Crazy for Lovin’ You

by Teresa Southwick

  He let himself in the house and dropped his briefcase in the office at the front just off the entry. Then he went in search of Taylor.

  He found her in the kitchen. Cooking.

  He couldn’t help grinning when her flowery fragrance drifted to him and he realized by that and her clothes she’d just bathed. He drank in the sight of her legs, bare below her white shorts. Her form-fitting pink T-shirt stopped just at her waist, but when she reached up into the cupboard, he was treated to the sight of some smooth midriff skin. From the side, he could see that her pretty face was squeaky clean and without makeup, and a hot-pink scrunchy held her sun-streaked brown hair on top of her head.

  If she brought up the weather, somehow he was going to turn the conversation to something personal if he had to take her in his arms and kiss her senseless.

  He cleared his throat so she wouldn’t be startled. “I see someone else is just getting home from work.”

  She turned and smiled at him—a genuinely warm and welcoming expression in her beautiful brown eyes before the shutters went down. “Howdy, stranger.”

  “If that’s your way of saying I’ve been busy, you’re not just whistling Dixie. So have you.”

  “You’re right. But how did you know?”

  Because he knew her routine, her fragrance and the fact that when she was working, she wore jeans. He didn’t see her bare legs until her work day was finished.

  “Just a guess,” he said.

  She opened the refrigerator door and pulled out a longneck bottle of beer, his favorite brand. Apparently she was noticing things about him, too. Then she grabbed an opener, yanked off the cap and handed it to him.

  “I have a feeling you can use that.”

  “You’re a good woman, Taylor.”

  She gifted him with a wide, bright smile, and something between pleasure and pain swelled in his chest. He realized these last weeks here at the Circle S were probably the happiest he’d ever known. On the circuit, he’d competed day in and day out, half the time not even knowing what town he was in.

  After the injury, he’d channeled his energy into college classes, his degree, then getting his business off the ground. But somehow, after seeing Taylor again and spending time with her, he was beginning to feel ties. To Destiny? To her?

  Roots?

  “I’m just whipping up some rice, chicken stir-fry and vegetables. Do you want some? I made enough for two in case you came home for dinner.” She glanced at him over her shoulder.

  Did she realize what she’d just said? That he was home? He’d never really felt that anywhere. His life had been a series of foster parents, then a rented room when the department of social services had cut him loose. But this place—and Taylor—were getting under his skin. He just wasn’t sure whether or not he was happy about it. Every time he’d sat on a bull, he’d been prepared for a rough ride. He didn’t think there was any way to get ready for the twists, turns, ups, downs and pain of a relationship. He didn’t have what it took.

  Mitch took a drink of beer. “Dinner’s the best offer I’ve had all day.”

  “Sounds like you haven’t had a very good day. Want to talk about it?”

  He shook his head because he wanted to very much. The idea was too appealing. But he didn’t like what that meant. The idea of sharing himself with her made him want to hop the bus to parts unknown before he got in so deep he couldn’t get out.

  “So what have you been up to?” he asked, turning the conversation away from himself.

  “I’ve been training my hired help. All of ’em are good kids and I think they’ll work out great. Cal White especially. I wish I could keep him here forever. He works hard. He’s fun and funny. And he takes part of his pay to ride the bulls we board here for Dev. Sound familiar?”

  He grinned. “Nope.”

  She leaned her elbows on the counter across from him and smiled back. “Liar, liar, pants on fire.”

  “If the shoe fits.” He shrugged. “What else have you been up to?”

  “I picked up my brochures and advertising material and I’ve been mailing them out to big travel agencies across the country.”

  “Any response from the newspaper article?” he asked, then took a long swallow from his beer.

  “Major response. I mailed a thank-you note to Annie and Walt,” she said. “I’ve got both long summer holiday weekends completely booked. Various weeks in between are reserved, too. I’m even getting reservations for fall and winter.”

