by Bella Andre
“Thanks for taking such good care of him.”
“Always. How are things going down your way?”
Matt had explained the situation when he’d asked Will to take Noah. “Not as much luck as I’d like. Zach Smith was a great guy and filled Ari in on some of the past years, but he hasn’t seen Gideon since they got back.”
“Anything you need from me, just let me know.” Will didn’t know Ari well, but from the tone of his voice, Matt could tell he wished there’d been better news. “How’s Ari taking it?”
“She’s putting up a good front. We’ve got a couple of leads on where he intended to go after he got out, so hopefully those will turn up something positive. Can you keep Noah another night or two?”
“No problem. Mrs. Taylor made a huge batch of chocolate-chip cookies to keep him going. Here’s the little guy now.”
After Will handed Noah the phone, Matt said, “Hey, buddy, I hear you’re having lots of fun with everyone. I miss you so much.”
“I miss you too, Daddy. And Ari. She would have so much fun playing our game.”
“I know she would. She’s taking a bath, otherwise she’d be here to say hi too. She misses you—she told me that lots of times today.”
“Can you give her a good-night kiss for me?”
Matt swallowed past a lump in his throat. “Of course I can. She’ll love that.”
“Love you, Daddy! I gotta go, it’s my turn now.”
“A good-night kiss for your nanny, huh?” Will said when he picked up the phone.
Matt laughed as if Will was crazy for insinuating that he’d made anything sexual out of his kid’s sweet request. But even to his ears, that laughter sounded hollow.
Because he wanted nothing more than to give Ari a good-night kiss.
One that lasted all night long.
Chapter Eighteen
“What would you like to eat?” Matt asked over champagne. Their corner of the restaurant was out of the way, the lights low, candlelight flickering.
Ari fluttered the menu in front of her, setting off a breeze of the floral salts she’d bathed in. When he’d knocked on her door, the room had been awash in fragrance. And his mind had been awash in her.
Her lilac jacket made her cheeks bloom, and beneath her white T-shirt, the matching lilac bra was a tinge of color that shouldn’t have gotten his motor going. Yet the evidence of her lingerie revved him up, reminding him of the night he’d undressed her, the craziness of his need. Even now, he could remember how good—how sweet—she’d tasted.
“There are so many great choices, but the chicken Marsala looks good for tonight.”
“Are you ordering that because you really want it? Or because it’s the cheapest thing on the menu?” It was a five-star hotel with a five-star restaurant, white tablecloths, bone china, crystal glasses, and prices to match. “You can have anything you want, Ari.”
The heated look in her eyes sent electricity shooting through him. He wouldn’t pretend he didn’t know what she wanted. The same thing he wanted—and it had nothing to do with dinner. It was all he could do not to throw down his menu and drag her upstairs.
But he had to walk the straight and narrow, because nothing had changed since that steamy kiss in the pantry. She was still the best nanny Noah had ever had. Matt was still her boss. And blurring those lines could screw everything up. She’d had enough darkness in her life. He wouldn’t add to it by saddling her with his past or his failures.
Tamping down his desire with a Herculean effort, he asked, “Is there anything you haven’t tried?” Damn if that question didn’t make it worse when he thought of all the untried pleasures he could bring her.
Ari rescued him by saying, “Rack of lamb.”
He grabbed the conversational straw she offered. “You’ve never had lamb?”
“I had lamb chops once. My third foster family. There were six kids, and we each got a teeny-tiny one.” She demonstrated the size with her thumb and forefinger. “It wasn’t enough to decide if I liked them.”
“Then rack of lamb it is.” He wanted to give her all the things she’d never had enough of.
As soon as they’d ordered, he said, “I know how hard it was not getting the news you needed from Zach. I’m really sorry about that.”
“Why do you keep apologizing?” The waiter chose that moment to bring their salads. “Let me rephrase,” she said once the man walked away. “Please stop apologizing. I learned more about my brother today than I’ve heard in sixteen years. Alias Smith and Jones.” She smiled. “And a prankster. I loved learning that about him.” She twirled her fork in her fingers, clearly lost in her thoughts. “Gideon was always looking out for everyone. When I was a kid and things were bad, he always tried to make me smile. He must have done the same thing over there. That’s what you did for me today,” she said, a soft shimmer in her eyes. “You gave me pieces of my brother I wouldn’t have had otherwise. I don’t know how to thank you for that.”
“You don’t need to thank me.”
He didn’t point out that while they’d been able to find Zach Smith, finding her brother was still a very difficult proposition. He didn’t want to destroy her hope or her joy in the things she’d learned today. Matt loved how she always saw the bright side. Living with a mother who’d abandoned her for her next fix and then to foster care, Ari was a remarkably glass-half-full kind of woman.
She pushed the spring greens around on her plate. “I searched for three years,” she emphasized, leaning forward, dropping her voice to a near whisper that was raw with emotion. “I got nothing. But you make things happen just like that.” She snapped her fingers in the air. “You found Gideon’s friend. Someone who made him come alive in his words. So yes, I need to thank you.”
She made Matt feel like a hero, when really it was a matter of money and having contacts in the right places. But he wanted to be her hero. And he wouldn’t rest until he found her brother.
