by Agatha Frost
“The boot acted like a fridge,” she murmured as she stared down at the sprinkle covered coconut icing. “I think it’s still edible.”
Julia thought they might take the cake into the house to cut it up to share amongst the people who wanted a slice, but Barker had other ideas. Using his fist as a shovel, he dug into the cake and scooped up a handful, exposing the bright rainbow layers inside. He wasted no time taking a huge bite.
“Coconut!” he exclaimed through the mouthful, sprinkles and icing on his chin and cheeks. “My -”
“Mum’s favourite.”
“You remembered,” he said after swallowing the first piece. “It’s really delicious. Try it.”
Barker offered his fistful of cake to Julia, who was not too proud to take a bite, especially considering the night she had endured.
“It’s good,” she said after swallowing. “Pretty perfect, if I do say so myself.”
“You’ve got a little –”
Barker reached out and wiped the tip of Julia’s nose, removing a small blob of icing. He licked his thumb with a smile, letting Julia know the Barker she loved was still in there, if not a little buried by Detective Inspector Brown’s tough cop routine.
“You’ve got some too,” Julia said, dipping her finger in the cake and wiping it across his cheek. “I think you’ll need a napkin for that.”
“You too,” Barker said, pressing the fistful into the side of her cheek.
Julia stumbled back, her mouth wide open, one eye closed, and half of her face smothered in icing.
“Do you want a war, Barker Brown?” Julia asked, glancing at the massive cake in the boot. “I don’t mind wasting my creation on you.”
Barker took another bite of the cake, a playful smirk tickling his lips. For a moment, Julia forgot that it was freezing cold, or that they were in the middle of a murder investigation; all that mattered was her, Barker, and the cake.
Julia smeared off the mess on her cheek and readied herself for a full food fight, but a rustling in the bushes behind them froze her. She looked at Barker who seemed to have heard it too. He lifted his finger up to his lips, dropped the fistful of cake, and pulled her behind him. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, swiped up with his thumb, and turned on the flashlight. Like a deer caught in the headlights of a speeding car, a scrawny boy with a cap and a black tracksuit stumbled out of the bushes, the reflective panels down the sides of his clothes shining back at them.
“Billy?” Julia asked, squinting through her clear eye. “What are you doing here?”
“The whole village is talking about what’s happening up here,” he said, his face ghostly white as he shielded his eyes from the bright light. “C’mon, man! It’s me.”
Barker lowered the light before wiping his hands on the rag Julia kept in her boot for dusting her dashboard. Julia did the same to her hands and face before tucking her hair behind her ears, not caring that one side was now matted with icing.
“There’s a road block,” he said, looking down the dark winding lane. “I had to come through the fields. There’s a whole group gathered down there waiting for something to happen. I heard there were hostages. I couldn’t find Jessie, and I wanted to make sure she was okay. She’s not answering her phone.”
“There are no hostages,” Barker said with a roll of his eyes. “What have they put online?”
“There’s videos,” Billy said, reaching for his phone. “Some girl called Bella has been live streaming on and off all night.”
Billy turned the phone around to show them a video of Bella and Conrad curled up on the bed, one of them holding the camera out of reach. There was a loud thud, forcing them both off the bed and towards the door. The live stream cut off, but Julia did not need to see the rest. She noticed that Bella’s follower count had risen from eleven thousand to seventeen thousand.
“That definitely rules them both out of pushing Hilary,” Julia said, crossing her arms and facing Barker. “That’s something.”
“I saw an ambulance speeding away from here before,” Billy said as he put his phone away, his eyes full of worry. “Please, just tell me about Jessie. Is she okay?”
“She’s fine,” Julia assured him. “She’s in the house.”
“Can I see her?”
“Nobody is allowed in,” Barker said firmly. “It’s a crime scene.”
“Barker,” Julia whispered softly, looping her hand around his. “Jessie and Dot are there, and we’ve both been walking around all night. What’s one more person?”