  Her eyes sizzled with excitement like sparklers on the Fourth of July. The only time she’d looked more beautiful to him was when he’d surprised her in the tub, wearing nothing but bubbles, pink cheeks and a smile.

  “Good.” Wimp word. A weak reaction for a woman who was well on her way. But if he said more than that one word, he couldn’t hide the deep rasp of need he knew would creep into his voice.

  He wanted to grab her around the waist and dance her through the house in celebration. But his reaction to thoughts of her and roots and home and telling her about his day raised his guard faster than a prairie fire with a tail wind.

  “Thanks, Mitch.”

  “For what?”

  “Your recommendation. Getting Annie out here. I don’t for one minute believe it was about the championships. Publicity for a rodeo event spreads by osmosis just through the kids who compete, their folks and friends. Not to mention the local Texas sports pages. You kept your word to give me some good PR and there’s no doubt in my mind that it helped.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  “In spite of the past, everything that happened, you did what you said.”

  “You thought I wouldn’t?”

  “Not for a minute.”

  “You’re a fibber,” he said, tossing her words back at her.

  “Not me. You’re a good man and I appreciate it.”

  But he noticed that she kept the kitchen counter between them. He couldn’t blame her for that, or any doubts she might have about him, either. He wasn’t in her league and never would be, no matter how much money he made.

  Still, an almost overwhelming urge came over him to reach out and touch her, pull her around the barrier between them and into his arms. He wanted to storm her defenses and get her to lower the gate. To let him in, for her and himself, too. But he’d tried the relationship thing twice and been stomped into the dirt both times. Did he dare go for number three? Could he risk it again? Did he even want to chance having his feelings handed back to him?

  Taylor had just thanked him for not holding a grudge about what had happened ten years ago. There was no point; he didn’t care anymore. Not about Jen.

  But Jen had been his first and most difficult lesson. Her message to him: he wasn’t good enough for a woman he cared about to love him back. He wanted to believe he was a fair man, but damn it all, Taylor was Jen’s sister. He’d said it himself—the fruit didn’t fall far from the tree. Why should he believe she was different?

  Her father hadn’t liked him. Mitch was an abandoned kid from the wrong side of the tracks and the man had found ways to remind him—hold it against him. Like father, like daughters? After leaving Destiny, he’d become a big-money winner on the pro rodeo circuit and the buckle bunnies had lined up like competitors waiting for their shot. The lesson: women had hated or loved him and basically judged him not for who he was, but his status.

  All except Taylor. Only she’d been a girl then. But she was a woman now and every painful lesson he’d ever learned came roaring back.

  Taylor set her elbows on the counter, then rested her chin in her palm. “You look tired, Mitch. Tell me what you’ve been up to today,” she said. “I know you don’t want to discuss it, but give me the high points. The light version.”

  He found he wanted to tell her just like ten years ago when he’d also claimed he didn’t want to talk to her.

  He let out a long breath. “I spent several hours in front of the Destiny City Council trying to convince them to change the zoning
so my company could build a shopping center. I tried to convince them that their wives and daughters would be forever grateful to have stores in their own backyard. Come to think of it, maybe that wasn’t the best strategy.”

  “I think it would be great. Now we have to go a long way or use catalogs to shop. If they agree, does that mean you’ll be around for a while?”

  “Yeah.”

  She turned away to pull plates out of the cupboard. He couldn’t see her face to read her expression. Would she want him around? How would she feel if he stayed? He found the idea of basing his company in Destiny didn’t make him want to catch the first bus out of town. In fact, the longer he was here, the better he liked the notion.

  Ten years ago when he’d left, he’d put all his energy into bull riding, then his education and business. He’d worked hard at forgetting his life here. And that included Taylor.

