The End of All Things

by Lissa Bryan

  At the front of the store, Justin vaulted over the Customer Service Desk and searched around on the shelves below until he found a phone book. He flipped through the pages and cursed himself for not thinking to bring along his plastic filter. The tiny words were scrambled all over the page, but he managed to glean enough information to know where he needed to go after consulting the map in the front of the book.

  There wasn’t a pediatrician’s office in town, but there was a small clinic. Justin went out to the wagon and whistled for Shadowfax, who trotted over to him, still chewing on a bunch of flowers she had ripped up, stems and all. He harnessed her and steered the wagon through the silent streets.

  Even the houses on the side avenues had been looted. It surprised him. Though the town was at an intersection of two major highways, he hadn’t expected so many travelers to pass through. So far, the houses he had found out in the rural area around their new home had provided a bounty of canned goods, but he didn’t doubt travelers would begin fanning out once they couldn’t find anything in the city.

  He stopped the wagon in front of the clinic but didn’t unharness Shadowfax. He didn’t expect to be inside for very long. It was likely the place would be looted to the bare walls. Justin hoped there might be some sort of reference texts inside. Failing that, there was a used bookstore a few blocks away.

  As he had expected, the medicine lockers had been broken out and what drugs hadn’t been taken were scattered on the floor in a jumble. He sorted through boxes and bottles, reading them in the beam of his flashlight as best he could. He would have to wait until he got back to the house to be certain.

  He didn’t find any non-refrigerated vaccines, and though he hadn’t really expected to, he was disappointed. He thought for a moment about how he was going to tell Carly. He knew it concerned her. He tried to reassure himself that their exposure to other people would be limited, and so risk was less, but he couldn’t talk himself into believing that there was no need to worry and didn’t think he’d have any more luck convincing Carly.

  He gathered up what he thought would be useful and searched drawers until he found the equipment he thought he might need—items which didn’t seem to have been touched. The scalpel he picked up glittered menacingly in the low light. That particular item he wrapped in a towel and hid deep within his pack. He would prefer Carly not see it. If it came down to that . . . He didn’t even want to think about it.

  There was an office at the back of the clinic, and the books Justin was looking for were on the shelves. They made him feel a little better. He had more than seven months to study up on the subject and perhaps be prepared to deal with any problems that might arise. Like the potatoes, it made him more confident having a goal, something he could work toward rather than waiting helplessly to see what fate would dish out to them.

  Justin exited the clinic to find that Shadowfax had got herself and the wagon stuck when she wandered away to graze on the elevated flower beds. She swished her tail when she saw him, and Justin had to help her figure out how to back the wagon out of the position she’d gotten it stuck in. Justin shook his head. “No wonder you’re fat,” he told her and patted her sleek neck.

  “Next stop, the vet’s office,” Justin told her. Shadowfax flicked her ears at the word and Justin chuckled. “Not fond of the vet, eh? Well, don’t worry. The office is closed until further notice.” She turned her head to look back at him, and Justin gestured to the road in front of them. “Ladies first.” She ambled forward and Justin leaned back in his seat, the reins held loosely in one hand. Except for a light tug to the left or right, he didn’t need to use them. But, to prevent another stuck wagon, he tied her halter to a pillar when he stopped the wagon in front of the veterinarian’s office.

  There, he had more luck. It hadn’t been looted, so he was able to find parasite blockers and the vitamins Carly had wanted for Sam. There was also a nice selection of pain medication; some of them were the same drugs that humans used. He glanced over at the dark, silent refrigerator where the vaccines had been stored and sighed. His biggest concern for Sam was rabies, as often as he hunted, and all Justin was able to do was protect him from heartworm and fleas.

  The storage room contained a large selection of pet food, which he loaded into the wagon. A memory of Carly’s disgust when he mentioned eating dog food to her back in the grocery store in Juneau flitted through his mind, and he chuckled.

