Bill Bailey's Daughter

by Catherine Cookson

  When the first clod of earth hit the coffin Fiona felt Sammy shudder and as she went to put her hand on his shoulder she noticed Bill’s arm come round it. Then one after the other the people dispersed until there was only the family left. And then they too moved away.

  They were nearing the chapel in front of which all the wreaths and flowers were displayed. And as they paused to look at them a man, who was passing, stopped, and Fiona said, ‘Hello, Rupert. It was nice of you to come.’

  ‘Hello, Fiona.’ He paused, then added, ‘I’m sorry he’s gone. I liked him. But who didn’t when they got to know him?’ He turned his eyes to the side now, and there standing not two feet away from her mother was Katie. He stared at her for a moment and she at him, and then he said, ‘Hello, Katie.’ And another moment passed before she answered simply, ‘Hello.’

  Bill now turned from viewing a large wreath that his men had sent and, stepping up to them, he said, ‘Hello there, Rupert. He was well represented, wasn’t he?’

  ‘He was indeed, Bill.’

  Bill gave a swift glance towards Katie, but her face was utterly blank.

  ‘Would…would you like to come back for a drink, Rupert?’ Fiona said.

  ‘Thank you, but…but I’ve got to get back to work—’ He nodded towards Bill, a half smile on his face now, then added, ‘or he’ll be asking what does he pay me for. But I’d like to pop in sometime if I may.’

  ‘You’ll be very welcome at any time.’

  ‘I’ll do that then. I’ll have a word now with Sammy. Be seeing you then.’ He nodded from one to the other, including Katie, then turned to where Sammy and Willie were looking at the wreaths. Bill, his voice low now, yet in a way light, said, ‘Well, let’s get home,’ and turned to Fiona, saying, ‘You take the womenfolk and I’ll take the men, the same as when we came.’

  And they walked out of the cemetery now and got into the cars, and fifteen minutes later they were getting out of the cars again and filing into the house.

  It was as they stood in the hall, taking their coats off, that Fiona noticed that Katie was standing apart. She hadn’t taken off her coat. She was standing stiffly staring towards Bill, and Fiona, in the act of taking Bill’s coat from him, made a motion with her head that caused him to turn round; and as he did so and looked at Katie standing, her head up, her mouth open, the tears came streaming down her face and, on a gasp, she cried, ‘I’m sorry, Dad. Oh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I am!’

  Quickly he went and put his arms about her and held her close, saying, ‘There! There! So am I, lass. So am I. Come on now, it’s all over. Come on into the drawing room and sit down.’

  Slowly she drew herself away from him. ‘I’ll…I’ll, go upstairs for a minute,’ she said. ‘I’ll be down directly. I’ll just…just tidy up.’ Then bending abruptly forward, she kissed him and ran from him up the stairs. And he, turning, first looked at Fiona, then at his mother-in-law, and said quietly, ‘Back to normal. Thank God for it. Back to normal.’ Then glancing towards the passage from where Bert had appeared carrying his son, followed by Nell holding Angela by one hand and Mamie by the other, Bill nodded, saying, ‘Family en masse.’ Then addressing Bert pointedly, he said, ‘You beat me to it. Couldn’t get home quick enough.’

  Bert now looked about him, saying, ‘Where’s Sammy?’

  It was Willie who answered, ‘He’s just gone upstairs. He’ll be down in a minute.’

  Sammy was coming out of the bathroom when he saw Katie running into her room; and he stood on the landing for a moment wiping his eyes; then walking slowly up to her door he knocked, and after what could have been a full minute she opened it. And she showed her surprise at seeing him standing there, but she said, ‘You want to see me, Sammy?’

  ‘Aye.’ He went past her and stood in the room and, looking up at her, because she was still taller than him, he said, ‘You liked me da, didn’t you?’

  ‘Yes. Yes, I was very fond of him…very. We…I mean, I could talk to him. We talked a lot.’

  ‘Aye, I know you did. And him and me talked a lot an’ all, and about you.’

  ‘About me?’ She dug her fingers into her chest; and he said, ‘Aye. And you know what?’ He gave a wan smile now, ‘He told me I had to talk to you.’

  ‘He told you that! Why?’

  ‘I don’t know except that you weren’t talkin’ to anybody these days, only to him. And he must have thought when he was gone you still wouldn’t talk to anybody, and I’d be better than nothing. But then I don’t suppose you will need me to talk to you now.’

  ‘But I will, Sammy. Yes, I will.’ Her voice was urgent now, her expression eager. ‘You know, you’re very like your da. You see, I’m even getting to talk like you.’

  ‘Eeh, you’d better not do that!’—their smiles mingled—‘else I’ll get me head in me hands and me brains to play with.’

  Her smile widened now as she said, ‘That’s exactly what your father would have said.’

  His face became straight; then his lips trembled for a moment before he said, ‘I mean to make something of meself ’cos that would have pleased him. But I’ll have to live a long time to repay everybody in this house for what they’ve done for me.’

  Her smile became a grin now as she said, ‘Well, you can start by talking to me and pay it off at so much an hour.’

  ‘Aye, that’s an idea.’

  They stared at each other in silence now, and when he slowly put his hand out she took it, and when he said, ‘I feel sort of lost,’ she said quietly, ‘I know the feeling, but it’ll pass.’

  ‘I’m gona miss me da. And you know something? He was a wise man and I never knew it until a short while ago.’

  ‘Well, I’ve got one over on you there because I found that out soon after he came into the house.’

  ‘You did?’

  ‘Yes.’

  Again they looked at each other in silence, then he said, ‘We’d better be getting down,’ and they turned together and went out of the room, and only became conscious that they were still holding hands when they neared the stairhead.

  As their hands dropped to their sides they laughed sheepishly, and it was Katie who said, ‘That would have given them something to get their teeth into, wouldn’t it?’ And when he answered, ‘By, aye, it would that, enough to get me thrown out!’ they again laughed before walking side by side like two people who knew they had discovered something in each other.

  The End