by J. L. Drake
“Damn.” He muttered something I couldn’t understand. “I have to go.”
My heart dropped. “Yeah, okay.”
“Lexi, I need you to hear me.” It was another goodbye, just what I needed. “I love you, so no more goodbyes, just a see ya.”
I rolled my head upward to try to stop the tears.
“I love you too. See ya later.”
The line went quiet. He was gone. He was in the middle of nowhere surrounded by people who probably wanted to see him dead.
I took some time to deal with my feelings. Turned out I needed more time that I thought.
***
El: Hey!
El: You coming to dinner Thursday?
Thursday…
El: Hello?
Later that night…
El: I can’t believe you missed dinner! I had to cover for you. Made me feel great. Thanks.
Three days later…
El: Okay, Lexi, what’s up? Where are you?
El: Open your door! I will come back with my key!
Five days later…
El: You have never been this distant with me. It hurts.
That one still stung. It was true we’d never gone longer than a day without a text or a call. So now that it had been six weeks, I was considered the world’s worst sister.
El: I don’t want to push you away, so I’ll give you your space. But we’re twins, I feel what you feel. You’re hurting, therefore I’m hurting. Honestly, Lex, it’s lonely.
I kicked my blankets to the floor, wanting to hit something. I hated that I was avoiding him. I didn’t do this.
Group Text
Lexi: Meet me at The Burrell at 7 p.m.?
Almost instantly…
El: I’ll be there at 7:01.
I smirked. Such a jerk.
Mom: Yes! I’ll be there.
Dad: Okay.
Mom: Yay!
With a deep breath, I let off some stress, then hurried to the bathroom to get ready. I needed to be out the door in thirty minutes.
El was already there when I arrived, and he waved at me from a booth. Once I hugged him, I couldn’t let go.
“I needed this.” He hugged me harder.
I kissed his cheek. “Me too.”
“Oh my,” Mom squealed behind me. “I’ve missed you, Alexi!” She nearly broke my back before my father smothered me with a hug. After a few moments, he pulled back and studied my face.
“Remember, if you ever need a teddy bear…?”
I laughed and let their warmth defrost me.
“I’ll always have you, Daddy.”
When he smiled, his whole face brightened, and seeing that smile made me feel like I accomplished something important.
“You always have me.”
We sat around the table, and instead of asking me how I was doing, we just hung out. Picked up right where we left off seven weeks ago. Why would anyone pull away from love like this? This was a great wake-up call. It was time to move forward, and if I loved him, then roll with it, and I did. So…
***
Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.
My hand patted around my night stand. Who the hell was texting at 3:00 a.m.? For once, my head didn’t pound. The dinner with my family last night was just what I needed.
El: 911
El: Wake up!
El: Please, Lexi! Pick up.
El: ANSWER YOUR PHONE.
What?
I quickly answered the persistent ring.
“This better be important.”
“Lexi? Fuck, finally!”
“El?” I sat straight up at his tone. “What’s going on?”
There was silence, then I heard it—the page of a doctor.
“Why are you at the hospital?”
A sob ripped through the line and nearly brought my heart to a complete stop.
“Mom, Dad.” His eerie cry froze my blood. “They stopped for gas on the way home from dinner, and someone…shot them.”
A deep ache spread along my skin and jabbed me right in the center of the heart. Everything around me melted away. I was on my bed in the dark, with no words.
“Alexi, I need you to come to the hospital and help me.”
“Where?” The words barely came out.
“Boston Memorial.”
I dropped the phone and raced to get ready. My hands were numb as I clawed at the tops of my leggings.
“What’s going on?” Jaci squinted at the light.
I grabbed my keys and left.
***
Keith
“Johnson! Pick up your shit!” I barked at one of my bunkmates. I was tired of tripping over his stuff.
He gave a curt nod before he started folding his clothes. When I arrived here, right off the bat, I had trouble. For some reason, Snider had a problem with me. It didn’t take long to see I needed to look out for myself. So the next time he came at me to show off, I chopped his windpipe and elbowed his rib cage. Not enough to break it, just enough to bruise it. Turned out I was a quick study in hand to hand combat.
Now the men had respect for me, and that was all I ever asked for, anyway.
I rushed to the truck to start my shift.
“Keith,” Green’s voice cracked over the radio. “To your left.”
I raised my binoculars and peered along the mountain peak. Henderson groaned as he lost his lunch into a small dugout he made. Thankfully, we had stopped for a break before he got sick. We’d been on the road for two hours, and my mouth was dry and my lips were cracked. Even my teeth felt gritty.
I knew holding still was worse. It was safer to be a moving target. We really needed to move.
With my stomach on the ground and my elbows propped up under the truck, I was covered well enough not to be seen. Using my shoulder to hit the button, I muttered, “So far, all is clear.”
“Henderson, to your three o’clock,” Green ordered from about twenty feet to my left. He and Henderson were hidden in some dry brush.
Henderson laughed into the radio in his dizzy state. “Ahh.”