  Since coming back, he’d remembered the bad times, but there were good memories, too. Like the way he’d looked forward to describing for Taylor a particularly great ride on one of her father’s bulls. He’d enjoyed telling her what happened to him at school. And when children’s services had given him the bad news on his eighteenth birthday that he was on his own and no longer eligible for state assistance, Taylor had been the one he’d sought out to talk to. She hadn’t let him down, either. She’d helped him find a room to rent and kept after her father to give him more work hours so he could pay for it. He’d thought their friendship was habit, or just the fact that she was always hanging around. But now he wasn’t so sure. He still felt that connection with her, the sensation that he could tell her about anything. Except…

  He recalled that night. Fourteen-year-old Taylor had tried to tag along with him and his friends to the lake. He’d brushed her off and she’d been all horns and rattles and fit to be tied. As things turned out, it was probably the best decision he’d ever made. She was so young. She could have been the one…

  But she wasn’t. And the next night Jen had dumped him. He’d lashed out at Taylor—the only one who had never given him anything but friendship—and she’d said she loved him. Do you always hurt the ones you love?

  There was no doubt she was a woman worth caring about, but love? He wasn’t sure he knew what the word meant. Sure he had feelings for her. But putting a label on them just wasn’t something he wanted to risk.

  “How do you feel about that?” She spooned chicken and vegetables over the rice she’d just put on the plates.

  “Hmm? What?”

  “About staying in Destiny?” she clarified. “Would it bother you? After all, you’re a former rodeo celebrity. Now you’re a highfalutin businessman. Can you be happy hanging your hat in a one-horse town like this?”

  She tried to joke, but the look in her eyes told him the answer mattered to her. One memory he wished he could erase was the look of hurt he’d seen on her face that night he’d pushed her away. He couldn’t change the past, but he could do his best not to make the same mistakes. He wouldn’t hurt her again. When his gaze strayed to her mouth, and filled him with an almost uncontrollable yearning to kiss her, he turned away. A guy like him without roots and family ties couldn’t help but hurt her.

  If he’d been thinking straight, he’d have moved out right after he’d turned down Melissa Mae Arbrook’s blatant invitation. Right then he’d known something was wrong. Instead he’d come back to the ranch to a naked, bubble-covered Taylor and kissed her. Although not when she was naked, which he had a feeling he would regret till his dying day. Because the weeks since then had only worked to make him want her until it was a constant ache inside him. Contrast and compare—what it felt like to have her, what it felt like to not. Having her was definitely better, but not especially smart.

  He had tried to keep his feelings for Taylor under the heading brotherly, but hadn’t managed to do that since he’d laid eyes on her again. But it was never too late. Meaning he’d better not kiss her like a lover. Better yet, not at all. If he laid a hand on her, he didn’t think he could keep from kissing her senseless. Or touching her until she moaned with passion, those seductive little noises in her throat made him burn for her until he thought he would go up in flames.

  “Mitch? You’re really zoning out tonight. You must really be tired.”

  “I guess so.”

  “How do you feel about the possibility of staying in Destiny?” She met his gaze and her own was hopeful.

  Now’s your chance, Rafferty. A golden opportunity to be noble and not hurt her. Be impersonal. He took a deep breath. “I’ll do whatever I have to do to make my company a success,” he said carefully.

  Her eyes flickered with what might be disappointment, then the look was gone. “No one understands better than me the need to make a success of a business.” She carried the plates into the dining room.

  “Do you hear anything from Jen?” he asked.

  He’d merely wanted to change the subject, but the look she shot him was anything but casual. In fact, it was a lot like her wounded puppy look, the one he wished he could forget.

  “I talk to her almost every day,” she said.

  Taylor hoped she hadn’t sounded defensive. If so, she couldn’t help it. At the mention of her sister’s name, she’d almost dropped the plates she was holding. She hadn’t been prepared for the question. Mitch hadn’t talked about Jen since he’d first arrived. She’d thought…

  What? That Mitch cared for her? That he wanted her? That the two times he’d kissed her had erased all those years of him wanting her sister? Apparently there was no statute of limitations on stupidity. Where Mitch Rafferty was concerned she was destined to make a fool of herself for the rest of her life.