  His next stop was the book store, where he found the door was still intact. It seemed people were not yet aware of what an incredible treasure trove of knowledge the store represented. As the years passed, the information would only grow more valuable. He was glad he’d thought to bring his lock picking kit. He wouldn’t want to leave the books exposed to the elements by breaking the door open.

  Inside he paused, a familiar stench sour in his nostrils. He swept a flashlight around until he found her. The woman was sprawled in one of the chairs, her book still open on her lap, and he estimated she’d been dead for a month or so. Insects scattered and squirmed under the beam of his light, and he saw a small, empty vial of pills on the floor under her slack hand.

  Once, he had seen human bodies simply as empty containers, and the old Justin would have walked past her without a second glance, but the new Justin—Carly’s Justin—gave her the small gift of last respects.

  On the wall was a banner announcing a book festival. Justin tugged it down and laid it over the woman’s body. He wondered why she had come to the bookstore, but maybe it had been the place that had once made her happiest. He laid the book on top of her makeshift shroud.

  He wondered what this woman had been like and what had led her to the choice she made. Loneliness? Fear she might be victimized? Grief? Despair? He began to see how precious Carly’s hope was; hope could give a person a reason to go on when there was nothing else left. He left the woman to her tomb of tomes and headed for the back.

  In the staff break room, he found a snack machine. Justin smashed the glass front with the butt of his flashlight and scooped the snacks into one of the store satchels. There were also a couple of large containers of coffee along with containers of creamer and sugar. He checked inside the refrigerator and got a couple of cans of soda and a few more non-perishable snacks from the lunch bags.

  From the store, he carried totes stuffed full of books for Carly. She was a fast reader, and he hated the idea of her snowed in with nothing to read. There was an entire section of baby books, and Justin chose a dozen at random, including one on natural childbirth and one on breastfeeding he thought might be helpful.

  At the front counter, Justin found something delightful: a battery-powered CD player. Thanks to the hours of duets they’d sung on the road, he knew quite a few of her favorite groups. He filled his backpack with CDs. The store also had a wide selection of used DVDs, and he briefly considered ways to rig up a TV for her, but he remembered the movie in Fraser had just seemed to make her sad, watching memories of a world that was dead and gone.

  He was searching the drawers below the counter for anything useful when he saw a picture hanging on the wall behind the register. He couldn’t be certain, but it looked like the woman in the chair. In the photo, she grinned, her eyes sparkling with excitement, as she and a customer posed in the midst of making a purchase. A dollar bill was mounted in the matting below the image, above a brass plate engraved with words he could not read. Justin glanced back over at the still form below the banner and understood why she had chosen this place. She had not been able to survive the death of her dream.

  As Justin headed for the door, he saw a book on primitive woodworking and paused to pick it up, thinking it might be possible such information could come in handy at a later time. He opened the book to a random page and saw a photo of a project he instantly knew he wanted to do. But where would he get the tools? An idea occurred to him, and he found another phone book under the sales counter. The place he was looking for was only about a block away.

  Justin led
Shadowfax down the street to the museum. It was located in a Victorian house with a wide lawn. A sign, which swayed and creaked in the breeze, gave the hours of operation and admission rates. As with the bookstore, he respected the contents too much to simply muscle his way in and leave them exposed to the elements. Picking the locks took only a moment.

  The door squealed as he pushed it open, and he listened intently for any reaction to the sound before stepping into the hallway. The interior was dimmed by the heavy curtains over the windows, and it smelled pleasantly of old wood and dusty cloth. Except for a few signs which asked visitors not to touch, it looked as though he had stepped back in time into the home of a nineteenth century family.

  The two oil lamps on the mantle were the first things he took. He wrapped them in a shawl draped over the back of one of the scroll backed sofas, as though its wearer had just left the room, and carried them out to the wagon. Shadowfax stomped her hoof when she saw him, as though to express her impatience to be leaving. “Just a few more minutes, I promise,” he said.

