The Barbarian and His Lady (The Friendship Series Book 8)

by Julia Donner

  Allison felt her eyes widen. “Which makes me a constant reminder of her infidelity.”

  “Precisely. Having now met your father in a private setting, I suspect that he doesn’t care in the least about her fidelity. I think the rub is that his pride did not allow him to cast you off. You are the living fact that he cannot sire a child and yet public proof that he is not impotent. Men are quite sensitive about that sort of thing.”

  Allison raised a still trembling hand to her throat then to her cheek. So many emotions clogged her chest. It all made sense in a sickening sort of way. Enlightenment swirled with the memory of the recent interview with her father as her friends looked on. It didn’t bear thinking about. All of it, so vulgar and humiliating.

  She stiffened when Cameron entered. She felt some relief when she saw no evidence of blood. “Elizabeth, would you allow me to speak to Allison alone?”

  “Certainly. Did Asterly save that toad’s life?”

  “Regrettably, yes, but I don’t think it was his first choice. He’s a blood thirsty fellow, your husband.”

  Lady Asterly fondly smiled. “Yes. It’s one of his best qualities. So helpful when bothered by annoying rivals.” She stood after a pat on Allison’s hand. “Don’t wear her out. She should have a rest before dinner.”

  He opened the door for Lady Asterly and came back to the couch to kneel by her knee. “Allison?”

  Unable to face him, she swiveled on the seat. In the next instant, strong hands wrapped around her upper arms and lifted her to stand. “Allison, he is gone. If you will allow me, I will do whatever it takes to keep him away from you.”

  She tried to withdraw, to hide her face, but he wrapped his arms around her. “Forgive me. I shouldn’t have said that we were promised, but I couldn’t think of a way to stop him without physically evicting him from the room. It wasn’t my place to interfere, but I could no longer tolerate the way he tormented you. He was so focused on hurting you. It is no wonder that you never speak of your family. Bless Albert for taking you away from him.”

  She couldn’t tell him that her mother’s tongue inflicted worse. A shudder, the aftermath of the reunion with her father and the ever-painful memory of her mother’s loathing choked off an answer. His arms pulled her closer, and she allowed her cheek to rest against his chest. Never in her life had she felt so safe. Nothing could reach her within this embrace. His hands moved up and down her back. Warmth came through her clothes. The need to savor this respite from the aloneness of her life wiped away the painful memories. Someday she might learn to accept why her parents hated her but not forgive them for inflicting so much pain on an innocent child. She didn’t want to sully this moment by thinking about it and yet, the visit provided a reason for present comfort. Cameron’s embrace almost made it worth the horror of seeing her father again, the revisiting of past heartache, and infliction of fresh wounds.

  She started to withdraw, but he held her fast. She resettled against his chest. “Cameron, I’m not angry with you. I doubt I ever could be. I think I know now why my parents hate me. Their loathing was always made quite clear that they did, but I never knew the reason why until discussing it with Lady Asterly. She is so clever and pointed out what I was too involved to see. I will come to live with their betrayal, their vulgarity in time, but that does nothing to help my regret that my friends were exposed to Father’s unpleasantness.”

  “His behavior isn’t natural. It was as if you had to be the recipient of his rage.”

  She rubbed her cheek on his waistcoat. “Could we not talk about him any more? It is no use. My parents will never change.”

  His hand slid up over her shoulder to her cheek, lifting her head. Sadness and frustration swam in his gaze. “You poor thing. What you need is mothering, and mine will help.”

  Fear wormed its way into this peaceful interlude. She could not imagine taking the step to meet his family. There were still aspects, shocking secrets no one knew about. Drawn by his gaze, she vaguely realized that his hand now encased her neck. Fingertips caressed her nape. His thumb lifted her chin. His mouth fell softly over hers. Surprise stilled her as pleasure saturated her body and eased her faltering soul. She became aware of his strength, his size and a fine quivering in his arms. Then his lips slanted, parting hers and she welcomed him inside. Her fingers dug into his shoulders. Heat flared in her face, searing downward, chasing away the cold hurt in her chest. There was only the feel of his touch roaming her back, pressing her closer as she lifted on tiptoe and clutched, unable to get enough. She needed him inside and all around her. His urgent groan entered her mouth, and she stiffened from a streak of piercing delight, the surge of passion that only this man could evoke.

