Sammy in Ireland (Single Wide Female Travels #5)

by Lillianna Blake

  “You too. We love your book and your blog.” The taller girl grinned. “So do most of the girls in our class.”

  “Really? You connect with the book?”

  “Oh, the book? No, not really.” The shorter girl shrugged. “No offense, but I’m not that into fiction. We love your blog the most.”

  “Oh, I see—I’m glad that you do.” I smiled.

  “It’s pretty well put together, right?” Max elbowed me.

  “Sure, it’s great,” she said, “but it’s the content that really counts. Every time I log in I feel like I’m living a little part of your life with you.”

  “I’m glad that it’s had that much of an impact on you. That means a lot to me.”

  “Girls, come help me get dinner ready. Sammy and Max, make yourselves at home.”

  Max gestured to an overstuffed couch.

  I sat down and he sat down beside me. In the quiet that surrounded us, I thought again about bringing up the topic of the journal.

  “Max, I think we need to talk about something.”

  “Maybe, but this might not be the time.” He tipped his head toward the two heads that poked out of the kitchen to spy on us in the living room.

  I smiled. “You’re right.” I laced my fingers through his and looked around at the living room. It had a very lived-in feel—from the marks on the walls to the wear in the carpet. I was certainly never one to be spic and span, but now I understood even more what those marks meant. It meant that life was too busy to keep up with tidiness. It meant that memories were being made instead of beds.

  That now all-too-familiar pang returned to my heart. Was this really something I wanted to miss out on?

  “Dinner is served!”

  We followed the delicious scent into the dining room. As Shauna promised, the Irish stew tasted far better than what we’d been served in the restaurants. In fact, there were elements of it that I didn’t quite recognize but was certain needed to be there, as the flavor that filled my mouth was amazing.

  “Fiona, have you ever considered moving to America?” Max looked across the table at her. “Because I don’t think I can live without this in my life.”

  “Sorry, Max, if you want my cooking you have to come see me.” She grinned.

  “Well, we might do some traveling.” I took another bite of the stew.

  “We might.” He looked over at me. “Or we might do other things.”

  I eyed him for a moment, unsure of what his comment meant. Luckily the girls began to argue about who’d made the better biscuits and whether Max would like them.

  In fact, most of the dinner conversation was the two teenagers biting back and forth at one another. I enjoyed their creative insults and careful wording to avoid their mother’s wrath.

  After we finished dinner, the girls herded us toward the door. “We have something to show you—that we think you’ll like.”

  Max and I followed after them. After a short walk we came upon a very large pond. It was filled with moss and fish that we could hear splashing in the distance.

  “It’s not anything spectacular, but it’s our favorite place in Ireland,” the eldest of the girls said.

  “It’s wonderful. Thank you for showing us.” I slipped my hand into Max’s.

  “Girls! Come in now!”

  I glanced back toward the house, where Fiona called from the front door.

  “Coming!” The two girls ran back toward the house.

  Chapter 30

  Max held my hand tight in his and looked into my eyes. “Can we stay here for a few minutes?”

  “Sure.” I leaned close to him. “I love these moments with you.”

  “So do I.”

  “They’re good girls, aren’t they? Sometimes I forget that teenagers can be just as sweet as young children.”

  “Yes, they can. Or they can be as wild as we were.”

  “I wasn’t wild!”

  “Maybe not, but you wanted to be.” He grinned.

  “I’m just saying, maybe the teenage years aren’t as bad as people claim.”

  “Maybe not.” He kissed my cheek.

  “You don’t want to talk about it, do you?”

  “About what? Teenagers?” He shook his head. “Not really.”

  “Max, I don’t want anything to create a barrier between us.”

  “Nothing ever could.” He pulled me close for a kiss.

  When I pulled away he stared into my eyes. “I read the journal. I didn’t want to write you back there. I wanted to speak to you about this face-to-face.”

  “You don’t have to really. I understand.”

  “No—clearly, you don’t.” He took both of my hands in his. “Sammy, I love everything about you. I want our lives to be rich and our experiences to be filled with love. Children would only add to that.”

  “Really? I thought you didn’t want—”

  “I want us to be together. I adore every little thing about you. How could I not want more of you in the world? A little Sammy, taking the world by storm, just like her mother does? I would never turn that down.”

  “Or a little Max, with a heart of gold, just like his daddy?” I smiled.

  “Oh boy, I don’t know if I can handle a little me. I know what I did to my mother.” Max grimaced, then laughed. “It’s our adventure, Sammy. We get to decide where it takes us. The way you described how you’re feeling made me realize that I feel that way too. I guess I just assumed our lives were settled—that you wouldn’t want to change that with children.”

  “Children?” I grinned. “How many?”

  “I think we’ll figure that out together. When you’re ready, I’m ready. Okay?” He drew my hand to his lips and kissed it.

  “But don’t you think it will change our lives too much? What about your freedom?”

  “I don’t need anything but you.”

