by E. K. Blair
“This is all because I broke a promise to you. I’ve never broken a promise to you and this is why; look at us. I’m supposed to be with you, I said I would be.” He looks so sad and broken. “Laney baby, I’m so sorry I walked away. I just had to make sense of what you said and how it made me feel. All I heard was that you don’t trust me, but I realize you were saying that you do trust me, enough to tell me your fears. Maybe you were a little harsh.” He smiles slightly, but not a real smile. He props up on one elbow, looking down at me lovingly, desperately. “I get what you’re saying, Laney, I do. There’ll be girls and parties, but there’ll be boys and parties where you are, too. All I can tell you, with all my heart, is that there is only one you. I’d never risk this; us.”
God, he’s amazing. I know he believes everything he just said, and I know he’d die before he consciously hurt me, but girls can be persuasive and so damn manipulative. Alcohol and college are the matches to their gasoline.
“Not everyone leaves for good, Laney. Not your dad and not me. Life doesn’t overwhelm us all. It throws snags, but we’ll deal, together, like we always have.”
He’s right, he’s not a runner. Maybe I’m overreacting and imagining the worst.
“You know what, Ev, can we just forget I said anything? We’ve still got weeks left before it’s even an issue, and maybe all the girls there will be really ugly.”
He laughs and places a kiss on my forehead. “We’ll curb it for now, cause I’ve got time left to show you I belong to only you. Prepare to be wooed and subdued,” he says with my smile, half love and respect of a best friend, the other half love and sultriness of my man and forever; the smile only for me.
“Woman, you went a lil’ crazy, so you know I’m picking the movie, right?”
“As long as it’s in this room, pick away.” Like he’d leave this room right now, surely he’s not dying to tell my dad how he missed using the front door. Oh yeah, Evan, you da man. Pick the movie, Mister All Powerful, cause you win.
I don’t even ask—he chooses Robin Hood. He thinks it’s the “manliest” of my collection. I try to hold my eyes open, memorizing how often he breathes, the sound when he blinks, the exact speed he rubs my arm...but soon I am asleep.
Chapter Eleven
EXPLORATION
Laney
Summer is bliss as Evan and I spend every second we can together. We fish a lot, lay out by the lake, and look up at the stars. Our slumber parties are a nightly occurrence. Tonight when he shows up, I have big plans of my own. His text pulls me out of mentally writing “Make Your Move for Dummies.”
Evan: Hey Sugar Bear. Leaving gym, home 2 shower, then b there. Maybe 1 hr.
Laney: Hurry...safely.
Evan: Why, what’s up?
Laney: Lil chilly in this outfit. Need snuggled.
Look at me, all suggestive vixen. I can’t very well send him to the University of Orgy without some clue of what he’s missing.
My phone starts ringing, “Ho Hey” by The Lumineers. It’s our matching ringtone that Evan picked out. It only plays when we call each other.
“Hello?”
“Woman, you can’t be telling me stuff like that over text when I’ve gotta drive to you. You trying to kill me?” He’s actually groaning out his words.
Hearing him so worked up sends goosebumps across my skin. “Oh, I’m sorry, my bad. I didn’t think of that.” Lie. I’m kinda good at this game.
“What are you doing right now? Where’s my Laney?” His soft chuckle sends warmth throughout me.
“She’s right here, under her covers, all chilly and lonely.” That was my best innocently sexy voice, which I didn’t even know I possessed.
“I’m hanging up now, baby. I’m gonna run off the road. See you in just a bit.”
Oh Lord, now I actually have to face the music. I’m sooo scandalous! Bout time!
I jump out of bed and quickly brush my teeth, spray on some body mist and brush out my hair. I take one last look at my new ensemble; boy cut pink sleep shorts and a matching cami. I almost put it back at the store, losing my nerve, but I’ve got a point to make.
“Hey, sleepyhead.”
I rub my eyes, waiting for them to readjust to the dim light. I must have dozed off waiting for him, but his sweet, throaty words in my ear, his arms around me, and his body pressed against mine from behind is a welcome wake-up call.
