple of classes. I didn’t realize a porn addiction was so serious. Again, I stood by him, like any woman would, trying to help and save her better half. During spring break, John offered to take me on a trip. We went to Philadelphia in March of 2008, because John had a conference meeting there with work. John asked me to accompany him on his business trip. One night, during preparation for the trip, he asked if it would be ok with me, to take me to a sex club, if I felt comfortable. There was pressure, but I was a grown woman. So, I brought a sexy outfit, just in case we went. Never being at one, he really wanted to go. When we arrived at the sex swingers club, the cover charge was fifty dollars for a couple to get in. The front room consisted of a big open dance floor, tables and chairs surrounding the floor, with a stripper pole in the middle. They also had these themed rooms, like a dungeon, outer space, and one that was like a safari. These rooms were used for people to have fun sexually and live out their fantasies of voyeurism, exhibitionism and to invite people in. I knew Johns intentions for that night, was to be watched by people, while we had sex. We didn’t want to share each other with other people or invite anyone in. Everybody kept complimenting me on my dress. I wore my sexy, nice wild inspired dress. It was a beautiful pink and black, very short dress. I had my fish net tights on and my black heels on that night. It made me feel so sexy, to be dressed up and be desired. We danced, and John teasingly told me to get on the stripper pole. Not feeling really comfortable with that, I chose not to.
While our bodies were intertwined on the dance floor, he pulled my dress down and started licking and sucking on my nipples. My body was on fire, feeling like little pins and needles from the crown of my head to my tippy toes. The feeling, having my nipples and breasts sucked on, while everyone was watching was intoxicating. We made our way through the long hallway and peaked in every window of the themed rooms. It was very erotic, seeing other people indulging in open sex, people joining other couples, naked, beautiful bodies everywhere we looked. Once we made it into the outer space themed room, we put clean sheets on the bed that were provided. The room itself was really cool. The ceiling was softly illuminated with stars, planets and milky ways were painted on the wall. Some of the paint was done in black light, casting a soft glow onto the bed. John gently laid me down on my back. Starting on one leg, he took my shoe off, playfully biting my toes. Off came my stocking, with him leaving kisses and nibbles along the way. Then the other leg, shoe and stocking also came off. Lying between my legs with a grin, he reached up and raised my ass to be able to remove my panties. Off came my dress, over my head, exposing my soft, round breasts to everyone watching through the window. John reached for them, gently cupping my tits in his big hands. I got his shirt over his head, and hungry to taste him, his pants came off in one swift motion. Lying me back down on the bed, he left no area on my breasts, untouched with his tongue, teeth and lips. My head was spinning. His mouth wandered over my stomach, stopping shortly to kiss and gently bite my stomach, working his way down to my clit and now warm a
nd moist pussy. I felt warm breath right in front of my pussy lips, teasing, blowing warm breath on them. My hands were now deeply buried in his hair, bucking against his face. Abruptly, John flipped me over, and the next thing I feel, is his hard, veiny, thick cock entering me roughly from behind, all I could do, was let out a loud gasp. I know the other people watching, heard me. His hands on my hips, he proceeds to pump me hard and deep. Reaching for the pillows on the bed, I braced myself, for the rough pumping I was receiving. John was putting on a show and loved every minute of it. It was a very exciting feeling, but I felt a little naughty at the same time, like we shouldn’t be doing this. Goosebumps covered my skin, my breath quickened, as he drove his pulsating cock into my dripping hole. He leaned over to whisper what a good fuck I was, in my ear, and gave my shoulder a good bite. That ended up sending me over the edge, body exploding, surges throughout every nerve ending of my body. We collapsed onto the bed, in a heap of sweaty, slick bodies. That night was elevating and exciting. What made it better was, no one knew us there and we could act our fantasies out, like we were behind closed doors. Once I came home from our trip, I knew I needed to focus on school. It was time to end our trip and get back to our real world. Graduation was right around the corner. This is what I had been working so hard for. I had a lot of family that came in town that day to support and cheer for me. I'm so thankful my family was able to show up that day. Most importantly I had my twins there to see me graduate. I try to let them know how important school is. To see me get my bachelor’s degree made me feel like I showed them that you can do it no matter how many challenges you face in life. I felt like a great role model. John wasn’t there because he had his own graduation at a private college the same day. I was so proud of myself for one of the biggest accomplishments in my life. One of my aunts made a huge banner for me that was 30 feet long, it was so thoughtful of her. I could see my whole family as they all stood and held the banner together. A few weeks after