In This Life

by Leo Sullivan

  “Fuck’em! Man, at this point in my life, I don’t have nothin’ to lose,” Freddy said, exhausted. He then added, “Sasha thinks that Marilyn is my aunt, although she is very suspicious…and Marilyn doesn’t know that Sasha is staying here.”

  “So, you’re playin’ both of the, huh?” Dee said admiringly.

  “No, I didn’t mean for it to turn out this way… Sasha tricked me into bringing her here, and I never wanted to take advantage of Marilyn, but she offered me help at a time when I was desperate.” Freddy stopped to think for a moment. “Y’all won’t believe this, but they both actually worked together without even knowing it, and they saved me from that cop, Mark Fermen.” Freddy gave them the details of his and Sasha’s narrow escape from the hospital and how they had eluded the cops with a wheelchair.

  “Anyway, here’s the deal. When Marilyn calls, I’ll tell her about our plans and we’ll let her get in contact with her attorneys and just go from there.”

  “What about you Fred? Damn, kid, you don’t look too good,” Mykle said, turning serious as he pointed at the wound.

  “I’m gonna try to find a buyer for the jewels. Right now, I have them stashed with the rest of the cash at a safe place where no one will ever find them.” Freddy stopped talking for a moment, and then added, “Oh… er… I’m going to marry Sasha. She’s pregnant with my child.”

  “Pregnant!” Dee shouted in surprise.

  “Yep, she’s pregnant and I love her. Man, me and her have been through a lot--” Stunned, they both looked at him as if he had just committed an act of betrayal, the worst kind of treason. Maybe he’s just joking, they both thought as they looked at him closer, expecting him to say, “Psyche! Just joking.” But Freddy wore that I’m-dead-serious scowl on his face as he continued to stroke that ugly scar, staring at it as if it would bring him some kind of wish. Freddy had knocked them completely off balance, and from this day forward, their once juvenile escapades would now be manly excursions into life in America.

  Chapter Sixteen

  The door opened and Sasha walked in carrying a handful of bags. She wore a new outfit, white shorts with a matching halter-top. Her pecan brown skin contrasted with the thin cotton material clinging tightly to the symmetries of her well-proportioned and generous curves. As soon as she saw how Dee was staring between her legs, she wanted to give him a piece of her mind, but she knew it looked like she had a fat rabbit in her shorts. Instantly, she regretted buying the clothes, as all of them stared at her. But when Freddy looked up at her and smiled, she decided it was worth it.

  She placed the bag with the hot chicken dinners on his lap and walked to the kitchen with the rest of the groceries. After she put everything up, she returned to the living room. Chicken bones and the empty bags cluttered the floor, and Freddy lay asleep on the couch. Dee sat on the carpet, watching her every move. Mykle was perched in front of the stereo, looking through Marilyn’s record albums.

  Sasha sat on the couch next to Freddy, that damn boy still watching her. She nudged Freddy awake. She held a glass of water in her hand along with two white pills. Freddy awoke dreamy eyed. “Hello, handsome. I had your prescription filled.” She beamed at him with the pride of a young woman happy to have accomplished an important task. He made a face at her, she read his mind. “No, I didn’t try to get it filled in Ford City. I drove out of town.” She placed the pills in his mouth one at a time, and he washed them down with the water. “I’m running your bath water… Baby, you’re going to have to keep that thing clean,” she said with obvious concern.

  They entered a spacious bathroom with walls of mosaic tile depicting colorful scenes of ancient Egypt, the fixtures and mirror frames made of gold. The floor tile was checkered in ivory and dark, gold-veined marble, in the center of which sat a Jacuzzi tub the size of a small swimming pool, it’s steaming water bubbling with the delicious fragrance of jasmine.

  He looked at Sasha, and her brown almond eyes twinkled with secrets yet to be revealed, like nectar dripping from an untasted melon. She took a step back and began to wiggle out of her halter-top, entertainment for his eyes-only. Her full breasts swayed pendulously, nipples erect, sepia in hue, her intent serious, purposeful. She stripped down to her birthday suit and then helped him out of his clothes. His attraction for her was obvious. In spite of her carefully planned strategy, she smiled at the sight of his rigid nudity, the lust in his eyes. She helped him into the tub.