Barker pursed his lips down at Julia before nodding somewhat reluctantly at Billy. With Julia and Barker hand in hand, they walked back to the manor with Billy trailing behind, kicking gravel with his trainers as he went.
“B-Billy?” Jessie stuttered as she walked out of the downstairs bathroom with Bella, both of them looking like they had been crying. “W-What are you doing here?”
“That’s Billy?” Bella asked, rubbing at her red nose with her sleeve. “He’s cute.”
Barker pushed Billy forward. He stumbled, glancing angrily over his shoulder at them. Julia gave him an encouraging nod. He inhaled deeply, none of his usual teenage bravado anywhere to be seen.
“Hi, Jessie.”
“Hi.”
“Can we talk?”
“Fine.”
Billy followed Jessie back into the downstairs bathroom. The lock clicked in place, sending silence shuddering across the entrance hall.
“Let’s leave them to it,” Julia said, nodding to the kitchen. “Are you coming, Bella?”
“Oh,” she said, caught off-guard by the invitation. “Sure. If you don’t mind, Uncle Barker?”
“Of course I don’t mind, kiddo.”
Julia headed straight for the kettle, but Bella had different ideas. She fished a bottle of white wine from the large clear glass fridge, and three glasses from the cupboard next to it. She filled each glass to the top, making Julia abandon her ideas of peppermint and liquorice tea. She was not much of a drinker, but she did enjoy a glass of white wine every now and then, and this was one of the times she thought she would enjoy it very much.
“Cheers,” Bella said, lifting her glass up. “To fresh beginnings. Nothing will ever be the same again.”
“I suppose you’re right,” Barker said, clinking his glass against hers. “I’m sorry about what I said. I didn’t mean to call you stupid.”
“You were right.” Bella took a deep gulp of the wine. “That’s why it upset me. Jessie managed to give me some perspective. She’s a good kid.”
Bella lifted her hand up to her cheek, which had a soft pink mark on it, as though she had recently been slapped very hard.
“I hope she was gentle,” Julia said after a soothing sip of the wine, which tasted impossibly more expensive than the bottles she usually picked up from the post office shop. “She’s not used to a lot of people her age.”
“It was nothing I didn’t need,” Bella admitted. “I’m ending things with Conrad. She made me realise all of the followers in the world aren’t worth the lies.”
Barker wrapped his arm around her to give her a reassuring squeeze. She smiled weakly up at her uncle, looking like a little girl. Julia had put her in her early-twenties, but she suddenly looked like a teenager now that she had cried off most of her makeup. She looked old enough to drink, but not old enough to make wise life decisions without a sobering slap across the cheek.
“Maybe I’ll join the police,” Bella said as she stared into her wine glass. “Follow in my uncle’s footsteps.”
“Really?” Barker asked, his face lighting up. “It’s not for everyone.”
“The online life isn’t for me,” Bella said resolutely. “I was only doing it because everyone else was. I want to really live, ya’know? Experience things. Helping other people might be just what I need.”
Just like Julia had with Jessie earlier, she knew she was witnessing the growth of a girl into a woman. She had not liked the ‘Bel
la Belles’ version of Barker’s niece very much, but she quite liked the more mature woman sipping wine across the kitchen island.
Julia was about to suggest that Barker give Bella some advice about joining the police force when Dawn ran into the room, a note clutched in her hand.
“Have you seen Ethan?” she cried, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I can’t find him, and he’s – he’s left me this.”
Dawn handed the note over to Barker, his eyes widening when he saw what was written on it. Bella clasped her hand against her mouth when she read it over her uncle’s shoulder. Barker tossed it across the counter to Julia.
She read over it, her heart swelling up into her throat.
“’I’m sorry, Dawn,’” she read aloud. “’I can’t live with the guilt. Have a good life. E.’”
13
“He’s not down here,” Dot said, casting a finger to the sitting room and dining room.