  It took him a while to carry everything out to the wagon. From the kitchen, he selected a set of cast-iron cookware, suited for use on the stove they had at home. He hadn’t paid much attention to what they had in the house already but was operating on the principle of “better safe than sorry.” He found an old-fashioned peeler mounted on the edge of the table. A crank turned the food in a spiral beneath the blade. It wasn’t something they needed, but it seemed the kind of item that would amuse Carly. Likely, she’d insist they have potatoes for supper just so she could try it out.

  In the open pantry, there was a tin tub with a washboard. Carly had been washing their clothes in sinks and creeks when she could, and Justin realized with a bit of surprise how their tasks had fallen into traditional gender roles. With a grimace of guilt, he vowed to take on more of the household chores, but his grimace turned into a grin when he pictured himself offering to “share” the duty of mucking Shadowfax’s stall. He was pretty sure that was one job she’d be glad to leave categorized as “men’s work.”

  He gathered up the tub and washboard and piled in other household items he thought Carly would find useful. On his way out, he grabbed the small pendulum clock from the mantle. He could set it tomorrow at noon by watching when the fence posts cast no shadows. Carly would be glad to have a clock again, even if it wasn’t completely precise.

  He found a selection of woodworking tools in the basement; it was the reason he had gone there in the first place. It took him a while to collect all he needed. He wouldn’t have to find a lumber store, thankfully. He had noticed some wood stored in the barn that would work perfectly for his project. The more he thought about it, the more excited he became about his plan. He’d never built anything, but the book made it seem like something he’d be able to handle.

  He lugged the last box of tools out to the wagon and relocked the museum door behind him. “One more stop,” he told Shadowfax, who seemed a little huffy at being drawn away from yet another flower bed. “Then we can go home, and you can get some dinner. I only pray you don’t faint from hunger along the way.”

  The maternity store was untouched as well, though the door was unlocked. Justin stepped inside, and his gaze landed on an outfit on the clearance rack. He grinned. This was going to be fun . . .

  Carly flew to the front door when she heard the jingling of Shadowfax’s harness and the crunch of the wagon wheels on the gravel. Justin was home, and all was right with her world again. She ran out to greet him, jumping up into his arms and wrapping her legs around his waist as Sam bounced around his feet.

  “Whoa, I guess you’re happy to see me,” Justin chuckled. He gave Carly a kiss, set her back down on her feet, and patted Sam’s head. Tigger gave an imperious yowl so he bent and petted her, too. “How are you feeling?”

  “I’m mad at you,” Carly said, pressing kisses all over his face. “Furious, actually.”

  “I can see that.”

  “Shut up. Let me finish yelling at you.” Carly tilted her head and kissed him, long and slow and deep. She drew away and brushed his lips with her own as though she couldn’t help giving him one last kiss before she continued. “You scared me to death. You’ve been gone all day.”

  “I went shopping,” Justin said. She gave him a reproving glance and peeked into the wagon, but the contents were concealed under a tarp.

  “What did you get?”

  “You’ll see. Let me unharness Shadowfax, and then we’ll go through it all.”

  Carly watched him through the window. He patted the horse on her shoulder, and she bumped him with her nose. She saw Justin laugh and give Shadowfax the petting she wanted while they walked to the barn. A few minutes later, Justin emerged with bits of hay on his clothes, which must have come from giving Shadowfax her dinner. He stopped at the wagon, grabbed two large bags, and carried them into the house. He brought them into the living room, and Carly sat down on one of the armchairs, nearly bouncing with eagerness to see what they contained.

  Justin sat down in the chair opposite of hers and opened the bag. “I found some maternity clothes at a shop in town. I hope you like them.”

  “Lemme see! Lemme see!”

  He pulled out a dress that looked like a muumuu in bright orange, hideously bedecked with giant blue flowers, and handed it to her, with an expectant expression. However, Carly struggled to keep the horror from her face. It was, quite possibly, the ugliest thing she had ever seen—almost impressively ugly. She didn’t even know what to say. Justin smiled coaxingly, and Carly had to drop her gaze.

