Jesse

by Reina Torres

  Jesse watched him walk the horse over to the barn, using the time to fight off his own spike of anger. He wanted to put the ass in his place, but Randy was right. He had a responsibility to remember that there were other places to film. And while the production company had done a ton of work getting everything ready to shoot, he knew it wasn’t unheard of that they might pull up stakes and move the production elsewhere if Randy had as much pull as he thought he did.

  And Jesse certainly didn’t know enough about the producers to ask them. He certainly didn’t want to cause any problems for the production company. Word like that traveled fast.

  Jesse dropped his head down until his chin rested on his chest.

  He just had to wonder how different things would’ve been if Frank was still there, where he belonged. He would be better at this.

  He wouldn’t mess up.

  He’d know exactly what to do.

  Jesse secured the gate and walked off toward the barn, ready to smile and play nice.

  ETTA

  When she peeked out from behind the curtain in her motel room window, she had to admit she was a big ol’ scaredy cat. She looked up one side of the parking lot and down to the other before she stepped out. Jesse’s truck wasn’t at the laundromat.

  With a rush of air through her parted lips, Etta grabbed up her small bundle of laundry and headed over.

  Betty didn’t even look up when Etta pushed through the door. She kept her head down over her sewing. “Long time no see, Etta.”

  “I’ve been busy. Sorry. I get back from the set and it’s all I can do to drag myself into the shower and then back out again.”

  “Mmm hmm.” Betty’s voice was softened. “Jesse was here last night.”

  “Oh?” Etta swallowed loud enough that she was sure Betty heard her. “Did you?” She winced at the little squeak in her voice.

  “Yes,” Betty laughed, unrepentant, “I did. And I asked him why he didn’t bring you with him.”

  Etta turned a little as she shoved her clothes into the washer, hoping that Betty didn’t see the blush on her cheeks. “Well-”

  “He said that you were busy.”

  “Really?” Etta’s hands stilled on the edge of the washer.

  “Mmm hmm.” Betty’s chair squeaked on the floor as she talked. “He didn’t look happy when he said it.”

  Something rolled over inside of Etta’s middle. She couldn’t identify the feeling or where it came from. “Did he say what was wrong?”

  She felt Betty’s hand on her shoulder before she heard the woman’s words. “Jesse’s a quiet one when something is bothering him. He’ll try to say everything is okay so it’s no use asking him the question straight out when he’s in a mood like that. Sometimes you just have to talk and get him to answer something until you can find a way to slip inside and get to the heart of it.”

  Etta put the handfuls of clothing in the machine and then tackled the detergent.

  “You’re going to make me ask, aren’t you?”

  Betty laughed and the sound helped ease some of Etta’s worry. “I’m not a gossip… all the time.”

  “Some of the time?” Betty’s laughter reached her as Etta put her coins in the machine and pushed the button to start. Almost immediately she heard the rush of water into the machine. She turned, putting her back to the machines. “Okay, I’ll ask. What did he say?”

  Betty raised an artfully plucked brow. “It’s not going to be that easy.” She gestured to the counter where they’d all sat on her first night in Golden Valley. “Have a seat in my office.”

  What did Etta have to lose? She still had to wait for the washer. Crossing to the counter, she sat down and a moment later, Betty was sitting down a few feet away, pouring them both a cup of tea from her little brass pot.

  “So tell me, how are you, Etta?”

  She tried to think of something simple to say. Sum things up in a couple of words. Instead, Etta folded her hands and laid them on the tabletop. “I don’t know. Things have been… confusing.”

  “Mmm Hmm.” Betty held her teacup in her hands. “About what?”

  Etta looked into her cup at the warm ochre color of the tea. There were so many things she could focus on, but really it all boiled down to one thing, whether it had to do with Jesse or Randy it was all about, “Men.”

  Betty held up a hand, got up and brought back a plate full of delicious buttery cookies. When she set it down between them, Betty smiled at her. “If it’s about men, we’re going to need a little sugar to compliment the sour.”

