“Okay, maybe you should doubt me more often.”
“This is the place?” He glanced around and then back at me. “Are you sure?”
“It’s the address she sent me. Maybe I put something into the map wrong.” I stared at my phone. “I didn’t even type it in, though.”
“I’m sure it’s nothing you did. You did meet this woman at a pub first thing in the morning, right? Maybe she was a little too intoxicated to give you the right address.”
“No way. She wasn’t drinking at all. I’m sorry, Max.” I frowned. “I guess I’m blowing our first night out in Dublin.”
“None of that.” He cupped my chin and drew my lips to his. After a soft slow kiss he looked into my eyes. “It can’t be ruined as long as we are together. It’s still early. We can try to catch a movie or something. Let’s go.”
I was relieved that Max wasn’t mad, but still disappointed that I had bungled things. As usual, I had set my expectations for our time in Ireland very high and found myself crushed at the lack of success. As we started to turn back around in the alley, a door swung open. A man stumbled out with a laugh that was followed by enchanting music.
“Max, wait!” I grabbed his arm and pulled him back. “Did you hear that?”
“Yes, I did.” He stared at the door as it closed again. “I thought that was just an emergency exit. There’s no sign or anything.”
“She did say it’s a local place that no tourists know about. Maybe that’s why they don’t advertise.”
“Well, it sure looks like he had a good time.” Max laughed as the man hung onto the wall as he made his way down the alley.
“Yes, it does. Let’s check it out. It’ll be fun.”
“Alright, but if it’s rough, we’re out of there, okay?”
“For sure.” I nodded.
Max held the door open for me as I stepped inside. The first thing I noticed was the smell. It was a bit stale, like spilled beer and ancient peanuts. The space was also very small, with only a few tables and a short bar. None of that mattered once I heard the music. I tightened my hand on Max’s and glanced over my shoulder to smile at him.
“This is absolutely perfect.”
“It’s pretty great.”
“Let’s find a table.” I led him through the few occupied tables to an empty one. There was a small stage beside the bar. An older man stood on it and sang as he played a guitar. “His voice is amazing.”
“Yes, it is.”
“I’m glad we found this place.”
“Me too.” Max smiled and opened his mouth to say more, but just then a waitress made her way over.
“What can I get for you?”
“Is there a menu?” Max glanced around at the other tables. The woman laughed and shook her head.
“No, sorry, sonny, no menus here. If you don’t know what we have to offer then you must be new. You have three choices.”
As she rattled off the options, I was drawn back into the music that surrounded us. It haunted me inside, as if it was a melody I held dear—even though I’d never heard it before.
“And you, miss?”
“I’ll have whatever he’s having.” I smiled at her.
When she walked away, Max stared into my eyes. “You do realize that I ordered duck.”
“Duck?” I scrunched up my nose. “No way. I’m not eating that.”
“I’m kidding. I just can’t get enough of the way you crinkle your nose like that.”
“Oh, really?” I shook my head. “I’m sure it’ll get old eventually.”
“Your nose? Maybe, but it will still be cute.”
“No I meant it will get old that I crinkle it. I mean, we’re still in the honeymoon phase, right?”
“Honeymoon phase?” He cleared his throat and settled his gaze on me in a way that I knew meant he wasn’t pleased. “I don’t think we’re in any phase. We love each other, that’s that.”
“Right, but as time goes by, I’m sure we won’t find everything that one other does so endearing.”
“I will.” He smiled at the waitress as she brought us both a beer.
When she walked away I leaned closer to him. “Max, you don’t have to say that. I believe our relationship should be more realistic.”
“Realistic?” He sighed and ran his fingertips through his hair. “What’s so unrealistic about being with the most amazing woman I’ve ever met?”
“I just don’t want you to think that you always have to compliment me.”
“Sammy, I know I don’t always have to compliment you. I compliment you because I look at you and a million compliments fill my mind. If I don’t say at least one, my brain might just explode. Is that what you want, Samantha?” He arched a brow. “Do you not care if my brain explodes?”
“Max, stop.” I laughed and grabbed his hand across the table. “You’re so wonderful.”
“I hope you’re going to think that for the next eighty years.”
“Eighty?”
“Sixty?”
“Ninety?”
“Two hundred?”
“Okay, okay, for as long as we get.” I lifted my beer to toast. “To everything that is to come.”
“I can definitely drink to that.”
We clinked glasses and sipped our beer.
“Wow, this is delicious.”
“Yes, I would say it’s better than any beer I’ve ever had.” Max took another long swallow.
The night continued on with the singer on stage serenading us and with delectable local food filling our bellies. But the part I treasured the most was my time with Max. I’d constructed so many thoughts about the future of our marriage in my head. I expected that our desire for each other would wane—that what he thought was adorable about me would eventually become what he hated.
But maybe Max was right. Maybe our relationship didn’t have to follow that particular path. I decided to settle into the warmth that we shared and ignore the anticipation of the future.