  The water’s warm, titillating sensation relaxed him soothingly. He watched as Sasha eased back from the tub. Walking over to a compartment, she opened a door and fumbled around inside, and then the room was filled with soft melodies, the Isley Brothers singing, “I’ll always come back to you…” She began to dance rhythmically to the music, her svelte, curved body oscillating slowly, parading proudly, while her eyes held him. She pranced back to the tub with sponge in hand.

  Freddy reached out to take her in his arms, her nubile body soft, sensuous to his touch. In pure ravenous elation his hands searched her body, and she moaned softly as she cuffed his wrist with her hand, prohibiting any further exploring of her body. Gently, she pushed him away and began to bathe his body with the sponge. Quizzically, he watched her. She tried to quell him with her eyes, alarmed that he could not read her. The water’s sheen lay golden on her breast as little droplets distilled off her nipples. He leaned forward to taste one… The bubbles burst, waters swayed, the music played.

  She eased her mouth to his neck, whispering, “Freddy…” His name hung in the air. “We’re going to have to wait.”

  “Wait for what?” he mumbled as his hands wandered, caressing her nether lips.

  She moaned, “I… fell we need to… wait until we’re married before… we have… sex again.” Freddy gurgled his tongue, as the music seemed to scratch somewhere in his mind. “Plus, you’re a high risk factor to me and the baby. All your personal problems are going to have to get solved first. If we’re going to bring a new life into this world, we have to plan and carefully prepare.” She had now regained her composure.

  Freddy looked at her and rubbed himself. “Sasha, please don’t start this now. I promise I’ll marry you. Just lemme put the head in, okay? You wouldn’t use sex as a tool to get me to marry you, would you?”

  She just looked at him as she pulled away and stood up. Soapsuds ran down her body, water glistening off her skin like glaciers melting in the Antarctic. Succulent beads of water cascaded down her thighs, a patch of bubbles nestled in her pubic triangle. She began to wash her breasts with the sponge. Freddy could take no more.

  “Okay, okay. I said I would marry you!”

  “When?” She stopped her performance, looking down at him smugly.

  “… As soon as you give me some.”

  She hit him with the sponge, looking as if she was about to cry. “I don’t want my baby to be a bastard child,” she said sullenly, “Plus, the respect of my family and how I want to live my life with you are what matter most to me.”

  “Okay, we’ll do it this week.” He reached out his hand for her.

  “When, boy?” she asked adamantly.

  “Shasha, please! We’ll do it today… call Dee in here an he can marry us right now! Just give me a little bit…?”

  She looked for something else to hit him with. “Freddy, I’m serious!” she said pouting as she plunged into the tub, water splashing. She turned to him, words filled with venom. “Freddy, so help me God, you’re going to marry me!” She then added, “Oh, and today is the 29th. I know you and your pals are going to steal that lady’s car and try one of your disappearing acts.” She waived her finger in his face. “Only this time, there will be none of that! Your battered and bruised ass is under my care and I’m not letting you out of my sight. Boy, what you need to be plotting on is getting me a wedding ring. And the legal guardian you’re going to need because of your age. In two weeks, I turn eighteen.”

  Freddy looked at her as it dawned on him that she had carefully planned everything
, right up to this moment. Feeling threatened, he wondered if it was true, were girls really smarter than boys? All of a sudden, those pills she had given him kicked in, hitting him like a ton of bricks. His words became disjointed, jumbled. “Pills… strong… I can’t… can’t feel my tongue… damn… Sashaaa…”

  “The doctor said to give you one pill every ten hours, but I give you two because you were in so much pain,” she said as his eyes began to flutter, a dribble of saliva trailing from his mouth. He went into a nod. In baby talk, she cooed, whispering, “That’s mamma’s baby. I’ma take care of that baby.” Vaguely he heard her words as his mind drifted off to la-la land, and sadly he felt his once elongated penis shrivel up. In the drug-induced haze, somewhere in the dark quarters of his numb mind, Sasha hummed a lullaby, water wrung from a sponge as she began to bathe his body from head to toe. “This is right here where you need to be, right here with me, in my loving arms. Who said that two pills weren’t better than one.” She giggled, thinking boys were so dumb.

