A Magnetic Couple Dilemma (Unfinished Liaisons Series)

by Rorrete, Naaju

One of the young women got close to Diego, and interlacing her hand with his, leaned against Diego's side, while looking inquisitively at Javier.

  "This is my girlfriend, Carly. Honey, this is Javier. Remember? I told you about him."

  She rubbed herself some more against Diego, while saying, "Hi."

  Javier had seen that look before, it could be translated as 'what a waste you're gay'.

  In the next hour, her hold on Diego increased, and Javier wondered if Raul got it all wrong. It was Carly keeping Diego, not the other way around.

  Diego seemed so delighted with his presence, he asked Javier to move in with him permanently. He would have his own room, small, but private. When Javier asked how much rent he would have to pay, Diego explained, "Nothing. You can contribute some cash for the utilities, and bring food for everyone if you want, but there is no rent to pay."

  "None? How come?"

  "Well, the house is paid in full. Well, there are the taxes, and other stuff, but there is a fund for that too."

  When Javier continued looking at him without understanding, Diego elaborated some more, "This house was Esteban's great grandmothers' home. She wanted to leave it to him, but because of his priesthood, anything he inherited would become the church's property. She willed it to me, but it's his home. Anyway, I've lived here most of my life too."

  These were interesting anecdotes. Diego told him many more, which expanded Javier's understanding of the relationship of the Alvarez brothers and the Hidalgo family. Diego's mom had rented the second floor of that same house when she was pregnant with Mauricio. She'd been abandoned by Diego's father because she got pregnant by someone else, who deserted her too.

  "Don't get me wrong, she is a great woman. When I was growing up, she kept two jobs to support us."

  Javier listened to Diego's account of their childhood, which had been easier, thanks to the support the Hidalgo family provided. Doña Vibi had always made sure they got enough to eat.

  "Food is essential to that family. That's the thing I remember the most, there was always so much food around."

  Diego had added with a wide smile, while he gave Javier a tour of the town. The Hidalgo family owned many properties in the four towns of the waterfront, mostly in Hoboken and Jersey City, including some businesses.

  Diego explained that the main business they had was importing goods from Spain: wine, olive oil, Spanish confectionery, etc. For decades, they had a chain of restaurants, but the recession had affected them, so only one Hidalgo Spanish Italian restaurant remained in Hoboken.

  "The others," Diego had paused before saying, "That evil creature turned them into strip clubs, or gentlemen clubs as they are called today."

  The evil creature was Raul, whose name Diego rarely pronounced, he was always referred to using some bad appellative. When Diego and Carly left to go shopping for the baby, Javier went upstairs and knocked on Esteban's door.

  As soon as Esteban opened it he said, "I'm on my way out."

  "Are you dismissing me?"

  "No, it's the truth, I'm going to my parent's house. I must explain my decision to a few members of my family. After that, I have a few choices of places I can work as a teacher, all around the country."

  "I didn't know you were also a teacher."

  "Well, I'm a Jesuit… I guess I've never stopped being one. Besides my law degree, I have a doctorate in theology, I can teach in any college or university." He shrugged. "It's a matter of checking which of my friends who left the priesthood before me are now working at universities, and could hire me or recommend me."

  "If you leave Hoboken, please take me with you."

  Esteban's gaze slid away from Javier as he explained.

  "Javier, you have to stay with Diego in the meantime, otherwise everybody is going to think I left the church for you, and that is not true."

  "I don't care if they think that."

  Esteban's gaze returned to meet Javier's eyes while he pressed his lips together.

  "But I do."

  Sighing Javier agreed.

  "Okay. I'll stay with Diego, he asked me to move in with him before, but I didn't want to bother him."

  "It's okay, he'll be pleased to have you around."

  Javier held his hand. "After your family gets used to the idea that you're no longer a priest, can we live together?"

  Esteban looked back at him in silence and Javier continued.

  "Esteban, I'm tired of being this sad because I'm alone. You're the only person I can relate to, not even Diego makes me feel as at ease as you do. I want to have someone to live for, to fight for, please Esteban."

