Owned (Grave Diggers MC Book 1)

by Michelle Woods

  Buck wanted to storm out to his bike and go roaring over to her place to teach her all the reasons she was his but he knew he couldn’t. That would be a mistake; she deserved a life that didn’t include his club fucking it up. Dragging her back into this life was the wrong thing to do. For once he wasn’t going to be selfish and take what he wanted. But fuck, it was hard. Letting her go was killing him. Finally managing to calm his raging insides, he took a step back.

  “Good,” he stated in a clipped tone when he could speak. Patty watched him, shaking her head sadly as she looked up at his face silently. Her next words proved she was seeing way more than he’d wanted her to.

  “You’re acting like a fool, Buck. You left your patch with her so I know your game. I can promise you that leaving it with her isn’t going to stop every man from going after her heart. The club might understand what her still having your patch means but the rest of the world…” She paused, shaking her head sadly before she continued to speak. “The rest of the world doesn’t follow our rules and you know it. Which means one day she is going to find someone who won’t care. Some man is going to be sleeping in her bed, holding her, and he will make her happy. Tessa is going to love him, Buck, because no one stays frozen forever. That girl’s strong and she won’t allow you to destroy her life or take away her happiness. She will move on and you’re a damned buffoon for letting it happen when you’re still in love with her. Get your shit together and go beg her to forgive you because if you don’t, you will regret it for the rest of your life.” Patty shoved him out of the way while he stood there processing the sheer rage her words unleashed inside him.

  He knew she wasn’t wrong about Tessa finding another man eventually but the idea set loose such fury at this nameless, faceless man that he almost couldn’t contain it. It took him fifteen minutes of internal lecturing but he finally managed to release the death grip he had on the shelves next to him and unclench every muscle in his body. Buck refused to allow himself to drag Tessa back down the rabbit hole that was his life. No, she was too good for him and if that meant she would move on, he’d cross that bridge when they came to it. Buck needed to ride to get his head screwed on straight and think about something other than Tessa for a minute or two.

  That decided, he headed out to his bike, not even bothering to talk to Cindy before he left. She’d get a ride home with one of the others and he wasn’t in the mood for her to tease him about Tessa tonight anyway. She’d been doing it every night since he’d started this game.

  Climbing onto his bike, he headed out without a real destination in mind but he wasn’t surprised to find himself coasting to a stop outside a small blue house with lights glowing from the windows. Buck watched Tessa walk across the living room with an ice cream carton and a spoon in her hand before she curled up in her favorite chair.

  Damn, he really shouldn’t come here every night but he wasn’t able to stay away. He needed to see her through those windows separating them. It was fucked up but he always ended up here even when it burned his insides to ashes and made his whole being ache to touch her just one more time. He told himself he wouldn’t come and every single night he would find himself here watching. His heart burned and his cock tried to convince him that just once wouldn’t hurt but he knew it would and he wasn’t going to do that to either of them.

  Running a hand over his face, he wished just for a minute that he was a normal man—a good man—who could be with her and deserve her, but he wasn’t and nothing would ever change that fact. He sat and watched her for another hour until she went to bed with a sad little look on her face and he wondered again if he was making her cry herself to sleep. The need to know broke his soul every time because he didn’t want that for her—he wanted her smiling and looking like joy was pouring out of her like sunshine. Buck didn’t know what to do with her sadness. It was destroying him one piece at a time and it didn’t help knowing he was the cause of her pain.

  When he was sure she’d be asleep, he started his bike up and headed back to the clubhouse. He needed to cure himself of this addiction to Tessa because he didn’t know how much longer he could resist his need to be with her. When he was standing over his bed an hour later having found two bottles of bourbon to bury his sorrows in, he knew staying away from her was going to shatter him.

  The banging made him growl as he jerked awake realizing someone was pounding on the door to his room. Who was that fucking stupid? He’d downed two bottles of bourbon again last night and his head was pounding so hard he’d likely never get it to stop. He had found drinking himself into a fucking stupor for the last two days had helped him stay away from Tessa’s place. Not that it was going to work forever. He’d almost climbed on his bike last night to go over there and if he’d been able to walk straight he might have done it too.

  Slowly sitting up on the side of the bed and grabbing his aching head, he roared when the person started banging on the door again. He stumbled up dragging his ass to the door, not bothering to put any clothes on. He was wearing a pair of boxers and his scowl when he jerked open the door to send a murderous glare at the prospect who was standing there.

  “Um, sorry to wake you but we need to know what to do with all this stuff,” he said, stepping back looking pale and shaky.

  “What fucking stuff?” Buck demanded, not knowing what the fuck the man was talking about because he didn’t think he had forgotten to handle any jobs that needed to be done.

  “Ah, the stuff those two dudes brought over in the moving trucks and said belonged to you,” he said taking another step back, his look wary. Buck wondered grimly if they’d drawn straws to see who would come up here and ask him this stupid shit because he had no fucking idea what ‘stuff’ the man was talking about.