  Afterwards, she led him to Marilyn’s bedroom. Inside was a custom king-sized bed. The room looked familiar as he staggered over to the bed opening his eyes, the eeriness… mirrors…mirrors…horror… The guresome décor reminded him…reminded him… Pow! Billy Dawson standing behind him, the dark, a blue flash of light danced across the metachromatic screen of his mind as he lay there on the bed.

  Sasha lotioned his body. He closed his eyes, and then suddenly he flinched, grabbing hold of the soft mound of her thigh, his hand leaving a welt on her flesh. His roughness felt strangely good to her, and she realized her passion was just as strong as his. Finally, he slept and she watched him until her feminine urge was overwhelming. She kissed his lips while her hands roamed his body. She giggled to herself as she played with Buddy. To her utter amazement, she was surprised that it would respond so enormously. Boys could have an erection in their sleep? How interesting…she was learning.

  The next morning, Freddy awakened drowsy, his cerebellum numb. He strained his mind, “Where am I?… What time is it?…” The room, the mirrors reflected the rich, palatial splendor, its luxury… As he adjusted his eyes, it all came back to him.

  He smelled the delicious aroma of bacon and eggs. He was famished. Painfully, he eased his body out of the bed. Regardless of the pain, today he felt stronger. As he stood yawning, he noticed some kind of ointment on his chest. He looked down in shock, “What the?…” He was clad in a tiny pair of blue silk underwear.

  “Sashaaaa!” he yelled, looking down at his pathetic midriff. He searched for his clothes, but Sasha had hidden them, so he finally gave up. There was no way he was going to step out in the hallway and let his boys see him dressed lie that. He ambled over to the large-screen television. As he reached to turn it on, he noticed that his fingernails were shining; they had been painted with clear polish and manicured. “Fuckin’ Sasha,” he thought as he turned the set on, wondering what else she had done to him while he was asleep.

  ABC’s Geraldo Rivera’s telegenic face stared at him as he turned up the volume. The presidential scandal was in full swing. Even though Freddy was apolitical and couldn’t understand half the big words the reporter was using…, “recuse himself… impeachment…,” what caught his attention was the face of the handsome little black boy the reporter was now showing on the screen. The boy looked identical to the President. White people could get away with anything, Freddy thought as they showed the resemblance of the President and the boy. Sasha walked in with a shit-eating grin on her face, carrying a breakfast tray.

  “What are you looking all goofy about? He asked while taking the tray from her hands. Girlishly, she giggled, pointing at his underwear and then reaching down and pulling on the elastic band. It snapped against flesh. “Ouch! Sasha, stop playing so much.” She laughed at him, pointing at his butt as he turned and walked to the bed with his food. “Where’s my underwear?” he asked.

  “You look cute in them,” she teased, her eyes sparkling giddily.

  “You wear them then,” Freddy said as he took a bite of his bacon-and-egg sandwich.

  “I would, but they’re too small for me,” she laughed. She walked over and sat down next to him, her attention on the television. “Who’s that cute little boy?” she asked.

  “That’s the little black kid that the President is denying is his son.

  Sasha smacked her lips in disdain. “That’s a damn shame. All you men are alike…dogs.”

  “Wha’ did I do?” Freddy asked, sensing her sudden anger.

  “You ain’t done nothin’, but if I let you, you’d probably try to pull the same thing with me.” She ignored him, leaning forward. “That boy looks just like the President,” she said to the news reporter as he continued to divulge all the incriminating facts that he had uncovered about the case. Freddy opened his mouth to speak, she shushed him. Sasha was immersed in the tale of infidelity and a liaison that had resulted in the bastard child. “That man needs to be castrated!” she vented. Freddy eased slightly away from her.

  “…The President also refuses to take a blood test, saying that it would be a direct violation of his constitutional rights and that it would also hinder his ability to serve the American people…” Sasha cringed as she listened to the reporter quote the President.

  “That’s crap,” Sasha huffed.

  The phone rang, both of them stared at it. He knew who it was, and judging by the way Sasha was staring at him, he had an uncanny feeling she was reading his mind. She reached over and picked it up before he could, and the change in her expression made him feel uncomfortable.

