Shaken Not Stirred (Mixology)

by Alyssa Rose Ivy

  “He got me a gift because we’ve dated three months?”

  Carly laughed. “I guess he wanted an excuse to buy you nice jewelry.” She covered her mouth with her hand. “Oops, sorry.”

  “It’s okay, but does that mean I’m supposed to buy him something?”

  “Maybe? I think he’s planning to take you out somewhere special on Saturday.”

  “Is he always like this?”

  “Does he always make a big deal out of things? No. This is new.”

  “Then why is he doing it?” I filled a glass with water for myself.

  “Because he likes you a lot. Are you complaining that he bought you jewelry and is taking you out?”

  “No. I just hope he doesn’t think he has to. Like, I’m the kind of girl who needs that stuff.”

  “Every girl needs that stuff. It’s just whether you decide to admit it.”

  “That’s not true.” I was surprised by the comment. It didn’t seem very Carly.

  “I’m not saying we all need jewelry and fancy meals, but we all want a guy to show us he thinks we’re worth it.”

  I slipped off my cardigan sweater. Either it was the crowds or Lyle’s music that was getting me hot. “A guy can do that without those kinds of gestures.”

  “They can, but that’s an easy way. Colin’s trying hard with you.”

  “Why do I get the sense that there’s something loaded in that statement?”

  “Colin dropped me off because he had to run into work for an hour. He’ll be here in fifteen minutes.”

  “Meaning?”

  “I’ve been sitting in the Grille for forty-five minutes.” The expression on her face made my stomach drop. If I was hot moments earlier, I was now on fire.

  “I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you aren’t sleeping with that guy, but you want to.”

  Damn it. “I’ve had a crush on him for a while, but it’s nothing.”

  “He’s into you. He looks over at you when he knows you aren’t looking.”

  “Why are you telling me that?”

  “Because I don’t want you hurting Colin. If all you’re waiting for from that guy is an invitation, you’re going to get it.”

  “I’m not interested in getting with him. I just… This is going to sound stupid.”

  “Just tell me.” Her face slowly faded back into her usual upbeat expression.

  “I can’t figure out his drink.”

  “Meaning?”

  “I can always figure out people’s drinks. I mean, it took me what, two minutes to nail yours?”

  “So you can’t figure his out?”

  “No. And it annoys me for no real reason other than I’ve never had this problem. I don’t know if you’ve been listening, but he’s an awesome songwriter. I want to understand him.”

  “Maddy, that’s great and all, but don’t kid yourself. You want to do more than understand him.”

  “Maybe, but not in a fantasy type of way.”

  “My advice is to get all your staring out of your system fast. Colin’s going to notice, and he’s going to be upset.”

  “He checks out girls. I’ve caught him on several occasions.”

  “And do you like it?”

  “I don’t care.” I sipped my water. “It’s a normal reaction.”

  “To be honest, I don’t know if Colin would care, but I do. I love my brother, and you make him happy. I want you to continue to make him happy.” A few tears welled in her eyes and I knew they had nothing to do with her being afraid of me leaving Colin.

  “Do you want to talk?”

  “Did Colin tell you what happened?”

  “No…” I wondered if he wanted it to stay that way, or if his silence was to protect his sister’s privacy.

  “I figured he hadn’t, but you might as well know.”

  “Okay.” I braced myself.

  “My sister thinks I slept with her husband.”

  “What?” I slammed my water down on the bar. “Why would she think that?”

  “He tried to come on to me when he was drunk, and I made the stupid mistake of telling her.” She rested her elbows on the bar. “He defended himself by telling her I was the one trying to seduce him. She believed him that I started it—but she didn’t believe it was only an attempt.”

  “Is that why your parents are so weird with you?”

  “They don’t believe I slept with him, but they think I hit on him. Kim isn’t even talking to me, although she talks to him.”

  “That’s awful.”

  “It is. Isn’t it?” She polished off her drink. “Sometimes life is out of our control. You have to enjoy the moments when you can actually slow it down.”

