Loving Selene [The Clay Parish Boys 1] (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour)

by Layle Black

  “Leave him be for a moment, Selene. He was worried sick about you, we both were. Now that we finally have you back here, you’re coming off pretty pissed off. I can appreciate you’re not happy we didn’t say anything to you about Gaston but darlin, we were kids and what little extra money he offered to look in on you was a gift from heaven for us back then. We hadn’t planned on caring the way we did. I know I sure as hell didn’t plan on it. When I left for the Marines there were times when just the thought of you kept me on my feet. The hope of seeing you again was reason enough to keep breathing.” Selene met Remy’s earnest gaze head on. A sheepish smile played across his lips, his humorless laugh echoing in the foyer. “You see, that’s the big curse of Clay, Selene. Once one of us falls in love, it’s either death or madness if that love isn’t returned how we need it. And you bet your sweet ass we need it. You changed everything about us, baby, and I don’t know whether to love you or resent it but I know one thing. I would go back and do it all again for the chance of loving you. I am pretty fucking sure Jac is right with me on that score.”

  Suddenly everything that Denny said didn’t matter. She took comfort in the undeniable truth that her parents loved each other and she was the product of that love. Selene recognized now that her desire to find her uncle was just an echo of that lonely little girl she used to be daydreaming on her aunt’s porch, hoping her father was a king searching for his long lost daughter. She wasn’t that little girl anymore and she’d found happiness with two men who had been there with her almost from the start. Selene reached up to clasp Remy’s head, her fingers sinking into the thick richness of his overlong hair.

  “Thank you for saying that.” She wanted to say more but his lips were on hers in seconds and then nothing more needed to be said. His lips slid across hers and breathed life into the smoldering embers that never quite burned out when it came to her two lovers. Selene found herself pressed against the door and his tall form flush against hers. His tongue did wicked things to her mouth that her had yearning for some of that attention to be lavished below her waist. After a few moments he relented so they could both take a needed breath.

  “Damn, girl. You make a man lose his mind.” Selene gasped in pleasure when he kissed down along the side of her neck, the bristle of his five o’clock shadow scraping lightly along the sensitive slope of her neck.

  “No more than you make a girl lose her mind.” A gentle nip on her neck had her moaning and pressing against him. Then she remembered Jac. Jac whom she owed an apology to. With a gentle push against the muscular wall of Remy’s chest he released her. He could have easily overpowered her with sheer strength alone but all it took was a light touch from her and he reluctantly stepped away.

  “I need to speak to Jac…to apologize.” Remy nodded, a knowing smile on his lips.

  “I think that would be a good idea but you need to know that he wanted this…wanted us so badly, sugar. He took a leap of faith that you could accept us both into your life. I think your comment was his worst fear.” Selene nodded and stepped away from the door to walk out of the foyer in the direction Jac went.

  Selene found him in his room sitting on the edge of his bed, what looked like a piece of paper in his hand. He was looking down intently at it, one of his fingers tracing across the surface of it.

  “Jac?” He looked up, his blue gaze the most somber she’d ever seen. Stepping into the room she moved to sit down next to him on the bed.

  “Jac, I am sorry I said what I said. I don’t know what Gaston’s intentions were concerning me but I know now that they have nothing to do with us. I am sorry I let Denny get to me and I am even sorrier I came back and took it out on you two.” Jac sat quietly listening, running his fingers over the paper in his hands.

  “You know…when I was growing up in Clay I was always so jealous of the happiness going on around me. Families, lovers…I wanted what they had because my childhood was so fucking empty. I lost my folks so young I barely remembered them. They did have a third though. His name was Donovan and he was like a second father to me but after my folks were killed he just…couldn’t handle it and left Clay on the first thing smoking. He couldn’t take being here and missing them, I guess. When he left, I ended up staying with Remy here in this old rambling place. His mother had died with my parents so things were not so great here either but it beat an orphanage in New Orleans. I think Remy and I were a little lost and lonely so we became close.” Jac sighed, finally setting the paper on the bed and Selene got her first look at it. It was an old photo of a pre-teen girl with pigtails wearing an old shirt and cut offs. It was her, she thought in surprise as she picked up the photo. The picture was heavily creased and faded in some spots but the image was surprisingly clear.