  Suddenly, Javier remembered his status, and let go of Esteban's hand.

  "Oh, God. I forgot the whole HIV thing. I'm sorry, the idea of not seeing you got me crazy, I can't move in with you."

  This time Javier got Esteban's attention for sure.

  "Javier, being honest, I don't know if sex is in our future, even if we live together. I'm not sure how I will ever see sex as something normal after so many years of abstinence."

  Javier smiled and declared enthusiastically.

  "That makes you my perfect partner."

  "I don't know, Javier. This is unexpected for me, and I'm used to planning my life to the smallest detail."

  Javier sulked, and said, "It's because of the virus, right?"

  Esteban surprised him when he leaned forward and hugged him, pressing his cheek to Javier's face, but keeping their lower bodies separated.

  "Listen, Javier, if we ever do it, there is safe sex is for this type of case, right?"

  "Yes, there is, but there is always a risk, and I would never date anyone who is HIV negative. I'm sorry for being this bold, when I know this might be so awkward to you."

  Esteban shook his head. "Your HIV status is the least of my worries, I can live with that."

  "Are you sure?"

  "Yes. I need time to think about if I want to share my life with you, that's all. If I decide to give us a chance, I won't be a coward again, it won't be easy, but I'm willing to give it a try."

  This time Javier wasn't so sure anymore. "But the risk…"

  "I'll take the chance if I think we could have a future together."

  "And if you don't?"

  "I'll leave you alone to find someone who can make you happy."

  Feeling Esteban's warm body so close, Javier muttered. "Perhaps, I'm not worthy of you."

  Esteban broke the embrace, and looking him in the eyes, cupped Javier's face in his hand while stroking his skin with the thumb from the same hand.

  "You are so worthy for me that I want the best for you, and I don't think I'm the best you can get. You're still young, and you can do better."

  Then slowly he leaned forward and tentatively pressed his lips over Javier's mouth. The tender kiss lasted only seconds, and without another word, Esteban walked away and went down stairs.

  Esteban kissed him!

  Javier stayed in the same spot long after Esteban was gone. That was all he could think of, and he hadn't reacted in time. If he ever got that close to him again, Javier wasn't going to let it go so easy.

  Chapter 7

  During the following weeks, it seemed as if Esteban had given up on him. He'd stayed mostly at his parent's house, and when he came around, they were never alone. More than once, Javier caught Esteban watching him when he thought nobody noticed and it wasn't Javier's imagination, there was a longing in Esteban's gaze that contradicted his actions, as if he said with his eyes what his mouth held back.

  The press problem was solved after Esteban let them follow him around on a couple of occasions. Javier had watched on the local news how the reporter complained of Esteban's stoicism; nothing she had said seemed to impress the former priest. Diego had laughed at her astounded expression as the TV crew followed Esteban, who ignored them and walked as if they were ghosts he couldn't perceive.

  The last time she covered him, she practically closed the case saying that his quitting the
church probably had been a coincidence, and that she would be covering the trial, which was the real news.

  Javier reflected on the news against his own situation with Esteban as a real impossibility. The man had a will of steel and few things really touched him. He considered himself lucky because he'd witnessed a weakness nobody else had.

  The following week Javier started working with Diego at the Hidalgo's Foundation, where Esteban was in charge of the legal department. A job he had done part time, but now was his only one. Javier wondered if he would stay around or travel like he said he wanted to do.

  Little by little, Javier had started to know the Hidalgo family. Some were nicer than others, but all had welcomed him.

  One day Diego told him, "Javier, listen, I'm trying to help here, but you must let me help you."

  "I'm okay. I don't know why you are so concerned."

  "Because it has been more than a year since my brother died, and you're still mourning like it was yesterday."

  "Diego, I loved Mauricio."

  Javier wanted to be honest and confess he was sad for someone else's absence, but didn't feel like speaking about Esteban yet.

  Diego frowned, and Javier worried that he offended his brother-in-law. His next words kind of confirmed that.