  “Oh, and I found you these.” He pulled another outfit from the bag. It was lavender, printed with white flowers, and had a pair of matching pants that looked like they’d fit a bull elephant. Carly bit the inside of her lip. Hard.

  “And this one, for when the weather gets a little warmer.”

  It was a shapeless dress in the most hideous shade of brown Carly had ever seen, and it was decorated with lime green circles. It looked like it had been made from a hippie’s discarded curtains.

  “Well, what do you think?”

  Carly looked up at Justin and saw his eyes were twinkling with mischief. He burst into laughter. “You should have seen your face!”

  She swatted his shoulder. “That’s not funny!” But she laughed even as she scolded him.

  “I couldn’t help it. I’m sorry, but I had to.” He handed the second bag to her.

  Carly took a peek inside and was relieved to find comfortable clothes in a variety of earth tones. Not the bright, vibrant colors she usually preferred, but nothing tacky. She smiled. “Thank you.”

  “I think you’ll like the coat.” He pulled it out, and Carly gave a little squeal. It was heavy, down filled, and bright pink with wide bands of faux fur around the cuffs and hood. “It’s so cute! Thank you!” Carly kissed him, and Justin beamed. He’d gotten her white snow boots, lined with fur. They didn’t match the coat perfectly, but she could tell he’d tried. The scarf and mittens, however, were blue. “They didn’t have anything that would match,” he said apologetically.

  Carly didn’t care. The amount of effort he’d put behind it was touching. She was a lucky woman, she reflected, as she drew him down for a long, sweet kiss.

  Carly went to try on one of her maternity outfits while Justin unloaded more items from the wagon. She pulled out the tummy of the jogging suit and tried to picture how she’d look when she was further along. Short and fat, apparently. She laughed at herself a little. She’d never been vain, but she was a little worried Justin wouldn’t find her attractive once she got bigger.

  She went back out into the living room and saw him in the kitchen, plunking a few cans onto the table.

  “The grocery store had already been looted,” he said. His words had that carefully nonchalant tone that she was beginning to recognize as his don’t-worry-Carly voice. “This was all that was left.”

  Like the grocery store at home in Juneau. “During th
e Crisis?”

  Justin shook his head. “Some of it, perhaps, but there was little debris inside, which makes me think it was done by people in the town since the Crisis ended.”

  “Are they still in the town?”

  “I didn’t see anyone, but they might have hidden when they saw me coming.”

  Carly shuddered, thinking of Justin being watched from behind curtains, maybe by someone with a gun or crossbow. “Please, don’t go back there.”

  “I won’t. I think I got everything we need.”

  “Was there a vet’s office?”

  “I got de-wormer for all of the animals.” He gave her a little smile. “Though I probably should have gone ahead and stocked up for other creatures. You know, for when you start collecting pigs, elephants, and monkeys.”

  Carly appreciated his attempt at humor, but it didn’t distract her from the very troublesome reality of her animals having no protection from disease. “What about vaccinations? For the baby?”

  He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Carly.”

  A chill swept over her before she sat down heavily in one of the armchairs. “What are we going to do?”

  Justin rubbed the back of his neck. “Honey, there really isn’t much we can do. The baby will get a certain level of immunity from your milk, at least temporarily. I’ll keep checking clinics we pass, and maybe we’ll find something.”

  She knew he added the last sentence because he wanted to give her some hope, but she could tell he didn’t expect to find anything. She pressed her hands over her still-flat abdomen as though she could shield her baby from the dangers of their new, uncertain world. She told herself she just had to have faith. Surely, if all of this was meant to happen, she wouldn’t be blessed with her baby just to see it get sick and die.

  Justin handed her two canvas totes, likely his way of distracting her from her worries. Carly peeked inside. “Books!”