  “My body would change and—”

  “Sammy.” He cupped my cheeks and gazed into my eyes. “No matter how your body changes, even when we’re buried in soiled diapers, even when there is absolutely no way that we think we’re going to make it, you are going to be the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. I never want you to worry about that. Understand?”

  I nodded and turned my lips into his palm. When I kissed it, I was reminded of just how safe I always felt with him. “I love you.”

  “I love you too, Sammy. You will be an amazing mother.” He winced. “Me, on the other hand, I might need just a little help in the daddy department.”

  “I think you’d be a natural.”

  “I guess we’ll find out—when we’re ready. We’ll talk about all of it after the book tour, alright?”

  “Yes.” I stared into his eyes and suddenly believed in leprechauns and magic again.

  Max was my pot of gold at the end of the rainbow—my treasure in life. He’d always been that for me, and I knew from listening to his sweet words that I was his treasure also.

  Dear Reader,

  The Single Wide Female and B.I.G. Girls Club books are written for every woman out there who has struggled with their weight, self-esteem and any number of issues that we all face as we work to become the best versions of ourselves that we can be.

  They are meant to be light-hearted and fun, but I do hope that they will inspire you—to REALLY live your life to the fullest, loving yourself completely as you do so.

  If you enjoy Sammy in Ireland, I’d appreciate it if you would take a moment to leave an honest review here:

  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01GSFAJSS

  And…

  I have a FREE book for you!

  Wanna know what inspired Sammy to write her bucket list? Visit my website below and get your complimentary copy of “Sammy’s Big Plan!”

  LilliannaBlake.com

  Enjoy!

  Sincerely,

  Lillianna

  P.S. Also be sure to see the previews following this page for introductions to additional series by Lillianna Blake.

/>   Coming Soon!

  Sammy in Thailand (Single Wide Female Travels, Book 6)

  To be notified, be sure you’re on the mailing list at LilliannaBlake.com

  Signing up for the free book there puts you on the mailing list.

  Please enjoy the following preview for

  To Love Again (Forty and Free, Book 1)

  Chapter 1

  Every wrinkle met its match with the firm pressure and glide of her palm. Even though there were very few wrinkles in the shirt, Nicole was determined to make sure that there were none. Her hand trembled as she swept it over the next wrinkle.

  How was she ever going to accept the idea that her children now had another mother in their lives?

  She glanced over at the suitcase beside her. It was piled up with more clothes than any ten-year-old girl could possibly need for a two-week trip. But Nicole needed for everything to be there. In the back of her mind, she recognized her attempt to prove that she was, and had always been, a good mother—but that didn’t stop her from smoothing out the last wrinkle.

  She set the folded shirt into the top of the suitcase and stood up from her daughter’s bed.

  So much had changed in the last year in unexpected ways. Perhaps—as some of her friends claimed—she should have seen it coming, but she didn’t. Divorce had hit her like a freight train and plowed right through her happily ever after.

  Only—if she was being honest with herself—it hadn’t been exactly happy, not towards the end, anyway.

  She walked out of her daughter’s room and picked up a pile of laundry that sat outside her twelve-year-old son’s door. She wanted to make sure that it was clean before she packed it. Since he seemed incapable of actually putting his clothes in his drawers these days, she just gathered all of the clothes from the floor to wash them.

  As she walked down the hall to the laundry room, framed photographs—hung exactly two inches apart—stared back at her. There was the photograph of her ex-husband, Jack, as he cradled Jordan the day he was born. Beside it, another photograph of Jack, with Melody in his arms.

  Once they were happy—she was sure of it.

  At the very top of the rows of photos was the wedding portrait. With eager smiles and much smaller waistlines, the shiny faces in the photograph looked foreign to her, as if they were people she’d never met.

  She reached up and loosened the frame from the hook on the wall. It wasn’t right to have it there—not when he was so obviously moving on.

  She dropped the laundry off and carried the photograph into her room—what used to be their room.

  The moment she sat down and sunk into the familiar give of the mattress, tears stung her eyes. She looked at the picture for a long moment. It was really over now. There was no special cement to put together what had broken many years before, and the fantasy that there might be was gone too.

  While Jack had been falling in love, she’d been struggling to deal with the notion of being forty-two and alone. While he was considering adding new babies to his life with his young bride, Nicole was thinking about menopause and whether or not to dye her blonde hair, which had began to sprout silver streaks of reality.

  Time marched on, and she didn’t know how to catch up.

  Before the tears could begin to flow down her cheeks, she took a deep breath and grabbed her cell phone from the charger on her bedside table. She logged into her new favorite website. It was a support group of sorts, but in reality it was a place for women to be honest—to talk about their fears and their joys, and, most of all, vent about life.

  Forty and Free was a website that she’d stumbled upon while attempting to figure out how to react to her divorce. She enjoyed the sisterhood that she felt there and the lively debates. As her heart ached, she typed out a message to post. It detailed her ex-husband’s destination wedding, how excited her kids were to be part of it, and how alone she felt because of it.