  "He was my only brother, and I miss him too. You have no idea how many times I reached for my phone to call him during those first days. I knew he was dead, but a part of me refused to admit it, and continued thinking of things I wanted to share."

  "I'm sorry, Diego."

  "No, don't be. What I want is you to be active, really interested in doing things. Don't you think it is time for you to play again?"

  "Am I becoming a burden for you?"

  "No. Javier it's not about me, it's you; this was exactly what Mauricio feared would happen with you, that you would become depressed and waste your life away."

  "If you want I can move out, I'll find another place."

  "No, please stay. You are a big help with the foundation, and the kids love you. Besides, I need your company."

  "We need each other."

  That was true, because Carly had gone back to school, which was great for her future as Diego told Javier, but she usually came home only at dinner time. At first, Javier had been glad, because Carly seemed openly jealous of him. it took weeks for her to accept that Javier wasn't going to take Diego away.

  The future mother simply didn't like anybody getting close to Diego, she left the room every time Esteban came around, which Diego justified by saying it was because Esteban reminded her of Raul. Esteban attributed her unfriendly attitude to her pregnancy and didn't get offended.

  The baby issue had been solved for the time being. Raul had sent Carly a big basket of flowers and an "I'm sorry" note. She had melted while Diego almost had a heart attack. Javier had learned that Raul's favorite name for Diego had been for years, Esteban's whore. Which now he knew wasn't true, but he wondered how many thought otherwise.

  When Raul showed up, he had a proposal for the couple. Javier had been there and as soon as Raul said he wanted to speak to Carly and Diego, he headed for the door, but Raul stopped him.

  "Javier, please stay, because I need a witness."

  "A witness? Why?"

  Javier didn't understand what exactly he wanted from him, so Raul explained.

  "I had violent fights with Diego in the past, but I've never been violent with a woman. I don't want these two saying otherwise with only their word as evidence."

  Diego winced and gestured at Raul while saying, "And you came in peace? This is ridiculous."

  Raul replied with a calm attitude. "You were the one who told Esteban about getting a restraining order against me."

  Diego shook his head. "I don't think it's prudent to involve Javier in our business."

  Raul pointed at Javier. "He already knows the details of what happened."

  Javier looked at Diego, who inquired amazed. "You knew?"

  "Yes, I was there when Raul told Esteban. Do you want me to stay as a witness?"

  "I have no problem," Diego walked to Carly and changing his tone to a tender one, asked, "What about you, Carly?"

  She shrugged and pursed her lips. "Whatever."

  Javier wondered what these men could find in her, she wasn't a pretty girl, the only thing she had was her youth, which in his opinion wasn't a quality. Regardless of her pregnancy, she stayed thin as a model, and even if he didn't find women attractive, he knew when someone had a nice body. She didn't. Her breasts were tiny, and his own ass probably looked better.

  Javier shook his head. He usually didn't think like that about people, his thoughts were a reflection of her attitude. He sat on a couch and listened to their arguments without paying attention until Carly exclaimed, "Two daddies! That's perfect, because I have two and it has been great, I've always gotten more presents than other kids."

  Jesus! What had Raul offered? Javier paid attention this time as Diego was speaking.

  "Raul, are you sure?" Cool, he said his name. Javier was amazed by the second, but Raul wasn't.

  It was the first time Javier witnessed them exchanging anything other than insults. So he listened when Raul answered, "Yes, if you are. Think about it, you will be the legal father, no matter if I'm the biological, and I will give you a sum every month to help with the baby's support, voluntary, of course."

  Diego observed him suspiciously.

  "That sounds too good to be true."

  Raul seemed to be losing the patience he showed until then.

  "Ask Esteban if there is a way I can commit without going to court, since you will never take my word for real."

  Then Carly spoke for the first time, standing next to Raul and stroking his arm absentmindedly.

  "I believe you, Raul."