“And he’s not in the bedrooms,” Heather added as she propped up Conrad. “Have you checked outside? Maybe he’s made a run for it.”
“Typical of him to run at the first sign of danger,” Theo cried, leaning against the bannister with Dawn sobbing next to him on the bottom step. “Never could stomach confrontation.”
“I’ve got the officers searching the grounds,” DS Christie called from the front door. “They didn’t see him leave.”
“He could have crawled out of a window,” Dot suggested airily. “Well, the man must be somewhere!”
“Search everywhere again,” Barker ordered. “Be as thorough as possible. Check every cupboard and small space.”
The group reluctantly disbanded, leaving Julia and Dawn alone in the entrance hall. Julia sat next to her at the foot of the stairs, the cold marble stinging her backside.
“He’s dead,” she whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks. “He’s dead, and it’s all my fault.”
“Where were you when he vanished?” Julia asked, resting her hand on Dawn’s shoulder. “And where did you find the note?”
“He left the note on the dressing table in our bedroom, but I was with –”
Her voice broke off, and she began to sob even more. Julia did not need to ask to know exactly whom she was talking about.
“Theo,” Julia said with a firm nod. “You were with Theo.”
Dawn suddenly stopped crying and looked up at Julia, her upset subsiding so confusion could take over.
“H-How did you –”
“I saw you kissing him,” Julia explained. “I assumed he was Ethan, until I actually saw Ethan. It’s the nose.”
Dawn began to sob even more, her face clamped in her hands. Julia rubbed her back softly, not wanting the woman to think she was being judged.
“It’s complicated,” she said when she paused for breath. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me,” Julia said, nodding to the study, which she knew was empty. “Why don’t we talk about it in private?”
Dawn nodded as she stumbled up to her feet with Julia’s help. Julia almost had to hold the woman up as they walked carefully across the marble floor to the door on the other side. When they were in the study, Julia assumed her father’s seat, and Dawn slumped in the chair across from her. With the door closed and the comforting smell of cigar smoke and old books surrounding them, Julia felt happy to be away from the marble perfection of the entrance.
“When did the affair start?”
“It’s not an affair,” Dawn said, running the back of her hand along her stuffy nose. “Not really. I met Theo before Ethan. It was the summer of 1994. I was taking my niece to see The Lion King, and I bumped into Theo and Barker in the lobby. I spilt my popcorn all over him, but he was sweet about it. Theo was nineteen and Barker was fifteen, but they were watching it alone. Everyone was talking about it, so you had to go and see it.”
“I remember,” Julia said. “I think I was fourteen and my sister was eight.”
“After the film ended, Theo slipped me his number,” she continued. “I called that night. Peggy answered.”
“Peggy?” Julia asked.
“Peggy Brown,” Dawn said. “Their mother. She was a formidable woman. She scared me over the phone, but I fell in love with her when I got to know her. She was a baker, just like you, so there was always a cake to try. I loved going there after college. I was taking my A-Levels at the time. Even back then I wanted to be an architect. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be, but I enjoy it all the same. I can’t believe I’ve been in this beautiful house and not sketched a single thing, but I wasn’t expecting any of this.
“We were together up until Christmas. He ended things on December 20th with a phone call. I was heartbroken. He told me he’d met this girl called Michelle. She was blonde and beautiful, and I didn’t stand a chance. I had braces and spots back then. I’d met Ethan by that point. I remember him being really into his Sega Mega Drive. I visited the house to give Theo his Christmas present, even though he’d just finished things. I’d bought him a gold chain necklace, and it had cost me months of my weekend job wage.
“Theo wasn’t home that night. Nobody was, except for Ethan. He was playing Sonic the Hedgehog 3. Peggy had given it to him as an early Christmas present because he hadn’t stopped begging for it all year. I wasn’t going to stay, but he offered me some pop, and then I just started talking about everything, and I realised how much they really did look alike. Ethan’s nose was straight back then. One thing led to another, and before I knew it, I’d switched from Theo to Ethan. I even gave him the gold necklace. I was pregnant with Luke by February 1995. We were still kids ourselves, but it made us grow up quickly.
