Make Me Believe

by Karen Ferry

  I lose the tight grip on my balls and sink down to my knees, reaching my arms forward to grab her hips, and I pull hard, making her slide down the bed. Immediately, she places her legs on either side of my head, and I move my hands from her hips to place them on her arse, digging my nails in.

  I look down at her glistening pussy and lick my lips. I’m like a hungry man in the desert, about to die of thirst, and she’s the only one who’s able to quench it.

  Moving my head, I start to kiss, lick, and bite my way down her left inner thigh, my eyes locked on hers. It thrills be beyond measure when they never waver from mine. I repeat my devotion to her body on her right leg, chuckling huskily as she groans, raising her hips up, and silently asking me to go down on her.

  “Getting impatient?” I mumble, voice teasing, and continue to take my sweet time, her arousal teasing my nostrils. In one way, I’m just as impatient as she is, of course . . . but I still want to savour her, draw it out a bit longer.

  “Very,” she pants and narrows her eyes at me. “If you don’t hurry up, I’m going to get myself off.” That grabs my full attention, and I look sternly at her.

  “Grab the pillow behind you and don’t let go,” I tell her. She widens her eyes but again allows me to take control. “Good,” I praise her when I have her right where I want her. I lean down and inhale her scent, close my eyes, and her thighs quiver around me. She’s ready for me. I open my eyes again, and she gasps, no doubt seeing the need I have for her, and without breaking eye contact, I lick my lips before my mouth closes on her clit.

  “Holy fuck!” she groans above me when I begin to lick her out from her clit, down, down, down to the puckered hole behind her . . . As always, pleasing her in this way makes me even harder for her.

  I spread her arse cheeks more, letting her become completely exposed to me, and I can feel the tension in her thighs as she tightens them further. Her pussy is so wet for me, it’s almost unreal . . . I’ll never get enough of it.

  I come up for air and put a finger inside her slick heat.

  “My god, Emma, your pussy tastes better and better each fucking time . . . ”

  Writhing on the bed, gripping the pillow underneath her head so tightly that her knuckles have turned white, she chuckles throatily. “I love your mouth on me, Daniel. I need more . . . please . . . “

  Spreading my finger gently inside her tightness, I reply, “My pleasure, darling . . . ” and bend down my head again. As I suck harder on her clit, I remove my finger only to run it down her slit until it rests lightly on her anus. We’ve done this a few times already, but this time it feels different . . . It means more. I rub her hole easily, smearing it with her essence, and take my time letting her become used to it. As I lick her pussy, I push my finger slowly inside her hole, and when she moans my name in ecstasy, I can feel the pre-come leaking from my cock head.

  Fuck . . . maybe I won’t be able to make it last as long as I’d hoped.

  Emma’s whimpers become louder and louder as my finger picks up speed, pumping it in and out, and I can feel how close she is. Her excitement only spurs me on, and I lick and bite her clit harder than I’ve done before.

  “Oh, god, Daniel! I’m going to . . . I’m . . . “ she moans, her walls clamping down on my finger.

  “Come, baby,” I growl against her clit. “Come for me now . . . “

  She screams, sobbing on my name, her hips moving frantically as she rides my face and finger, and watching her like this, horny as hell, letting go for me entirely . . . It’s magnificent.

  The minute her limp legs fall to my side, utterly spent, I release her clit and her hole gently from my grasp and lean over her to kiss my way up her body. She hums, and I can see a small, happy smile on her lips.

  As I slip my tongue inside her belly button, I murmur, “If you fall asleep now, I think my cock will cry . . . “

  I look up when I hear her happy laugh and watch her eyes open.

  “Don’t worry, I’m far from done with you yet, honey,” she says, and I can see the truth in her gaze: filled with love for me, yes, but the heat remains as well.

  “Thank fuck,” I groan and close my mouth over her right tit. I can see and feel her chest heaving as I suck her nipple hard, grazing my teeth over it.

  “Oh . . . Daniel . . . What are you doing to me?” she breathes out when I lie down on top of her, covering her body completely, my throbbing cock resting on her stomach.

  I release her nipple with a loud pop and place my legs on either side of her, straddling her.