  The memories of her childhood were usually dark but there were beams of light that had made life easier and the picture seemed to capture one of those happy moments. In the picture she was standing by an old creek bed that she remembered going to often and her small hands were struggling to hold onto a catfish that was almost half her size. She was muddy, no doubt cold and smelling to high heaven but she was also happy. Why wouldn’t she be, Selene mused, she’d had a fun time fishing and in the company of her only two friends.

  “I forgot how much fun we had by that creek.” She mused aloud, her own fingers tracing along the Polaroid.

  “We sure did. I had more fun hanging out with you and Remy at that creek than I ever did raising hell in Sparks or New Orleans. With you and Remy…I felt complete and happy. As we got older I knew I wanted us all to have a life together like some of the families in Clay. So I decided that I would clean up my act because one day I wanted to be good enough for you…for us.” Jac’s voice remained even and calm but each of his words hit her with the force of a small explosion. The sincerity in his eyes took her breath away and all she could do was react. Her hand slid across the bed to lie lightly against his.

  “Jac, I…”

  “Baby girl, you don’t have to say anything. I just realized that maybe this all…us is not the best for you. When I found out you were coming home I just wanted us together again and as lovers but I think maybe I was a little caught in my own desires and dreams.” Selene wanted so badly to promise forever, to fulfill the desires of the lonely little boy he had been but the words just wouldn’t come. The sad smile on his face seemed to say he understood and that made her heart ache all the more. As with Remy she leaned in close to Jac, needed his breath across her lips and the heat of his kiss. Did this make her selfish? She suspected as much but she wanted to give as much as she was taking.

  Jac let her take the lead in the kiss, pleased at her initiative but his heart ached with the cold hard truth. He came to the realization that he was trying to create a life for them that just could not be. Not because he didn’t want it because he wanted it more than his next breath. Jac was almost certain Remy was of the same mind even if he hadn’t been at first but Jac suspected that had been more about fear. Now here they were at an impasse and their only decision would be to let her go. Jac slid his arms about her waist and pulled her in close, desperate to feel every rounded curve against him. There was no letting go right now. Tonight she was theirs and that would have to be enough. Jac knew that would never be enough. He was a man from Clay after all.

  Chapter 19

  Denny threw the empty bottle across the trailer and watched it shatter into thousands of pieces. The constant anxiety about where his next drink was going to come from began to set in. He barely had enough change in his pocket for a can of cheap beer from a gas station in town. Damn Selene! Coming back to Sparks and riling up his life. That girl had been a distraction from the moment she was born. Mignon had thought nothing about Denny when they had gotten married. Everything had always been about Selene. Bitterness sat like a bitter pill at the back of Denny’s throat and swallowing just made him want to gag.

  Denny stumbled to his old dresser and knocked over empty bottles and an ashtray looking for any extra
change. His fingers touched on an old framed picture and his desire to drink faded a little to the background when he beheld the picture. He and Mignon on their wedding day. The office of the Justice of the Peace was the sterile background but the smile on his face was broad and forgiving of anything, to include the cheap splendor of the environment they’d been in. Sure, he’d been happier than a pig in slop but his bride might as well have been asked to walk the plank.

  “She didn’t have to agree to marry me. She could have said no.” As he raved aloud the search for any liquor left in the mobile home became more and more frantic. Tables were overturned and more empty bottles thrown again the wall. The first bite of withdrawal began to gnaw at his gut and the need for something, anything to kill the pain became desperate. The only thing that matched that discomfort was the constant replay of memories in his mind. Of his Mignon. But she’d never really been his, had she? She’d been Emory’s and he’d just picked up the scraps left behind by another man. The story of his fucking life! Another bottle struck the wall with a shatter, splintered glass shooting in every direction. He didn’t hear the footsteps of another person entering the mobile home until the visitor spoke.