  Wow. I couldn’t imagine what Carly was going through. I thought my relationship with my parents sucked, but her parents believed she tried to steal her sister’s husband. How little did they think of her?

  “Colin didn’t believe it, did he?”

  She shook her head. “No. He sided with me. He never liked the guy. That’s why I was here this summer. I needed to get away before school started.”

  “That’s why he didn’t tell me about your visit.”

  “Yeah. I don’t think he wanted to explain. I’m sure it’s hard for him to be stuck in the middle.”

  “It’s harder for you.” I made her another cosmo. I held up the bottle of vodka, wordlessly asking her if she wanted it strong. She nodded. I slid the drink over to her. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s not your fault. Why are you apologizing? I just wish I could go back in time and stop myself from telling her.”

  “You told her the truth.”

  “Yeah, sometimes the truth is worse than the lies.”

  “I guess so.” I promised myself I’d call my parents. Maybe I was being dumb about cutting them off. They treated me better than Carly’s treated hers. But something bothered me about her statement. “No. I think you did the right thing.”

  “Yeah?”

  “He would have done it again, and then what would have happened when you tried to explain? It’s better to have gotten it out there.”

  “Thanks. I appreciate that. Colin says exactly the same thing.”

  “I always knew Colin was smart.”

  Chapter Twenty

  I’m one of those people who loves eggnog. I don’t just like it; I love it. It’s not the holidays without it. Although I’ll happily drink it nonalcoholic, I love mine with Southern Comfort. Colin can’t stand the stuff. That’s how I knew he was trying to make me happy when he filled up a glass and put it to his lips.

  I placed a hand on his arm. “You don’t have to drink it.”

  “I know I don’t.” He took a seat on the love seat.

  “Then why are you?”

  “I’m trying to figure out what makes you like it so much.”

  “No.” I settled down next to him. “You’re trying to kiss up to me.”

  “And why would I do that?”

  “I don’t know. I’m trying to figure it out.”

  He set aside his nearly untouched cup and pulled my feet onto his lap, starting in on a foot massage.

  “Okay, now you’re scaring me.” I closed my eyes, my feet very happy with the attention after wearing heels all night during our holiday party. The party was the first event we’d hosted together, and I thought it had gone pretty well, despite how rushed everything was. Colin had made it home about ten minutes before the guests arrived.

  “What? Can’t I just want to give you a foot rub?”

  “No.”

  He laughed. “Should I tell you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Come home with me for the holidays.”

  My eyes opened. “No.”

  “Wow, that was fast. Not even going to pretend to think about it?”

  “I need to spend it with my parents, and you need to make things right.” I nodded over to where Carly slept curled up on the couch. The last of our party guests had left about an
hour before, and we’d cleaned up all the essentials and were taking a break.

  “Can’t you do both? Our parents are only a few hours apart. Christmas Eve with one, Christmas with the other?”

  I shook my head.

  “Please.”

  “Why do you want it so much?”

  “My parents want to see you again. They barely met you at my cousin’s wedding. I talk about you constantly, and they want to know you better.”

  “Talk about me constantly? Do you tell them that my bartending is temporary?” The words spilled out without a filter.

  “Yes, because it is.”

  I’d held in my frustration all night, but I couldn’t anymore. On no less than three occasions he’d described my bartending as a stepping stone to something better. I wondered if he had a clue how condescending it came off.

  “Why do you have to tell everyone that? It’s like you have to explain away my pitiful career.”

  “You want people to think you plan to bartend for the rest of your life?”

  “Why not? There’s nothing wrong with it.”

  His hands stilled on my feet. “You have a college degree, Maddy. You’re going to use it eventually.”

  “Maybe, maybe not.” I moved to sitting.

  “Are you trying to pick a fight?”

  “No. I just wish you weren’t embarrassed of me.”

  “Embarrassed by you? Wasn’t I inviting you home for Christmas?” He put an arm around me. “Generally, you don’t ask someone to come home if you’re embarrassed of them.”

  “You invited the chem degree Maddy home, not the bartending Maddy.”