  When she posted it, she prepared herself for whatever responses she’d get. Within seconds she had messages of support from an assortment of women. What heartened her was the fact that these women weren’t all moms or all newly divorced. Some had been divorced more than once, some had been with their husbands from the time they were in high school and some had never been married. Everyone had their own view of what a relationship should be and no one was shy about sharing it.

  As Nicole sorted through the responses, she received an alert about a private message from one of the women she’d became close friends with, Ella.

  Cielo Spa & Resort! Trust me. Book yourself a room and have some fun. You owe it to yourself to get out of this rut, and see what the world has to offer. It’s the perfect time—with the kids away—to get to know yourself again.

  Ella’s words impacted Nicole more than she would have expected. She typed a quick response to thank her friend and let her know that she would consider it, then she logged out.

  Each message of support reminded her that her life was not over.

  Just like Jack, she needed to find a way to move forward. She picked up the wedding photograph and carried it over to her dresser. With one last look she shoved it into the bottom drawer.

  “That’s enough—enough tears, enough questions—just enough.” She closed the drawer and returned to the laundry room to get the load started.

  No, it wouldn’t be easy, but she was ready to live again.

  There had once been a time in her life when there were more important things than laundry and a broken dishwasher. A spark of eagerness drew a smile to her lips. Like an old but treasured friend, her desire began to resurface.

  For many years the only question in her mind was about what she could do for everyone else in her life. She’d trained herself not to think about what she might be missing out on, or how she might prefer things to be. It didn’t matter what she wanted, as long as her husband and kids were happy.

  That method hadn’t worked out very well. She’d sacrificed her needs, and in the end, her husband wasn’t happy. The family life that she’d expected to have had crumbled, no matter how hard she had tried to hold it together.

  What was left was a lonely soul—long overdue for some real fun.

  Chapter 2

  Gavin Bell leaned forward in his chair so that his elbows rested on his desk while he spoke into the phone. “You’re not making sense to me, that’s all I’m saying. What I’m offering you here is a golden opportunity to launch your brand in a way that will get the attention of modern consumers. I understand that you promote tradition, and I assure you that we can create a mixture of tradition and modernization that will retain your current customer base as well as gain the attention of many other demographics. So what’s to lose?”

  He pressed the phone closer to his ear and leaned back in his chair. As he listened to his client describe his apprehension, he smiled. He loved a challenge, and more than that, he loved creating solutions. Every time a client gave him a reason to turn down an offer, he enjoyed solving the problem.

  “I hear you, I do. And that’s important to you too, isn’t it? If you agree to this deal, you have Gavin Bell on your side. I respect how passionate you are about your brand, which is why I intend to walk you through every step of the process. You will have a say in everything—before the posters go up, before the commercials get made, before the actors are even hired. This is your baby and I get that. All I want to do is dress it up a bit for you.”

  He looked up at his computer screen for a quick review of the client’s information. He always kept personal notes about the clients on hand so that he could speak to them as friends rather than business associates.

  “Great, Ted. You’re making a wonderful decision, which I can promise you won’t regret. Thanks for taking the time to talk with me. I’ll have my assistant fax you all of the paperwork by the end of the day. Give my best to Karen and the kids.”

  He hung up the phone and pumped his other fist through the air in the same motion. The door to his office swung open an
d Lance Tavish stepped inside.

  “How did you get here so fast to congratulate me?”

  “I’m not here to congratulate you, Gavin.” Lance pushed the door shut.

  Gavin arched an eyebrow.

  Lance held his shoulders straight and his hands were tight at his sides.

  “What’s wrong? I just landed Ted Bramley. We’ve been trying to get him to agree to a new campaign for over a year.”

  “That’s great. It really is.” Lance narrowed his eyes. “But you’re not supposed to be here, are you?”

  Gavin rolled his eyes up toward the ceiling and sighed. “I know, I know. But Ted was only in the country for a few days and I wanted to catch him while he’s here so he can sign all the paperwork.”

  “There’s always an excuse, isn’t there, Gavin? I mean, there are people who would kill to have a boss that insisted they take a vacation.”

  “And there are just as many bosses that would be thrilled to have an employee as skilled and dedicated as me.” Gavin rested his hands on his desk. “Why are you trying to force me to do something that isn’t necessary?”

  “Because it is necessary. Because yes, you are my best asset, and I want to keep you for as long as I can. You’ve been going full tilt ever since you left Amy—”

  “—This isn’t about Amy.”

  “Yes, it is.” Lance grabbed a chair and pulled it up in front of Gavin’s desk. “I’ve watched you for the past five years. You’ve done nothing but work. You don’t even bring a date to the office party.”

  “So what?” Gavin cleared his throat. “I tried it once, it didn’t work out. I don’t see why that’s a problem.”

  “Because one of these days it’s going to catch up to you, Gavin. It’s going to hit you in the gut and knock you back. You’re not getting any younger, you know. You’re losing your hair and your trim waistline.”

  “Hey, I’m not losing my hair.” Gavin reached up and touched the waves of thick brown hair that rested on the top of his head. “Am I?”

  “Even if you’re not now, you will be soon. You’re forty-four, Gavin. You know what comes next?”