Reed (A Redemption Romance Book 5)

by Anna Scott

  A single tear trailed down my cheek before I could stop it, as I considered the reasons that two nights in a row, I would go to bed alone and what that meant for the future I thought we were building.

  About three hours after the cafe opened the next day, I glanced up when I heard the bell over the door chime and stared into the smiling face of my mother. My eyes widened with shock as I noticed my dad walking in behind her. I shook myself from my spot as I noticed my dad pause just inside the door, wipe his feet on the mat and dip his head to take his hat off. It was the same movement I had seen him do thousands of times before and the same thing Reed did every time he walked inside too. The similarity was so strong, it brought a lump to my throat. I'd worked hard all day to keep my tears at bay and I couldn't start balling now, not in front of my parents.

  "Mama, daddy!" I exclaimed, plastering a surprised but happy smile onto my face as I rounded the counter to greet them.

  "Hello my precious Gillian, are you surprised? You look surprised," my mother chimed as she pulled me into her strong arms. Precious - damn this was hard. Why did everything have to remind me of him? He hadn't come to bed before I feel asleep the night before and when I woke that morning, I realized that yet again, he hadn't pulled me into his arms. He also hadn't reached out to me, and whatever was going on, I didn't intend to extend that olive branch. He was the one who had cut me out, so he would have to lower that wall he built and let me back in, if that was what he wanted to do.

  "Hey daddy," I said as my father pulled me into his still strong arms and wrapped me in his warm and loving embrace. There was never a time in my life when I questioned my father's fierce love for me, or his willingness to do anything he could to provide for our family. He was older now, in his late fifties and though his health had begun to fail him, he was fit. No matter how much my mother fried his food in butter in the years before his heart condition, his middle never expanded thanks to the endless hours of grueling work he did. On our farm he worked countless hours in the barn, or in the field. Since they had retired, my mom complained that dad still wouldn't be still, he kept their yard immaculately cut and even kept up the maintenance for two of their neighbors, both older widows who weren't able to keep up with their homes.

  Why my parents were in the cafe just then, I didn't know, but I had a sneaking suspicion that it was about Kelly. Mom had hinted that she wanted to be with me to help out, had even suggested that I bring Kelly to them. I knew their intentions were good, but I didn't need them to take over my life. Things were so up in the air with Reed, I had no idea how their presence would affect that either.

  After glancing around the mostly empty seating area, my dad suggested that we go in the back to talk. Clark was up front and the morning rush had died down, so I agreed and followed them.

  "We came down to help you," my mother explained and when my surprise morphed to confused, she continued, "with Kelly and with the cafe. It's all too much for you, you know." My mother's words caused me to step back and look at her more closely. What did she mean it was too much for me? It wasn't. I thought that she was trying to sound concerned for me, but instead she sounded condescending. She could be like that, had definitely put me in my place over the years, but usually it wasn't in front of my dad, he was the only one who had ever stood up for me. His corrections to his wife were small, "now dear," or "honey, that's not necessary," things like that, but at least it was something, right?

  "It isn't mama, it's not even that hard. Kelly is a wonderful little girl, and though she's had a few hard times, waking in the night looking for her mother, we're managing very well."

  "Yes, dear but the cafe and everything, you're not used to so much hard work." My father's patronizing tone grated and I could have sworn it was my brother's words coming from his mouth. My brother was an asshole and honestly, I hated him. For whatever reason, when I was born he decided that he would despise me, would be jealous of any attention I got and would do his level best to show me up at every turn. Apparently, I assumed that even included filling my parents' heads full of all this nonsense. Dad's words hurt though, coming from him, I didn't understand it. Did he think so little of me too? I wasn't even sure my mother liked me as a person, but my father, not him. My battered heart was breaking again, and I didn't know how much more devastation I could take. Not only their words, but the looks of reproach and disapproval on their faces were enough to wound me deeply.

