I exhaled, exhausted. “He said he’s going to wait for me. I hope he gets tired and leaves.” I sounded terrified.
“He looked to me like he was making himself comfortable,” Lola said cheerfully. “Why do you sound so worried? Does he scare you?”
“I guess,” I admitted.
Lola pulled a lip stick, looked in the mirror and began retouching her make-up. “That only happens to me when there’s too much chemistry and things are moving too fast.”
I looked over at Lola. When she winked at me in the mirror, I found myself wondering how many guys she’d been with. She seemed to have so much experience.
“There’s white chemistry and black chemistry,” she said in an academic tone. “It’s just like . . . white magic and dark magic. The first one is perfectly safe. The other one, you need to stay away from, because it can turn you.” She made it sound as if black chemistry would transform you into a vampire or a werewolf.
“What do you mean?”
“If you crave a guy with wild lust, it can turn into an obsession. All physical and . . . savage.” Her eyes seemed far away, as if she were recalling a specific situation of her own. She snapped out of it. “But there’s nothing wrong with a little harmless lust, a hormone cocktail. That can be tons of fun, and if that’s what you’ve got with that piece of . . .” she sighed dramatically, “ . . . well, you shouldn’t miss the opportunity to have a little fun.”
“It’s not that easy,” I murmured, looking down at my Hello Kitty blow dryer.
“It is exactly that easy,” Lola assured me. “We’re the ones who complicate everything by thinking too much.” She tapped my temple, taking me out of my trance.
Boy, was she right about that!
***
When I walked out of the locker room an hour later, I tried to pretend I was glad that Sebastian was nowhere in sight. But as I exited the building and discovered him sitting on a bench reading the novel for our next English assignment, the joyous pounding of my heart made it impossible to keep lying to myself.
A warm breeze blew a lock of hair over my eyes as I walked past a waiting Sebastian. Leaves from the trees overhead moved against the evening sky. Sebastian stood and started walking at my side. His eyes traveled down the length of my body and paused shamelessly on my bare legs.
“Well worth the wait,” he said.
“Why are you still here?”
“To take you out on a date.” He examined my face. “I like lip gloss on you.”
Without thinking, I had applied pink gloss for Sebastian’s benefit. I swear, it was like I had split personality disorder.
“Why are you so hard-headed?” I asked. Clearly, my rational self was in charge of the situation at the moment.
“It’s a . . . quality of mine. It’s helped me get what I want many times,” Sebastian said. “And what I want right now is to get to know you. I mean . . .” He sucked in a breath through his teeth, letting his gaze explore my body again. I stood there feeling naked in my tank top and shorts, yet feeling more beautiful than ever before.
“We definitely have some amazing chemistry,” Sebastian said after his careful exploration. “I’m sure you’ve noticed. And that’s all well and good, but there’s more to a relationship than just physical attraction. Like I said, I want you whole. I want to know you.”
God, he was smooth talker.
He seemed to know all my qualms, and the exact words that might make them go away. But how could I trust him? I never could. I was broken inside. Yes, I wanted him, but those were my hormones talking. He was a gorgeous man, interested in me, and we did have some amazing chemistry between us. That was undeniable. I was a warm-blooded woman, for Pete’s sake, not a robot.
But even if he was being sincere—which of course I didn’t want to believe—he was wasting his time with me, because even knowing what a softy I was, even knowing that I might fall for him, I could never give him my heart openly. I had done that before, and been betrayed at so many levels that I was incapable of ever reaching that kind of trust again.
“Sebastian, I really appreciate your interest. I’m flattered. You are extremely . . . attractive—I won’t deny that—but I’m not looking for a relationship. I’ve told you this before.”
“You stubborn girl. I’m not taking no for an answer.”
Suddenly, Sebastian took my hand and started pulling me along the sidewalk.
“Let go of me,” I protested.
“Shh, be quiet, they’ll think I’m trying to kidnap you!”