  “And those are different people?” He eyed me skeptically.

  “I don’t know. You tell me.” I sighed. “Forget I said anything.”

  “Should I?”

  “Yes.” I leaned into his side.

  He opened his arms for me. “How about we put the rest of the cleaning off until tomorrow.”

  “Sounds good.” I closed my eyes, feeling warm, safe, and content in Colin’s arms.

  ***

  I checked my watch again. He was officially twenty-five minutes late, and his one and only text message had come at the two-minute mark. I understood he was busy with work—I got it, but I wasn’t the one who insisted on making reservations for a three-month anniversary.

  I sipped my wine. I’d given in and ordered a drink at the ten-minute mark. Otherwise, they probably would have thrown me out. I was taking up a prime real estate table with a view of the water. It would have been romantic if my date had showed. A few months earlier, I would have been shocked by his tardiness, but I was growing used to it. As an early bird myself, it usually meant I was waiting a long time.

  I texted him again. Should I leave?

  Two minutes later I got a response. No, please. I’ll be there in a few minutes. Go ahead and order something to hold you over.

  I didn’t text back. Instead, I pretended to study the menu so the waiter wouldn’t come over again.

  Ten minutes later, he still hadn’t showed. It was time to leave. I reached for my purse, surprised when I remembered I’d brought my tiny silver clutch. The same clutch with no room for my wallet. I’d slipped in all of a five-dollar bill, my phone, a house key, and Chapstick. Damn it. My five dollars wasn’t going to cover the wine. I texted both Macon and Brody, but neither responded. The only one left was Carly. I was too annoyed to call Colin. I sent her a text.

  Your brother stood me up.

  Seriously? Are you at the restaurant?

  Yes. Any chance you could come by and lend me a few bucks? I don’t have enough to cover my wine.

  I’ll do one better. See you in twenty.

  I’d just sent the waiter away again when Carly showed up, slipping into the seat across from me. “Hey, Mad.”

  “Hey, C. Thanks for this. I should have brought a credit card.” We’d taken to using the new nicknames as a joke, but I kind of liked them.

  “One usually assumes they don’t have to bring money when their boyfriend is buying dinner.”

  “Yeah, he’s blown me off before, but this is pretty bad.”

  “Well, let’s make the night better. Pick out a drink for me.”

  “Wait, we’re staying?”

  She grinned. “Yes.”

  “I guess I’ll pay you back later.”

  “Oh no. This is all on Colin.” She slipped an American Express Gold Card onto the table.

  “Is that Colin’s?”

  She nodded. “I stopped by his office and got it.”

  “So he knows you’re here?”

  “Yes. He was kind of getting his ass handed to him, but he did give us a ticket to a good time tonight.”

  “All right. What are you in the mood for? I’m kind of in the mood for a martini. Do you want one too?”

  “Yes. But make it top shelf.”

  “Carly.”

  “Colin would insist on it.”

  I ordered our drinks, and Carly ordered us both the Surf and Turf consisting of filet mignon and lobster tail. That was only after ordering every appetizer on the menu.

  “Hey, is the brandy sampler good?” she asked when the waiter came back.

  “Very.”

  “We’ll have that. Or make that two.”

  I blanched. “I don’t drink brandy.”

  “So? I’m sure someone in the restaurant does.”

  I gasped. “Carly. This is crazy. Do you realize what the bill is going to be?”

  “Yes, but Colin needs to stop being such a prick before he loses you. I love him, but I’d kick a guy’s ass if he stood me up like this.”

  “Would you really?”

  She shrugged. “I’d want to.”

  I laughed before bringing my martini to my lips. “At least the drinks are good.”

  “Agreed.” Carly clinked her glass against mine.

  Two hours later, we hobbled out of the restaurant. We’d made some new friends and tried more variations of brandy than I knew existed. And I try to stay on top of my liquors. Both of us were far too inebriated to drive, but we were full of a lot of good food.

  “Hopefully, Macon picks up this time.” I didn’t bother to text. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to type anything resembling English.