I roll over to look at him, shaggy brown hair still wet from his shower and latent heat in his blue eyes. “Hey, sorry, I fell asleep.”
“Don’t be sorry, I love sleepy Laney. I missed you.” He rubs his nose along mine; I love it when he does that. How will I live without this? No, stop that.
“I missed you, too.”
“Mmmm, good. Gimme some sugar.”
I smirk and lean in, placing a silky kiss on his lips. He groans, running his long fingers through my hair and sucking my bottom lip eagerly.
“By the way, loving the new pajamas, baby girl.” His hands explore timidly, feathering across arms and back, slipping lower with each sweep.
“Ah Laney, damn,” he grumbles as I pull away and place wet, open-mouthed kisses along his neck.
That voice of his, so sensual, does things to me and I know he feels my nipples harden against his chest. I run my hands under his t-shirt and over his rock hard abs, slowly making my way up his chest. God, he has a nice body, touching it burns me from the inside out. My hand tugs on the hem of his shirt.
“Off, now,” I breathe out.
He moves to pull it off from behind his neck, such a provocative move. I’ll have to work on my girl equivalent. He’s looking at me through heavy lids and smoky, carnal eyes; ones I’ve never seen, but like. I know he’s dying to touch me, but would never do so on his own. I have to give him the okay.
“Evan?”
“Hmmm?” “Touch me.”
He sucks in a deep, ragged breath, his nostrils flaring just before the corner of his mouth turns up in a sexy, one-sided grin. It’s the most arousing expression I’ve ever seen and it does crazy things to my lady parts. My thighs clench together. I’m surprised and eager to learn more about our bodies tonight.
“Laney, you’d tell me if someone gave you some weird pill right?”
Oh my God, he thinks I’ve been roofied? My brows scrunch at his crazy question.
“Kidding! I just...you’re just acting different.” His expression is confusing. Is he lusting or actually worried I may need my stomach pumped?
“You don’t like it?” Oh God, I’m not seductive, I’m silly... I’m not good at this. My cheeks burn and I pull back in embarrassment.
“Oh, I like it.” He tugs me back against his chest, my body melting to his whisper along my neck.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. You’re the sexiest girl in the world, Laney.” “Then hush and show me.”
His fingers delicately trace my neck, rubbing down to my shoulder, while the other hand grips my hip. His pinky sneaks between my cami and skin, sending a delicious zing of goosebumps in its wake.
“Oh yeah, love the outfit.” His kiss grows deeper, devouring my whole mouth. His tongue caresses everywhere before sucking mine, nipping my lip. It’s a kiss unlike any we’ve shared. He moves a strap down and begins to kiss along my shoulder, to my neck, and back again. His other hand has moved under the cami completely and rests right below my breast. The willpower on this boy!
“It’s okay, Evan,” my voice cracks through my heated panting.
“What’s that, baby?” His breath scorches my skin. “More,” I sigh.
He runs his nose along my shoulder and moves his hand up slowly to cup my bare breast. I feel him tremble, so I run one foot up his leg and wrap around his hip, embracing him. We have now officially entered new territory; this is the farthest we’ve ever gone. Thank God I didn’t sprinkle breadcrumbs, cause I never want to find my way back.
Chapter Twelve
SAVOR
EVAN
Sweet moth
er of...I’ve clearly died and gone to heaven. I’ve never experienced anything as wonderful in my life as Laney, bare skin, flushed and wanting. Her lil pink outfit, hard nipples, and sexy whispers are more than any man can take. Her perfect breast in my hand is the hottest thing I’ve ever touched, and that leg wrapped around me...Lord help me. My sweet lil Laney is a hot seductress and she’s all mine, untouched by anyone but me, ever.
I have to have more or I’m gonna explode, so I move to take her shirt off slowly, giving her time to stop me if she wants. My girl leans up to help and looks at me with those innocent, big brown eyes, a slight blush on her cheeks. She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen and I love her. I love her so much I can barely breathe. It’s like staring at the sun and trying not to turn away.