Chapter 8
When it was time for the bar to close, Max and I walked arm in arm back to the hotel. Luckily not a drop of rain fell, but the entire city had a hush to it. It wasn’t quiet, as plenty of tourists were leaving the bars and clubs. But the way the sky enveloped everything with its heavy presence seemed to give it a sense of quiet despite the chaos.
“That was quite a night.” Max held the elevator doors open for me. “I’m pretty wiped out. I just have to do a few things on the computer.”
“Aw, really? You still have to work?”
“A blog never sleeps.” He smiled at me. “Plus I need to make sure the website is in working order. With the book signings coming up the traffic always increases.”
“Alright, I suppose I can share you with a computer screen for a little while.”
“Not too long, I promise.” He gave me a quick kiss before we stepped off the elevator.
I spent some time in the bathroom washing my face and changing into pajamas. While Max occupied himself at the computer, I decided to write a bit more in our relationship journal. I reached into my bag to find it. My heart dropped as the more I searched, the more certain I became that it wasn’t there. For a brief moment my entire body flashed hot. Had I lost it? Could I possibly have left behind a journal that important, filled with incredibly private information about my relationship with Max? What if someone found it? What if they read it?
As the panic spread through my body I began to look in other bags. I tried to appear as casual as I could. If Max knew I’d lost something, he’d want to know what it was. I couldn’t risk telling him or he might be furious. Even though Max was normally very understanding, could anyone really be understanding about their personal information being available for prying eyes to see?
“Wow, Sammy, there’s been a big increase of followers on your blog. I wonder what’s drawing them in?”
My throat grew dry. Could that be a coincidence? The fact that I’d lost the journal and my blog followers increased
led me to the overwhelming conclusion that someone had found the journal and posted it online somewhere.
“Max, can I use the computer?”
“Sure, I’ve done my updates.” He stood up and stopped suddenly when he looked into my eyes. “Everything alright?”
“Yes, it’s fine. I just forgot about something that I need to do.”
“Okay.” He narrowed his eyes. “Are you sure that you’re okay?”
“Yes, Max, I’m fine.”
I sat down in the chair in front of the computer and opened a search page. I began searching my name, Max’s name, and every combination of our names together. There was a good amount of information in the search results, but nothing that was as personal as what I’d written in the journal. I grabbed my phone and walked toward the balcony.
“Max, I’m going to get some air.”
“Want company?” He looked up from his tablet.
“No, that’s okay. I’ll be back in a minute.”
As soon as I was alone on the balcony, I dialed Fiona’s number. I held my breath as I realized how late it was. I couldn’t wait until morning.
“Samantha? Is everything okay?”
“Yes, I’m so sorry to call you so late, but I think I left something important at the bar where we met today. Did the owner mention it? It was a journal.”
“No, he didn’t say anything and I didn’t see anything. I’m sure you can call him in the morning to double check.”
“Okay, yes.” I sighed and closed my eyes.
“Samantha, what was in the journal?”
“My life, Max’s life, way too much personal information. I have to get it back.”
“I’ll call Nick first thing in the morning and ask him about it. Are you sure you left it there?”
“I think it’s the only place I could have.” My blood ran cold as I recalled digging through my purse at the small shop. Was it possible that I took it out and left it on the counter? I cringed at the thought. That would mean that anyone could have it.
“I’m not sure, to be honest.”
“Try not to worry too much. It’ll turn up.”
I hung up the phone with a heavy feeling in my heart. Would it turn up? If it did, would it turn up in the wrong hands?
Chapter 9
As much as I tried, I couldn’t sleep. Every time I started to fall into slumber, I would remember the lost journal and wake up with a rush of heat in my cheeks. How would I ever explain this to Max?
I gave up on staying in bed and settled myself in front of the computer again. Through bleary eyes I tried to scour the Internet. If someone had posted something online about me, I was sure one of my fans would have come across it by now.
I didn’t find anything about my journal entries. What I did find were horror stories about people’s personal information being exposed.
I forced myself to leave the computer just as the sun rose. I grabbed my phone and stepped out onto the balcony again. As soon as I dialed Fiona’s number, she picked up.
“Sorry to bother you again. Did you have a chance to call Nick?”
“Yes, I did. I’m sorry, but he said that he didn’t find any notebooks. Are you sure you left it there?”
“No, I’m not.” I sighed and closed my eyes. “I guess I’m out of luck. Soon all of Dublin will know about my worries over Max and my desire to be more affectionate with him.”
“Oh, is that all? I thought there might be some explicit things in there.”
“Well, no, not exactly explicit.”
“Just take a breath, Samantha. Did you put your name in the journal?”
“No. No, I didn’t.”
“Okay, then if someone finds it, they won’t even know who it belongs to.”
“You don’t think so?”
“No, I don’t. Now don’t let this ruin your fun. There’s so much you and Max can enjoy today. Try to forget about it, okay? If it turns up at the pub, I’ll call you right away.”
