Friends and Lovers

by Tinnean

  “Here. Have some popcorn.” TJ offered him a big bowl.

  “Thank you.” Farmer took a handful. And then another handful, and another. “This is good!” he mumbled around a mouthful.

  “Don’t sound so surprised. Haven’t you ever had white cheddar popcorn before?”

  He shook his head, swallowed, and licked the salty goodness from his fingers. TJ was watching him, and for some reason he blushed. “Just buttered,” he murmured and ducked his head. And that was only at the movies.

  Josh put the DVD into the player, gently pushed the door closed, and stepped aside so everyone could see the TV screen.

  The obligatory FBI warning done, the screen lit up with various scenes from the movie. Across the bottom of the screen were the options.

  “Josh, I’m not sure this is a movie that would interest Farmer.” TJ sounded worried, which made Farmer feel good. No one at home cared much about whether he would enjoy whatever Daddy or Billy Ray decided to watch.

  “Oh, no, it’s okay,” he hurried to say. The characters seemed to be nicely dressed, in long-sleeved white shirts and dress pants. Porn movies didn’t start that way, did they?

  “Cool. I love this movie. C’mon back, Joshboy.” Teddy was holding his arms open.

  Oh, God, they weren’t going to start making out, were they? Farmer stared hard at the screen, determined not to watch them like some hick boy who’d never been in the big city before. Which he wasn’t, since he’d grown up in Savannah.

  But out of the corner of his eye, he saw Josh settle himself next to Teddy, and Teddy just put his arm around Josh’s shoulder. Still, if they wanted to make out, Farmer decided it would be okay.

  To his surprise, he found himself drawn into the plot of the movie, about a young Mormon sent out into the big, bad city to make converts. He couldn’t help laughing when the gay neighbor and his female roommate, who was a little black girl, beat the Mormon and his friend at a basketball game.

  It bothered him when a single kiss resulted in the young Mormon being sent home in Shame.

  It should have bothered him when the gay neighbor followed the Mormon boy to the airport, but he was so caught up in the story that he didn’t even give it a thought.

  ‘What if you’re the one I’ve waited for my whole life, and I let you go?’ the gay boy said to the Mormon boy.

  NO! You can’t let him go! Farmer thought, and it didn’t matter to him that they were two guys. This was how it should be.

  The airport was snowed in, and they had to spend the night in a nearby hotel.

  It’s all right, they’re going to be together, there’s going to be a happy ending! Never mind that according to his family and his church that would not be a happy ending because they were sinners and would be going straight to hell.

  Only when the gay boy woke up the next morning, he was alone, and all that remained to prove it hadn’t just been his imagination was a pocket watch the Mormon boy’s grandpa had given him.

  Farmer’s chest started hurting.

  The Mormon boy went home, willing to face the possibility of being excommunicated rather than stay with the gay boy. He was confronted by his daddy and the elders of their church, and when he faced them down, Farmer wanted to turn around and high-five TJ.

  He was almost bubbling over with pleasure, sure this was the happy ending he’d been expecting. After all, in Hollywood movies, the good guy would explain why his way was the right way, and the people who were causing problems would hang their heads, admit they had it all wrong, and promise they’d seen the light.

  But that didn’t happen. Farmer stared in disbelief as things became worse instead of better in the Mormon boy’s home. His daddy found more and more reasons not to come home, and his momma wouldn’t even look at him when she talked to him.

  And then she slapped him...

  Farmer didn’t realize tears were running down his cheeks.

  “Farmer? Big Tom!”

  “Bobby Joe, what’s wrong?”

  “It’s… That’s the way it is at home; it’s just like my folks! I… I…” He bit his lips, but it was too late to prevent a sob from escaping. “They don’t hear me when I talk; they don’t see me when I’m sitting right at the table with them! I… I wanted to go to college, but Daddy wouldn’t let me. He said it would give me ideas and the next thing I’d be thinking I was better than my brothers and my sisters, and… I wouldn’t have! I … I…” But somehow he couldn’t make himself lie and say he loved them. He was fond enough of some of them, like Jenny and Jimmy Jack, who was the baby, but the others…

  TJ pulled him into his arms, holding him and stroking a hand that was surprisingly comforting up and down his back.

