Sweet Invocation

by Arline Chase

  He laughed, brushed it back, and caught her to him, kissing her, taking his time at it, his tongue rubbing hers, warm and sweet.

  "Jamie...?” She breathed.

  "That,” he said, kissing her again, “...is for the pie. And this is for the shrimp my nose tells me is in there somewhere. And this,” he said, with one more kiss,” ... is for being the sexiest lady in the whole wide world."

  "The whole world?” Leanna laughed, pushed him away, then started sort out the groceries. “That covers a lot of ground."

  "Trust me.” He grinned. “I've done extensive research.” Jamie combed his hair with his fingers and refastened the thong. His gaze followed her movements as she began to wash greens for a salad.

  Leanna didn't like to think of Jamie with other women, though she knew there had been some—even before he went away. Whenever they went to dinner at the Inn, Marsha Atherton still hung on his arm and reminded him, with her eyes full of innuendo, how her house was the first one in Port LeClare with central air conditioning and how much he used to like coming in to cool off after mowing her lawn. There were others too, women her age and older, whose gazed followed him while they smiled secret smiles.

  None of them would have had him when he came back to Port LeClare, Leanna thought. Jamie had needed her then, to help him mend. He had needed her badly. But now he was fully recovered, lithe, fit, handsomer than ever. And getting restless? Yes, she could tell. Leanna felt the restlessness getting stronger in Jamie every day. If she loved him less, she might have failed to notice.

  "How was your day?” Leanna tossed the greens into a bowl and crumbled bits of feta cheese over them.

  "I had trouble with Darren again. Seems He'd rather play his own music than practice the pieces I assign—says they make his hands ache. And he's tired of the piano. And his mother wanted him to play for her guests and he isn't any trained monkey. And there are plenty of things more fun than taking silly old music lessons anyway.... “Jamie pinched off a bit of cheese and put it in his mouth. “I swear the little beast is a walking argument for making birth control retroactive."

  Leanna almost dropped the knife she was using to slice tomatoes, but Jamie wasn't paying attention. Instead he told her Darren's mother called later to ask why his lessons were so different from the ones her niece had from Miss Reynolds across town.

  "I'm sorry, what did you say?” Leanna looked up absently, aware that Jamie expected an answer, although she had heard nothing after his remark about birth control.

  "I said Darren Williams's mother is thinking of sending him to someone else for piano lessons. It's nail-biting time, Leanna."

  She read the real concern behind the off-hand words, reminded herself how often of late, Jamie hid his concerns behind sarcasm, jokes and flippant remarks. Was he worried because Darren Williams was his favorite student? Or because of the income he would lose if the boy's mother took him away?

  "You just said he was a little beast. Maybe you'd be better off without him."

  "Oh, but he's a talented little beast. If she sends him away to someone who won't show him that music demands discipline, then he'll never reach his full potential."

  Not knowing what to say, Leanna let the conversation drop and concentrated on her chores. She felt Jamie's gaze follow her as she moved around the kitchen, his smile of approval turning slowly into something that made his eyes gleam.

  Leanna's gaze met his for a moment, gave a hint of promise. Then she looked away, pretended she hadn't read his unspoken signal of desire.

  "Princess...?"

  The timer sounded and Leanna poured boiled shrimp into the colander. The rising steam made her cheeks pink and her hair curlier. “You're going to enjoy these."

  Gold glints of mischief glittered in Jamie's eyes. “I know something I'd like better.” He slid his arms around her waist and bent to kiss the nape of her neck.

  "Be serious.” Leanna shrugged away. “I'm in the middle of getting dinner."

  "I am serious.” Jamie turned her toward him, looking deep into her eyes.

  Leanna read a desire so intense that it made her catch her breath. An answering need began to burn inside her as Jamie scooped her into his arms and started for the stairs.

  "Damn, food. What I hunger for, is something a lot more vital."

  * * * *

  An hour later, Leanna stretched and snuggled closer against Jamie's chest. His hair spilled over her shoulder, onto the satin pillow slip. His breath was regular and even as the last golden rays of the setting sun touched his face. The light must have bothered him, for he brushed one hand across his eyes, then turned on his side.

