by Lilah Grey
“The repairs have been completed.”
“Phew,” I said, “I was getting a little worried that the entire thing might collapse.”
“Worry not, dear Cori,” James said, patting me on my head. “If there’s one thing that I take seriously, it’s the structural integrity of pillow forts. You’re in good hands.”
I rolled my eyes. “My hero.” And then I laughed. I never expected James to be such a dork, but I loved it. I loved the real him. I only hoped that it would last.
I’d been let down before; there was nothing in my past that I could draw on that would lead me to believe this time was any different. But as I looked into James’s eyes, as I reached out and wrapped my hand around his neck, kissing him, I didn’t care.
If hope was all I had, that was good enough.
Morning came and I found myself nestled against James. I burrowed my face into the crook of his shoulder and breathed in deeply. The spicy scent of his cologne still lingered on his skin.
“Morning, beautiful,” James said, groaning as he stretched.
My entire body fluttered. Beautiful.
“Morning,” I whispered, wrapping myself even tighter around James.
“Easy there.” James coughed. “That’s quite a grip you’ve got.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s fine,” he said, stroking the back of my head. I was so comfortable in James’s embrace that I found myself drifting back to sleep. I was dangling on the edge of unconsciousness when James said, “Fuck!”
His abruptness startled me. Before I had the chance to ask him what was the matter, he blurted out, “Rylee. We have a workout today.”
Both of us leapt to our feet, the fort collapsing around us as we struggled to find out way out.
“I’ll text her that I’m not feeling well. I’ll cancel. Shit, shit, shit! Where’s my phone?”
I found James’s pants, grabbed his phone, and tossed it to him. “Here,” I said.
While James texted Rylee, I went to work disassembling the fort and disposing of the remnants of our dinner.
When we finally finished, both of us heaved a sigh of relief.
“We should probably get out of here,” James said, breathing heavily. “She may still drop by if she missed my text.”
I checked my phone. If she did come, she’d be here in a few minutes. I didn’t want to leave, but I knew it was for the best. I’d have more time for James.
We left the building, hand in hand, and when we reached the point where we had to split off, both of us stopped.
James was still looking in front of him when he said, “This isn’t a one-time thing for me. I hope you feel the same.”
I let go of his hand and wrapped my arms around him.
“I do,” I said, speaking into his chest.
I pulled away, and he cupped my face, bending down to kiss me one last time.
The warmth of that kiss lasted all the way home. When I opened the door to my apartment, I stood face to face with a grinning Violet.
“Well, look who’s home!”
My stomach flipped, and I swallowed hard.
Oh no.
34
Corinne
“I told you to talk to him, not sleep with him,” Violet said, jabbing me in my side.
My face, neck, and chest felt as though I’d been baking in the sun for a day without sunscreen. I didn’t need to look in the mirror to know that I probably looked like an overripe tomato.
My lip was red and raw from my constant chewing, forcing my teeth to seek out another part of my mouth to chew on. I’d been picking at my fingernails, scratching imaginary itches all over my body, all the while Violet sat next to me, listening intently as I recounted everything that happened last night.
“I didn’t plan on it,” I insisted. “It just happened.”
Violet burst into laughter. “So his penis somehow magically slipped itself inside a condom and then into you?”
I snorted, imagining the scene unfolding in my head.
After finally settling down, Violet placed her hand on my leg. “I just want you to be careful, okay?” she said, rubbing my leg. “You’re like a sister to me. And I just don’t want to see you get hurt again.”
I turned and pulled Violet into a hug. “I’ll be careful. I promise.”
Violet offered a tight-lipped smile. She probably wanted to ask the same questions that had been swirling in my head: How is this going to work? How can you hide this? What if you get caught? How will your mother and stepfather respond? How will your team respond?
All those questions, among others, had left me uneasy. But each time that uneasiness began to spread, it disappeared as soon as James entered my thoughts. It didn’t matter if things were about to get more complicated or challenging, new obstacles blocking both of our paths. Together, I knew we’d make it through. Together, we could do anything.
“Well, he can’t be all that bad,” Violet said, pushing off the couch. “He did build you a pillow fort. And that’s kind of awesome.”
I laughed. “Yes it was.”
“So what’s it like having sex in a pillow fort?”
I groaned in response.
“Oh come on,” Violet said.
I stood up, my muscles stiff and sore from not only the game and my night with James, but also from sitting on that couch for so long. Violet and I must’ve been talking for a few hours at least. It was time for me to sleep. Long, relaxing, uninterrupted hours of sleep were in order.
No classes for me, today.
Unfortunately, that didn’t happen. A few minutes after I lay down on my bed, Violet ripped my covers away, dragged me out of bed, and force fed me coffee.
“You’re not missing class,” she said. “You’re going to Methods. The outline is due today.”
I sputtered, choking on my coffee. Oh. My. God. I’d completely forgotten about it. Violet had helped me with it earlier in the week, and I had planned to finish the last of it after the game, but that never happened.
Violet gaped at me. “You didn’t finish…”
I shrugged. “I was a little tied up.”