  "I'm sorry, what?" Thankfully, I was able to find some indigence and laced my words with disbelief staring into the face of the man that I thought would always love me.

  "You know; you've always had us around to help you. You didn't have to support yourself or take care of yourself, and we didn't want you to fail with Kelly, there's too much on the line now."

  As my vision blurred, a red haze began to creep into my periphery and I stared in shock at the woman I had once respected, I had once loved and in that moment questioned everything they had ever taught me, everything I had ever believed about them. Did they really think so little of me? Did they truly not see any of my accomplishments? Did they see me at all?

  "Mama, I think you need to replay the things you just said, you need to hear those things and consider them from my perspective. If you truly meant them, if you both believe that about me, then I think we need to have a different kind of conversation." I worked hard to maintain my calm, to keep my cool and no matter what I had been through before in my life, keeping it together was one of the hardest things I had ever done.

  I was raw with all I was feeling for Reed and all my concerns about what he may or may not be feeling for another woman. I was still grief stricken at the loss of my cousin and stressed with my new duties as caretaker and guardian of her daughter. I was worried about whatever danger Reed thought we may or may not be in. All of that didn't help the situation I was in with my parents.

  "What your mother means is that you've never had all this responsibility, sweetheart. You don't have kids and you are working so much in the cafe and you're so young."

  Before he could go on and say anything else in that condescending tone, I broke in and stopped him. "I don't want to hear what you think my mother meant when she told me that I've never taken care of myself. Nor do I want to hear what you think she meant by saying that I would fail Kelly. What I would like you both to hear and try to pull out of your memories is that I have been working in the cafe since I was fourteen years old. I have worked hard, while going to school and keeping a perfect GPA. I haven't taken one cent from either of you since the day I turned eighteen, I have helped you at the drop of a hat. I have worked sixteen hour days, have maintained my college classes and have done all that while supporting myself. I have never, not once failed at anything except, apparently earning your respect. If you would like to take this time to go and consider all that you've said and all that I've said, before any more things are spoken that can never be taken back I'd like you to do that somewhere else. I still have a full day of work to finish before I go home and take care of the little girl I begged you both to help me get custody of for the past year and a half. Her mother, I'll remind you that I begged you to help. I tried to help Missy as best as I could, driving through the night after working and attending classes to be by her side when she needed me. I told you that things weren't right and you ignored me. So now, please, you need to leave here so that I can work and give us both some time to reflect on all you've said."

  "Don't speak to your father that way, young lady. This is still our business. You have no right to behave that way."

  I stared at my mother, the woman who raised me, the woman who I had done everything I possibly could do to please and wondered just when I had decided to idolize her. She had been somewhat affectionate as a mother, but thinking back, she hadn't protected me from the insults hurled at me by my brother. She hadn't scolded him when he pushed me or tripped me as a child. I'd been eight years younger than him and as far back as I could remember, he was the golden boy, thei
r perfect son and I was the afterthought. How had I misunderstood our relationship so much? Why had I tried so hard to be perfect in their eyes?

  Nodding to her, I kept my expression blank and moved my hands around my back to untie the apron I had on. In their eyes, I was only an employee. They hadn't put the cafe in my name, but I had been left in charge of it. They hadn't taken much from it, aside from a small monthly allotment, which I considered their retirement, but they never truly passed it down to me, as my father had alluded to when they moved.

  Since that was the case, maybe I shouldn't have given up my own dreams to help them, I should have stayed my path and finished school on time. I should have taken the internships I had been offered at the large animal clinic outside of town. I should have done a great many things and not what my thankless parents thought that I should do.

  I laid the apron on the work counter and turned toward the office without a word. I moved through the door, unlocked the bottom drawer and picked up my purse, sliding the shop keys off the ring, I sat them on the desk, and walked to the back door, all while staying emotionless and completely silent.