  “Loving you,” I reply quietly as I stare at her. The tenderness that greets me makes me catch my breath, and when she raises her head to place a lingering kiss on my lips, her arms around my neck, and the last thread of control snaps entirely.

  Wrenching my mouth free, I sit up, grab the base of my cock and stroke it up and down a few times.

  “Sweetheart, I won’t last for much longer . . . ” I pant and grab her legs roughly to put them around my back and lock them in place. Her feet dig into my arse, pulling me closer. I look down as her fingers begin to rub her clit, and it only causes more pre-come to leak from the tip of my cock.

  “I’m on the Pill, Daniel,” Emma says, catching my attention. “I’m ready when you are,” she teases me, but she can’t disguise how hot she is for me again.

  I smile wickedly. “Well then . . . ”

  Looking down again, I swirl my cock head around her clit, something that always drives her wild, and when her head falls back and she bites her lips, moaning loudly, I push inside her slowly. My head falls back in abandon when I feel her wetness surround me for the first time . . . the pleasure is overwhelming. Her heat is scorching in the most unfathomable way . . . My legs shake so hard and I need to move . . . I slam my cock inside her, and she groans, pushing her hips further against me.

  “Holy shit, Em . . . You feel amazing . . . ,” I pant, and turn my gaze to look at where we’re joined. Emma’s fingers continue to play with her pussy, her other hand pulling at her nipple, and my speed picks up, growing wilder with each thrust.

  “Fuck, so do you, Daniel,” she moans. “I love feeling your cock inside me.”

  “Oh my god, Emma . . . What are you doing to me?” I repeat her words from before and stare into her eyes. The same burn coursing through me right now is reflected back at me, and I need to feel her lips again.

  I lean down swiftly and take a firm hold on her chin. “Mouth,” I demand, and when our tongues meet again, I mimic the movements of my cock, letting her know in no uncertain terms how hot she makes me feel.

  I end the kiss by licking the seam of her lips and place my mouth beside her ear. “I love you so fucking much, sweetheart.”

  As the words fall from my mouth, she cries out, and the tingling in my spine intensifies. I thrust one last time and still, spilling my load inside her. Dropping my weight on her, the tremors run through me, and I slide back and forth slowly as my cock gradually becomes slack.

  She caresses my neck with open-mouthed kisses, tightening her arms around me, and I hum, sated.

  “Thank you,” I whisper and suck gently on her earlobe.

  “Anytime, Preppy,” she whispers, and I chuckle. Afraid I’ll crush her with my weight, I lean to my side to allow her to catch her breath properly again.

  I smile at her, perusing her face until my eyes rest on hers again. When I see the tears falling, my smile is wiped off immediately.

  “Why are you crying?” I ask her, alarmed, my fingers wiping them away as fast as possible.

  She sniffles. “Because I never knew it could feel like this . . . ”

  “It?” I ask her, confused.

  She nods. “Sex. Hanky-panky. Fooling around. You know . . . ” Sniffling, her lips pull up in a small grin.

  No longer fearing that she’ll run away from me, I kiss the tip of her nose while I press my stirring cock inside her again.

  “That’s because this is not sex, sweetheart,” I tell her and le
an down so that my lips hover above hers. She stills completely, her captivating blue eyes taking me prisoner. “This is love,” I continue. “I may not be an expert, but the way you just made me feel? As if I am the king of the world just for making you let go like that, opening yourself up for me completely?” She nods, a small smile forming on her lips. “Well . . . That says everything. And I’m not ever letting you go, Emma, you hear me?”

  She closes the distance between us and kisses me, her breath and tongue caressing mine briefly before she falls back on the pillow again.

  Smiling wickedly at me, she waggles her eyebrows at me. “Ready for round two?”

  I grin.

  “Oh, yeah, baby,” I reply, and I roll to my back, taking her with me without losing the connection between us.

  Placing her elbows on each side of my head, she threads her fingers through my hair and whispers, “But this time, I’m in charge . . . ”

  Fuck. Me.

  “Have at it, sweetheart,” I growl.

  Then she gets to work on my body, all the while I can see her love for me shine through her eyes.