  Etta almost smiled as she reached for a cookie. Turning it around in her hand she sat there, looking at it. “Where should I start?”

  Pointing at the cookie, Betty sighed. “Take a bite and tell me what’s the first thing on your mind.”

  The cookie looked delicious, but she just couldn’t even take a bite and talk. “You’ve known Jesse for a while.”

  Betty’s eyes widened and she set her teacup down. “Since we started the laundromat here. He was just a young man when we met.”

  “I need to know,” she blew out a breath, trying to settle her nerves, “have you ever known him to be mean?” When Betty didn’t immediately answer her question, she looked up at the other woman and tried to read her expression. It was an odd combination of shock and something else that Etta didn’t understand. “I’m not saying he is. It’s just that someone came to me and they said… well, the things they said didn’t seem like Jesse. But he was so sure and he seemed like he was saying the truth. He had this kind of conviction in his tone, you know?” Etta looked back down at the cookie in her hand and shook her head. “I can’t believe I even asked that question. He’s not mean, right? I mean, at least that’s what I think.

  “Then again, I haven’t always been right in the past and it’s not like I have a whole lot of experiences with men and it’s just crazy that I can feel tangled up inside like this. Right?”

  Betty could only blink back for a moment. “Goodness gracious, Etta. I’d say tangled up is a good description.

  Etta felt her shoulders sag. “That’s the problem. I met Randy Calhoun and he invited me out to dinner.”

  “Dinner? Did you go?”

  It was strange. Betty’s question wasn’t colored with shock or disappointment or anything more than just curiosity. She treated the question like it was commonplace… and maybe it was. Etta had been so wrapped up in her worries, the simple act had taken on a monster of an appearance in her thoughts. “I went. I thought it was so crazy and exciting too! He’s a star in Hollywood, but he asked me out and he told me to…” Etta let the thought fade out right there. She didn’t want to tell Betty everything that happened. She was still too embarrassed to put it all into words. At least, the details. “Have you ever known someone who compliments you one moment and then he… they say something that’s kind of mean?”

  Betty broke off a piece of the cookie and set the rest down on her napkin. “Not me,” she replied, “but I had a friend who was seeing a man and what he did sounded just like what you’re saying. A man should be kind and considerate of your feelings. It sounds like this… man, if you can call him such, isn’t someone who values you as a person if he’s mean to you.”

  Etta started to argue, but Betty cut her off with a look.

  “Especially, if he’s showing an interest in you. Can you imagine,” Betty’s tone had risen a few notes higher, “if you were to spend more and more time with him? Do you think he’ll get better with you? Or worse?”

  There wasn’t a way to argue those facts with Betty.

  Or anyone else.

  Hearing her explain things, Etta could only think about her father and how his words of praise, or even just his kind words had given way to his criticisms through the years. Even when she’d confronted him over and over, begging him to reconsider how he spoke to her and treated her, he hadn’t changed. He’d just set his foot down and dug in deeper.

  How could she expect Randy to be any di
fferent?

  Etta felt the color drain from her face.

  Betty reached across the table and touched her hand. “Breathe, sweetie.”

  Nodding, Etta wet her lips and swallowed a breath. “Okay. I’m… okay.” She said the word, but she wasn’t quite sure she meant it. So maybe it was a goal instead of where she was, but that was okay, too.

  “It was a sobering thought.”

  Betty smiled at her. “You weren’t talking about Jesse, were you?”

  “No.” That answer was immediate. And true. “No, he and I haven’t really talked much.”

  “Ah,” Betty sat back in her chair. “That’s some of what I heard last night.”

  “I saw him… hugging someone.”

  Her words shook Betty. That was easy to see.

  “I thought,” Etta hesitated before she continued, “that you would know if he was… dating someone?”

  “Well,” Betty took another sip of her tea, “I actually thought he’d be dating you by now, sweetheart.”