  “Hey, sunshine.” Macon always made up random nicknames for me.

  “Hey, Macon!”

  “Uh-oh. Why are you drunk dialing me from a date?”

  “I got stood up.”

  “Seriously? I’m sorry, Maddy.”

  “It’s okay. Carly met me. But we had a drink or two and can’t drive.”

  “Or like twenty!” Carly yelled into the phone.

  “Why don’t you wait at the café? I’ll be right there.”

  An hour later, I was deep into a game of Bullshit. Brody had come in from work about five minutes after we did. Carly had opted to come back to our place, and I decided that cards seemed more fun when you were drunk. A lot of things seem more fun when you’re drunk.

  I wasn’t sure if Colin had called, because I’d purposely left my phone across the room. I was in a great mood, and he wasn’t going to ruin it.

  After losing to Carly three times, that girl could bullshit like a pro, I stretched out on the couch. I’d just closed my eyes when the knocking started. I groaned. What was with people coming to the door while I slept? I wanted to ignore it, but I knew Macon and Brody would kill me if I didn’t get it to stop, and Carly was out cold on the love seat. I already knew who it would be.

  I dragged myself to the door and pulled it open.

  “I’m so sorry.” Colin fell to his knees in front of me.

  In my slightly drunken state, I laughed. Probably not the best thing to do.

  He clenched my shirt with his hands. “I know you’re mad, but I wanted to see you.”

  “Don’t you feel like we have this conversation a lot?”

  “It’s only the second time.”

  “Still, that’s a lot for
three months.” I crossed my arms.

  “I couldn’t leave. The Dallas deal fell through. It completely fell through.”

  “Oh. I’m so sorry.” He’d been working months on it. I put a hand on his shoulder. “Tonight’s incident aside, I know that must have been rough.” My anger gave way as I looked into his devastated eyes. He put everything into his job, but sometimes everything isn’t enough.

  His hands released my shirt and moved to my arms. He tugged gently to make me put them down so he could hold my hands. “You know I never would have left you sitting there if I could have avoided it.”

  “I know how hard you worked on that project.”

  “That just makes Paris more important. I can’t fuck up again.”

  “You didn’t mess up.”

  “Yes, I did. I lost this.”

  I sighed. “I’m too tired and drunk to do this right now.”

  “I have something for you.” He pulled a small box from his pocket.

  I opened it. “Wow. They’re beautiful.” The diamond earrings were way over the top, but that was something else I wasn’t up for arguing about.

  “Their each half a carat.”

  “Thank you.” I hugged him, deciding to hold off on giving him the engraved journal I’d bought him. I figured it was time for him to move on from spiral notebooks.

  He took my hand. “No. Thank you. Thank you for putting up with me for the last three months.”

  “It’s late. Do you want to stay here?”

  He didn’t look like he had the energy to drive.

  “Can I?”

  “Do you want to sleep on the couch or squeeze into my twin bed with me?”

  He didn’t hesitate with his answer. “Your bed.”

  “Okay.” I led him into my room. I pulled back the covers, displacing some clothes I’d left on top earlier. I slipped in. I was already in my favorite sweats.

  He undressed down to his underwear and got in next to me.

  Lying there with him, my mind raced. I knew it was time to make a decision, and it wasn’t going to be an easy one to make.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  I put off the conversation with Colin as long as I could. I loved the time we spent together, and I knew my answer would change everything. Colin only got busier after the anniversary dinner debacle. He tried to make time for me, but he couldn’t. We barely ever had sex anymore, and I’m not even sure he noticed. Still, he’d randomly text me and email me pictures of Paris, and tell me how excited he was for us to have time away—I’d never said yes, but he’d taken my non-answer to mean exactly that. To be fair, I wasn’t making a huge effort myself. I’d checked out after he stood me up. I was tired of always taking the backseat to his job. I was tired of rejection, and I wanted someone who found me important enough to put me first. As Lyle sang in one of his songs, A girl needs to know there’s no one else in the world but her.