  “I’m sorry. I’m being a baby.” Billy Ray had always made fun of him when he cried, and so he’d stopped crying. He couldn’t believe he had lost control like this.

  “No, you’re not,” Teddy said. “I know what you’re talking about.”

  “How can you?” Farmer didn’t want to look up. He knew his face would be all spotted and blotchy, his eyes and his nose red. And it was so nice being held by someone. No one had done that since he’d been a little kid.

  “Farmer, my Grandpa Caleb wants to see me and Cath, so he knows he’d better not say anything about Daddy, but Daddy isn’t welcome there any more. And BT never was. They all blame him for me and Daddy being gay. When I called Momma and told her about Josh and me, she screamed that I was damned and she didn’t have a son any more, and slammed the phone down.”

  “Teddy, you didn’t tell me that!” Josh was pale, and his lower lip trembled until he took it between his teeth.

  “I didn’t want you upset. Besides, Grandpa Caleb wasn’t going to try and smooth it over this time. How could he call and say she was just upset and hadn’t meant it? Even if he did and made Momma get on the phone, she’d just say she was going to pray for me.”

  “Maybe – maybe we’d better postpone the wedding.”

  “NO!” Teddy pulled Josh into his arms. “We’re not postponing it, we’re not canceling it, we’re not doing anything but getting married on December 25th!”

  “I’m sorry,” Farmer whispered into TJ’s chest. “I’ve made everyone unhappy.”

  “You haven’t, Farmer.”

  But he must have, because the big man gave a final, awkward pat to his shoulder, and then let him go.

  Kira chose that moment to stalk into the room. “You’re still here, Farmer! Cool! Let’s go dancing!”

  TJ handed him a handkerchief, which he accepted gratefully, and he dried the tears on his cheeks and blew his nose. “But I thought you were going to have a girl’s night with Miss Cath.”

  “She’s bein’ a pain in the –” Mr. Tom frowned at her, and Teddy glared. Kira changed what she’d been about to say. “She’s a spoilsport, and I want to go out!”

  “Farmer was watching this movie with us.”

  “It’s almost finished.”

  “Then you can wait – ”

  Kira started to pout.

  “It’s okay,” Farmer said, although it wasn’t. Up until he’d made a fool of himself by crying like a baby, he’d been enjoying spending the time with these men. “I’ll watch it another time.”

  “You’re not going to find this at any Blockbuster in Savannah. Come over the next time we have movie night.”

  “But you’ve seen this before.”

  “We can watch it again. It’s a good movie.”

  “Can we go now? Please?”

  “Sure, Kira. Bye everyone.” His eyes went to TJ, who smiled at him. “I’ll wash your handkerchief before I give it back to you.”

  “No rush. Keep it as long as you like.” TJ was looking at him as if he… as if he liked him!

  “Thank you.” He smiled back at him.

  “You’re welcome, Farmer. Take it easy.”

  “Come on!” As Kira grabbed his arm and dragged him out, Farmer couldn’t help thinking she was acting like a spoiled brat.


  He tramped down on that thought immediately, feeling disloyal to her. She wasn’t spoiled, and she wasn’t a brat. She actually treated him pretty well, most of the time. After all, her boyfriends were usually college boys who were smart and knew how to dress. He was so lucky she was willing to have him, a redneck boy who’d only gone as far as high school, as her boyfriend.

  “We’ll take my car, sugar,” she told him and tossed him the keys.

  And at least she let him drive.

  8. Worries, Worries –

  “Tom – ” Jack was alone in the work trailer, and he was grinning. He opened his mouth to say, ‘I’m gonna tell the men you’re having problems with the fax machine – ’ their code for ‘I want you, I’m on my way home, get the lube out and get naked,’ but before he could,

  “I’m in a rush, Jack. Can this wait?”

  “Uh…”

  “Thanks, babe. Don’t hold dinner. I’ll see you when I see you. Bye.”

  Jack stared at his cell phone, and his hands began to shake. Tom had hung up on him!