  Chapter 38

  I fall back in bed, my heart hammering wildly, and panting I say, “You’re going to break my vagina!”

  Daniel chuckles, as breathless as I am, and slides down beside me. Reaching an arm across my belly, he takes a firm hold and pulls me closer to his side.

  “It’s your fault, sweetheart . . . if your body wasn’t so irresistible, I’d have an easier time letting you rest.”

  I snort and slap his butt lightly. “Right, well, I’m far from perfect. My stomach’s too floppy, and my arse is too full.”

  “Hey, no knocking two of my favourite body parts,” he grins and snuggles closer to me.

  I shake my head fondly at him and put my duvet over my body. We lie in sated silence for a while, listening to the rain. The storm passed earlier, slowing it down, and it feels comforting to be here in our small cocoon, away from everyone and everything for a while.

  It’s just us.

  Telling Daniel I love him was at first such a frightening thought, but now that I’ve let those three little words out, I just want to shout them from the rooftops.

  And yet . . . My sleepiness disappears abruptly when I remember that I have yet to tell him my story. I’m still scared that he’ll see me differently, but it isn’t as all encompassing as before.

  I know I’m no longer weak.

  I can get through this.

  I sit up slowly and turn around to face him better. Placing my elbow on my pillow, I hold my head up while my other hand pulls slightly on the small smatter of hair on his chest.

  “Daniel . . .,” I start, a bit unsure about how to go about this.

  “Emma . . .,” he replies, voice serious, but I also hear slight amusement in his voice. I glance into his eyes but can’t hold them for long.

  Creasing my forehead, I try again. “There’s something I have to tell you, and . . . well, it won’t be pleasant.”

  He covers my hand on his chest with his, stilling my fingers. “You don’t have to, sweetheart . . . I can wait.”

  Maybe you can . . . but I’m sick of waiting for my life to begin.

  I kiss his chest quickly and smile sadly at him. Gone is the playfulness from earlier, leaving a concerned frown in his eyes instead.

  “But I want to,” I say quietly and take a deep breath before beginning my tale.

  “When I was ten, my parents took us kids on a week-long vacation to Brighton. My brother wanted his friend, Tom, to come with us, and his parents didn’t see anything wrong with it, so off we went. They rented a cottage that had a small, separate alcove attached to it where we children were meant to sleep. And my parents slept in the main house.”

  I lie down and Daniel turns to his side, facing me. He clenches his jaw, possibly sensing how bad my story is, and I swallow.

  “It was a beautiful place. We spent the first few days playing tourists, and I thought that it was fun having two older boys -- they were five years older than me -- watch over me. At first, I didn’t think anything of it when I’d catch Tom staring at me with a funny look in his eyes from time to time. But then...on the second night, he came into my room -- it wasn’t close to my brother’s -- and he’d...” I close my eyes to prevent the tears from falling.

  The nausea is back in full force.

  Will the thought of him always make me sick?

  “Sweetheart . . . ,” Daniel’s voice breaks through, and I open my eyes. He looks torn, anguished . . . furious. But instead of making me lose heart, I take courage when, apart from those things, I also see his love for me.

  “Please . . . I need to finish this . . . ,” I beg him, ignoring the tears.

  He grabs my hand in his, intertwining our fingers, and nods at me.

  “So . . . ,.” I breathe. “At first, I wasn’t completely awake, but when he turned me around on my stomach and pulled my knickers down, I tried to sit up to ask him why he was in my room, but . . . He put his hand over my mouth and hissed, ‘If you scream, I’ll kill you!’ before he gagged me with a cloth he pulled out of his swim shorts.” I swallow the nausea that threatens to take me over. “The look in his eyes . . . it was so empty, cold . . . vacant. As if he wasn’t really present. I started to cry when he straddled me from behind, but tried to keep my voice down because I truly believed his threat.”

  “Oh god, Emma,” Daniel murmurs through his own tears.

  I wipe a hand over my mouth and hurry to finish. “He kept my hands in such a fierce grip while he masturbated on top of me, all the while his harsh voice panted, and he kept licking my neck. He even tried to . . . to kiss me, forcing his probing tongue against my lips, making me gag. After he was done, he pushed a finger inside my vagina and . . . I swear, I tried to prevent him from doing that to me!”

