In This Life

by Leo Sullivan

  “Stop lyin’,” Freddy said in disbelief.

  “Man, I ain’t lyin’, and check this shit out… Coach Dan talked to the judge with the lawyer, and the judge agreed to drop all the charges… We sorta got the feeling they want you real bad…”

  “Yeah, I know…” Suddenly Freddy didn’t feel much like talking on the phone. “Where y’all at?” he asked, feeling a bit homesick for his pals.

  “We’re chillin’ at the old girl’s crib, burnin’ a fat one. I’m grounded, at least ‘til school starts back… Damn, Fred, what we gonna do?”

  Freddy sighed, his mind riddled with questions but no answers. He ran his fingers through his nappy hair in frustration. “I’ma lay low here. Man, this shit got my head all fucked up.”

  Mykle could hear the desperation in Freddy’s voice, even over the stereo that Dee had blasting at full volume. “Yo, Fred,” he said, “I been doin’ some thinkin’. Those papers you showed me, the one with the land deeds and your family’s name on them… What if there’s some connection to confirm what you had been thinking all along, Mykle continued. “My mother once tol’ me that back in the day, your daddy use to act real cheap, drivin’ that old beat up Ford pickup and wearin’ them old clothes… Fred, that big ole house y’all lived in probably belongs to you now--” The phone was silent for an eternity. “Freddy, you still there?”

  “Yeah.” Freddy’s mind flashed back to that big old house with the wooden floors and the high ceilings, the only home he had ever known. His daddy told him that his great-great grandfather had built that house with his very own hands for some white folks. Now the house was boarded up as if it concealed some evil past… In Freddy’s mind it did. “Utomo,” he said suddenly.

  “What?” Mykjle asked, incredulously.

  “The doctor…he knows everything. He can help me. The old cat is a little strange, but he saved my life twice. He’s one of them African dudes.” Freddy’s voice vibrated with new found hope. “Yeah, Utomo!”

  “Freddy?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Man, somethin’ ain’t right… Back there at the police station I kinda got the feelin’ that it was something else they were really searchin’ for… You know how adults be thinkin’ we ain’t all that bright ‘cause we young and stuff… Anyway, this one cop kept askin’ me if I ever seen you with any jewelry.”

  In consternation, he wondered, why the cops would be interested in jewelry when they were supposed to be looking for Freddy for Dirty Red’s murder. Dee took the phone from Mykle and told Freddy about his release and his big chance to go to college and maybe even get drafted into the pros. All three of them talked for a while more, but when Freddy hung up, he felt even more disturbed. He needed to talk to Dr. Utomo.

  “Who was that?” Sasha asked, rolling over on her side, her voice groggy with sleep.

  “Mykle and Dee. The police let’em go.” She yawned and slid her hand inside his boxers, caressing his backside. “Dee is being recruited by every major college in the country, and the pro scouts are already lookin’ at him too.”

  “You don’t sound too happy for him,” Sasha said, sensing his distress.

  “Oh, I am… That’s my boy.” Freddy turned to face her, but she had fallen back asleep as quickly as she had awakened.

  “Sasha… Sasha!” shaking her lightly.

  “Whaaat?” she snapped, removing her hand from his boxers and turning over on her back.

  It was then that he noticed the slight swell of her belly in the slanting morning rays. Her belly seemed gigantic to him and her blouse seemed too small. He watched her scratch her belly contentedly as a stream of saliva dribbled slowly from the corner of her pouting lips. There were dark circles under her eyes from not nearly enough sleep. Looking at her closely, he suddenly realized how very frail she really was. The visit to the asylum must have really taken its toll on her.

  Abruptly, her eyes popped open, matching his stare. “Freddy, baby… I’m tired,” she purred like a kitten, yawning and scratching a breast, snuggling next to him.