  “Look, just put it wherever you want, I don’t give a fuck,” Buck grunted. He was about to slam the door in the asshole’s face and collapse on the bed but he spoke again.

  “There is a lot of it and he says that it’s yours. We really need to know what to do with it.” Buck’s brain stalled. Fuck, he was going to have to go see what this was they were talking about and figure out what to do with it. He didn’t bother to put any clothes on, he just stalked out of the room and down the stairs to walk outside to the two moving trucks that sat in front of the clubhouse. He walked around looking inside and growled when he did.

  “Take it back,” he roared, anger burning inside him at the shit that was sitting in these fucking trucks. What the fuck was the woman thinking? He wasn’t going to take this shit.

  “Take it back where?” the prospect asked, looking confused.

  “Take this shit back to her place where it came from,” he roared, his head choosing that moment to throb painfully.

  “I—I don’t—um,” he was stuttering out when Dice pulled up in the drive. Dice climbed off the bike and walked over, looking at him with raised brows.

  “It’s almost four o’clock. Why are you in the yard in your underwear?” he asked, a little worried frown on his face.

  “Don’t fuck with me. Have them take all this shit back to her. Now, Dice. This is her shit and she is keeping it,” Buck growled, anger burning through him as he peered at the couches he’d made love to her on and the fridge she’d loved even as she’d told him she didn’t want it and the chair she liked to curl up in to read. Fuck, everything inside these trucks came with flashes of Tessa. His heart twisted painfully and he almost couldn’t handle the need spearing through him.

  Dice finally looked inside the trucks and his brows rose to his hairline. “Wow, she sent all the stuff from the house it looks like. Why did she do that you think?” Buck didn’t answer because they both knew why. He’d bought everything in these trucks for her because he knew she’d either needed or wanted it and he’d wanted to take care of her.

  “Just have them take this shit back, Dice.”

  “Nope, I’m thinking you want that stuff to go back to her place then you’re going to have to show them where it is because
I’m not going to do it for you,” Dice muttered. He walked away with a grin on his face that said he was making Buck go over there because he knew seeing her ripped him to shreds and Dice wanted him to hurt.

  Yeah, his brothers did not approve of his plan. Choke had actually punched him in the face for it the first time he’d had to lie to Tessa about him not being here when she’d come by. Choke wasn’t one for messy emotions but it appeared that he’d really liked Tessa a lot. Chaos still wasn’t speaking to him and Joker had told him he was a fucking asshole every time he saw him. Nope, they didn’t approve at all.

  Damn, looked like he was heading over to Tessa’s to return this shit.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Buck stood in the middle of the closet, rage seething inside him as he stared at the empty hangers and shelves. Empty, the whole fucking house was empty. She’d left. Tessa had left and she hadn’t even told him she was leaving. It was crazy that he thought she would. That he thought she should after he’d barely spoken to her for almost a month—after he’d repeatedly ripped her heart to shreds on purpose. But here he was, his head pounding with his mind raging like an angry beast because she wasn’t where she ought to be.

  All his carefully thought-out ideas about what would happen when he did the right thing didn’t mean shit as he stared at the emptiness of the closet. He couldn’t do this. He wasn’t going to allow this because in every scenario he’d come up with about her, none of them had included him not being able to know she was okay. None of them had featured her leaving him when he fucking owned her—when she was his. His body trembled with pent-up wrath and he felt every good intention he’d tried to have shrivel up and die.

  He stomped out of the closet, his head clearing as the pain from his hangover was burned away by the knowledge that she’d left him blistering across his skin like flames. His heavy steps coming down the hall must have warned the two prospects that he wasn’t in the mood to be fucked with because they jumped up and stood at attention.

  “Put everything back in this house. Call Joker, he knows how it goes.” He didn’t stop, he just walked out of the house to his bike with a roaring in his ears. He jerked his phone free from his jeans pocket, dialing the number with hard stabs of his finger.

  “What?” Dice’s rude voice barked over the line.

  “Find her,” he grunted.

  “Who?” Dice asked after a short pause.

  “Tessa. Find her,” he clipped, his hand almost crushing the phone as he held it to his ear, not in the mood for any bullshit.

  “Did you lose her?”

  “She left. Now fucking find her,” he growled.

  “She probably just went home, Buck,” Dice said reasonably and he realized that Dice was likely correct. She’d gone back to that compound where she likely thought she was safe from him. But she wasn’t. Not now. Not when she’d left him. He was going to get his woman and she’d better not try to run again or he was going to paddle her backside.

  Buck stood outside the gate glaring at the men who’d confirmed that Tessa was here but refused to let him have her. Choke was currently trying to negotiate with the men but they weren’t having any of it. Buck wasn’t taking no for an answer. He glared at Diego, Grant and Dale who stood between the two gates in the electric fence that prevented him from getting to Tessa. She wasn’t going to be safe in there even if these three buffoons thought they could protect her this way.