“But you are!”
“Well, maybe I am, but think of how guilty you’ll feel if you land me in jail for attempted kidnapping.”
No one was around to call the cops and take him prisoner, so I kept fighting to get my wrist free.
With a huff of frustration, Sebastian turned around and scooped me into his arms like a small child. I squealed and wiggled, kicking my legs, but he was too strong for me. He walked me across the parking lot, then set me down next to his car. After pressing my back against the passenger door, he put his hands on either side of my body, caging me in.
“What are you making me do, girl?” he asked, shaking his head. He laughed. “This is so wrong.”
“Thank you for recognizing that.” I crossed my arms and tried to look as righteous as possible.
“I’ve just never wanted something so badly. Is it so hard? To give me what I want? I know I sound like a spoiled brat, but I just want to get to know you. Please come with me. I promise I’ll leave you alone after tonight. Just give me a chance. You are wrong about me. You think I’m a player, that I’m just looking for a hook-up, but that’s not true. Madison, please.” Sebastian leaned forward and brushed a tantalizing kiss on my lips, then he begged again.
My eyelashes fluttered open. They always betrayed me and closed automatically whenever he got too close. I wondered if this could be Lola’s black chemistry, and immediately came up with no for an answer. If it were, Sebastian would have just stuffed me into his car, and I would have probably liked it. Looking up at his pleading eyes, it all felt innocent enough.
“You really promise to stop all of this if I go with you now?” I asked.
He put a hand on his heart. “I promise.”
I nodded. “Okay. Let’s go on a date.”
Chapter 16
When Sebastian pulled his car up to the Social Science Tower, I stared at the building, confused.
“What are we doing here?” I asked.
“Just trust me.”
As we approached the front entrance of the empty-looking building, I felt uneasy. The last class had probably let out an hour ago. “I don’t think we’re supposed to be here.”
“It’s okay, don’t worry.”
He found the glass door locked when he tried to push it open, so he knocked. A blond guy poked his head out from one of the interior offices. I recognized him as one of the guys who had been eating with Sebastian in the food court one day. When he saw us, he walked to the door and pushed the handle down. Sebastian took my elbow and led me inside.
“’Bout time, dude,” the blond guy said.
“Thanks, Matt.” Sebastian bumped fists with him.
“No problem. I’m heading out. I’ve got a date, too. You kids have fun.” He pushed out the door in a hurry and was gone within seconds.
Sebastian pointed me toward the elevators. Once we were inside, he punched the button for the top floor.
The building was eerily quiet and desolate. I panicked at the thought of being completely alone with Sebastian. I had no doubt where that would end up. I had expected him to take me out for dinner or something, but I should have known better.
“I’m not . . . we’re not . . . I’m not having sex with you,” I blurted out.
Pressing me against the elevator wall, he ran a finger down my cheek. “I know,” he breathed on top of my lips. “We’re not ready for that. One day, but not tonight. Tonight, I have a million questions to ask you. I want to
know your favorite color and food, your middle name, what makes you so irresistible, and many other things.”
“Blue. Sushi. Riley. Bar soap,” I blurted out, trying to confuse him.
“Bar soap makes you irresistible?” Sebastian chuckled and considered for a moment, then nodded. “I’ve always liked pure simplicity.”
The elevator dinged. Sebastian pulled away reluctantly. I took a deep breath, trying to regain my wits. As we walked out into the hall, I felt a little proud of myself. My legs functioned properly, I had managed to resist the urge to kiss him, and I had made it clear we weren’t going there.
To my surprise, Sebastian pulled me toward the emergency exit, then up the flight of stairs that led to the rooftop. He swung the door open and ushered me into the embrace of the vast nighttime sky.