  She handed him the phone, watching his every move as he spoke into the receiver. “Hello?”

  “Hi baby,” a soft sultry voice greeted. “Do you miss me sweetheart?” Marilyn asked.

  Freddy glanced at Sasha, readying himself to duck. “Yes.”

  “You don’t sound too happy to hear from me…” he looked at Sasha while listening to the raspy voice on the phone. “Did I surprise you by bringing your friends over there?

  “Thank you, Marl,” he said, quickly changing the subject. “Remember what you said about getting the lawyers to help us with this case?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, Dee and Mykle want to turn themselves in today.”

  “What about you Freddy?” she asked with concern in her voice. There was a long pause.

  “Not now, Marl,” he said, frustrated.

  “Okay Freddy, whatever you want… except one thing.” She spoke slow and deliberately. “I don’t mind you having that little girlfriend because I know eventually you’ll grow out of that just as you’ll learn to enjoy the finer things in life… my life… but promise me that you’ll never ever bring that hoochie momma into my condo, okay? Anyway, I’ll have the lawyer come by there today.” He looked over at Sasha. She was leaning forward as if the could hear bits of the conversation.

  “Freddy, I have some bad news… I’m going to have to stay here an extra two weeks, if not longer. The good news… I got the leading role! These white folks sure make it hard for a sistah, and that Mel Gibson is going to be a real drag to work with. My agents are having a hard time making these people understand that I deserve the same amenities as the rest of the stars. You should see the size of my dressing room trailer compared to Gibson’s…” And then her voice changed. “Freddy, I have a surprise for you… Freddy?… Freddy?!”

  He had not heard a word she had said. He was watching Sasha with her fists clenched at her sides, lips pressed tightly across her teeth as if she about to jump on him.

  “Freddy, are you all right…?”

  “Yes, yes…” he answered. “I’m just tired and not feeling very well. I took some medication that has me feeling drowsy.”

  “Freddy,” she then whispered in hushed tones, “I think someone has been following me… Oh, I have to go… here comes my publicist. I’m about to do a shoot for next month’s Ebony, and then I’m off shopping for a new home for us in Hollywoo
d. I love you, Freddy. Bye!”

  “Bye,” he said into the dead receiver.

  Sasha stood up, nostrils flaring, hips spread in indignation of a black woman’s temperament. “You must really think that I ain’t too bright or something.” She waived her hand in his face. “I know what’s going on between you two, and that’s where you got all that money from. I’m not a fool though… I went through your pants while you were asleep and I found close to five-thousand dollars… thanks for the donation. Freddy, don’t try to play me and end up gettin’ played yourself. I have no intentions of disrupting all your new found wealth, but Freddy, I swear to God, if that bitch ever, ever get outta line, my hoochie momma ass gonna pull all that hoe’s weave out her head and scratch her face up so bad the only job she’ll ever get will be at the zoo, scaring the animals back in their cages.”

  “Sasha—“ Freddy tried to speak, but she interrupted.

  “What you need to be doin’ is gettin’ that bitch back on the phone and ask her for another five grand ‘cuz my baby needs Pampers.” With that, she sat down and crossed her arms across her chest, cutting her eyes at him.

  As much as he wanted to, Freddy couldn’t ignore her accusing stare. “Baby, I swear to God, that’s my aunt! You gotta believe me.”

  The corners of her mouth creased with contempt. “Your pants and shirt are on the dresser. I ironed them this morning.” Then she dropped a bombshell. “Today is the 30th. I know you and your friends plan on taking off in that car, so you can do one of your famous disappearing acts. I advise you not to try it just as I’m advising you not to try me with that bitch!” Tactfully, she changed the subject. It’s time for your medication again,” she said, not daring to look him in the eyes.

  “Shiiit!” - “You won’t ever trick me like that again. Paralyze me and then dress me up in little drawers.” In the back of his mind, her talk of his leaving disturbed him. With feigned robustness, he dropped to the floor and tried to do some pushups. He couldn’t even do one, though Sasha admired his rear end as it poked up in his failed attempt. He flopped on the floor exhausted. He looked up to find Sasha watching him and wondered what was on her mind. “These little ass drawers hurt my nuts.”