“I will find him for you.”
“I know.” She was so sweet in her faith in him. In the next moment, as their meals were laid in front of them, she burst out with, “Oh my God, will you look at that rack?”
Matt let go of a laugh that came straight from his belly, and the waiter dipped his head to hide his smile. If Ari had any idea of the double meaning, she didn’t give a hint.
She ate the way she did everything, with enthusiasm, moaning around a mouthful. The erotic sound kicked his pulse even higher.
“You’ve got to try some.” She held out a forkful she’d just cut.
He wanted nothing more than for her to feed him, so he cupped her hand to pull her closer as he let himself take what she was offering.
“To die for, right?”
Jesus, she didn’t know the half of it. Had no idea what was happening to him under the tablecloth or that his heart had powered up into heavy metal drumming mode.
“Try mine.” He dredged a hunk of lobster tail in butter.
She put her hand under the fork to catch a drop as her mouth closed around the tines. She slowly drew away, driving him a little mad. A lot mad. Eyes closed, her lashes long and lush, she moaned her appreciation. Then she licked the drop of butter from her palm.
When she opened her eyes, they shone with the knowledge of what she was doing to him. Sweet and seductive was one hell of a combination. One he wasn’t sure he’d be able to resist forever—even though he gave self-control his damned level best.
“Ever had lobster before?”
She shook her head, her smile half-cocked. “Like I said, SpaghettiOs were gourmet in my house.”
“Canned stew in mine.” He wanted her to know he’d been there too. They shared common beginnings, making them alike in so many ways, yet different in how they’d each reacted. “Watered down so it would stretch further.” Although his dad’s portion never got the extra water.
“Sometimes we’d fry just bread because there was no cheese for grilled cheese sandwiches.” She made another mmm sound
that tightened every muscle in his body. “Isn’t it amazing how you can invent really good stuff when you don’t have enough?”
He had never thought of the deprivation of his youth that way, yet he remembered how Susan and Bob had always brought joy into their house without much of anything. “At Christmas with the Mavericks and Susan and Bob, we had hot chocolate and made garlands out of paper and popcorn and hung it all on a fake ficus tree Bob rescued from the dump. Nobody cared it was made out of plastic. It was about being together.” Matt’s own home had been bare of decoration because his dad wouldn’t waste the money. With Bob and Susan, it had only been about the joy. The way Ari was all about hope.
“Gideon always found the perfect gift,” she told him. “It never cost a lot of money, but he never let us forget it was Christmas.”
“And after your brother left?”
Anyone else with her rough childhood would have gone down the rabbit hole at his question. Ari simply shrugged. “I was never as good at finding stuff. Gideon had a knack. He just cared so much.”
She was resilient, pulling the love she’d felt for her brother around herself like a warm coat, even after all these years apart. A lot of people would have been permanently beaten down by now. Not Ari. She’d triumphed.
No doubt about it, she was definitely Maverick material.
* * *
Matt refilled her champagne glass. Ari didn’t know how much she’d had, but she felt light and airy rather than drunk. Exchanging the lamb for lobster had been almost sexual, and the attraction between them sizzled barely beneath the surface. But the night was about so much more than just attraction.
They’d talked for hours, and it turned out that they shared so many common experiences from childhood. Of course, they also talked about all the things Noah did and said that cracked them both up. She adored hearing about the other Mavericks and Matt’s foster parents. She didn’t want dinner to end.
Just when they were about to get up from the table, his phone buzzed. Reading the screen, his expression grew serious. “Rafe just texted to let me know that Karmen Sanchez’s mother lives the closest, in Bakersfield. He also found her phone number.”
She wanted to rip the cell out of Matt’s hands to call the woman. But this wasn’t just about Ari, was it? She wasn’t the only person who had lost someone they loved. “Do you think it will open up old wounds for Karmen’s mom?”
Matt curled his fingers around hers, and her heart turned over as though she were doing somersaults on the trampoline.
“I don’t know.” His voice was so soft, his touch so gentle. “Maybe no one’s mentioned her daughter in years, and you’ll give her a chance to talk about her. To remember her.”
He astounded her with his insight. It was exactly what she’d been trying to say about Gideon—that the memories Zach Smith had given her were precious.
She thought of her mother, and how no one had talked about her after she’d died. Yes, she was a drug addict who had dragged her daughter from filthy apartment to dirty dive, one after the other. But Ari had loved her. “When my mom died and they took me away, it was like she didn’t exist anymore, as if talking about her would remind me of some terrible time.”
Matt’s hand tightened around hers, giving her his strength, his heat, his power. “But you wanted to remember, didn’t you?”
“I needed to. Not everything was totally bad. She loved me, and sometimes she’d hug me so hard I could feel that love deep inside.” She’d only been able to talk about this to Rosie and Chi. And now, after all these years, she was telling Matt. “How do you remember your parents?” In all the things they’d spoken of so far, they hadn’t shared this.
His hand flexed over hers, and she thought he might not answer until finally he said in a quiet voice, “I prefer to remember what it was like in Susan and Bob’s house.”