Looking around us, I slowly approached the edge of the roof and gazed down onto campus. I had never seen U.C.I. from such a vantage point, but the sight of it made me feel giddy inside. It wasn’t spectacular or anything, but it was beautiful. I could see the circumference of Aldrich Park and all the trees and lecture buildings that surrounded it. On the outer edges of campus, the student housing areas twinkled with light, making me think of all the students working on their homework or hanging out with their roommates.
“Great view, huh?” Sebastian said from behind me. I could sense his warm chest only inches from my back. He put a hand on my waist and came around to stand by my side.
“Yeah, I like it,” I said.
“I hope you like this, too.” Sebastian turned me around and showed me around the corner.
Underfoot laid a red and white picnic blanket. On top of it, there were two lanterns, glowing with warm light. Next to them, two pizza boxes and a few canned drinks.
A smile rose to my lips involuntarily.
“I hope you like pizza. There’s plain cheese and pepperoni.”
“I love pizza and I’m starving.” I really was. I hadn’t eaten anything since before noon.
We sat on top of the blanket across from each other. Sebastian produced disposable plates and napkins from a plastic bag and opened the pizza boxes.
“This is good pizza,” I said between bites.
“The best in town. I’m sure Matt would have eaten it all, if you hadn’t wisely decided to come with me.” He handed me a can of soda, then popped the top of a second one and took a few gulps.
Sebastian seemed to be just as hungry as I was, and we both devoured our first slices in silence. While savoring the fresh-baked dinner, I thought of the fact that he’d planned all of this before I even said yes. It made me a little mad to know that he’d been that self-confident about my acquiescence. Then I remembered he’d practically had to kidnap me to get me to come, and I didn’t feel so bad anymore.
“So here’s what I know about you, Madison,” Sebastian started. “You’re beautiful, smart, dedicated. You have a huge heart, a killer bod.” He sighed and shook his head. The brush of his gaze on my breasts made my nipples pebble in response.
I blushed and started to fidget with the tab on my soda can, swiveling it around in circles.
“You’d think that with all of that,” he continued, “I wouldn’t need to know more, but I want to learn everything there is to learn about Madison Riley Burch. I want to know you . . . inside and out.”
At that word, whispered with a double meaning that wasn’t lost on the most intimate parts of my body, the plate slid from my hand and plopped on the picnic blanket. Luckily, it fell right side up, and I managed to make the accident look intentional.
“Well, ask away, Sebastian,” I said impatiently. I kept messing with my soda’s tab until it popped free.
Ignoring my desire to hurry things along, Sebastian lay down on the blanket and looked up at the sky. He pillowed his head on his hands and relaxed.
“Lie down,” he said.
Considering the boxes of pizza, lanterns and soda cans strewn between us, I felt that lying down was a reasonably safe option. Feeling content with a full belly, I followed his lead.
“So you’re from Arizona?” Sebastian asked after a long moment.
“Yes, I grew up there. Never lived anywhere else, until I came here for school.”
“Do you have any siblings?”
“I don’t. How about you?”
“I’m an only child, too” he responded. “I have lots of cousins, though. So I never regretted not having a brother or sister. Don’t tell anybody, but Cristina’s my cousin.”
Surprised, I pushed up on one elbow and looked at Sebastian. “Really?” I stuck the soda’s tab in my mouth and held it between my lips.
“Mm-hmm. We never tell anybody we’re cousins because that way, we can run interference for each other when necessary.”
I nodded. “I see. The way she did that day when Jessica asked you to take her to The Bongo Room.”
“Exactly like that” He grinned.
I lay back down, wishing I had a male cousin or friend who could run interference for me. That would be extremely convenient.
“I need a cousin,” I said.
Sebastian laughed. “Well, I’m glad you don’t have one. Or do you?”
“Nah, my mom’s an only child and . . . I never knew my dad.” I don’t know what made me open up and say that. Maybe it was the contentment I felt under the blue-black sky, or the warm air on my skin, or the genuine interest behind Sebastian’s questions, but I felt as if there was nothing to hide. Even those things I always had difficulty sharing with anybody else.