“Sorry, didn’t copy that. Is there or isn’t there an enemy pointing a gun at us?” Green joked.
Mic and Joe, two other men from our unit, raced to meet them and made it to cover as I watched their path. They moved to higher ground to see what was ahead.
“All clear,” Mic jumped in on the radio. “Keith, we’re coming to your—”
BOOM!
The bang was so loud, it blew my reality. My hands, arms, legs, feet, everything felt independent from my body. Noise felt like liquid as the shockwaves rippled over me. My eyes squeezed shut to keep out the sand. Jamming my tongue through my teeth for some padding, I waited out the horrible pain.
I wasn’t sure how long it was before I started to come to. My lungs burned, and something smelled terrible.
“Yalla!”
The yelling made my body jolt and stiffen when I heard the language. It was Arabic, and they were saying ‘hurry.’ That was when a pair of boots stepped down out of a Hummer and raced off toward the road. Was I still armed? My left arm moved around my leg and felt my knife. Well, that was something in case they returned.
I wasn’t sure what happened, but I sure as hell wasn’t about to make any sudden movements. So for the next ten minutes, I focused on making sure everything worked on my body. Other than my shoulder, I was good enough.
Scraping my forearms along the dirt, I inched out from under the truck and stood on shaking legs. My equilibrium was off, and my head beat like a drum. What the hell just happened? Confusion could be a tricky thing. Like, did you move? Or stay put? Were you still in danger? Or should you move and help your buddies who weren’t moving? So much rode on what had happened.
“Keith!” I spun at Green’s voice and saw him staggering in my direction. Holy shit, he only had half an arm. His body was covered in blood, and his exposed muscle was twitching. “Where is everyone?”
My palms slammed into his chest as he fell into me. His face was white as a sh
eet, and beads of sweat clung to his forehead.
Everything rushed to me at once. I sat Green on the ground, and with heavy legs, forced myself to find the others. I heard chopper blades in the distance and looked up, but the moment I did, I tripped over something.
“Shit!” I yelped and quickly shuffled backward away from Henderson’s torso. His head was a few yards away.
“Mic!” Joe took his friend’s hand and rolled him onto his side. “Mic, wake up.”
In my stunned state, I dropped to my knees and evaluated the two of them. Mic was gone, and Joe was missing one of his feet.
Something flashed off to my left, and I freed Mic’s gun and held it up to my face.
My heartbeat evened, the cries of my men disappeared, and the pain in my head vanished. I slipped into survival mode. Moving to balance on my knee, I scanned the area and waited.
I felt the prickle start at the bottom of my spine, and it spread like milk coating the curves of my muscles. My brain was super alert and everything locked in place.
Zip! Zip!
Two bullets whipped by my ear, and I jumped over Mic to shield Joe.
“4:30!” Green shouted the direction from his slumped position.
I jerked around and saw the bastard, and without a thought, I pulled the trigger and sprayed bullets, sending him backward.
Two more men showed themselves, and I annihilated them.
“Keith!” Joe shrieked as a guy charged at me.
I turned and shot him twice in the face.
“Ahhh! Anyone else?” I shouted more as a release than anything else. I moved back to Joe, who was still trying to get Mic to wake.
“Lean back,” I ordered. When he didn’t listen, I pulled their hands apart. “Joe, he’s gone. If you don’t let me pack your wound, you will be too.”
He finally nodded and looked away, squeezing his eyes shut. I made quick work, keeping my mind focused on what I had on me and what resources we had to get out of there.
“Wow,” Joe’s face lit up, “it’s so close.”
I didn’t want to know what he was seeing. If he muttered about a white light, I was going to have to slap him.
Dirt flew into my face, blinding me, and a moment later hands lifted me up and helped me to my feet. The only reason I didn’t put up a fight was the American flag on his shoulder. The others were hoisted in, and we were in the air.
I watched as the truck got smaller and smaller. Joe stared at the sky, and Green was out cold. Henderson and Mic were off to the side with a blanket over them.
“How?” I mouthed to one of the men. How did they get here so quick?
“Delta Three saw the attack, called it in.”
I sank in the corner and tried to understand why I was spared. I imagined if I could hold time. I pictured a bedsheet laid perfectly flat. Life going by smoothly with just a few wrinkles here and there. Then someone comes along and pulls the middle up, causing life to rush by quickly all around you. Speeding up events, attacks, loss, everything without warning. Then, just as fast as the rush came, it smooths back out and things continue on at normal speed. Only problem with that was your head was still trying to process what the hell just happened.
How was it one moment you were fighting for your life, and the next it was all over? How was that flaw not fixed when whoever it was created us? My brain was hurting.
The vibration from the chopper made Mic’s face appear from behind the heavy blanket. I started at him for a bit, then closed my eyes and let my mind try to sort through everything the best it could.
After a couple of days in the hospital and some psychological tests, I was released with orders to stay at the base for the next few days. I really wasn’t sure why, because as confused as my mind was it was now perfectly clear. The fog of confusion had lifted, and I felt good. I was okay.