  As he watched her sleep, her breathing became stertorous. It was the first time in his life that he had ever heard a woman snore… Well, she’d be eighteen in two weeks, and that was woman enough for him. To bring a human life into the world should qualify anyone for adulthood. And strangely, in sleep, she looked much older than she was. “Dear God,” he prayed, “Please tell me what I should do next…”

  After staring at her for what seemed like forever, his mind lost its train of thought. Gently, he got up from the bed, walked over, turned on the television. The news was just coming on. The top of the screen read, “Live From the Senate Building in Washington, D.C.” A face leaped out at him. The chalk white features with paper-thin lips and big, water head. Freddy recognized him instantly. It was that rich freaky guy from the mansion he met with Marilyn Fox. “Holy shit!” Freddy exclaimed.

  Sasha stirred in her sleep. The face on the screen stared back at him with the same beady eyes. The man’s words were unintelligible. Freddy could barely comprehend him, but he did understand the man was saying something about running for the presidency of the United States of America. Freddy’s eyes nearly bulged from his head, and his heart raced when he heard that. The man’s words were no more than meaningless drone as he stared, stunned by the austere oval face. The news reporter referred to the man as “Senator Bob Williams.” Silently, Freddy repeated the name.

  The Illinois and California primaries were less than a month away. To everyone’s surprise, the Senator was throwing his hat in the ring, and though he was already late, he had somehow managed to cull endorsements from thirty-seven members of Congress.

  His campaign had already spent over two-million dollars on advertisements that were scheduled to be aired at prime time that night. Senator Williams and his staff had prepared a well planned and malicious attack on the President: in the ad, a caricature of the President was addressing the public, but each time he spoke, an announcer would cut in explaining how the President was lying.

  Freddy watched the screen intently. The Senator was surrounded by security personnel, and from the way they spoke into radios, looking around suspiciously, one would get the impression that Bob Williams was already the President of the United States. It dawned on Freddy just how serious this thing was. He decided right then that he needed to find Marilyn; only she held the real answers, the keys to unlock the closed doors to the daunting mysteries that confronted him.

  A commercial came on and Freddy found himself still staring at the television with a blank expression. Unconsciously, his fingers traced the ugly scar on his chest. This was becoming a habit. He reached for the telephone, dialing 411 for information. After the operator gave him the number, he dialed Providence Hospital in search of Dr. Utomo. To his dismay, the doctor was not in. Freddy left an urgent message for the doctor to call him as soon as possible.

  The clock on the vanity read 11:42 a.m., but Sasha was still asleep. For the past month or so, this was becoming a habit. With the anxiety of youth, Freddy felt like he had been waiting all his life as he waited for the call from the doctor.

  Finally, Sasha awoke. She looked at the clock, befuddle-- 2:13 p.m. She padded to the bathroom and took a shower. When she returned, the fragrance of something sweet permeated the air. With her body nude except for the towels she wore on her head and waist, she sat on the bed with her legs folded beneath her. Freddy watched and his young mind, as always, took notice of the gender difference, the feminine traits.

  Poised, Sasha took a deep breath and smiled at him as if she knew just what he was thinking. Her pulpy thighs were positioned slightly apart, giving him an eye full. She reached for the phone and dialed a number, her face in a scowl of deep contemplation as she bit down on her lower lip. “Hi Daddy.”

  On the other side of the room, Freddy bolted straight up from his sitting position as he watched her talk to the only man in this world who she loved more than him--her father.

  Before his
very eyes she transformed, drawling in a little girl’s voice. A somber nod of her head and then a lie, she looked directly at him as she spoke, her stare somehow holding him accountable for her lie. “Daddy, I’m going to stay at Sharon’s until school starts back in the fall…” The next few words were spoken in response to what Freddy could tell was a very heated argument. “…Daddy, it’s no military secret, you know how she feels about me… I’ll be eighteen soon… I love you Daddy.”

  Sasha abruptly hung up the phone. Freddy turned his head looking the other way. “He knows I’m lying,” she said out loud the way people do when they’re talking to themselves. “My stepmother doesn’t want me there in my own mother’s home. Ain’t that a trip!” Sasha grabbed some lotion, applying it to her legs. As Freddy watched her in semi-nudity, she looked up at him with the look of a woman who knows she’s being ogled by a man, but doesn’t mind.

  “What did your dad finally say?” Freddy asked, feeling uncomfortable in doing so.

  “He wants me to come home.”