  Carly was clinging to him and Javier wondered if he should leave before they engaged in another threesome. Surprisingly, Raul seemed to be cold toward her, not rude, simply distant. Slowly, as if he didn't want to upset her, he removed her delicate hand from his arm and said staring at Diego, "I won't deceive you about this. If you assumed the baby's paternity, I will provide anything financial."

  Diego pulled Carly to his side and hugging her said, "Sure, I will be the baby's father, but I have a question."

  Raul narrowed his eyes before inviting him. "Go ahead."

  "Will you be part of the baby's life?"

  Apparently, the other expected another question, because he said, "I don't know yet."

  Diego insisted. "I need to know."

  While he talked Diego held Carly from behind and she leaned against him, they both were about the same height, so her head could easily rest on Diego's right shoulder. They looked good together, and when he caressed her belly and nudged her nape, Javier thought he knew what they found in one another. Comfort.

  Raul pressed his full lips together and stared at them, before explaining.

  "Well, I have four boys, if he is a boy, you might want him to meet and play with his brothers, if the baby is a girl, I still want them to meet her, just in case, so they know who their sister is."

  As soon as Raul gave his response, he started walking toward the door as if he couldn't wait to escape. Diego followed him.

  "What about you, Raul?"

  He whirled from the very door and said, "Listen, Diego, you wanted a child, right? Yes, I know, you did. Now you got it thanks to me and I'll never take it away from you. So, stop pushing me, we cross that bridge when we get there."

  "If you don't burn it first."

  Raul scowled and left without looking back.

  Javier didn't know what to think about the whole drama, but Carly was extra happy for some reason only she knew, while Diego seemed worried. Javier patted him on the shoulder before going to his room. "Everything will be all right, and if Raul doesn't behave, Esteban will make sure he does."

  It had been then when Diego suggested Javier perform his music for the Hidalgo family, in particular, Doña E
lvira, who as a benefactor for a few symphony orchestras in the Tri-state area, could recommend him as an orchestral musician, even if Javier only wanted the position part time. The woman was also Esteban's father's mother, and the bane of Doña Vibi's existence. The mother-in-law from hell, as Esteban's mother declared constantly.

  "You're talented, I can't let that talent go to waste," had been Diego's motto until Javier accepted to do a mini concerto for the family. For Javier, knowing Esteban was going to attend was his only real motivation. Diego and he put together two musical pieces from the Baroque period. Diego played the oboe while Javier performed his violin.

  Diego had said that Doña Elvira was like a queen, indeed, her family was part of the Spanish aristocracy. She came to America as one of those Spanish brides the Hidalgos imported. The house was pretty, and she sat on a high chair with all the dignity of a lady. All the members of the family Javier knew were there, and some new faces he hadn't seen before. Apparently, every Sunday after church the huge family met at the matriarchal home.

  Doña Vibi sat next to Sergio and smiled at Javier, her presence was a welcoming one.

  Together with Doña Camila, Esteban's aunt, Doña Vibi had been the friendliest person he met so far. And the only woman in that room dressed in bright colors, all the others wore black, gray or white. Diego explained that since the family was so big, they were always mourning for someone, so the older women never wore colored dresses.

  He noticed Esteban taking a seat next to his aunt and smiled briefly at him. He seemed nervous and Javier didn't blame him, there was something in Doña Elvira that would intimidate anybody. Javier thanked his ruthless upbringing, because she didn't scare him at all. His father trained him to interact with the rich and powerful without hesitation.

  Diego had mentioned that if he got on her good side, he didn't need to worry about the rest of the family, she would protect him. She had done it with him. And the woman confirmed it herself when she told Camila before the concert started, "With Diego I always knew what to expect, he never wore any disguise. So, I never had any false expectation with him, and he never deceived me."

  Javier knew that she was targeting Esteban, who remained calm as if she wasn't referring to him. And that was only for leaving the Church, what if she ever learned about Esteban's homosexuality; Javier rather didn't imagine that. He knew of people who accepted gays as long as they didn't belong to their own family. As weird as it sounded, he had the hunch this was the case in the Hidalgo family. They had their own version of "Don't Ask Don't Tell".