  "What are you doing?" My father asked, a deep and angry rumble in his voice. I had never heard him speak to me in that tone before, he had allowed my mother's disapproval countless times throughout my life, but he hadn't belittled me or demeaned my work. He hadn't acted angry or disappointed in me either, and never once had he reminded me that Cafe Fantasia was his business and not mine. His words hurt me more than my mother ever could.

  Without turning to face them, I answered, "I'm leaving your business and going to take care of my own." Without another word, I opened the back door and felt the warm sun on my face as I moved through it, letting it close behind me. I didn't know if I would ever go back to the cafe but if my parents really meant all that they had said, the bigger question was if I would have any more to do with them.

  I drove the few blocks home feeling nothing but numbness. I should have gone to get Kelly, but I needed to do something else first. I jogged down the steps to the basement, where my filling cabinet and desk were since Reed and I had moved it out of Kelly's new room and found the deed to the house. I let out a sigh of relief when I read my name, and only mine. My mamaw had left me the house, and though my brother had been ticked about it, my parents hadn't said a word. Adam had wanted to sell it and thought I should do that and split the money with him, but in an uncharacteristic show of self-preservation I had refused. I didn't have a mortgage, my car was paid for and I didn't carry any debt to speak of. The money in my savings account wasn't shabby, and I figured that it would just have to see Kelly and me through until I figured things out.

  Alone in my empty house, I realized that Blazer wasn't inside. Strange, I thought, and wandered to the back door. I opened it and looked outside. He wasn't out there either. Very strange. Worried, I hurriedly walked back to the kitchen table, picked up my phone and dialed Reed. After two rings I was sent to voicemail. His phone wasn't turned off, if it were, I would have gone straight to the voicemail system and if he let it ring, it would have taken several rings, not just two. Pondering the situation, I had to wonder why he had declined my call. In the midst of the confusion though, I was too worried about Blazer so I decided to send a text in case he was in the middle of something at work.

  Gillian:Hey, Blazer isn't here. Do you have him?

  It was an interminable eight minutes before my phone dinged with his reply.

  Reed:Yes

  Yes? That was it, that was all? Obviously, with the strain between us the past couple of days, I didn't have a clue what was going through is head, but with the heart wrenching drama I had just experienced with my parents, I wasn't in the market for any more. Before I allowed myself to break down, I sent one final text to the man I had stupidly allowed myself to fall in love with.

  Gillian:Good. My parents are in town so you need to stay at your place for a while.

  Short and simple. No, I didn't have any intention of having my parents stay at the house with me, after their display at the cafe, I had no interest in hearing what they really thought of me again, but Reed didn't need to know that. Regardless, if they decided to show up early in the morning, I wasn't going to be in the position of having them question why I had a man at the house, a man they hadn't ever met before. Sure, I had told them about Reed, had told them that we were dating, but I wouldn't ever tell them that he had been staying with me and Kelly all night.

  In some ways, I was still that little girl, longing for the unconditional love and approval of her parents, and in others I was a disillusioned woman who had just had the curtains pulled back, allowing the light to flood in and illuminate even the darkest of secrets. My brother had been vile to me all my life, and as far as I knew, the only thing I ever did was be born. My parents had been loving but judgmental of any choices I made that weren't in line with what they wanted me to do. They weren't abusive, but my brother was, and my mother at least looked the other way. I remembered her even telling me that it was just him teasing me, that it was normal for siblings to quarrel. For me, it had been a lot more than that. I didn't need people in my life that made me feel bad, that made me feel like less than worthy of their love and respect.

  With that thought in mind, my phone dinged again. Glancing down at the screen, I saw that it was Reed, I wasn't surprised, but I couldn't get a feeling for whatever he was planning to say. Was there an underlying message in all this?

  Reed:Fine, but we need to talk.

  Gillian:Not now, I'm not up to it today. Maybe next week sometime.