  He released her and stepped back, holding her at arms length. “Sorry. So sorry, Allison.” She started to speak but he rushed on, “That was wrong. Taking advantage of you that way.”

  “Cameron. Stop. Please.” She gazed up into the regret in his eyes. “There is no need to apologize. The pain is gone. You’ve helped me.”

  Worry faded from his gaze and flared with a new intent that made her shiver, but this time in an exciting way. She clasped her hands behind her back to stop herself from grabbing him, pulling him back, giving in to the addictive need. It had never been like this with Albert. At least, she didn’t remember it being so. It had been poignant and tender, but not this excited craving, the wild desperation. She felt her head tilt to one side as she studied his face, absorbing the thrill of his hunger. For her. For them together. Invisible cords connected them, drawing her closer, as if she could crawl inside his broad chest and surround his stalwart heart. He radiated an intensity that made her legs weaken and heart pound.

  “Allison, do you know what you are inviting when you look at me like that?”

  Pinching her lips to stop the trembling, she gathered courage to answer. “I believe I do. Would you mind?”

  He captured her wrist and pulled her from the room and up the stairs. “We’ll go to my room. No one will come there at this time of day. Bailey will make sure we’re not interrupted.”

  Before he could open the door to his rooms, another footman came up the steps, calling, “Lieutenant?”

  Cameron glanced at her. Heat filled her cheeks when he pulled her behind his back to address the footman. “What is it?”

  “You have callers, sir.”

  “I? Who is it?”

  “Your family, sir. Mrs. Bradford and your sister have arrived. Her ladyship sent me to bring you down. She is otherwise occupied and regrets that she cannot entertain them.”

  “Thank you. Tell my family that I’ll be down directly.”

  When the servant left, he turned around and hugged her close. “Allison, come down with me to meet them.”

  She had suffered agonies from the idea of meeting her father again, but this was much worse. She couldn’t imagine meeting his mother and sister. What if they found her lacking, as unpalatable as her parents did? The impulse to flee flooded a chill down her limbs. She stilled the urge, molded her features to reflect a calmness she didn’t feel, and stepped back from his embrace.

  “Later, Cameron. I will meet them later. You must go down to them immediately. I can join you after a time of private reunion. This is not the moment for introductions. It is only right that they should have you all to themselves.”

  “Nonsense, Allison. I want to introduce you as soon as possible. They know I’ve been anxious that you should like them.”

  He’d taken her arms again. She gently pulled free. “That is not the issue. I still wish for you to enjoy this time with them. They’ve worried and missed you for so many years. I have no doubt they resent every moment separated from you. And there is the house you’ve arranged for them. You need to tell them about it. Get them settled, then we can meet.”

  After searching her face, he grinned. “You are much too sensible, Allison, but Mother taught me to do as I am told when a lady speaks.”

  She smiled, fearing her stiff
lips would give her away. He didn’t seem to notice when he swiftly kissed her and disappeared down the steps. As soon as he was gone, she went to her room to prepare to flee, but Rose, the Asterly House maid assigned to her, came hurrying from the direction of the servant stairs.

  Rose bobbed a curtsey. “Mrs. Davidson, if you would come with me. Her ladyship is asking that you join her immediately.”

  Quelling disappointment, Allison asked, “Is she unwell?”

  In a frightened whisper, Rose relayed, “She’s having pains, ma’am. You know. The baby. Isn’t this too soon?”

  Why did everything have to happen at the same time? Her desperate need to flee evaporated even as she thought that.

  Allison found her medicine box and opened the lid to scan the contents. The pouch sat nestled in the corner. “Where is her ladyship?”

  “Her rooms, ma’am. His lordship has gone out. Mr. Crimm has sent someone to fetch him back. Will you come, ma’am? We’re all that scared.”

