A Magnetic Couple Dilemma (Unfinished Liaisons Series)

by Rorrete, Naaju

  A MAGNETIC COUPLE DILEMMA

  By

  Naaju Rorrete

  Copyright © 2012 by Naaju Rorrete

  All rights reserved.

  Except for some quotes used in reviews, this book may not be reproduced in whole or in part by any means, today known or invented in the future, without written permission from the author.

  This book is fiction. The characters, names, events and places, are the product of the author's imagination and utilized fictitiously, so any resemblance to actual persons, alive or deceased, or to any business, is entirely coincidental.

  Cover Copyright © 2012 by Naaju Rorrete

  The images depicted in the book cover are used under a non-exclusive license granted by Scarlett O'Hara Photographics S.L. All models were over the age of eighteen years at the time of the creation of such depictions. All appropriate records, including model release and photo ID's are kept in the office of Scarlett O'Hara S.L. Apt 29, 03580 Alfas Del Pi, Valencia, Spain.

  Acknowledgments

  Thanks to Issa, whose impressive prompt urged me to write this story, one that had been lurking in my mind for a while, but I avoided writing until now, due to the emotional investing it meant to me. I'm glad I finally did it. The warmest thanks to Stacy Jo, who generously dedicated countless hours to copy-edit this book. I want to show my deep appreciation to Barb and Jackie for their excellent work proofreading this book. Also, lovingly thanks to Pat, who, besides being my cheerleader and always believed in me, provided professional insight about the HIV environment too.

  My eternal gratitude to the staff of the Goodreads M/M Romance group, for holding the 2012 "Love is Always Write" event, where this book originated, as part of a collection of a hundred and fifty free M/M short stories, novellas and novels. Joining the group will allow you to read all those stories and much more, but mainly, you will find like-minded friends. Extra special thanks to Jen, who has been so understanding with me during the whole process of creating this book.

  And last but not least, to my beloved Fernando, who died of AIDS in 2009. I will always remember you for being the kindest soul I've ever met, and my only regret is not having spent more time with you. This one is for you.

  Table of Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Epilogue

  About The Author

  Chapter 1

  Esteban pulled the letter from his frock pocket for the countless time and skimmed over it until finding those paragraphs that, no matter how many occasions he read it, were hard to disregard and have affected his life forever.

  It was as if Mauricio whispered the words into his ear. "Esteban, if you are reading this, I'm already dead. It was my final wish that you receive this letter as soon as I passed away. In truth, I hoped to live many years, but this illness is treacherous and there is a trap every step of the way."

  Shaking his head, Esteban grimaced. God! Mauricio was dead.

  He had been dead for nearly a year, but Esteban couldn't accept his loss. It was so hard to imagine his wayward friend gone. This last letter came as a total surprise, because Esteban had visited him while Mauricio was still alive, and thought everything had been said between them. Their peace settled, no regrets, apparently. Even though Esteban had many, he acted as if there were none for his beloved friend's benefit. Now, there was not even a tomb to pay his respects, because Mauricio arranged to be cremated and his ashes scattered at sea.

  Only his letters, especially this one, were his comfort and his torment.

  Avoiding the sentimentality that overcame him every time he'd read the letter, he reread his favorite part. "Don't feel sorry for me, I'm leaving at peace without any regrets, because I've lived a fulfilled life during these years. I experienced the greatest pleasures, happiness, and adventures. If I could turn back time, I would once again choose to live only twenty-two more years after leaving the seminary, rather than sixty as a priest. Yes, I'd rather die today knowing there was nothing I didn't experience once, than living until my nineties keeping those stupid vows."

  Pausing, Esteban inhaled deeply before he kept reading, and then he skipped to the last part, which had worried him since the first time he'd read it. "My only concern is not having taken better care of Javier. I gave him this virus unaware of doing so, and even though he is still healthy, that could change overnight if he doesn't take care of himself.

  Please, Esteban, look after him. He could lose his mind after my death, even try something terrible, because he doesn't know how to live without me. I taught him everything he knows. He'd left his overprotective family to move in with me, so he doesn't have any idea of how to live by himself. I already asked my brother to help you in being sure Javier is okay, but Diego has too many people under his responsibility. I know you are also busy, but this might be a case of life and death, and Javier is too young to die."

  A shy knock on the door jolted Esteban, he'd barely had time to hide the letter before Sister Lupe entered the room.

  "Father, I know you said not to bother you, but your brother, the one that looks like a gangster, is outside."

  Before Esteban could reply, said brother announced himself behind her. "I heard that."

  She jumped, and got closer to Esteban, who remained seated at his desk.

  The six feet plus of Raul Hidalgo invaded his office, dressed in an expensive but tacky leather suit, even a humble girl like Lupe could see as such. She associated him with the kind of dark men she'd known in her native Mexico, maybe because Raul had the same arrogant expression and impertinent eyes.

  Esteban told her, "It's okay, Sister Lupe, I asked him to come over."

  Raul looked down at her. "I don't deal drugs, but if you switch careers, I could have a dancing pole ready for you."