  Fast asleep. That was Jamie. He made love with animal intensity, every atom of him charged with life. Afterward, he relaxed into a sleep so deep, that for half an hour nothing would wake him. She touched his back, running her hand over the silky smooth skin. He never would fill out into the beefy man she had once envisioned. His lean body looked muscular, strong, beautiful to her. The sun struck boldly from the white scar that curved from his left shoulder blade down and around to disappear in the hollow of his hip. Leanna ran her finger along it, tracing the line, across his ribs

  Jamie twitched, grunted, and rolled over, grabbing her hands and holding them away from him. “What do you think you're doing?"

  "Counting ribs. I didn't know you were ticklish.” Leanna grinned. “I thought you were dead to the world."

  Jamie laughed and kissed her, pulling her close against him. “Keep that up and I'll show you again how dead I am."

  Leanna pulled a hand free and ran her fingers through his hair. “I know you've recovered, Jamie, but I worry sometimes. You're still too thin."

  "Princess, this is as good as it's going to get. Comes of not getting enough to eat during the growth years."

  "Don't.” Leanna whispered, putting one hand to his lips. Then she kissed him again, pressed her naked body to his.

  Jamie held her away and shook his head, blonde hair falling across his shoulders. “Can't fool me with your diversionary tactics. You're just trying to distract me, now."

  "How could I possibly distract you, from whatever important business is on your mind?” Leanna kissed his chin, his chest, licked his breast, then wriggled one hand free and tickled his ribs again.

  Jamie hunched away, then sat up. “Don't kid me. You came home bearing shrimp and lemon meringue pie. It's pretty obvious you were buttering me up for something. But did I let you pamper me into a good mood, like any sensible husband? No. You looked too delectable. There you were with something important to say and I dragged you off to bed and loved the lights out of you.” Jamie sighed, twisted his hair back, and tied it again with the thong. “Princess, I don't know if I'll ever get the hang of this husband business."

  "You do all right.” Leanna smiled, pulled him down beside her again and touched his cheek. “You do better than all right."

  Jamie didn't smile back. Instead he said, “Go ahead and say it."

  How could she tell him? Just blurt it out? I threw away my pills without telling you and now I'm pregnant? Leanna couldn't meet his gaze. “What?"

  "Whatever it is you're working up to—go ahead and say it, Leanna. What's wrong?” Jamie hunched forward, watching her face.

  "Nothing's—wrong.” Leanna looked away.

  Jamie waited. When it was apparent she wasn't going to say anything more, he sighed “Well, let's go down and salvage dinner, then. But one of these days, Princess, we are going to have a serious talk."

  * * * *

  Later that night, when Jamie slept, Leanna lay awake. Why hadn't she had the courage to tell him? To just open her mouth and say, “I'm pregnant.” There had been a time when she and Jamie could tell each other anything. They had been so close in that wonderful, terrible summer when Jamie worked for Malcolm. Where had all the honesty gone?

  Leanna drank in the sight of his lean body. How could she expect Jamie to understand her need to be a mother, when his own mother hadn't car
ed about him at all? At twenty-three he was probably far too young to think about a family. She had felt him slipping away from her, felt she was losing him, and wanted a part of him to keep forever. Would Jamie be able to understand? Or would he think the baby was a way to tie him to her, when he really wanted to go?

  Leanna sat up and hugged her knees, remembering with a shiver the way Jamie had looked when he came to help her with the groceries. He'd had that chin-stuck-out damn-your-eyes attitude that his face always got when something was bothering him and he tried to hide it. Jamie wasn't good at concealing things. Love, and everything else, showed in his eyes and on his face. He had worn that same look, the day he had almost fallen from the ladder, in that long-ago summer when they had shared their forbidden friendship.

  Chapter 4

  On that day she had watched the 15-year old Jamie begin painting the gingerbread trim around the eaves of the old brick house. He used a long aluminum extension ladder to reach the high gables and turrets that marked the third story attics. At mid-afternoon, Leanna made the usual pitcher of lemonade. A hot thirsty-looking Jamie climbed down and joined her on the bench under the willow tree.