  “Of course I will, and I know the way to her apartments. Come along after you inform everyone below stairs. There may be much to do in a short period of time.”

  Chapter 20

  It was indeed time for the birth. Lady Asterly gripped the bed coverlet in a white-knuckled grip, her complexion pale and eyes wide. Four maids hovered, hand-wringers, who needed instruction to calm the terror-choked room.

  Allison pitched her voice at a low, comforting level. “Good afternoon, Lady Asterly. It seems that you are to be blessed with unexpected company.”

  Lady Asterly jerked a nod. “Much too early. What’s to be done? Will the baby be well?”

  Allison set the box on the nightstand. “Allow me to direct the staff before I answer that question.” She looked at the hovering servants. “Who is my lady’s personal maid?”

  A sensible looking woman stepped forward and Allison said, “You will direct the maids. I will need a quantity of warm water. A basin of it immediately to bathe her ladyship while the room is prepared. Select her most comfortable nightwear. The cleanest linens only, placed out of the way but nearby. Everyone is to do their utmost to maintain calm in this room and throughout the house. Bring Lord Asterly here as soon as he arrives.”

  She paid no attention to the maids, who steadied once they had work to keep them occupied. Allison opened the medicine box, removed the pouch and pried Lady Asterly’s left hand from the linen. She dropped the stone into her upturned palm.

  “What is this, Allison?”

  “I call it a Comfort Stone. It’s quite attractive, isn’t it?”

  Lady Asterly studied the smooth, cream-colored rock. It’s hue slowly turned a subtle orange-pink. “It’s changing color.”

  “Yes, concentrate on that for a moment.”

  Allison spoke, gentle and slow, explaining how the stone absorbed the pain, and how the color changes revealed stages of the birthing process. In minutes, Lady Asterly’s shoulders relaxed as she concentrated on the stone and listened to Allison’s soothing tone.

  “Are you feeling better, my lady?”

  “It’s quite amazing, but yes. Certainly not so frightened.”

  “Very good. Now, you must put all recollections of the twin’s birth behind you. Those memories can resurface at this time and must not become a part of today.”

  “But the baby, so early.”

  “Perhaps not, my lady. Every pregnancy is different. This time, you carry one child instead of two. The first confinement is frequently longer in duration than any births that follow. I suspect that you are actually closer to the birthing date than you supposed or were told. After you bathe, we will walk around the room.”

  “Walk? Shouldn’t I stay abed?”

  “No, my lady. Allow your maid to bathe you. This will relax and refresh you.”

  Lord Asterly had still not arrived by the time Lady Asterly had been bathed, dressed in a fresh nightgown, walked, and tucked back into the bed. Allison was in the middle of explaining that the birth would not happen in the bed, but beside the bed, where the carpet had been rolled up and a pad of folded linens placed on the floor. These instructions confused her patient, but further explanations were interrupted by the sound of boots pounding up the stairs and thumping down the passageway.

  Asterly didn’t knock and burst through the door, striding directly to the bed. He swept a glance over Allison, then trained his attention on his wife. His hand, permanently darkened from months of living rough during the Peninsular War, cupped the side of his wife’s face.

  “Lizzie, what are you doing?”

  She gruffly answered, a hint of humor sparking her gaze, “It’s not my doing, my lord. Place the blame on your child, as obstinate and block-headed as you are.”

  He grinned, but worry shadowed his marine blue gaze. His eyes lost softness when they were turned her way. “What is happening, Allison?”

  “Not to worry. The time is early, but all will be well. I suggest you open a bottle and try to stay calm. It won’t be long now.”

  He scowled. “The confinement took two days last time.”

  Allison gave her head a tiny shake. “None of that, sir. No negativity. Maintain peace and quiet. Have something to settle your nerves. Fathers often suffer as much as their wives but in a different way, of course. Please tell the maids to stay in the passageway until I call them.”

  After a kiss on his wife’s brow, he reluctantly left the room. As soon as the door closed, Allison said, “Now, up you get for another stroll around the room.”