  “Are you?”

  There was a pregnant pause with a fleeting look of worry.

  “Do you want me to?” She pours guilt all over him.

  “No.” For some reason, this embarrasses him.

  She perked up. “Freddy, I’ll never leave you… Never!” She wore that look on her face she had when they were trapped in the hospital elevator and she had molested his face with her tender kisses. “…I’ll never leave you, at least not in this lifetime…Hey! In this life…” she repeated, like a song. She scrambled from the bed to retrieve her bookbag and took out a pen and pad. Her pretty face twisted to the side with purposeful intent.

  “What are you doing?” Freddy asked.

  “I’m writing you a poem.” She made face at him that said, “Don’t bug me.”

  ******

  The days turned into weeks and Freddy was going mad with the unending solitude of living in a reclusive foreign environment with a pregnant woman who seemed to be getting bigger by the day. Sasha never seemed to tire of eating and talking on the phone. Freddy felt like a caged bird. If it hadn’t been for their occasional trek to see a movie or one of Sasha’s lavish spending sprees at one of the malls, he felt he would have lost his damn mind.

  Sasha could spend money like it was going out of style. She bought Gucci and Vichy outfits and purses and anything else that she wanted. She dressed in elegant maternal attire with matching accessories, always attracting attention. One look at her and one could easily see she was a fashion statement just waiting to start a trend. She wore a two-piece gold mini skirt that made other pregnant women blush. She also made arrangements with her school to finish her senior year at home. The high school principal took one look at Sasha in her gold mini skirt and volleyball belly before he granted her special circumstances.

  The days continued to drag and Freddy was on pins and needles. He still hadn’t heard from the doctor or Marilyn. Sasha was driving him up the wall. All she did was lie in bed like a beached whale, watch soap operas, and eat, eat, eat.

  One morning, Sasha lay in bed munching on a large bag of Oreo cookies. “Black women cry in the night, their souls like wings--”

  “Sasha! What the hell are you doing, trying to drive me crazy?” Freddy asked from the opposite side of the bed with the covers pulled over his head.

  “For your information,” she huffed, “I was reading from last year’s high school yearbook, where your friend Michael Bastin wrote a poem--”

  “Freddy snatched the covers off as if the bed was on fire. “My friend!” he hollered lividly. “You know damn well I can’t stand the sight of his braggin’ ass… Besides, he had a crush on you.”

  “Sasha hid her face behind the book and smiled to herself. At least he was awake now. She continued to prod his jealousy. “He was voted most likely to be a very successful writer.”

  Freddy sat up, fuming. “That nigga ain’t gonna be shit, but a good bean-pie-sellin’ muthafucka.” He laughed at his own joke.

  With malice aforethought, Sasha used her big toe with its nearly two-inch talon, raking it down the side of his butt as she got out of bed. To her vixenish delight, Freddy howled like a wounded polecat. Sasha ran to the bathroom, laughing all the way.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Flight 1247 from Los Angeles to Chicago landed at O’Hare International as scheduled. As Marilyn Fox exited the plane, she squinted her eyes, making a face as she held her hand over her face, shielding her eyes from the blazing sun. Dressed in chic black leather skirt with a lace decollette blouse and high heels, she briskly strutted, reaching into her purse to retrieve her dark sunglasses.

  At the luggage carousel, she tried to be inconspicuous in the long line. Even so, several people began to leer at her. “Shit!” she mumbled under her breath, placing a hand over her mouth. Chicago was her town, yet the threat of celebrity lurked like an invasion of privacy waiting to happen.

  Her name was called, she stiffened her back, bracing herself. Some bold motherfucker was pulling on her skirt. Fist clenched in anger, she spun around ready to knock someone the hell out. At first, she didn’t see anyone, until she looked down. There stood the cutest, adorable little girl she’d ever seen wearing pink barrettes in her hair. She was about four years old. In her tiny hand she held a pen and paper.

  “My mommy and daddy ask… I mean…can you… I mean, can I…” The little girl twisted and mixed up her limited words so badly that Marilyn couldn’t help but smile. She made a face at the parents who had sent the little girl to do their task. The child was still trying to put her words together when Marilyn reached down and signed her autograph and pecked the girl on her cheek. She took off trotting as fast as she could. Behind her she could hear other autograph seekers calling after her. She would have someone retrieve her luggage for her later.