  “You never were one for housekeeping, Denny.” Denny spun around on unsteady legs to see Gaston Monero standing in the doorway, a large paper bag gripped in his hand. The man’s large well-dressed frame made the room seem so much smaller and shabbier. Then again Gaston had always had a way of doing that to Denny, making him feel small.

  “What the fuck do you want, Gaston? There ain’t nothin’ here for you.” Gaston laughed, running his free hand along his pant leg as if he had touched something unclean.

  “Now is that way to talk to your only friend?” Gaston dropped the bag on the floor with a careless toss. The clink of glass striking against glass made Denny’s heart kick into gear. His mouth filled with saliva and anticipation made his hands shake. He’d been drinking a long time and the sound of bottles set off an immediate reaction. In the few years he attended college he remembered reading about some scientist who managed to train a dog to salivate every time it heard a bell. That was him, salivating all over the fucking place at the sound of a glass bottle. He hated himself for it but he needed what was in that bag. What he hated even more was the knowing sneer on Gaston’s face and that alone made him tear his eyes away from the bag. Gaston merely laughed and paced over to the run down couch but stopped short as if changing his mind about sitting down on the dilapidated cushions.

  “No need to stand on ceremony, Denny. I brought that liquid kindness for you. I know you must be in between unemployment checks.” Denny held himself still, refusing to take the bait even though everything in him wanted to run to that bag. In his mind’s eye he could feel the cool bottle of liquor in his hand and the satisfying crack when he broke the seal of the bottle before upending the liquor down his throat. Sweat broke out across his body and he held absolutely still.

  “What the hell do you want, Gaston?” The sneer left Gaston’s face and a menacing mien took its place.

  “I know Selene was here today, Denny. Now what would she have to say to an old broke down drunk like you?” Denny shrugged, trying to appear bored by the conversation already.

  “Just came to say hello. I am still her stepfather, you know. Just chatting about old times.” Gaston laughed, the barking sound harsh and ugly.

  “Stepfather? You didn’t do a damn thing for her that was worth any good. You happened to mentioned to her that I am the one that kept her in food and clothes and you in drink all those years? If the courts would have allowed it, I would have taken the girl and raised her after her mother died.” It was Denny’s turn to laugh.

  “As if any court in the land would have let you have her,” he said derisively. “The girl was better off with me. At least I never looked at her any other way but a little girl. You think I didn’t know you like to come by here at night and watch her. The only reason you sent those boys around was because you couldn’t get close to her yourself. “ Something ugly moved behind Gaston’s eyes that had Denny stepping back away from the other man. For moment the air was pregnant with violent tension but then Gaston suddenly smiled in a bright affable way and shrugged. The sudden switch was like turning a light switch on and off. Downright spooky, Denny thought, a shiver edged along his spine.

  “Selene is the image of her mother. Such a beautiful little girl. I did my best to look out for her.”

  “You had nothing to do with looking out for her. You sent those swamp rat boys to sniff around her. Now she’s practically living with them. Looks like the old ‘Clay curse’ has struck again.” Denny enjoyed the feeling of having the upper hand. If only for a few minutes. He rarely felt in control around Gaston and the look of anger on the other man’s face was worth the risk of an ass kicking.

  “We’ll see about that. She won’t be too keen when I tell her I paid those Cajun brats to look after her. When she sees that I practically took care of her…she’ll feel differently.” The smug smile on Gaston’s face made Denny’s stomach turn because in so many ways the man was right. Denny had not had much interest in anything when his wife died, to include Selene. The old familiar bite of guilt joined the roiling mass of desperation at the pit of his stomach.

  “She already knows you sent Jac and Remy over here. I told her everything, Monero, so there aren’t any surprises for her.”

  The satisfaction of seeing the other man’s face become florid with temper and the smug smile slipping from his face was short lived. Monero moved faster than Denny thought a man his size could move. In seconds the air rushed from his lungs when he found himself slammed against the wall and Gaston’s fists gripping the threadbare collar of Denny’s shirt. The whole mobile home rocked with the violence of the impact.