  When she scowled and lifted her head as if he couldn't scare her, he added, lowering his voice, "I'd personally train you."

  After that, she managed to hasten out of the room.

  "Raul, please!"

  "What? She called me gangster and you said nothing."

  "If you stop dressing like that maybe she wouldn't call you names."

  "She would look great on a dancing pole, you know."

  "She's a nun, Raul, stop being nasty."

  "What have you done this time, Esteban?"

  Raul dropped the newspaper over the desk while citing, "Archdiocese expels stellar attorney Father Hidalgo."

  He paused, and when Esteban didn't say anything asked, "What happened, man?"

  Esteban frowned, and picking up the paper, read some of the printed words.

  "It's only baloney. I've not been defrocked, and they know nothing about it."

  Afterward, he tossed the paper inside the wastebasket, where he was putting the stuff he had cleared from his desk.

  "Well, I'm asking you, because you sure know, right?"

  Esteban met the gaze so similar to his own, an unusual dark green that most members of the Hidalgo family had.

  "I withdrew as counselor and asked for a few days leave of absence, but in the last few hours, I decided that I'm leaving the priesthood. So, my voluntary request to be laicized has been sent."

  Raul looked at him speechless for a few seconds, and Esteban went back to finish cleaning his desk while waiting for his brother to process the news. Raul combed his short hair with both hands, still looking at his brother in awe.

  "Oh, man. I didn't hear that. Well, at least, I'm
not the one telling the family."

  The tradition in the Hidalgo family was that the firstborn male joined the Catholic Church, while the second son ran the diverse family businesses, which had never been all legal. Knowing he would feel miserable representing certain aspects of those businesses, Esteban begged Raul to switch with him since his brother enjoyed the power and the thrill, of running the thin line between crime and legality.

  Raul and he were so different, but his twin brother had always been protective of him, even when he'd disapproved of his choices.

  "There is no need, Raul, I will tell them when I'm ready. I'm telling you now, so you don't waste your time trying to change my mind."

  "Why, Esteban? If you didn't want to represent the church in this case, you could have asked Uncle Rob to bail you out."

  Uncle Rob was also known as Cardinal Jose Roberto Hidalgo, their father's older brother, who already had an office at the Vatican, and who Esteban had always respected, but whose influence he didn't want at the moment.

  "It's not only this case, and it's not the church, it's me. Speaking of our Eminence, you have to convince Dad not to call him until there is nothing he can do about it."

  "Phew! He's Uncle Rob for me, I don't care if he wears a black and red dress. I remember he's cool."

  "Then your job is easier—keep him out of my business."

  "Easier said than done, by now Dad called him for sure, next thing you will be sent to one of those Jesuit seminars, and will come back more papist than the Pope. It happened every time you tried to quit."

  Esteban considered for a second telling Raul about the way Mauricio's death affected him, but it would have meant telling his brother about Mauricio's sexuality, something he had hid from Raul until his death. Instead, Esteban told him.

  "Not this time."

  "The archbishop called Dad, and they had a long talk in Spanish; you know what that means right?"

  "It's simply politics; besides, if you knew what happened why are you asking me?"

  "Not really, all I heard is you beat the hell out of the defendant you were supposed to represent."

  "I didn't hit him."

  "Dad said that the only reason the man didn't file charges is because he didn't want more press. Come on, tell me what got into you?"

  "From the start, I pleaded to our Excellency not to include me in the defense team, but he insisted that I do, at least, the depositions."

  "And?"

  "While recording some of the testimonies, I have no doubt the plaintiff is telling the truth. The priest we've been ordered to represent is guilty, and I can't defend that man. Besides, I'm sure the jury will perceive the same I did."

  Raul stirred both arms in the air.

  "Jesus, Esteban, you might be a lawyer and a Jesuit priest, but you are also the most naive person I've met in my whole life. Even Lupe would guess it."

  "Leave Sister Lupe alone. Guess what?"

  "There has been a fucking conspiracy going on for centuries, so there was a cover up. You are part of a team that must defend the church's money. That's the bottom line, idiot. Money!"

  "I know that. It was the reason I would have rather not been part of the team."

  "The archbishop gave Dad the choice to talk to you first, before they exile you somewhere out of the spotlight. I didn't tell Dad that you want me to pick you up. So what should I say to him now?"

  Esteban thought for a few seconds, and shrugged.

  "There are two cardinals, four bishops and a myriad of priests and nuns in our genealogical tree. Tell Dad, and the whole family, that I won't be their pope."

  "Esteban, all you have to do is to apologize."

  "I'm not doing it either."

  "What's wrong with you man? Wait a second did anybody mess with you too?"

  "No, Raul. Sometimes I feel survival guilt, nobody would dare to mess with a Hidalgo, you know that, but I met a couple of kids back in the seminary that were abused. The plaintiff reminded me of them, and later during a meeting with the defendant, this despicable person compared himself to me, so I lost it."

  "Damn it! He is really sick, eh?"

  "How could he dare to compare himself to me? Next thing I knew is I cleaned the table with him. I didn't hit him, but I pulled him over to my side along with the glasses of water, paper and everything else."