  “You’re not talking to my daughter. She was torn up when she arrived a week ago and I won’t have that asshole anywhere near her. He has no reason to be here because we made damned sure all his shit was returned to him like she asked us to.” Diego was growling as he stood with his legs apart, an AK-47 on his shoulder and a grim expression on his face.

  “Look. Property is a debatable subject at the moment.” Choke glanced at him with a little glare but Buck didn’t give a single fuck.

  When they had arrived an hour ago he’d asked to speak with her and when her uncle had refused, Buck had told that fucker he wasn’t keeping him from his property and he’d damned well better get his ass out of the fucking way. That had the three men bristling and growling because they didn’t understand. He’d never explained himself to anyone and he wasn’t about to start now. They’d learn that Tessa was his and not a single person on this earth was going to prevent him from claiming her.

  “No, it’s not, asshole. My niece is not a piece of land your idiotic friend can claim like he’s landing on Plymouth Rock,” Grant growled looking grim.

  “Old man, you need to go get Tessa before I lose my shit,” Buck growled, taking a step forward ready to be done with this posturing contest when Dice grabbed him and jerked him back. Buck turned on him, intending to punch him in the face but Joker grabbed his arms and the two men dragged him back out the gates towards the bikes.

  “Stop fighting us, you fucking idiot,” Dice muttered, earning a hard elbow to his side as payment.

  “No, damn it, I am going to go in there and get Tessa. She’s mine. They won’t keep her from me and neither will you two,” Buck roared, earning a knock to the back of his head when Chaos came up behind them.

  “You idiot. We’re trying to help you fix your mistake. The least you can do is let us!” Dice muttered, rubbing his jaw where Buck had just managed to punch him when he’d jerked his arm free from Joker’s hold.

  “Just chill the fuck out so we can.”

  “How is dragging me away from the entrance going to help me talk to Tessa?” Buck demanded.

  “Dice has hacked their system and found out where Tessa is and how to get you inside,” Chaos muttered, shaking his head. Why hadn’t they told him that to begin with? Buck turned to Dice.

  “How?” he asked.

  Tessa sighed staring up at the sky, watching the clouds drift by in fluffy white puffs. It was something she’d done with her grandmother many times over the years. She felt a little pang in her stomach when she remembered her abuela. She still missed her but the agonizing pain she’d felt the last time she was living here was gone, healed by the time she’d spent with the Grave Diggers MC.

  Thinking about them brought to mind Buck and she let out a shaky breath because thinking about him still pained her. He’d given up on them without a second thought and she still didn’t know why. Coming here wasn’t the answer to her pain as she’d hoped it would be. Yes, seeing her sisters and the rest of her family had helped to ease some of her pain but she wasn’t happy here today any more than she had been when she left. Tessa had already decided to go back—not to Buck but to the place she’d made her home. Her friends were there and a life. Maybe it wasn’t the one she’d thought she’d created but it was still her life now. She’d been happy there even before she’d begun having mind-blowing sex with Buck.

  Besides, her uncles and father seemed to think they should throw men at her to try and help her heal. It wasn’t helping and their current candidate was more annoying than a flea on a dog’s backside. He’d petitioned to be a part of the compound for several years and a few months back he’d managed to win a bid and get a job working as a water reclamation and purification specialist. That job came with a spot at the compound. Her pappy and her uncles had thrown the man at her at every turn because they thought he would be good for her. Mostly because he wanted to be a part of the compound, unlike her previous lover.

  She smiled a little despite the pain thoughts of Buck caused her because she couldn’t imagine a man like Buck, who liked to roam on his bike when he was a little blue or just because it was a nice day, living trapped behind electric fences. She knew he’d never make it more than a week before he’d be running to his bike to escape. Carlos, the man they were pushing on her, was good at his job, which made him an arrogant son-of-a-bitch—one who thought she would love him just because he was handsome. Maybe if he’d talk about something besides how awesome he was she might be able to like him.

  She didn’t want him, or any man other than Buck for that matter. She just
wanted to spend some time healing her heart before she worried about finding the right soul mate—what a cheesy name for a lover—not that she thought there was one out there for her. She might have believed she’d found him and was going to live out her days with him a few months ago but she’d apparently been wrong. Buck had never loved her as he’d proved time and time again over the past few weeks. It was sad and it hurt—a lot. Watching a cloud morph from a bunny into a dragon with a missing leg, she knew that she’d eventually move on with her life and find the right man but for now she was content to just be.

  A dark shadow fell over her and she glanced at the male figure standing above hoping like hell it wasn’t Carlos. To her shock and surprise, it was Buck. She must have fallen asleep and dreamed him up, she surmised, because there was no reason for him to be here.

  She smiled. “Hello,” she murmured.

  “You left me,” her imaginary Buck said harshly, glaring at her darkly in a fashion she’d seen many times before.

  “No, you tossed me aside,” Tessa argued, even though there was no point because he was just an idyllic dream she was having.

  “I was trying to protect you but you left me and I can’t allow that,” her vision insisted, making a smile spread across her lips.