  “You know something, Denny. I’ve done more for that girl than you ever thought to do for her since the day she was born. If Mignon had been thinking clearly she would have married me instead of Emory. That boy had nothing going for him but looks. I could have taken care of her like she deserved. When she married you I could have strangled her but I let it lie. I thought she would figure out her mistake when the underachieving bastard she married would let her down. Then she died…again choosing something else over me.” Denny felt his airway beginning to restrict under the pressure of Gaston’s hands but he refused to drop his gaze from the other man’s eyes. It was a paltry battle of wills but Denny wasn’t going to lose …just this once.

  With a disgusted sigh Gaston released Denny and let him slide to the ground. The urge to spit on the man was almost irresistible but he moved away from Denny instead to pace across the small space. He snorted in disgust as he looked around the shabby squalor of the room. He swallowed pure bile when he thought of the three storied Victorian he owned equipped with every luxury a person could ask for. In his foolhardy confidence in gaining Mignon for himself when his brother died Gaston bulldozed his parents’ old wreck of a house and had the new one built. Correction, he thought derisively, half-brother. Emory had a different mother that died giving birth to him. The woman had been his father’s mistress and Gaston’s mother, being the spineless woman she was, took the bastard in and raised him as her own. Gaston had disliked Emory on sight. The mewling little scrap of humanity had taken up what little attention Gaston ever got from his own parents.

  Through the years Emory became the golden child, the favored son. He would have gotten the family business if the kid had not decided to join the Marine Corps instead. Even then Gaston had never really wanted anything from his brother besides just getting the man out of town and on his way. That all changed the moment Gaston met Mignon. Beauty personified in a yellow sundress and a shy smile as sweet as spring. He’d been hard-pressed to hide the swell in his pants when they first met. He would have asked her out immediately but Emory with all his charm and appeal landed her first.

  The entire summer Gaston gritted his teeth watching the girl he wanted being seduced by his br
other. The only ray of light had been a mulberry wine induced frolic by the river on a warm summer night. Mignon had been curious about what made Clay so “different” from other Parishes, so with Emory’s consent they showed her. Gaston never had the pleasure of truly making love to Mignon but he’d tasted enough to plant a seed of obsession that would haunt him for years. Gaston closed his eyes and the memory was there that quickly, that vividly. The flavor of her on his lips had been a defining moment for him. He would do anything…anything to have her. All his efforts would go for naught and now here he stood standing over the drunk who had been responsible for the last part of Mignon to walk the earth. Such a waste.

  “We’ll see how she feels once I speak with her.” Denny grunted as he got to his feet with a stumble.

  “There’s no call for you to talk with her, Modero. Just leave her be! She’s going to leaving here anyway.” Gaston merely smiled as he turned and stalked back to the door.

  “We’ll see about that, Denny.” Just before Gaston stepped through the door he gave the bag of bottles on the floor a negligent wave.

  “Have a drink on me, Denny. You look a mite thirsty.” The screen door slammed when he left, leaving Denny standing there in the dim quiet.

  Denny waited for Gaston to climb into his truck and even waited for the engine to gun before the truck pulled away down the road. Then on shaky legs he walked over to the bag and pulled out a bottle of wine. It was the cheap stuff but it would do the job. His fingers shook as he tore at the lid. The delicious crack and it was open. Denny slowly sat on the couch and raised the bottle to his lips. The lip of the opening fell just short of his mouth. For a moment it hung there before the bottle went flying across the wall, shattering glass and crimson liquid.

  * * * *

  “So what does one wear to a Fais do do? “ Selene stood over her open suitcase contemplating the fast diminishing selection of clothing options. Dressed in only a black bra and lace panties, which had been her mode of dress all morning. The few pairs of underwear she had, she mused. Her panties had been disappearing of late and when she asked Jac and Remy about it, they’d both merely smiled in that “did I do that?” way. She supposed it made sense. Between the both of them panties became overrated and a waste of time.