graduation from college, John took me on another trip. I was a little hesitant, wondering where he was going to take me. We started by going to a nice breakfast in a cool part of the city, then we went to a historical house for a guided tour. Up next was an hour long wonderful massage for me. A tasting at a local winery followed. We tried a wonderful tasting Riesling, and ended up buying a bottle. An impromptu picnic on the grounds of the winery with John, made for a nice surprise. John casually mentioned that the only thing that would make the day more perfect would be if I was his wife. As I turned around to him, with shock on my face, I was greeted with him on one knee and a rose in his hand. John asked me if I will accept this rose and asked me to be his wife. The breathtaking view of the vineyard the perfect day. I accepted that rose and said yes to his proposal. He slipped a two carat, antique style ring on my finger. My eyes kept wandering to it, to marvel at its beauty and to remind myself of the love that we shared. So it was official. We were engaged and in love, next step was to move in together. So before I knew it he bought me my dream home, it was the same historical mansion I lived in before with Henry. Wow my dream home I couldn’t believe it, this was a dream. Quickly after that we planned our wedding. Our ceremony was held October 2011 at our house with family and friends in attendance. Some people came from out of town, just to be there for our special day. The colors that we picked were purple and gold. We couldn't have asked for a better day. Most of the planning set up and so forth was done by the both of us. I was so happy that we got to plan the wedding that we wanted. I even made my flowers in a bouquet with help from the bridesmaids and some other family members. By doing this we saved a lot of money. Makeup, I did myself. Kelley was my maid of honor and Hellen was the bridesmaid. My aunt's daughter was the flower girl. Our dog Smokey was the ring bearer. John didn’t have very many friends, so his step dad and uncle stood up for him during the ceremony. It was a beautiful day, and another highlight in my life. To me that’s a sign. Now that I think about it there were signs everywhere and didn’t realize them. My dress came in from China and it was hideous. It looked like it was someone’s first time sewing anything. The beads were coming off. The dress was supposed to be a V-neck and one side was bigger than the other. The stitching was horrible. The dress was just a joke. It showed up two weeks before my special day so I had to find a dress before the ceremony. That was the hardest part of the whole event. I was a part of getting the house ready. Finding a dress with a budget was hard too. I was so stressed out. I felt like I was getting gray hair right after I got it highlighted. I found the perfect one that looked like a strapless ball gown. There were a lot of beads on it that weren’t falling off. A long full skirt. It laced up the back into a nice bow. Everything ended up to be fine. We danced to our song and ate the great food that was prepared for us. We also had a bon fire going so whoever was outside could stay warm. The children there enjoyed that too.
Now it was time to go on our honeymoon. We had 2,600 dollars to take on our adventurous road trip. It wasn’t a planned trip. We knew we wanted to travel south. I knew I wanted to go to an amusement park and John loved those. He said he was addicted to those. His favorite was O***land. Our first stop was Chattanooga and we stayed at The Choo Choo Train. Our room was a real train car. There was a bottle of champagne and two champagne glasses with their logo on it that we could keep. It was romantic. That night was the first time I had an orgasm while he was giving me oral sex. We went on a big boat ride. We went to amusement park in Gatlinburg. We walked on the Application Trail. We enjoyed Mother Nature in one of the National State Parks. We made love down by this cave in the park. Next we went to Ashville North Carolina. We went to a winery and tasted some wine. We also went to a famous mansion that was decorated for Christmas and it was breathtaking. We stayed in Savannah for four days. Our first stop was this little train restaurant because John loves trains. We had breakfast there. We went to eat at a famous chef's Restaurant for dinner. Savannah is a very gorgeous city with so much history. A lot of belief in the super natural is in the area so we had to do a haunted house tour. We really had great time. We went to Tybee Island and the first day we got there, surprised to find hurricane winds so we stayed inside the hotel close to the beach. When the hurricane past the next day we went to the beach and made passionate love. That was my first time making love on the beach and it was perfect. This felt like a true honeymoon lots of fun, laughing, and sex. After Johns crazy driving we safely made it home from our adventurous honeymoon. The boys shortly, told me that they wanted to see what it was like to live with their Dad. They could live with him, but were not going to be bouncing back and forth between parents. Henry and I discussed it and came to an agreement. The boys left in November to live with their father in Indiana. Gone, was the reason for nurturing, being needed and having someone to unconditionally love and be loved by. The house was silent. This was a big change for me. I got depressed and was lost without them.
Confessions of a Secret Dominatrix Page 4