Sebastian did not probe. Instead he told me about his dad. “That sucks. My father was a great influence in my life. I couldn’t imagine growing up without him.”
The comment could have easily been condescending, but it didn’t come across that way. I could tell he shared it not to make me feel bad because I had no dad, but because he wanted me to know his father had been a big part of his life. I figured his father was dead now. I wanted to ask him what had happened, but it felt too intimate. I was surprised when he shared much more than I would have dared ask.
“He passed away two years ago. A heart attack. He was thirteen years older than my mother, almost a different generation. He was Cuban. My mom’s American. They met in Havana, fell in love.” Sebastian startled me with a sudden laugh. “They were already old when they met, and, honestly, they could’ve both been my grandparents. It was embarrassing sometimes when Dad picked me up from school and the kids would ask if he was my Grandpa.”
But Sebastian didn’t sound embarrassed. He sounded fond and melancholic.
“He was the one who got me interested in magic, Latin music, and a ton of other things. He showed me the value of honesty and good manners. I miss him,” he said the last few words in low voice that was almost inaudible.
I turned my face his way and took the soda tab out of my mouth. “I’m sorry.”
Sebastian turned to look back at me. We stared into each other’s eyes until he asked, “Why are you afraid of letting me in? Did someone hurt you before?”
Breaking eye contact, I sat up and hugged my legs to my chest.
Rule No.8: Never share your secrets with a player. He will only use them to his advantage.
I don’t know why I clung to these rules. The more I learned about Sebastian, the less I believed he was capable of hurting me intentionally.
“I’d rather not talk about that,” I said.
Sebastian sat up, too, and criss-crossed his long legs. “I understand.”
He was silent for a moment. His eyes moved around as if he was thinking, trying to decide what to say next.
“You know, Jessica . . .” He stopped.
Jessica what?! I watched him intently, waiting for him to continue.
“Um, she told me a little about your G.A.P. club.”
I froze, bothered by the distinct feeling that initially he’d wanted to say something different, and also the fact that, instead, he’d brought up G.A.P. What did he know?
“
Uh . . .” I hesitated.
“Jessica said you meet every other Monday. What do you all talk about?”
Looking out of the corner of my eye, I tried to gauge Sebastian’s question. Did he already know the purpose of the club, and was he now simply trying to test me? Or was this just a curious question—another harmless topic of conversation?
“Just stuff,” I shrugged, suspecting Jessica had told him our regular lie, that G.A.P. stood for Girls Achieving Professionalism. Still, I didn’t want to start lying to Sebastian, not after he’d just finished telling me about learning honesty from his deceased father.
“It’s boring mostly,” I said, standing and walking toward the edge of the building. The few cars driving below looked like children’s toys. I searched for a different topic of conversation and stumbled onto a question I’d been wanting to ask.
“What are you majoring in?”
Sebastian came to stand next to me. “Theater.”
“It seems fitting,” I said, not being mean or condescending. He had the poise and gorgeous looks that could propel him all the way to Broadway or Hollywood. His flair for dance and magic repertoire made much more sense now, too.
“Pre-med seems fitting for you as well.” He angled his body away from the waist-high wall and faced me. “If I had to take a guess, I would say you’d like to be a pediatrician. Am I close?”
I wanted to turn and face him, too. Instead, I dug my fingers into the edge of the low brick barrier and doggedly stared straight ahead. Sebastian rested his forearm on the edge of the wall, his hand just a couple of inches from mine. I craved to touch him so badly.
“Yes, I’d love to be a pediatrician,” I said after a steadying breath.
“You’d make a great one. I have no doubt about that.”
When I didn’t turn his way, he looked away and sighed. We peered down at Aldrich Park under the nighttime sky for a long time without saying a word. I found myself feeling safe and at ease with him, enjoying our date more than I would have ever imagined.
The Guys Are Props Club Page 10