  Lady Asterly obeyed, sliding out of the high bed and stepping down. “It’s so strange, Allison. Since you handed me this stone, there’s scarcely been any pain at all. Not much more than those associated with monthly courses. Is that normal?”

  “As I said, every birthing is different.”

  “Because every child has its own personality?”

  “Yes, my lady, I think that is a charming way to explain it.” She placed her hand on Lady Asterly’s rounded belly. “Ah, that was a particularly sharp one.”

  “But it’s not painful, really. Sort of in the distance. There, but not uncomfortable. This stone you’ve given me is marvelous. And there is something about your touch. So calming and steadying.” She halted, hunched over, and groped for Allison’s hand. “Allison!”

  “Not to worry. It is time. Come stand on these linens.”

  “Isn’t it too soon? Shouldn’t we call for more help?”

  “All is well. Breathe slowly and concentrate on the stone. Allow your body to tell you when the baby must come out.”

  Before another hour had passed, Lady Asterly held a tiny daughter. Allison allowed the maids into the room to carry away the soiled linens and pass along the tidings that Lady Asterly was well and delivered of a girl.

  Lady Asterly stared at the wee babe in her arms with bewildered awe. “She’s so small and silent. Is she well?”

  “She’s tired. From all you’ve said before this, she was quiet while you carried her.”

  “That is true. Much of the time, I didn’t notice. You must understand my confusion. The last two were as large as this one and rambunctious from the moment they saw daylight. They’re still little fiends. Beautiful, but too full of themselves. This one is so placid, so pretty. All pink and soft and round. Thank you, Allison. This was an extraordinary experience. Nothing like the last time.”

  “It was my pleasure to be with you, and I believe I hear your husband on the stairs.” She motioned for a maid to step away from the doorway in time to not get clocked by Asterly’s sudden entrance.

  “Lizzie!” Wild-eyed, he strode to the bed where he stopped to stare. “It’s done? So soon?”

  The proud mother held up her baby. “Peregrine, look at her. She’s so tiny and didn’t cry at all. Allison says she’s perfectly healthy, and it wasn’t in the least bit difficult!”

  Allison left her medicine box on the nightstand, but kept her hand curled around the stone deep in her pocket. She quietly closed the d
oor on the sight of Asterly, kneeling by the bed, his brow propped on his wife’s hip, a hand gripping her thigh. He’d no doubt thought that the call to join his wife after so short a time had been for another reason.

  How many times had she walked away from that intimate scene? Even though happy for her friends, she never escaped the heartache, the longing to know for herself those precious moments after the birth, when mother and father shared the joy of a gift directly from God.

  Some fathers, like her own, didn’t care if the mother survived and only sought confirmation of an heir. But this day, she didn’t walk away from that kind of sterile, hard-hearted scene—primogeniture at its worst. She went back to her room to contend with the fact that she would likely never be a participant in the scene she just left.

  And her return to Callander would need to be postponed. The baby was at least a month early and would need careful watching for the following days. Once again, uncaring Fate had enacted a frustrating motive for keeping her in London. Every time she hoped to run, another reason for her to stay presented itself. At least she could use the excuse of watching over the newborn to stay hidden upstairs.

  Chapter 21

  Relief flooded through Cameron when he received a summons to attend Lady Asterly. A week had passed since the unexpected early birth. The infant had survived, and from all that he’d heard, it was due to Allison. He’d attempted to visit her, but she’d left word with the Asterly House staff that she would maintain constant attention on the baby until she was certain the fragile infant was out of danger. Lady Asterly’s request for him to call on her offered the opportunity to enter the house and not intrude before an acceptable waiting period had passed since the birth.

  When he arrived, it was immediately apparent that everyone at Asterly House had elevated Allison to saint status for saving both babe and mother. All requests to speak to Allison were turned away with kind regrets. Mrs. Davidson was attending the newest member of the household, the babe being quite fragile at this early stage. Being a man, Cameron could not insist upon encroachment into feminine territory.