  “Me?” Etta was almost dizzy when the color rushed back into her face, warming her cheeks. “I mean, I was hoping, but… things got busy for him and for me. And then I saw him… and her. And I felt like I couldn’t breathe- but it wasn’t his fault or hers. I mean I just got here and sure I think he’s attractive and sweet and warm…”

  Etta dropped the cookie down on her napkin and touched her hand to the side of her face, feeling the heat of her flushed cheeks against her palms. “It’s stupid, I’m sorry to bother you with-”

  “Aiya-” Betty fussed at her. “Give me a minute to get a word in, hmm?”

  When Etta managed to remain silent, Betty picked up again.

  “This girl that Jesse was with, did he give you a name?”

  “I didn’t stay. I didn’t want to… interrupt.”

  Betty rolled her eyes. “You should ask him. I think you’d be surprised.” Etta opened her mouth to speak but Betty held up her hand. “I don’t know who she is, but I think I might have an idea. But,” she gave Etta a stern look, “you’d have to find out her name first. I think you really need to talk to him about this and things… I believe… will work out just fine.”

  Etta wanted to believe too. She really did.

  Still, there was one thought that sat squarely in the way of her path moving forward. “I need to talk to Randy first.” She saw Betty’s look of concern. “I want to thank him for taking me out to dinner, but I want him to know that it won’t happen again. Then again, maybe he’s already come to that conclusion.”

  “Oh?”

  Etta felt like her cheeks were on fire, but she spoke anyway. Best to get it all out in the open. “He tried to kiss me, to get me to take him into my room, but I told him no. I left the car and went into my room alone.” She tried to ignore the pictures in her head, the memories that flooded forward. “He wasn’t happy with me.”

  “It sounds to me like you already knew it wasn’t going to work.”

  Nodding, Etta agreed. “I think I just needed to have your opinion. I needed to know I wasn’t completely stupid.”

  Betty set aside her sewing and smiled. “Actually, I think that maybe you’re smarter than you give yourself credit for. If you need to talk to the other man, do it, but don’t put off talking to Jesse for too long. Hmm?”

  Returning Betty’s smile, Etta picked up her cookie and inhaled the delicious scent. “Thank you, Betty. I really needed someone to talk to.”

  Betty’s tanned cheeks warmed with color. “I’m always here, sweetheart. Any time you need me.”

  JESSE

  Call him crazy, but Jesse had a feeling that Etta was somewhere, thinking of him.

  Okay, maybe call it wishful thinking.

  But he was certainly thinking about her.

  Supper had been an exercise in utter frustration. He knew his parents not only noticed it, they felt it too. How could they not. Whenever Jesse would notice Etta, she turned her gaze down to her plate and if he felt the pull of her eyes on him, he’d do the same.

  And, when Jesse was in the kitchen, helping his mother with the dishes, Etta got in her car and left.

  Jesse knew he should have gone to bed because he had an early morning meeting with the stunt coordinator, but there he was sitting on the porch in his mother’s rocking chair, staring out down the road. There wasn’t much he could see, but there was enough moonlight visible to make the whole view glow like it was in a fairytale.

  The screen door squeaked open and closed before his father sat on his chair and slipped back into the seat with a sigh. “I know you said that things were going better with that Calhoun boy. Were you telling us the truth or trying to make us feel better?”

  “Well, hello to you too, dad.”

  “Don’t sass me, Jesse. I’m too old to waste time on niceties that don’t mean much in the long run.

  ”I wasn’t sassing you. Or, maybe I was, but everything’s… better. It really is. He’s doing more work.”

  “More work,” his father had always been incredibly good at reading between the lines. “That means that he could be doing more.”

  Jesse nodded. “He could, and that’s why I’m meeting with the stunt coordinator so we can discuss what I need to continue working on. Hopefully once we figure out what I need to focus on, I can work on other things.”

  Striking a match in the darkness, Holt lit his pipe and sat back in his own rocking chair. “After that rather entertaining supper, I’m guessing you haven’t had a chance to work things out with Etta?”

