Rock Chick Revenge

by Ashley, Kristen

  “Sissy and I are going to talk to Vito Zano.”

  Silence.

  “Shirleen?”

  “Girl, why in the hell are you and Sissy goin’ to talk to Vito Zano?” Now she sounded kind of mad.

  “He’s Dom’s uncle. Sissy and I both know him. We’re going to ask him to help us out. He loves us. He’s Uncle Vito.”

  “Uncle Vito my ass. Are you crazy?” Now she sounded like she thought I was crazy.

  “Relax, Shirleen, I have it all figured out.”

  “Shee-it, girl. You’re cracked,” she took the phone away from her ear and I heard her talking to Daisy then I heard Daisy screech. “Is she crazy?”

  Jeez.

  Shirleen came back to me. “Tell me what chance I got of talkin’ you out of this fool idea.”

  “Zip,” I informed her.

  “Tell me where Sissy’s stayin’. We’ll meet you there.”

  “Shirleen, there’s no need.”

  “There’s a need, there’s so much of a need, I’m missin’ my Days of Our Lives ritual. Tell me the address.”

  “Shirleen –”

  “Tell me.” Now she sounded like she wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

  I told her.

  * * * * *

  Sissy, Shirleen, Daisy and I rolled up to Uncle Vito’s house in Englewood.

  He lived in what looked like your normal, average, everyday house in a normal, average, everyday neighborhood. It wasn’t until you got inside and saw the Picasso scribble framed on the wall and swam in his indoor pool off the back room that you found out he was loaded.

  We all trooped up to the house and knocked on the door. Uncle Vito’s wife, Aunt Angela, opened the door.

  “Sissy! Ava! What a wonderful surprise!” She cried and gave us big hugs.

  Uncle Vito was nearly bald, very round and about an inch taller than me. Aunt Angela was slim, trim, stylish and disappeared once a year to a “spa” where she came out looking five years younger. Her forehead never moved. Botox city.

  Still, she was sweet.

  “Aunt Angela, these are our friends Daisy and Shirleen,” Sissy introduced as we walked into the foyer and Angela greeted Daisy and Shirleen. She was such a premier hostess, she seemed not to have any reaction at all to Daisy and Shirleen. Not that there was any reaction to be had about them, except Daisy was wearing skintight faded jeans with silver rivets up the sides, pink platform boots and a baby blue v-necked shirt that showed so much cleavage, most mothers would cover their children’s eyes at the sight of her.

  Then again we found out quickly that Aunt Angela knew Daisy, they moved in the same social circles. They gave each other cheek kisses that came nowhere near the cheek.

  “Come in, come in. Can I get you coffee? I have some cannoli from Pasquini’s.”

  “That sounds good,” Shirleen said.

  I gave Shirleen a look and then turned back to Aunt Angela.

  “Sorry, Aunt Angela. We’re here to see Uncle Vito, it’s important.”

  She looked at me and said, “Vito’s just about to head out to a meeting.”

  No!

  My gaze swung to Sissy, screaming, mutely, do something!

  Sissy to the rescue. “We have to see him before he goes. It’s important,” Sissy told her then her voice lowered. “It’s about Dom.”

  Aunt Angela’s mouth got tight as she looked at Sissy. Angela also thought Dom was a dickhead.

  Angela made a decision and said, “Come through to the family room. I’ll get Vito.” She led us to the family room and then hot-footed it out.

  “I don’t see why we couldn’t have a cannoli and a coffee while we’re waitin’,” Shirleen groused.

  “We don’t have time,” I told her.

  “Have you ever had a cannoli from Pasquini’s? There’s always time for a cannoli from Pasquini’s.”

  In my fatty, fatty four-eyed days I’d practically lived at Pasquini’s. I’d had more cannolis, chocolate candles, napoleons and profiteroles at Pasquini’s than the entire population of Denver.

  I decided not to answer. Luckily, I didn’t have to, Uncle Vito walked in.

  He threw out his arms toward Sissy and me. “Sissy! Ava! Come give your Uncle Vito a hug.”

  Okay, so I was a little weirded out that Luke told me Uncle Vito had ordered hits where guys ended up with bullets in their brains. Not to mention he’d kidnapped me a couple of days earlier. Still, if Sissy and Dom divorced, I’d likely not be invited to the huge family Thanksgiving dinner again. This was probably one of the last times I’d ever see him. Anyway, if he was a man who could order a hit, it was probably not prudent to dis him on a hug. So, with Sissy, I moved forward for a big Uncle Vito hug.

  “How’re my girls?” he asked, leaning back and dropping his arms.

  “Not good, Uncle Vito,” Sissy answered.

  Vito’s eyes came directly to me.

  Eek!

  What’d I do?

  “What’s Dom done now?” he asked.

  Oh, okay, freak out cancelled. I was always telling on Dom to Uncle Vito. He knew I’d give him the truth.