“I thought I wasn’t bothered about any of it. I had my man, and my son, and we got on with things. Theo and Michelle married, and Bethany came the next year. Bella followed two years later. I always wanted a daughter, but it never happened. We tried up until our thirties, but it just wasn’t meant to be.
“I’d see Theo at the dinners at Peggy’s, and things would be fine. He was civil to me. I convinced Ethan I had never loved Theo and I was just trying to get to him. I don’t think he really believed it, but he said he did.
“You have to trust me when I say I never cheated on Ethan. Not once. Not until I came here and I saw Theo for the first time since he’d split up with Michelle.”
Dawn paused for breath, her bottom lip wobbling. Julia plucked a tissue from the box on the table and passed it over.
“Thank you,” she said before blowing her nose. “I can’t believe I’m telling you all of this. I’ve never told anyone. When Theo arrived here the afternoon after I did, he looked at me like he did in that cinema twenty-three years ago. It was like no time had passed, and he was seeing me for the first time. After everything that had happened with Ethan, I couldn’t help myself. I needed to feel safe, and Theo always did that. I think it’s taken me all of this time to realise I’ve been in love with Theo, and I’ve just been projecting that onto Ethan because they share a face. It was never some seedy affair. Our lips hadn’t touched in twenty-three years until we came here.”
“I believe you,” Julia said, absorbing everything carefully.
“When the housekeeper was pushed down the stairs, I was with -”
Barker suddenly burst through the door, a look of terror on his pale face. Both women jumped up in an instant and ran out to the entrance hall.
“Where is he?” Dawn cried, her hands disappearing up into her hair. “Barker, please tell –”
Julia and Dawn’s eyes both wandered to the ajar basement door at the same time, both knowing what was down there.
Dawn ran towards the basement, followed by Julia and Barker. They both ran down the stone steps into the freezing room under the manor. Under the single bulb stood Heather, Casper, Bella, Conrad, Theo, Dot, Jessie, and Billy. They were all crowded around something in the middle of the room.
“We’ve called an ambulance,” Dot explained, stepping back to show Ethan on the floor, a bot
tle of pills clutched in his hand. “I – I think it’s too late.”
Julia pushed through the crowd as Dawn screeched against Barker’s chest. Julia pulled the blue bottle from his hand, pills scattered around his bald head.
“Beta blockers,” Julia cried, tossing the bottle to the ground. “They’re Hilary’s blood pressure pills! She was looking for them. I think he’s had a heart attack.”
Julia pressed her finger to his neck, a faint pulse beating against her fingertips.
“Give him some room,” Julia cried as she straightened out Ethan’s limp body. “He needs CPR.”
“Dad?” Bella cried, looking at Theo. “You work for the St. John’s Ambulance. You should know this.”
Theo stared down at his brother, his eyes wide as though he did not know where he was.
“Theo!” Dawn cried. “Do something!”
Julia stared up expectantly at Ethan’s twin brother, but his eyes stared right through her. He doubled back and pushed through the crowd, knocking Casper clean off his feet before running up the stairs.
“Step back!” Dot announced, pushing Julia out of the way. “I saw a documentary about this.”
Dot locked her hands together and began to pump down on the man’s chest with more force than looked possible from the slender old woman. When nobody else jumped forward claiming to have superior knowledge to Dot, Julia stepped back and clutched Barker’s hand, her ears pricked and listening out for the ambulance sirens.
14
“You might have just saved his life,” the paramedic called to Dot as they rushed Ethan out of the manor on a stretcher after defibrillating his heart in the basement. “It’s a good job somebody had CPR training, or he’d be a goner.”
“It was nothing,” Dot said with a proud smile as she brushed down the pleats in her knee-length navy blue skirt. “First-aid is a passion of mine.”