  What was going on? Over the last couple of weeks, he’d seemed to become more and more… not distant, but… distracted?

  Jesus, Tommy wasn’t getting tired of him, was he? They’d been together for some years now, and Jack would have sworn Tom loved their life together. He knew for a fact that Tom loved his kids, and often referred to them as the children of his heart.

  Jack worried a thumbnail. Could it be that Teddy and Josh having decided to tie the knot made Tom unhappy that Jack had never asked him?

  Although Jack had wanted to. He’d even obliquely broached the subject after Teddy had proudly announced he’d asked and Josh had said yes. Tom had looked surprised, then hugged him and told him that as far as he was concerned, they were as married as they needed to be.

  But he’d lived a pretty wild life back in the day. Was he growing bored? Was having one man in his life not enough?

  There was a tap on the trailer door, and Farmer John poked his head in. “Sorry to disturb you, Mr. Jack, but the radio’s saying that storm system isn’t looking good. Power’s gonna be knocked out for sure.”

  Jack shook himself out of it. This had been a bad storm season, and a lot of damage had been done. Even though the season had officially ended in November, it didn’t pay to relax and get careless.

  “Okay, make sure the small generators are gassed up.” There were any number of older people living in their neighborhood, and once the power went out, they stood a good chance of losing everything in their freezers. He’d make it a point to stop by the various homes, leaving the generators to run for a couple of hours, guaranteeing hot showers and a chance to cook.

  “Got it, Mr. Jack.”

  Jack pushed his worries about his lover out of his mind and went out to take care of business.

  After all, that was what he did best.

  It was getting dark, the winds were increasing, and the rain was starting. It wasn’t much right now, but the forecast was for heavy downpours. He’d closed down all the jobsites and sent his men home, then had stopped by Miz Honey’s with Farmer John to see if she and Charlie might want to ride out the storm at the ranch, but she’d insisted they were all right.

  “We’ve got that generator you and Tom gave us. Where is he? I’m surprised he didn’t come here with you.”

  “He would have, Miz Honey, but he had some errands he had to run.” Jack hoped his answer was vague enough, but she gave him a sharp glance.

  “Well, if you have everything you need, we’d better be going,” Farmer said.

  “Oh, yes! Get along home before the skies open up!”

  Jack sent Farmer a grateful look, and bent and kissed Miz Honey’s cheek. “Call us if you need anything.”

  “We will. Drive carefully, now.”

  Farmer followed him out to their pickups. “If you don’t mind, Mr. Jack, I’ll stay at the ranch?” He was still tentative about his place, not so much in the company, but on a personal level.

  “You’re more than welcome, Farmer.” He knew things weren’t going well at Farmer’s home, and although he was unaware of the long and the short of it, he had a feeling Farmer’s relationship with Kira was at the bottom of it.

  “Thanks. I… uh… don’t want you to think I’m leaving Daddy high and dry. He’s got Billy Ray to help him.”

  “Isn’t Billy Ray married?”

  “Yes, but he spends more time at home than with Becky. I don’t think she’s happy, but - I mean, she’s a good Christian girl, and she understands sometimes Billy Ray needs to be at home to help out Daddy and Momma…” He shifted uncomfortably and changed the subject. “It was really nice of you to invite that poor guy to stay at the ranch.”

  “Bread on the water.” Jack shrugged it off. He’d come across the young widower and his three toddlers while at Home Depot. They’d raced up the coast ahead of the storm, and the poor kid had run out of gas in Savannah. “I don’t want to think what he’d have had to go through. All the hotels and motels are full up, and the shelters are having to turn people away.”

  “I’ll bet you anything it turns out to be a tempest in a teapot.”

  “I wouldn’t be surprised, but after Charley, Frances, and Jeanne, I’m not taking chances.”

  “Oh, no, Mr. Jack! I didn’t mean…”

  “I know, Farmer.” He glanced up at the sky, blinking as rain hit his face. “We’d better get a move on. It’s starting to rain harder.”

  “Yes, sir. I sure do hope Miss Cath and Kira have dinner ready. I’m starved!”