  Instead of another text alert, my phone rang in my hand. I had been waiting for his response, trying to discern what we needed to talk about, but not wanting to know. I knew I had to face it. I was pretty sure he was about to break things off with me. It would hurt, but I figured my day already sucked pretty bad so why not make it that much worse.

  "Hey," I said nervously into the phone.

  "Next week?" His voice was deceptively calm, I knew that putting it off that long was immature of me, but I was on the edge here. I didn't know how much more I could take.

  "Yeah, Reed, next week or, I don't know, next month, whatever."

  "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Seriously? I knew that I had been bitchy, but he hadn't spoken more than a few words to me in days, so he could just suck it up as far as I was concerned.

  "Unless you have something to say to me right now, get on with what you wanted. I need to get Kelly."

  "Fucking hell," he muttered, and was quiet for almost a full minute before speaking again. "Have you gotten any more strange calls?"

  "What? No, not that I know of." It was surprising, since the night that Reed had answered, the hang ups had all but stopped. After whatever that was with his ex, I hadn't given it much thought. I had honestly been waiting for him to end things right then on the phone, so his abrupt subject change took me by surprise.

  "Good, I need you to be watchful of your surroundings and be sure to keep the alarm set at all times. When you're out driving, or walking to your car, be sure to keep an eye out for anyone that might be following you. If you see anyone, drive straight to the police department."

  "Do you think there is a serious threat?"

  "Not sure, but yeah, and obviously someone knows enough about you to get your unlisted home phone number. He also knows where you work, so someone could approach you there."

  A chill swept down my spine, just thinking about someone following me and Kelly. I hated to consider who it might be and what they wanted with me. I didn't know who Kelly's father was, but I did know that Missy had been into something bad.

  "Fine," I agreed, without giving into my vulnerability, with the way things were between us, I had no intention of showing him that side of me.

  "Look, I have to work tonight, so you spend some time with your folks. Can they take care of Kelly in the morning?"

  "Probably, but I don't need them to, I'm not going in tomorrow."<
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  "Oh, okay, well that's good. Then have fun and I'll catch up with you later."

  "I thought you wanted to talk about something." Yeah, I knew I was sending him mixed messages, but now I just wanted to get this crap over with. The last thing I needed to do was drag this thing out anymore.

  "Yeah, I needed to know about the calls. I didn't see any on the phone log, but wanted to be sure, and to tell you about being careful." Reed's tone was flat, and completely lacked emotion.

  "Whatever," I replied, petulant. Just as I was pulling the phone away from my ear to hand up, I heard him respond distractedly.

  "Look, I've gotta run."

  It might have been petty and childish, but I just hung up, didn't say okay or good bye or anything, I just hung up the phone. Whatever, I was in no mood to figure out Reed's head, I couldn't even figure out my own.

  I gave myself an hour of wallowing before I went to get Kelly. Sitting on the couch in my front room, I listened to the silence of the empty house and gave into the tears I had been holding off. Sobbing into the quilt my great-aunt Catherine made before I was born, I inhaled the scent, remembering the old smells of lemon polish my mamaw used, remembered the lavender water she used when she ironed and thought about the sugar cookies with pink icing she used to make for me when I was little. I remembered how her arms felt as she held me right there on the couch as I cried, when my brother was mean, when my mother pushed me away, when my father ignored it all, she had been there to comfort me and offer me her comfort, her unconditional love.

  After a while, I pulled myself together, washed my face and went to get my girl.

  "Hey there," Aurora greeted me as she opened her door wide, when I went to get Kelly from her place.

  "How are you feeling?" I asked Aurora as she held the screen door open for me to enter. Her shrewd gaze didn't miss anything and I was positive that she could see the turmoil on my face. Luckily, she didn't comment on it. Just with the things she knew about, it would be reasonable that I would have difficult days, and there was no reason to burden her with all the rest. I knew how close she and Reed were, they were like best friends and I couldn't be sure that whatever I said to her wouldn't get back to him.