  “How is she?” he asked.

  “Who?”

  “Jen.” He sat down at a right angle to her and shot her a quizzical look. “Now who’s zoning? You must be tired,” he said, using the same words she had.

  “I am.” Zoning and tired, but not for the reason he thought.

  Since the night he’d seen her in the tub, he’d worn his indifference like a comfortable pair of chaps. No matter how much she might want to, she couldn’t blame him for putting her at arm’s length. She’d always seen through his prickly exterior to his soft-hearted center. Apparently he was still a nice guy. The kind of man who had been hurt and wasn’t about to turn around and do the same to a woman who had experienced heartbreak times two.

  He’d kept his distance. A fact for which she was grateful. Really.

  Okay. Maybe a time or two she’d wished Mitch would kiss her again. In an instant of spinelessness, she’d wanted just one more moment in his arms. But he hadn’t approached her. Their interaction had been friendly, but cool. And that was the devil of it. After her busted engagement, she’d made peace with the fact that she was meant to be alone.

  Until Mitch walked back into her life.

  Seeing him again had made her wonder “what if.” Sharing a house together had given her a chance to see what a relationship with him could be like. She’d discovered it was pretty darn nice.

  Then out of the blue he’d asked about Jen. And in a single instant, hopes she hadn’t even realized she’d harbored popped, poofed and evaporated. Because she suddenly got it.

  He hadn’t gotten over her sister.

  Not in ten years.

  What would he say if he knew Jen was coming back for rodeo week? Was she coming because she knew Mitch was here?

  Maybe it was for the best that they see each other again. Since he’d returned, she’d had a sense of forces from the past working on the present to make amends. Was she losing her mind? Next thing she knew, she’d start humming the theme from the Twilight Zone. But maybe it was time for Mitch and Jen to get together, the way it should have been ten years ago.

  Taylor was fine about it. Only someone truly gifted in the art of idiocy would let her heart be broken by the same man twice. So it was no skin off her nose. Definitely for the best. And when pigs flew, she might almost
believe that.

  But there was no point in not telling him. “Jen will be here tomorrow.”

  Chapter Nine

  “It will be good to see her again,” Mitch said evenly.

  Taylor watched him carefully for signs that he still cared for her sister. Since she’d recently experienced symptoms of seeing the guy you’d had a thing for ten years ago, she knew what to look for. Shortness of breath, keen interest manifested by a glow inside so powerful that it must be visible on the outside, too, trembling hands, nervous energy, sweaty palms.

  He showed none of the above.

  But the man had made his fortune riding bulls. He had nerves of steel. Of course he would be able to hide his reaction.

  Maybe she could provoke one. “Jen’s been busy. A heavy caseload at work. I haven’t seen much of her. It will be good to have her here,” she said.

  “So you do get lonely,” he teased.

  “As you’ve pointed out on several occasions, I do talk to myself, so I guess that’s a logical assumption.” She picked up her fork and met his gaze. “But it’s not loneliness in the usual sense. I’m perfectly content on the ranch. But I’m social, too. I can’t deny that it’s nice to have someone besides myself to talk to.”

  He frowned. “How come you never married, Taylor?”

  She was still watching him, searching for a signal that he couldn’t wait to see Jen again. For the second time he’d caught her off guard with a question. Not to mention that he boomeranged attention from Jen back to herself. Perverse man. What did that mean? Confusion caused her to consider the question for several moments before answering.

  “I already told you why,” she finally said. “I was engaged and it didn’t work out.” She shrugged. “End of story.”

  He shook his head. “There are any number of available guys for a social belle like yourself.”

  “Like who?”

  “Grady O’Connor for instance.”

  “He’s got his hands full with twin girls.” She laughed. “He’s said more than once the last thing he needs is another female in his life. In fact, the girls picked out a new pup recently at the animal shelter in Destiny and Grady insisted it be a boy.”