  Jesse swallowed against the knot in his throat. “It’s obvious, I guess.”

  “Plain easy to see you two are tied up in knots.” Holt’s laughter was a warm chuckle in the darkness. “I remember when Frank was just starting out with Alice. He had his moments of tearing his hair out and shoving his boots in his mouth.”

  Jesse laughed at the memories that his father’s voice stirred up in his mind. His brother had been so sure that Alice would fall at his feet, but she was the one who led him on a chase. And Alice was the one who settled Frank down and helped him focus his life.

  “But he grew up fast because of her too.” Jesse blinked, willing the tears that sprung up in his eyes to fade away. “He wanted to marry her.”

  A moment of silence passed between them. “You know that, son?”

  “He took me over to Olsen’s Jewelry and we looked at hundreds of rings.” The tears refused to back down and leave him be. “He was going to buy one when he got back from Vietnam.”

  Jesse couldn’t tell if his father had coughed or cleared his throat, he could barely hear the rough scratch of sound.

  “Your mother and I had wondered about that.”

  “Part of me wished he’d married her before he went, but it might have been harder on her to be a widow now.” He felt a muscle tick in his jaw as he continued to fight off the tears threatening to fall. “But I’m glad she’s coming back to work catering with us. Anything I can do to help her, I’m going to. Frank would have wanted it. I’m glad she feels comfortable enough to spend time here with us. With the family. I’ll always consider her part of the Sutton family.”

  “Son…”

  Jesse tensed knowing that his father was about to impart some of his patented wisdom.

  “I know that ever since you were a little boy, you’ve known how important this place is to our family, but I want you to know that it’s not everything. If I didn’t have your mother or you and… and your brother...”

  Jesse saw how much his father still hurt over the loss of his brother and he reached out, setting his hand on Holt’s shoulder. “I know. You’ve always been the rock of our family.”

  His father pushed back on his heel and leaned his rocking chair all the way back on its runner. “Are you saying I’ve got a hard head?”

  Jesse didn’t manage to smother his laugh but he was thankful it came out more like a cough. “Sure, if you say so.”

  Holt wagged a finger at his son.
“Just remember the apple, err… Ah! I’ve got it. Just remember that the you’re just a chip off this old blockhead.”

  Jesse held up his hands in surrender. “You got me there.”

  Holt nodded, a satisfied look on his face. “Don’t you forget it.”

  They sat silent beside each other for a long moment, with Jesse rocking slowly back and forth as he looked out over the ranch that had been his home all of his life. Sure, he understood that family came first and he’d never doubted his father’s dedication to both the family and the ranch.

  He also knew how important their continued success was to more than just his family. The Sagebrush Motel owed most of its business to the ranch. The surrounding town could count on a big boost in revenue with every motion picture that was made there.

  Jesse knew all too well what their continued success meant to Gold Valley and he wasn’t about to do anything to damage that. And things between him and Etta were awkward, not because of the production or his need to keep things running smoothly. Why? He didn’t know, but he doubted he was going to get that figured out anytime soon.

  Or, at all.

  He knew what he needed to do, and that was focus on what he needed to do.

  To take care of his family.

  When that was squared away, then maybe, he’d try to figure out how to expand that family. His heart just kept hoping that when the time came, Etta would still be around.

  The other rocking chair creaked and Jesse turned his head to find Holt looking him straight in the eye. “Son, I can hear the gears turning in your head. And just so you know… they could use a little oil. Some of them are rusty as hell. But, I’m sittin’ out here trying to enjoy some quiet, so do me a favor and go take a walk or something.”

  With that pronouncement, he leaned back and closed his eyes.

  Jesse stayed there for a moment trying to decide what to do first.

  His father cleared his throat. “I know you’re still there, son.”

  Grabbing the arms of the chair, Jesse got his boots under him, stood up and went back inside. He’d go and take a walk, but he needed to hug his mother, first.