  Sissy and I looked at each other. Vito moved into the room. We found that he knew both Shirleen and Daisy. With Daisy, it was understandable if Aunt Angela knew her. Shirleen was a wildcard.

  Shirleen had also morphed into a badass Shirleen I’d never seen before. Her eyes were sharp, her face was serious and she didn’t look like someone you messed with. She certainly didn’t look like someone who had just been talking about cannolis. It was also clear Vito took her seriously. You could see this but it wasn’t spoken. I found this intriguing but decided not to ask. I had more important things on my mind.

  We all sat and Sissy and I told our stories about Dom. We both discreetly avoided Vito kidnapping me because that was likely not a topic for polite conversation.

  When we were done, Uncle Vito said, “That boy. I told my sister. Told her time and again. Now, listen to you two.”

  Sissy and I looked at each other again.

  “I’ll handle it,” he finished.

  Yippee!

  “Really?” I asked.

  “You won’t have any troubles with Dominic anymore,” he assured me.

  “That’s great,” Sissy said. “Thanks Uncle Vito.”

  “I need to have a talk with Dominic myself. When we have our chat, I’ll also tell him to get home, take care of his wife, treat her right, give her some babies, keep her happy,” Vito said to Sissy.

  Uh-oh.

  His eyes turned to me. “As for you, I’ll talk to Lorenzo. He’s a good boy but he needs to settle down and he likes you. You’re with Lorenzo, Dominic won’t get any ideas. I’ll get him to give you a call.”

  Uh-oh.

  “Uncle Vito, we were um… hoping you’d help Sissy out with her divorce,” I said.

  “Vincettis and Zanos don’t divorce. Marriage is life,” Vito replied with finality.

  This was not good.

  “But –” I started.

  “Listen to your Uncle Vito, Ava. Angela and me have been married thirty-three happy years. You gotta work at it. I know what I’m talkin’ about. We just gotta worry about gettin’ you settled. I like you with Lorenzo. I see happy things.”

  Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

  Vito grinned huge. “You’re unhappy. All attitude. You need a man. Lorenzo will put a smile on that pretty face.”

  No, no, no.

  “Big wedding and lotsa beautiful babies,” Uncle Vito went on.

  Oh… my… God.

  I told you I didn’t think this was a good idea, Good Ava reprimanded, arms crossed.

  Oo, lots of Ren’s babies. That means we’d have to sleep with Ren lots and Ren’s HOT! Bad Ava gushed, arms crossed, rubbing her hands up and down her biceps with glee.

  “I don’t think –” I started.

  “It’s settled. I got a meeting,” he got up and looked at Sissy. “I’ll take care of Dominic,” he looked at me. “Lorenzo will t
ake care of you.” Then he clapped his hands together, held them out in front of him and walked out of the room.

  “That didn’t go too good, did it?” Shirleen asked.

  “Sugar, you can say that again,” Daisy answered.

  * * * * *

  “Ren Zano calls you and asks you out on a date, Luke Stark is gonna have a shit hemorrhage. He’s gonna lose his motherfuckin’ mind,” Shirleen said from the of my Range Rover.

  I figured she was not wrong.

  “Maybe we should take Ava to Wyoming. Maybe we should stop by Zip’s Gun Emporium and load up on weapons and then take Ava to Wyoming. Hole up in a cabin somewhere and shoot at anything that moves,” Daisy suggested, sitting beside Shirleen.

  “I ain’t shootin’ at Luke Stark. First, that boy is fine. Second, if I missed he’d beat the shit out of me,” Shirleen said.

  I glanced at Sissy. She had her fingers to her temples and was rubbing in circles.

  “This is unprecedented. A Bad Boy pursuing a Rock Chick with competition on his ass,” Daisy said. “I’m not thinkin’ good thoughts, I’m not gettin’ good vibes, I’m not seein’ good things. We gotta get Ava out of here now. Luke is gonna blow his top. Blow… his… top. Comprende?”

  “Would you two stop talking? You’re freaking me out,” I told them.

  “Girl, better to be freaked out then cuffed to a bed for the next month. Which is exactly where you’re gonna be when Luke finds out you orchestrated this fiasco,” Shirleen told me.

  Ee-yikes!

  I stopped at a red light. “Maybe this is a moot point. Maybe Ren won’t call me. Have you thought that maybe Ren’s not interested in me?” I asked, somewhat hysterically and also loudly.

  “He’s interested in you.” Sissy said quietly.

  My head jerked to her. “What?”

  “Ren’s interested in you,” she repeated.

  “How do you know that?” I asked.

  “He told Tony, Tony told Carla, Carla told me.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, beginning to sound more hysterical and definitely louder.

  “I don’t know. Maybe because you’d sworn off men stating you’d never, never, never, never get involved with another one again. I like Ren. He’s a good guy. You can be a bitch to guys. Ren doesn’t deserve that. He deserves a woman who hasn’t vowed fidelity to her vibrators.”

  I had to ask, why me?

  It was on this thought that we were bumped from behind. Not a big bump but we all jerked forward and snapped back.