  "Fuck, Esteban. I wish I had been there."

  "No, you wouldn't. If the other counselors wouldn't have stopped me, I'd have beaten him. Do you see now, why I don't want our Eminence getting involved in this? I'm responsible for my own actions."

  During his friend's convalescence, Esteban had long conversations with Mauricio, and recognized what was really missing from his life, and the longing increased. He'd still controlled it; if there was something he had in spades, it was strong will, but when that bastard tried to compare himself to him, he lost his patience.

  "Raul, I know discipline, and how hard it is to resist temptation, so being compared to someone who knows nothing of these things, and didn't have any qualms in abusing a minor, made my blood boil."

  "Oh, man, now I understand your rage. So, are you finally leaving the church, marrying some nice girl and having kids?"

  "Never."

  "Never to which part?"

  "I'm not getting married to anybody or having children. You have enough progeny. Why do you keep insisting on that?"

  "Because, I'm afraid that you will leave the church and go all gay and everybody will believe I'm the same."

  "Oh, selfish as usual, aren't we? Don't worry, as long as Dad is alive, I will never come out. Besides, I'm a man of God. I probably will transition into the Episcopal Church."

  "Those clergy can get married."

  "What an obsession with marriage you have, Raul. For someone who recently got divorced that's pretty weird."

  "I'm tired of seeing you lonely with only women like Lupe around you."

  "Raul. Which part of gay didn't you get?"

  Esteban didn't wait for an answer that would never come. Raul seemed speechless for a few long seconds. Esteban knew that his brother didn't like it when he referred to his unwanted homosexuality, because wanted or not, it was part of him; a part that shamed Esteban as much as it shamed the members of his family who knew about it.

  "Esteban, are you ready?"

  "Yeah, I only need to make a quick phone call and we can leave."

  "Okay. Do you want me to take anything to the car while you change?"

  "Yes, please take those boxes, I'll be right out."

  Chapter 2

  Blind to the beauty of the early spring sky, and tired of pacing the same spot in the little garden, Javier dropped under a leafless tree. His mind was lost in the recent past as usual, unaware that the bottom of the tree had become his favorite spot in the last three weeks. The only place he could find any solitude during the day in the big crowded house in which he lived.

  The warm breeze caressed his face, pulling back his hair. He wished that he could throw Mauricio's memories to the wind and forget that he had been his entire world. From the start it sounded too good to be true, and Javier suspected that passionate love would eventually become an addiction that might kill him. Maybe not so fast, but yes, he might eventually die of having loved Mauricio.

  It had been love at first sight, in spite of Mauricio being older than him. Javier had fallen under the spell of the most experienced man he'd ever met. That charming smile and gentle disposition were irresistible when matched with a lean muscular body and a handsome face.

  He had to think that now, it was only himself—simply Javier. He had to start again, stop thinking about the past, and Mauricio.

  He'd given so much love, and at the end, even his hard earned money; but today, adding all together, his countless tears were all he could budget for. Although being fair, Javier had been happy beyond his wildest fantasies.

  Sometimes when Javier was silent, he listened to Mauricio's voice, perceived his scent lingering in the air,
or his hands embracing his waist. Of course, it was only his imagination, but sometimes it felt so real, it hurt.

  He wished nobody thought of him, because no amount of kind words would change anything. So much died together with Mauricio, that Javier felt there was nothing else to experience, but simply remember he had been a volcano erupting in passion within Mauricio's arms.

  While making love, Mauricio had taught him hundreds of caresses, but today sex was the last thing on Javier's mind. Having HIV, he feared rejection from any possible partner.

  Conscious of his only twenty-five years, in spite of the legacy of being HIV positive, he should be looking forward to the future. However, starting again seemed impossible, because without Mauricio's love he'd collapsed, and the only thing that kept him going on was to fulfill Mauricio's last wish.

  Javier had to personally return twenty years of letters to Mauricio's pen pal and best friend, Esteban Hidalgo. He knew little about Esteban. When he'd met Mauricio, he noticed that he received letters and books from this person.

  Javier had asked, "Why don't you guys e-mail one another? Letters are so yesterday."

  Mauricio had looked at him as if Javier had insulted his only religious ritual, and indignantly explained, "It's not the same. This, he held it in his hand, and this, I wrote with my own hand. It's a real way to keep in touch regardless of the distance."

  It had been then, when Javier noticed for the first time, the generational gap that Mauricio's bed skills had managed to erase before. His husband died at thirty-nine, so Esteban should be around the same age.

  These guys witnessed the development of the personal computer, but they still wrote letters like it was the Victorian age or something.

  Before passing away, Mauricio had two obsessions, Javier's forgiveness and returning Esteban's letters to him. Mauricio had said how sorry he was for transmitting the virus to him so many times that Javier felt bad, and the letters. Mauricio had put them in an expensive leather portfolio, all of them, carefully packed, and had handed the portfolio to Javier as if instead of letters, it were full of gold coins. Certainly, it weighed almost as much.