“You’re right. I guess I overreacted. Thanks, Fiona.”
I hung up the phone and looked out at the sunrise. It wasn’t much of one, watered down by the thick clouds, but it was still beautiful. I reminded myself that I was in Dublin, and I needed to embrace my moment instead of focusing on a mistake. Maybe Max would find out, maybe he wouldn’t, but until then I could have a great time and so could he.
When I stepped back into the hotel room, Max stirred and looked over at me.
“Are you up early?”
“Not exactly.” I offered a short laugh.
“You never slept?” He sat up in the bed. “Are you sick?”
“No, I’m not sick. I just couldn’t seem to sleep. I guess I’m too excited to be here.”
“We can stay in bed for a while if you want. You need your rest.”
“No way, I’m ready to hit the town with you.”
“Hm.” He stretched and yawned. “I guess the snuggling will have to wait.” He climbed out of bed and made his way to the bathroom.
I dressed while I waited for him. With every piece of clothing I put on, I recognized that I was also feeling that way emotionally. I wanted to protect my thoughts and concerns from the eyes of others, just like I wanted to shield my body from the views of others. Something Fiona said struck a chord with me. Why was I so worried about what I’d written? My thoughts likely weren’t much different than any other woman’s in a relationship. Maybe this was a hint that I needed to be a little more free and open with my emotions.
Once we were off to explore Dublin for the day, it was pretty easy for me to forget about the missing journal. We toured some historical buildings that transported me back through time. I wondered what it might have been like for a woman to live during a time when women had very little freedom. I wouldn’t have had the option to marry or not in some cases, and certainly wouldn’t have been able to have a career.
“Look at this, Max.” I pointed out a Claddagh ring on display. “Isn’t it beautiful?”
“Yes, it is. I’ve always liked those.” He snapped a picture of it with his phone.
“Now who is the picture hound?” I grinned.
“I just want to remember it. Sometimes I forget about things so easily.” He paused and looked into my eyes. “I just want to make sure we don’t forget these experiences.”
“How could we?”
We left the building and started down the street toward a pub.
“Time goes by so fast, you know? It’s easy to believe that we’ll remember every little detail, but there are things that seemed so important to me at one time and now I barely remember why.” Max said.
“That’s true. I remember when the highlight of my day was folding laundry.”
“I remember that too.” He grinned. “I used to like to spend my time there with you.”
“Do you still like that, Max?”
“Of course I do.”
“I just feel like we’re always doing stuff I like. Isn’t there anything that you’d like to do?”
“I like historical things. I like museums.”
“Don’t be difficult, Max, you know what I mean.”
“Difficult?” He gasped. “Me?”
I raised an eyebrow. “I just want to be sure you’re happy.”
“I am, sweetheart.” He turned to face me. “I am. I just wish you wouldn’t worry so much.”
I bit into my bottom lip. There it was again—my insecurity rearing its ugly head. I really needed to find a way to get that under control.
I took a deep breath, determined to throw myself into the day.
Chapter 10
When we stepped into the pub I noticed that there was quite a crowd. We picked a spot as out of the way as possible, then sat down to eat.
When the waitress brought our menus, she wore a huge smile.
“Hi, I’m so glad to be your waitress today. What can I get you to eat?”
“I’d love whatever the special is.” I smiled in return. “I want to try somethi
ng new today.”
“Oh, great idea. Trying something new is a great way to spice up your life—and your relationship.” She winked at me.
My cheeks grew hot. One of the things I’d recently written about in my journal was my desire to try new things with Max. Was it possible that somehow this waitress knew this?
“Absolutely.” Max nodded. “Can’t let things get boring—not when there’s so much to explore. I’ll have what she’s having, please.”
The waitress nodded and walked away.
I looked across the table at Max.
“That was a little odd, wasn’t it?”
“What?” He looked away from the window and back to me.
“Just that she would say something like that to us.”
“I don’t think so. People seem more friendly and open here. Maybe she was just trying to make conversation.”
“Maybe.”
“Did it bother you?” He reached across the table and took my hand.
“No, not really.”
“You’re blushing.” He grinned.
“It’s not what you think.”
“No? Are things not…inventive enough for you?”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You know there are no problems in that department. I mean, unless you think so.”
“Not at all.” He gave my hand a light squeeze. “But you’re still blushing.”
“That’s because you’re asking me these things—with other people around.”
“They’re not concerned about our conversation. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, though.”
“I’m not. I’m just a little surprised. We don’t usually talk about things like that.”
“Maybe we should. I have a lot to say—trust me.”
“Really?”
“Sure. All good things. It just seems like you might be a little uneasy discussing details. I’d love to talk about what you might want to explore, but only if you want to.”
“I do. But not here.” I smiled. “Is that alright?”
“Sure.”
We shared a quick meal without much interruption from the waitress. But when she walked back over to clear the dishes she paused right beside me.
Sammy in Ireland (Single Wide Female Travels #5) Page 3