  "You looked ready for a break.” Leanna smiled, poured. He reached for his glass with a hand that trembled.

  "Thanks.” Jamie drained the glass and held it out again, his hand even more unsteady as she poured again. Yes, there is definitely something wrong, she thought, watching him drink more slowly. In the shifting light of the willow shade, Leanna thought he looked tired. On closer inspection eyes lacked their usual golden spark and his skin seemed grainy.

  "Jamie, are you feeling all right?"

  "Sure. I'm fine."

  The half-defiant expression on his face told her he was lying. Leanna continued to stare as he finished the lemonade in silence. Usually they talked, about books, about music ... Leanna hadn't realized how seldom Malcolm talked to her, or how lonely she was, until Jamie had come into her life.

  "Jamie, don't you think—"

  "I'm not paid to think, Mrs. Boyd. I'm only paid to work.” Jamie got to his feet and stalked back to the foot of the ladder, his back stiff and straight.

  Now, he was angry. Jamie only called her Mrs. Boyd when wanted to remind her she was an employer instead of a friend. Leanna frowned after him. Jamie wasn't moving with his usual grace or energy either, Leanna noted as she followed him into the back yard.

  Jamie tucked his hair under a billed painter's cap, then, bucket and brush in hand, started to climb the forty foot aluminum ladder that gave even with his slight weight. Halfway up, Jamie swayed and clung to the rungs. Unaware that Leanna was watching, he leaned to one side, retched, and lost the lemonade on the ground. He wiped his forehead on his arm, spat, then began resolutely to climb again.

  "Jamie Mallory! You come down from there this instant! You are sick. I'm going to call your mother and ask her to pick you up. It's too far for you to walk home, when you're not feeling well."

  "Never mind calling. She's not home.” Jamie shifted the bucket, then started to climb again. After a few more feet, he stopped, swayed, and clung to the ladder, blinking his eyes as if he were dizzy.

  "Jamie, you come down here. Right now!.” Leanna stared at him, willing him to listen, not at all sure if he would. Finally, he began to descend and she breathed a sigh as his feet touched the ground. Relief made her bluster to hide how scared she had felt.

  "Jamie? Are you crazy? Climbing in the hot sun when you're sick. You could have had sun-stroke or something.” Leanna knew she was shouting, but she couldn't stop herself. “You might have fallen and killed yourself!"

  "Well, I didn't."

  Jamie ignored her, acted as if nothing was wrong. He knelt on the ground, cleaned the paint brushes and then stored everything neatly in the garage.

  Dumbstruck, Leanna followed, staring into Jamie's eyes and wishing she knew what to say. Finally, she could stand the silence between them no longer.

  "Please, tell me what's wrong?” She reached out and caught him by the shoulder, swinging him around to face her.

  "Don't touch me.” Jamie's eyes blazed with golden fire and his firm grip brushed her hand away. “I can't help what I feel for you and I can't promise—I know you think I'm just a kid with a crush, but I won't be responsible for what might happen if you—"

  "Jamie—don't.” Leanna licked dry lips. “You're hiding something. Tell me, please...."

  "I'm hiding nothing. The lemonade was too cold on an empty stomach—that's all."

  "Empty...?” Leanna's gray eyes widened and she remembered that Jamie hadn't carried the usual bag of sandwiches when he arrived that morning. “Didn't your mother pack your lunch? Where is your mother, anyway?"

  Jamie stared at the ground, shifted his weight from one foot to the other. Finally, he looked at her. “My mother left town more than two weeks ago. The possible number five took her to New Orleans to meet his family. They have big bucks, so she spent all of the rent and most of the grocery money on clothes to make a good impression. I'm not sick, I'm just weak, because I haven't had anything to eat in a couple of days."

  "A couple of days?"

  "Look, it's not the first time, all right? She'll be back tonight or tomorrow and if she and old Jerry-poo have tied the knot, we'll be eating steak for awhile.” Jamie shook his head and blinked, then took a deep breath and looked up at her. “You're right about the ladder, though. I shouldn't have tried to climb, when I felt dizzy."