She melted for him, for the little boy who’d never found what he needed in his own home. Knowing that made her feel even closer to him. “Everyone’s different.” She offered him comfort with the rhythmic stroke of her thumb.
For a long moment, he watched her thumb go round and round on his hand, and the heat of his skin penetrated deep inside her. Finally, he raised his gaze from their linked hands. “Karmen’s mom could be like you, wanting to remember. Let’s call her now. It’s not too late.” Without letting go of her hand, he picked up his phone again and tapped the number his investigator had texted.
Her heart choking her throat, she listened to his gentle voice, his careful explanation, and finally his thank-you.
“Tomorrow,” he said. “She’d like to talk to us. We can be down there before noon.”
Ari wanted to throw herself at him, cover him with kisses, and show him how much what he’d done for her really meant. How much he meant.
Because in her heart, there was no going back.
Chapter Nineteen
“Thank you,” she said at her hotel room door. “Not just for dinner.” She put her hand on his arm, his tendons flexing beneath her fingertips. “For everything.”
The way he gazed at her had the breath catching in her throat. But instead of kissing her the way she so badly hoped he would, he said, “Breakfast at eight sound okay? And then we’ll get on the road.”
Of course she nodded. “It sounds great.” It seemed a crime to sleep alone after all they’d shared today, but unfortunately this wasn’t a decision she could make alone.
In her room, she wandered past the huge bed to the sitting area with its small sofa and two chairs surrounding a fireplace. Turning in a circle without sitting down, she finally realized the connecting door was still open. Crossing to close it, she saw Matt standing just beyond the door, his gaze on her as if he hadn’t looked away since she’d entered her room.
He’d given her such joy—the things she’d learned about Gideon today, the potential for what she might discover tomorrow. All of it encircled Matt, his generosity, his caring.
“I almost forgot to tell you.” His voice was raw with emotion and desire. “Noah wanted me to give you a good-night kiss.”
That was all it took. She didn’t think rationally, didn’t want to remind herself that this relationship could never work unless they were both fully on board.
Her body cared only about what she wanted, needed.
Craved.
She threw herself at him, almost launching into the air, and he caught her, hauling her high against him until she wrapped her legs tightly around his waist and curled her arms around his neck. He slammed the connecting door shut and shoved her up against it, his mouth on hers, kissing her until her breath mingled with his as though they were one.
He was so hard between her legs, and she was miles beyond hot, wet, and ready. She kissed him with ferocity, hugged him tighter, moaned her need into his mouth.
Pinning her body to the door, he held her face in his hands, dropping kisses over her cheeks, her mouth, her ear, tipping her head to get at her throat. He bit her neck lightly, then trailed back to her ear, kissing her until she trembled with desire.
“What do you want?” he whispered.
“Everything.” She wasn’t afraid to admit it. But she didn’t want to go there alone. She needed him to be as fearless as she was. “What do you want?”
“You.” Something rough and potent in his voice took that single word far beyond the physical. “I want to strip you down, bare you one gorgeous inch at a time, and love you the way you deserve to be loved.”
Everything inside her turned to liquid fire under the heat of his gaze. He let her slide to the floor, stepping back to look down at her. His fingers traced her curves with barely a touch, making it all the more intoxicating.
Then he skimmed beneath the lapels of her jacket. “I looked at you across the table tonight, the lilac jacket…” He pushed it off her shoulders, let it drop to the carpet, and rested his hands at her waist. “The white shirt…” He tugged it from her jeans, began drawing it up, the backs of his fingers ho
t against her skin.
She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak, couldn’t even say his name to beg for more.
When he pulled the cotton over her head, he stared down at her with such heat in his eyes that she felt spotlighted by his desire. As if she were the only woman he wanted, the only one he’d ever want.
“There it is,” he whispered. “All that pretty purple lingerie. I saw the hint of it beneath your shirt, and you have no idea what that did to me.” He slid one finger beneath the strap of her bra, brushing down, coming perilously close to her nipple as he dipped into the cup. Then he pulled the straps off her shoulders, letting them hang a moment down her arms. Decadent. Sexy.
Unbearably erotic.
He toyed with her, his hands at the zipper of her jeans, driving her crazy. Finally, he slipped the top button loose. “I wonder if your panties match that lovely lilac.” He drew on the zipper, hissed out a breath as he saw the fabric of her panties. “Hell, yes. You can make a man wild with imagining what’s beneath all these clothes.” Then he hooked his fingers inside her waistband and stripped off her jeans. All the way down, going on his haunches before her. “God, you’re beautiful.”
He pulled everything off, including her shoes, as she braced herself on his shoulder. His skin burned even through his shirt. Then he looked up at her, his gaze following the length of her body, his eyes as hot as a wildfire. Rising slowly, he let his fingers take the path his gaze had moments before. She trembled for him.
“I need to touch you.” He seduced her with his words, his heat, the way he snapped open her bra in the front and moved to circle her nipple with one possessive stroke. She was naked except for the tiny bikini panties.
And she was all his for the taking.
“I need to have you, skin on skin. Now.” With that, he stripped away the final wisp of fabric covering her. “You steal my breath. My sanity.” His admissions were raw with heat—and emotion.