  Openly crying now, I bury my head in my pillow, the old shame rearing its ugly head, but Daniel pulls me into his arms.

  “I kept pleading with him to stop, Daniel,” I sob in his arms all the while he rocks me gently from side to side. “But every night, he’d come into my room . . . he’d do the same all over again. Over and over . . . ”

  I can’t go on anymore, and Daniel lets me cry out my sorrow for the loss of my childhood.

  When I’m finally spent, I lean away from him and look into his eyes.

  “There’s a bit more,” I whisper, and his arms tighten around me.

  “Okay, go on . . . finish it,” he grits out and kisses my forehead.

  “You’re probably wondering why I didn’t confide in my parents, but you have to understand one thing: when you’re violated like that, you feel dirty . . . weak . . . and guilty. For the longest time, I thought that I was the reason for why he did what he did -- after all, he kept telling me it was my fault -- and I just felt so ashamed.”

  “But did you end up telling your parents about it? And your brother?”

  I nod. “Yes, but not until five years later. I was really good at keeping secrets, and I’d ignore him whenever he came to visit Steven and lock my room; or I’d leave the house the minute I saw him, but . . . I became more and more withdrawn, started hanging out with the wrong crowd . . . ” Sighing, I wipe the remnants of my tears away and look down at my lap. “I knew my parents were deeply concerned, and so was Nan, because the nightmares started soon after we came home from that trip. So I lied, of course. When my parents caught me coming home past my curfew one night, high as a kite, they fell apart. So . . . that’s when I told them . . . and Steven about Tom and about what happened that summer.”

  I fall silent for a while, remembering that day as clearly as if it happened yesterday.

  “What happened next, darling?” Daniel asks me quietly.

  “My mum started to cry, and my dad . . . I’ve never seen him so furious before. But Steven . . . he . . . ” I swallow past the lump in my throat. “He didn’t believe me at all.”

  “What?!” Daniel jumps, and I look tim
idly at him. “That bastard! You’re his sister, for god’s sake! How could he not believe you?” His eyes are burning with outrage for me, and his body is shaking.

  Drawing strength from his anger, I straighten my shoulders. “I don’t know . . . Neither do my parents. Steven was away at university and didn’t live at home at the time, and he just stormed out of the house that night, shouting that he’d come back when I admitted that I’d lied. I haven’t seen him often since then, actually. And . . . I’ve never really talked about it with my parents, either. I think . . . once I straightened myself out, stopped doing drugs, I think we all thought that talking it through that one time was enough. But . . . well, clearly, we were all wrong about that part. I do know that my mum and dad had a meeting with his parents shortly after, but I’ve never asked what was said between them.”

  Daniel hugs me tightly to his chest, and I wrap my arms around his neck, never wanting to let him go.

  “I’m so sorry, Em,” he murmurs, and I kiss his neck.

  He leans away from me and sighs. “So . . . what did you do? What happened to Tom? Did you report him?”

  I shake my head. In some way, this is almost the hardest admission for him to ask of me.

  “I couldn’t go through with it, Daniel . . . Seeing as we were both considered children at the time, I doubt much would have come of it, other than a slap on his wrist.”

  He frowns.

  “I know that I should have reported him to the police, honey,” I whisper. “But . . . I didn’t want to make a fuss. I felt that, what with the drugs and everything, I’d put my parents through enough already, and . . . I just wanted to forget altogether. Do you understand . . . ?”

  Please don’t let go of me now . . .

  A sigh of relief escapes me when he smiles gently at me. “I do,” he concedes. “But god, Em . . . how can you even want to have sex after all you went through? I mean, all we’ve done . . . ”

  I grab his face and stare hard into his eyes, willing him to see the truth there.

  “Don’t, honey . . . I know it’s probably completely fucked up, but I love sex . . . it’s thrilling, exciting, hell . . . it’s one of life’s greatest pleasures!” I smile before I kiss him deeply, my tongue twirling around his, trying to convey the true depth of my love and need for him with my lips. We’re both breathing hard when I end it.