Leaning down, I brush my lips across one nipple, light pink and perfect, hardened to a tight peak all for me. My touch; I do this to her. She moves her hands into my hair roughly and pulls my face tighter to her, arching her back, pushing herself further into my mouth. She moans long and soft as I suck on her harder, kneading her other breast with my hand, a perfect fit. Her other leg goes around my hip and she grips tight, bless those softball muscles, and then she starts to grind. My Laney...starts to grind.
Oh God...think of something else...do not lose it and end this now. The heat of her seers through the thin layers of our pajamas as I slowly start to move my hand down along her toned, flat stomach. I feel the quivering, so I pull from her nipple and ask, “You okay, baby? Too much?”
She lays before me, pink cheeked. Her long blonde hair is spread around her; she looks like a dream. Topless, breathing hard with her eyes closed; the sight unnerves me.
“Look at me, Laney.”
She slowly opens her eyes and connects with mine.
There she is...
“Tell me what you want.”
“Touch me, Evan. Please, now.” No sweeter words have ever been spoken.
Give. Me. Strength.
I slide my hand beneath her shorts, kissing her neck, sucking her ear, breathing in her scent. I’m dizzy and physically anguished I’m so hard, but this is about Laney, emerging, just for me.
That first touch, her first touch, all mine. My hand gently slides down beneath her panties, feathering light touches against her untouched treasure.
“Oh God, Evan,” she moans and digs her fingers into my hair, kissing me with a desperate need I’ve never seen from her.
“You’re so perfect,” I whisper on her lips. “Mmmmm, we’re always perfect together,” she purrs.
Damn, my little beginner is good with the pillow talk. I continue with the gentle caresses, slow and savoring, but she tells me with her grip and moans; my lil tiger wants more. I give it to her, and watch in awe as she soon comes apart on my hand. Her breathing calms slowly and she finally opens her eyes, giving me the sweetest smile.
“That was amazing,” she hums out lazily.
I’ve never seen anything more so, and will replay it in my mind for the rest of my life. “Laney, was that your first orgasm?” I know without a doubt it’s the first at someone else’s hand, but I’ve often wondered if my girl pleasures herself. I suspect not.
“Yes, and I must say...I’m a fan.” I knew it.
I laugh softly, she’s so cute. “They get better, baby.
I can’t wait to show you it all.”
“How do you know it all?” she asks me with a slight narrowing of her eyes.
I don’t know it all, technically, and I don’t want to go into exacts, so I answer evasively, yet honestly. “I don’t, but I can’t wait to learn with you. I want to give you everything. Every experience I want you to have with me, always.”
Truly, I will kill any other man who ever touches her. Laney Jo is mine, forever.
“Me too, babe, you and me,” she says, leaning to kiss me softly. “Can I touch you now?”
“Sweetheart, you can do anything you want. And for future reference, you never have to ask.”
She laughs out loud and slowly moves her hand below my waistband. The trail under her fingers leaves my skin on fire, and when she runs one fingertip all the way down my cock, I grind my teeth. She pulls down my pants and just stares...and stares.
“Umm, sugar, you okay? Feeling a little exposed.” She blushes and bites her bottom lip. “Sorry, I just, um, it’s just...”
I can’t help but laugh a little; I know she’s never seen one before. “Don’t be afraid to tell me what you’re thinking, sweet girl.”
She takes a deep breath. “It’s...beautiful. I mean, I guess, I mean, I think it is...and big, like how does...um...?”
Oh yeah. Damn, my girl is adorable. She’s my innocently curious vixen and I get to share every first with her. I get to be her only. I get to show her exactly what happens and how things feel when a man loves a woman with everything he is.
“Come here, cutie.” I pull her in for a kiss, rubbing my hands up and down her arms to relax her. “Laney, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me, baby.”
“Oh, no you don’t, mister! I wanna play, and you’re gonna teach me,” she says with her stubborn lil sass. But then she turns sultry and takes my hand with hers down to my aching erection. “Show me what to do, Evan. Show me what you like.”
Yes, Ma’am.
Chapter Thirteen
DISTANCE
Laney
The rest of the summer flew by in a blissful yet shadowed haze, Evan and I exploring our relationship even as the looming end to it drew near, eventually leaving me alone to settle into “Operation: Laney’s a Big Girl.”