  "You mean she just left you alone? A fifteen year old child, with nothing to eat?"

  "I'm not a child, whatever you may think.” Jamie's golden eyes glinted again as he looked at her with a wisdom far beyond his years. “And of course she left food for me. I just—used it up too fast. Look, it's no big deal. Haven't you ever missed a few meals?” Jamie pulled off the painter's cap, shook his hair free, then combed it with his fingers.

  No. Leanna had never missed a meal. Her parents had provided everything she needed and most of the things she wanted. They had attended to all her physical needs, but thought of her as a child, and not important enough to notice. Then they had died and she'd had no one at all, until she met Malcolm Boyd....

  "Oh, god!” Leanna looked at him, her eyes snapping with anger. “She just went off and left you? She's your mother. How can she be so irresponsible?"

  Jamie swung around, eyes narrowed with suspicion. “Look you're not going to do anything foolish, are you?"

  "Like what?"

  "Like calling child welfare, or something? Promise you won't, Leanna. They'd put me in a foster home or something and Lilah needs me to take care of her."

  "She's the mother! Did it ever dawn on you that she's supposed to be the one to take care of you?"

  "I told you—my mother does the best she can."

  "But wouldn't you be better off in a real home somewhere?"

  "Living with strangers and never seeing you again?” Jamie's voice choked with emotion. “No.... “He turned and started to walk away.

  "Jamie!” Leanna caught her lip between her teeth, hesitated, then said, “Come inside. Let me at least give you something to eat."

  * * * *

  On that long ago day, she had given him shrimp salad sandwiches and lemon meringue pie. Lying in bed beside him, Leanna remembered vividly how Jamie had fought to disguise the eagerness with which he ate. Tears of sympathy started to slide down her face and she turned away, hoping he wouldn't see. Jamie always noticed everything.

  Jamie was a man now, her husband, not the boy he had been many years ago, but the expression on his face was the same. Then, he had acted defiant because his mother failed to give him food. What had Leanna failed to provide, to make Jamie look so hurt?

  * * * *

  As the sky outside the window paled with first light, Leanna plumped up the pillow, and turned on her side, away from Jamie. Would memory never let her rest? He sighed, then curled behind her, drawing her hips firmly back against his belly where softness was stirring
into something else. One hand slid around to cup a breast. Leanna stretched, eased her hips back against the lean muscles of his stomach, against the growing hardness.

  Loving in the morning, in the light of day, on the spur of the moment, came as naturally to Jamie as breathing, but Leanna had felt shocked at first by the depth of his physical need. Marriage to Malcolm Boyd had left her pretty naive about normal relationships. Jamie had taught her almost everything about how to be a lover. Leanna smiled, remembering how that had pleased him and Sue Ellen Graves's comment about the “only rooster in the hen house” drifted through her mind.

  Jamie's breath blew soft against her ear. His lips moved gently, exploring the tender skin behind it. “You awake?” he murmured.

  "Sort of.” Leanna sighed, and turned onto her back.

  Jamie lay on his side, elbow outstretched, head propped on his right hand. His hair fell like an amber curtain between Leanna and the daylight showing pink through the window. She reached up to brush her fingers through it. Silk could have been no softer. “You're beautiful, Jamie Mallory."

  "You too.” His left hand stole across her still-flat stomach, lingering on the warm soft flesh above her womb, above the place where their baby was already growing. Leanna caught her breath at the thought. She had to tell him. Soon. Jamie smiled and bent his head to give her a long lingering kiss.

  "Keep that up and you won't get any breakfast."

  "It's early. There's plenty of time, Princess.” He kissed her again, then gasped as her fingers teased him. “Easy! You know I like it slow in the morning."

  Leanna did know. By now she knew everything he liked.

  * * * *

  They were late getting out of bed.

  "I'll cook while you get ready for work.” Jamie slid into his jeans and loped toward the stairs.

  Deciding that she would definitely tell him over breakfast, Leanna showered, dressed quickly in a pale cotton suit, and flicked a brush through her dark curls. When she hurried into the kitchen, Jamie was already pouring her coffee. His hair brushed her cheek as he bent to kiss her lightly, when she took her seat.