  Jack gave him a friendly slap on the back, went to his own truck, and got in. But at the back of his mind he worried about Tom. Dammit, where was he?

  Jack was fretting. It was almost 9, Tom had been gone all day, and they’d lost power once already. If they did again, he’d power up the big generator.

  The rain was coming down in sheets, and he hated the thought of Tommy being out there in it.

  Everyone else was at the ranch – his daughter, his son and future son-in-law, Kira, a few of their friends, watching videos, while Farmer, who’d decided to apply to a local community college, was on the computer, Andretti giving him some tips on the best courses to take.

  Well, if Andretti was with Farmer, at least he wasn’t with Tom, Jack thought with sour satisfaction, but Tom still wasn’t home. When he got back, he’d have a lot to answer for, Jack promised himself.

  Lights – a car’s headlights – flashed through the windows along the side of the house and disappeared as the car bypassed the circular drive out front and rolled to a stop.

  Jack breathed a sigh of relief and hurried toward the kitchen. Tommy was home.

  The back door flew open, driven by the wind, and Tom was blown in, followed by a big man. Well, the man had no choice but to follow him. Tom seemed to have a death grip on his arm.

  Resolutely Jack ignored the buff, blond man who stood beside his lover, staring down at the floor as if it was the most fascinating thing in the world. At least he had the courtesy to be uncomfortable confronting Tom’s partner.

  “Tom, where have you been? Do you know how worried I’ve been?” He cringed. His tone of voice reminded him of Julie, his second wife, and her complaints and reproaches whenever he’d come home late. He’d never cheated on her, but she’d always seemed to be waiting for him to take that first step.

  “I wanted to surprise you.”

  “Well, you’ve succeeded.” Jack was more than surprised. He was scared. Had Tommy brought this man home to make Jack realize what they’d had was over? Normally he wasn’t inclined to think that way, but Tom had been so freaking secretive these past weeks…

  “Merry Christmas, buddy!”

  “Christmas isn’t for another two weeks.”

  Tom tried to frown at him, but there was subdued excitement in his eyes, and Jack’s right hand clenched into a fist. Goddammit, Tom was his, and he wasn’t going to let him go, not after all it had taken to get him here
.

  The big man beside Tom cleared his throat and raised his head, and Jack found himself staring into a pair of blue eyes he hadn’t seen in more than half his life.

  “S-Sam?” His voice cracked. He could hardly believe that after all these years, his brother was standing here in front of him.

  “Hello, little brother. Although you’re not so little any more.”

  “Yes, it’s Sam!” Tom was almost bouncing with excitement. “I drove up to Myrtle Beach to get him. I didn’t want to say anything until I was sure – ”

  “Sure about what?”

  “That he’d want to come back to Savannah.”

  “What- How- Why- Where- ”

  “You want those answered in any particular order?” Sam’s grin was lopsided, and it was obvious his brother was as nervous as he was.

  “Sam, don’t give him a hard time.” The voice was warm and husky, and it wasn’t Tom who spoke, but a woman. She was almost as tall as his brother, beautiful, dark-skinned, with astonishing green eyes.

  “This is Evangeline, Jack. She’s my wife.”

  “Hello, Jack.”

  “Uh… Hello, Evangeline.”

  “I need to know if you have a problem with that.”

  “With what?” Jack was not only nervous, but now he was confused.

  “The fact that I’m married to a black woman.”

  The light suddenly went on. “Is that why you left all those years ago?”

  “Didn’t Daddy tell you?”

  “You’re kidding, right? He just dropped dark hints about you doing something unnatural. I thought he meant you were gay. Sorry, Evangeline.”

  His sister-in-law burst into a deep, full-bodied laugh.

  Sam glared at her. “I don’t see how you can find that amusing. My father is a bigoted old man who – ”

  “Knowing you, darlin’, how could I find that anything but amusing?”

  “Wait a second. Tom, you said you went up to Myrtle Beach. Is that where you’re living, Sam?”

  “Yes. Vangie and I have lived there since Daddy found out about us and threw me out.”

  “Dammit!”

  “What?” Sam looked hurt, and Jack pulled him into a hug, the first physical contact with his brother in almost thirty-four years.