I grabbed a case of beer and headed toward the tanks and crawled up on one of them. It was a good spot to see the stars and gave an entire panoramic view of the fenced-in base.
Green and Joe were going to be fine, but they had a long road ahead of them. Henderson and Mic were on their way home in wooden boxes.
Home.
With the side of the cap resting on the edge of the truck, I knocked it off smoothly and took my first sip of beer since I’d been here. Oh, it was good.
“I thought only I came here.” A man I’d seen around a few times stood at the front of the wheel well. He wasn’t one of us; he was a general. I sat a little straighter to show respect.
“You look like you may need it more than me.” He smiled.
There was something genuine about him. I knocked off the top of another beer and held it up as an offering.
“Thank you.” He nodded before he jumped onto the tire and hiked himself up effortlessly. He took the cold beer and tapped it to mine. “General Logan.”
“Private Keith.”
“I know who you are, Private.” He squinted as he looked up at the clear sky. “I’ve had my eye on you since you arrived. What happened the other day was rough, but the way you performed was impressive.”
“With all due respect, General, I killed four men and let two of my own die, and the others will never serve again. Not so sure how that could be considered impressive.”
He peeled at the corner of the label. He didn’t remove it, just strummed his thumb as if he played a guitar.
“You were the only one who was left and able to fight, and you did. They may not be able to serve, but they get to go home to their families, and that was because of you.” He looked at me, and his face changed. “I am sorry about Henderson and Mic.”
I appreciated that he knew their names and nodded, taking another drink in memory of them. They were good men and good friends.
“It’s hard to lose to someone. Sometimes it plays on you a lot harder when you’re over here. You don’t have the time to grieve, and if you do, it’s not the way we’re used to. If you’re struggling with it, that’s normal. Why not join some of us on the ridge Friday night? We have our own way of saying goodbye.”
The general set his empty bottle down before he rubbed his hands together, and I felt the mood change. “Have you ever thought about special ops?”
“That’s the plan someday.”
“Why don’t we meet up tomorrow at my base and discuss a few things? You’re off this week. It won’t matter if you’re at this base or mine.”
At least that was something to occupy my head.
“Sure.”
“Chopper will be here at oh-eight-hundred.”
CHAPTER SIX
I jumped down and ran away from the blades to give the pilot the polite thumbs up that he was clear to leave. It took me only a moment to feel the vibe of the base was off.
“Hey.” I stepped in the way of a soldier. “What happened?”
“IED killed three more,” he muttered before he rushed off.
Shit.
“Keith!” My sergeant waved me over. I jogged to where he was staring at three computer screens where newscasters were reporting today’s events.
“Jesus.”
“I need you out tomorrow. We’re short staffed until the next round comes in.” He eyed me over his shoulder. “You’ve proven to the men you’re smart in the field. We need more of that.”
With a quick nod, I waited to see if there was anything else.
“Keith,” someone said from behind me. “This came for you.”
Leaning forward, I took the scrap paper from him.
Call me ASAP—Lexi
Call home—Dad
My stomach twisted as I asked for permission to use the satellite phone. I stepped inside an adjoining room and dialed her number.
“Hello?” Her voice was quiet.
“Lexi, what’s wrong?”
A strange noise brushed up against the phone before I heard her cries. “They’re dead, Keith, they are both dead.”
I snapped my eyes up to the ceiling. “Who? Who is dead, Lex?”
“My parents. They were shot.”
A massive ball lodged in my throat as I fought to keep things down. “Oh my God, babe. I…I don’t know what to say. When?”
“Two days ago.”
“What in God’s name happened?”
More quiet sobs found my pounding ears. I pressed my hand against my chest to try to calm my wildly beating heart. I was desperately working hard to process it all.
“Keith.” There was a pause. “I need you to come home.”
Fuck.
“Elliot has shut down and keeps disappearing. We have some family here we don’t even know. Touching everything—it’s just a mess.” She hiccupped as more sobs came. “I feel as if I’m spinning faster and faster, and when it stops, I’m not sure what will be left. I really need you here, Keith.”
Shit, shit, shit! I moved further away from listening ears.
“Lexi, there is nowhere else in the world I’d rather be than right there with you.” I took a deep breath, knowing this was going to crush her further. “But, there’s been…issues, and we’re short some men. We’re all pulling double shifts until the new guys arrive. I can’t come home right now. I really want to, and I’ll work on it, but I just can’t.”
“Lexi?” A familiar voice could be heard in the background, and my mind scrambled to place it. “Can we talk?”
She let out a deep sigh. “Please, Keith, try. I really need you.”
I wanted to ask who was there with her, but I decided not to play the jealous boyfriend card. Lexi had never given me a reason to distrust her.
“You have my word. I love you, Lexi. See ya later.”
“I love you too.”
The line went dead, and I was left in shock and confusion.
I took a moment to say something nice about her parents in my form of a prayer. They were wonderful people who had loved their children unconditionally.