  I looked in the rearview mirror. It was another SUV. I couldn’t tell the make because it was too close. The person driving it was a man. He had dark hair but that was about all I could make out before he started to reverse.

  “We’ve been rear-ended,” Shirleen stated the obvious.

  I watched him reverse thinking that was weird then he came forward again.

  “Holy crap. He’s gonna –” I started to say.

  BAM!

  He rear-ended us again, this time a lot more than a bump. Everyone jerked forward harder and snapped back.

  Shit!

  “What the hell?” Daisy asked.

  I watched as he reversed, I looked forward and the light turned green. I slammed the Range Rover in gear and I put the pedal to the floor.

  “Oh my God! What’s going on?” Sissy cried, looking behind her.

  “I don’t know. Is everyone buckled in?” I asked.

  “Do you know that guy?” Daisy was looking to our rear as well.

  “No. Now, I asked, is everyone buckled in?” I shouted, driving like a demon.

  “I’m in,” Shirleen answered.

  “Me too,” Daisy said.

  “Yes,” Sissy added.

  I saw the light in front of us turn red.

  “Shit!” I shouted as I braked, looked in the rearview mirror and saw the SUV behind us wasn’t slowing. “Brace!” I yelled.

  We had a split second to brace then, BANG!

  “What’s going on?” Sissy screeched.

  “Go! Go, go, go!” Shirleen shouted.

  The guy behind us was reversing again.

  “I can’t. It’s red,” I said.

  “Lay on your horn, girl, and go,” Shirleen yelled.

  The guy started coming again. I laid on my horn and went. As I entered the intersection, cars screeched and swerved. To avoid one, I pulled a left into the heavy, three-lane traffic on Hampden Avenue.

  “Don’t stop, just go, keep honking and drive,” Daisy advised.

  I did as I was told, weaving in and out of traffic. I went fast, cars honked, swerved out of my way, threw me gestures and the whole time the SUV followed me.

  “I can’t shake him!” I cried.

  “Keep drivin’,” Shirleen told me.

  “I’ve done this before, I got experience. Go to a police station,” Daisy said.

  “I can’t!” I yelled.

  “Why not?” Sissy screeched.

  “If I go to a police station then Luke will know I’ve been out and he’ll freak.”

  “Better Luke freaks than we die,” Shirleen put in.

  Easy for her to say, she wasn’t facing “payment” and “punishment” tonight.

  Hell and damnation.

  “Hold on!” I shouted and then I drove faster, weaved more and on the overpass to I-25 at the last minute I swung a huge, tight, very illegal uey.

  It was not good at all to swing a huge, tight uey on a highway overpass in an SUV.

  SUVs rolled easily. Very easily.

  We teetered on two wheels, visions of us flipping over the overpass onto the busy highway below flying through my head, every last one of us screamed at the top of our lungs, we slammed back down on four wheels and I motored.

  The SUV following us missed the uey and I kept driving like a madwoman, bent over the wheel, eyes glaring at the road.

  I drove this way for awhile then Sissy said quietly from beside me, “Ava, you’re kind of scaring me.”

  I slowed.

  “I think we lost him,” Daisy murmured, looking behind her.

  “Shee-it,” Shirleen breathed.

  “I need cookies,” I declared.

  * * * * *

  I dropped a shaking Sissy off. She wandered into her Dad’s house looking dazed.

  Shirleen and Daisy followed me to Luke’s. I went in and they drove off, Daisy behind the wheel of my Range Rover.

  The back of the Range Rover was damaged. Shirleen and Daisy were taking it to “a friend” so he would fix it, thus hiding the evidence from Luke that I’d been out, doing stupid shit and getting into trouble.

  I went up to the loft directly to my computer, flipped it on and decided to work and not think about any of this.

  I had no idea who this new person was who was after me and I was just going to pretend it didn’t happen. I was going to find a happy place in my mind and live there forever. I was going to forget about hot guy, macho man Luke Stark wanting to get in my pants, about Dominic Dickhead being a jerk, Uncle Vito ordering people to be murdered and me to be kidnapped, and the upcoming call from Ren Zano, which would lead to a big wedding and lotsa babies.

  I had walked into Nightingale Investigations on a Thursday. It was Sunday and my life wasn’t just pretty fucking complicated, it was completely out-of-control.

  I managed to quit shaking. I did this not with cookies because, after a very thorough search of Luke’s kitchen, I found that Sandra Whoever-She-Was hadn’t stocked Luke’s cupboard with cookies, only healthy eating crap which didn’t do anything to stop the shakes. I did it by alternately working, tidying Luke’s loft and drinking diet liberally mixed with splashes of Sailor Jerry.

  I finally was able to focus and was coming close to finishing my deadline project when I heard the elevator doors slide open. I turned in my chair. Luke walked in silently, eyes on me.

  Or, I should say, his dangerously shining, dark blue eyes were on me.

  Uh-oh.