  Outside, she quickly flagged down a cab. Once inside, she leaned back in the seat and removed a gold Rolex watch from her purse. She went over her plans once more, but this time she reminded herself not to underestimate him, even though his youth made it easy for her to do so. She just hoped that the time away from him, with no communication, was a good strategy… she hoped it would soften him up. It just “had” to work.

  The cab finally arrived at her condominium. With alarm, she noticed that her car had been moved. She exited the cab. Inside the hallway, peeking out just in time to see Marilyn walking into the apartment, Ms. Crabtree did a double take.

  Marilyn removed her high heels as she entered the living room. Sniffing the air she detected an unusual scent, but her condo was immaculate, just as she had left it. For some reason, she thought that was odd, especially for a sixteen-year old boy and his friends. Then it dawned on her as she walked in stocking feet across the carpet--suppose he was gone? She felt her heart skip a beat as she opened the bedroom door…

  There he lay atop her silk sheets on his stomach. The covers partially concealed his bronze sculptured body. Damn he was fine, she though to herself as she looked at his hairy thighs and the symmetry of his butt. Slowly, she removed all her clothes, enjoying the memories of his unbridled passion. She touched herself and a shiver ran up into her stomach. As she eased under the covers, she ran her fingernails across his taut butt and her hand then found refuge in his boxers, palming and caressing his ass.

  “Stop playin’ so damn much girl,” he said as he rolled onto his back.

  Marilyn pounced on top, straddling him. “Surprise, thug!” she vamped seductively, her hands and mouth everywhere. He could feel the moist heat from her body as she ground her torso against him. Erect nipples blinded his vision as her breasts pressed against his face.

  “Marilyn?” he asked in disbelief as she raised up, mounting him equestrian style. Deftly, a hand grabbed his penis with authority and stroked in into rigid tumescence.

  Sasha entered the room with a towel wrapped around her body. Startled, she shrieked, “Freddy!”

  He shoved Marilyn off of him with so much fo
rce that it looked like she had been shot from a cannon.

  “Bitch, I’m gonna kill your sorry ass,” Sasha yelled, coming directly for Marilyn.

  Freddy leaped from the bed with a fully erect penis, grabbing Sasha just in a nick of time. She kicked, scratched, clawed and wrestled with Freddy like a man. Even after the convalescence, with most of his strength returned, it took everything he had to hold her.

  Marilyn whimpered, and crawled naked on her hands and knees into a closet. Sasha continued to fight Freddy. Marilyn reappeared in blue jeans and a gray Mickey Mouse sweatshirt. Visibly shaken, she cried hysterically, body trembling, hands fidgeting at her face as if to thwart some invisible assault, eyes darting between Sasha and the door. She was totally out of her normal element. Marilyn Fox had never had a fight in her entire life.

  “I knew it! I knew it! Bitch, I knew your red ass was fuckin’ my man,” Sasha screamed, still trying to get at Marilyn.

  Marilyn cringed as she looked at Freddy with eyes pleading for help.

  “Freddy, boy, let …me…go!” Sasha screamed, her attention now on him. Finally, she stopped struggling, a trickle of sweat running down the bridge of her nose as she breathed heavily, panting, her energy spent.

  Worried about the baby, Freddy hesitantly released her, standing ready at her side. Sasha stepped away from him, trying to regain her composure, but still breathing heavily. Pointing an accusing finger at Marilyn, she said, “Bitch! I knew it! I knew it!” She stomped her foot angrily as tears streaked down her face. She reared back with all her might, and catching Freddy off guard, she slapped the shit out of him. Causing him to stumble. With his vision blurred and seeing stars, he grabbed hold of her like a prizefighter that had just been clobbered and was desperately holding on for the bell.

  “I’m pregnant and y’all tryin’ to play me like a fool, huh? Freddy, let me the fuck go, boy!” she screamed.

  Freddy heard ringing in his ears as he saw two of her.