I miss him.
It’s only been two weeks, but the texts and calls every day don’t begin to fill the void. I need to see him, hold him, smell him... I’m miserable without him.
Our last day together haunts me. In the end, I won the argument, an empty victory; we would not be starting college as a “couple.”
“It’s nothing but space, Laney,” he says, dropping a kiss on my forehead. “It means nothing. I’m still yours. I’ll always be yours.” Holding me tight, kissing me tenderly, he’s trying not to tear up.
God, he feels so right against me. Can I just crawl inside and go with him? How do I possibly meet each day without Evan?
“It’s not goodbye, my love, it’s just see ya later. Remember that, okay?” His hands hold my face, forcing me to look into his beautiful blue eyes; the eyes that twinkle with my smiles and cloud with my frowns. Eyes that have watched over me for so many years.
When I close my eyes at night, our farewell plays on a reel in my mind that I can’t escape. We kissed goodbye a hundred times. We held each other with desperation, tears streaming down my face, and finally we headed down our own paths. Just like that, as quickly as our love came out in the open, it crawled back in the shadows; the shortest fairytale ever written.
Also haunting me...the last letter from my “admirer.” It was waiting in my lobby mailbox my first day, postmarked Savannah, GA, mailed three days prior. A congratulations card with a personal message: “Good luck at college, Laney Jo! Be a great as I know you are!” I’m trying to remain positive. It was mailed, which means he’s not here.
My classes seem good and softball weight training starts next week. The girls on the team I’ve met so far seem nice, and I’m chalking up my lack of enthusiasm to a new team and new girls. Most days I rely solely on my massive iTunes account and earbuds to offer solace.
My roommate’s name is Bennett, and so far she seems like a very cool girl. She reminds me a lot of Kaitlyn, which helps; so far we get along great. Bennett is a drama major and I’m already quite sure it was the perfect choice for her. Everything is “worth talking about” to her, and almost anything, including the wind, a chair, you name it...can elicit “a feeling.” She’s quickly turning into my saving grace; her flamboyance and whimsical charm often distract me from feeling completely alone.
“What are your plans this weekend, girl?” She’s sprawled across her bed, w
hich I have nicknamed Crayon Box because it is the size of one and encompasses every color I know, and some I don’t.
“Nothing great. Evan’s got speed camp, so I won’t be seeing him, yet again. Why, what’s up?” I’ve told her a bit about Evan, as much as I’m willing to tell someone I’ve known for two weeks.
“Welllll,” the drama major drags out for effect, “I think we should do the Hall Crawl Friday night.”
“What’s the Hall Crawl?” I’m not expecting to even halfway like the answer.
“It’s like a meet and greet through the whole dorm. The boys’ rooms are open, and they serve snacks, drinks, play music, whatever. All the girls start to their left of their own room, and when they announce over the intercom, you go to the next room till you’ve made it through the whole dorm!”
“K...couple questions, in order of importance of course. Do we actually have to crawl?”
“No, silly goosehead, that’s just a cute name.”
Ok, I feel minimally better. “Well, that’s a bonus.
Do they hand out rape whistles?”
“Laney, all doors have to stay open, and roommates go in pairs. It’s a tradition, and they wouldn’t still have it if anything had ever happened. You worry too much.”
“Are you still gonna do it if I don’t?”
“I don’t know if I can do it alone. I think it’s a rule to go in pairs. But if I can, absolutely. “
I knew that was coming, and there’s no way I’m letting her to go by herself, nor do I want to be the reason she can’t do it... “Okay, Friday night? What time?”
“Starts at seven.”
“You owe me big, Bennett.” Yup, she’s a lot like Kaitlyn.
“Hey,” he answers huskily. Hearing his voice settles me. I close my eyes to center on this sense. I need what I can have of him to infiltrate me, to bathe me in comfort.
“Hey, you, whatcha doing?” Getting it out takes effort, my throat is constricted.
“Just leaving practice, gonna swing by and get something to eat. You?”