Violet’s eyes widened. “He didn’t use—Never mind.” She shook her head. “Talk with Dr. Collins. I’m sure you can get an extension. He’s really nice,” she added, blushing.
“I bet he is,” I said, winking at Violet.
Violet groaned as the legs of her chair scratched against the linoleum floor.
“I’ll be waiting in my room.”
I watched Violet scuttle toward the back of the apartment as I sipped my coffee, allowing my thoughts to drift back to last night and back to James.
“Nice shot,” James said, touching my arm lightly.
A chill ran up my spine as goosebumps erupted along my arms. It was the first time he’d touched me since last night, and the first time he’d spoken to me all practice. I was beginning to get nervous that he’d regretted what happened; I didn’t. That single touch and quick grin untangled the clump of nerves building inside me.
“Thanks,” I said, taking a long sip from my water bottle.
James folded his arms and went back to monitoring the scrimmage on the field, clueless to how much that simple gesture meant to me.
Practice went well. Even though I was exhausted beyond belief, I didn’t feel sluggish on the field. Just the sight of James was enough to get my adrenals pumping as though I’d chugged a triple shot of espresso.
Everything seemed to be working out. Dr. Collins gave me an extension on my outline. My mom had transferred funds into my account for rent without me having to beg.
My eyes drifted again to James, pacing up and down the sideline.
That man right there. That man is mine.
I bit down on my lip as I retraced every inch of his naked, perfect body in my mind. Everything faded around me as James became my singular focus.
“Not even hiding it now, are you?”
I turned my head and found Rylee’s scowling fa
ce staring back at me.
“I take it you two finally made up?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, shaking my head.
“Keep saying that.” She bumped into my shoulder as she walked by me. And then, after taking a few more steps, she looked back at me, sneering. “Everyone already knows.”
I racked my brain, trying to recount every interaction I had with James and whether there was some truth to what Rylee said. But after a few minutes, I stopped; Rylee was trying to make me paranoid. She’s mad about her suspension and wants to find some way into my head. No one thought that there was anything going on between James and me. I would’ve heard about it by now.
I tried to push it out of my mind, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that everyone was watching me. When James placed his hand on my shoulder after practice, I shrugged it off.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, scrunching his face.
I looked around. Most people had already left, and the ones who were still hanging around had their backs turned to us, deep in their own conversations.
I sighed. “I’m sorry. Rylee hinted that people thought there was something going on between us.”
James laughed. “Well, don’t you worry,” he said, placing his hand over his heart. “From this point forward, I will not lay a single finger on you.”
“Wha-buh—” I bumbled. “That wasn’t what I—” Why was he smiling at me like that?
“In public,” he finished, winking at me.
I pushed his arm, glaring at him. “You…”
James leaned in, his warm breath tickling my neck as he whispered, “Tonight, Cori. You belong to me.”
And there went my legs: a wobbling, trembling mess.
James dragged a single fingertip down my sternum, lower and lower. It circled my navel a few times, leaving a pleasurable tingling sensation in its wake. He dragged it back up my abdomen, across my chest, resting finally on my lips. I kissed his fingertip, and then his hand continued its journey to explore the rest of my body.
“You’re beautiful, Cori,” James breathed, his head resting in the crook of my shoulder. I could feel the warmth of his breath on my breast, its steady rhythm in sync with the rise and fall of my own breath.
“I could get used to all these compliments,” I said.
“You better,” he said, “because they’re not going to stop.”
I let out a light gasp as his hand cupped my breast.
“And I mean every one of them.”
My pulse quickened as the mass of James’s body, its muscled ridges and hard contours, rose above me as he straddled me. His thick cock pulsed and throbbed as it rested on my stomach.
I was still trying to wrap my head around how all of this happened. It wasn’t that long ago that I thought we were never going to speak again. I was so sure of it. But here we are: in his bedroom, in his apartment not far from my own, both of us with an insatiable appetite for each other.
I’d never felt these prolonged urges to be with another person before. I’d never felt such primal feelings, wanting to be taken again and again. It was exhilarating, as though I’d finally been given freedom after a life spent in shackles.
I could never go back. There could be no Corinne without James.
James trailed kisses down the length of my neck. Fine hairs stood on end as I felt a million little pinpricks across my skin. His tongue circled my nipple as one of his hands grabbed my wrist and pinned it against the mattress.
I grabbed the back of his head with my free hand as I let out raspy, labored breaths.
His lips tickled and teased me for what seemed like hours but could only be a few minutes. I tried to guide his head with my free hand, end the agony of anticipation, feel his lips on my aching center. Instead, he grabbed my last free hand, forcing it above my head to join the other.
“Not yet,” James said with a smirk. “I want to see you squirm.”
I twisted and turned under him, little squeaks of exertion escaping from my lips. I wasn’t going to break free, James was far too strong. I didn’t want to anyway. It turned me on being under James’s control, manipulating my body as he wished.
My teeth scraped along my lip as I stared into James’s pale green eyes.
“Fuck me,” I said, grinding against his leg.
“Not yet.” He grinned. “I’m not done playing with you.”
I writhed even more. He grabbed each of my wrists and then pulled them down to my sides, pinning them underneath me with one hand. Seconds later, he forced one of my legs to the side, and I felt his wet lips on my inner thigh.
I giggled as his stubble tickled my leg, but then the giggling caught in my throat. James’s tongue slid along my folds, tasting me hungrily. Everything seemed to fade as my mind tried to parse the overwhelming sensations that flooded through me.
“Fuck,” followed by a few guttural groans were all that could escape my lips.
My body shuddered and my muscled tensed as James continued, my orgasm building, deepening with every passing second. James had freed my hands, latching his onto my thighs as he tried to control my spastic convulsions. I gripped fistfuls of his hair, trying to control myself, but it was no use. Any control of my body was long gone. James was in the driver’s seat. James and the wonderful, masterful, expert mouth of—
“Oh, fuck!”
I could feel myself edging closer and closer to the cliff. A few more…
James stopped.
I gasped, trying to force his head back down. “Why did you stop? Why—” My ability to speak more than a few words was stripped from me as James slid his cock inside me.
“Oh, fuck. Oh…”
My eyes began to glaze over as my hands slid over every delicious ridge and valley of James’s abs. His hands held my legs firmly in place as he continued to thrust.
I bit down on my lip as I cupped my breasts. Beads of sweat formed along James’s brow, his mouth hanging open, breathing heavily. He reached down, wrapping a hand around the back of my neck, and pulled me towards him, our lips meeting once again.
I moaned in his mouth, feeling my orgasm building, throbbing, aching.
I clawed at his taut back, marking his skin with fresh, raw lines of red. I was losing control, yielding it to James. With very thrust, with every touch of his fingertips along my skin, I drew closer to the edge of my orgasm and sweet oblivion.
James’s palm engulfed one side of my face, his thumb grazing my lips.
“Corinne Olivia Crosley,” he said. “I love you.”
I could hardly breathe. A rush of adrenaline. Pleasure so pure that it neared pain emanated from my chest, spread to my core and through my limbs. I tried to say something, but only a heavy, breathy gasp came out as I my orgasm finally crested. Moments later, I felt James climax. His cock pulsed inside me. He tried to pull away but I wrapped my legs around his waist.
“No,” I said. “Not yet.”
He smiled, kissing me as the weight of him came down on me.
My chin rested on top of his shoulder.
“I love you, James” I whispered.
35
Corinne
Violet cleared her throat. “Uh, Cori?”
“Yes?” I said, my eyes glued to my text conversation with James. We had a free weekend coming up, so we were going to meet later tonight to figure out what we wanted to do. If we could keep our hands to ourselves for more than a few minutes…
Not that I’m complaining or anything.
Corinne: I’ll be in the library for—
“Corinne!” Violet yelled, grabbing my phone from my hands.
I lunged for my phone, but Violet pocketed it before I could reach across the table.
“What gives?” I said, blowing a stray tuft of hair off my face.
“You can have your phone back after we’re done with the first draft of your statement of purpose. The one you asked me to help you with. The one your mom wants to see next week.”
Viol
et pushed up her glasses, which had fallen low on the bridge of her nose.
“I’m not going to write it myself.” Violet sat back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest.
“I’m sorry.” I sighed. “I promise I will focus on my statement. I really do appreciate your help.”
My hands fidgeted while my feet bounced underneath the table.
“Could I have my phone back now?”
Violet laughed. “Seriously?”
“I just need to tell James one little thing. One text. I promise.”
“If you sit here and help me with this statement for fifteen minutes, I’ll allow you to dictate a message, and I’ll send it. Can you do that? Focus on something other than him for fifteen minutes?”
My limbs trembled like I was a drug addict entering withdrawal. I kind of was. I’d become addicted to James. There was hardly a moment I wasn’t with him, and during the times we were apart, I was thinking about him or texting or calling.
I couldn’t get enough of him, and right now, I needed my fix. I groaned and slid my chair, as well as my laptop, over to Violet. “Fine. Let’s do this.”
“So tell me, why would NYU be a good fit for you?”
Gag.
This was going to be a long night.
A few hours and a couple cups of coffee later, Violet and I were done with the first draft, and she finally relinquished my phone.
“That wasn’t so bad, right?” Violet chirped as we weaved our way out of the library’s labyrinthine stacks.
“Yeah…” I said. “Not bad.”
My eyes were glued to my phone, punching out a long string of text messages to James.
Violet laughed. “You’re hopeless.”
Eventually, after forcefully dragging Violet away from multiple shelves of books that caught her eye, we made it out of the library and into the cold, fall air. I’d never met someone more attracted books and libraries than Violet. Books, the good and the bad, held her attention better than any man could ever hope. It used to be that way with me and soccer. But then I met James…
Certain people can do that; they can enchant and mesmerize; they can evoke reactions and emotions so raw and intoxicating and pure that a single taste, a fleeting experience, was enough to question whether a life without them was a life worth living.