A Christmas Candle

by Katie Flynn

  Lily laughed. ‘I can remember being a gawky young girl positively praying for someone to ask me for a dance,’ she assured Eve. ‘And I haven’t noticed you being short of partners either. So is it a date? We’ll move the pigs, clean up, and go to the tea dance. Can you get a message to your Robin?’

  Eve pressed her hands on her hot cheeks. ‘I’ll manage somehow,’ she mumbled, suddenly aware that the relief of unburdening herself to Lily was very much with her still. She had a great deal of respect for the older girl and could not imagine her behaving in the fashion Chrissie had described. True to her promise, she determined to put the whole thing out of her mind, and after they had finished at Parker’s Place and were on their way back to the luxury of a bath it occurred to her that there was something else she wanted to ask her friend. As they entered the Close and ascended the stairs to their room she shot a sideways glance, pregnant with mischief, at her friend.

  ‘I’ve got another question for you,’ she said gaily. ‘You aren’t influenced by looks and I know you like him, so why don’t you go dancing with Hank?’

  ‘Because he’s never asked me,’ Lily said promptly. ‘I agree he’s a nice guy, but he’s just not interested in being anything but friends.’

  Eve’s eyebrows shot up until they nearly touched her hairline. ‘He’s never asked you?’ she said incredulously. ‘If so, he’s the only American airman who hasn’t. And why wait for an invitation? If I were your age I reckon I’d ask him myself.’

  ‘Nice girls wait to be asked,’ Lily said. ‘Fast girls may cut a man out from the herd, but I am not a fast girl. If Hank wants to dance with me there’s only one thing stopping him.’

  Once more Eve’s eyebrows climbed. ‘And what’s that?’ she asked suspiciously. ‘Don’t say he doesn’t like you, because I know he does. Does he prefer to dance with girls who aren’t as tall as you? But he likes you as a person and surely that’s more important. So come on, Lily, what’s stopping Hank asking you to dance?’

  Lily giggled. ‘He’s got two left feet,’ she said. ‘Have you ever seen him dancing? He simply has no sense of rhythm or anything. He’s certainly no Fred Astaire!’

  It was Eve’s turn to giggle. ‘Now you come to mention it he really doesn’t dance, does he? Once when we were doing the St Bernard’s Waltz and needed him to make up a set I remember he gave up after two or three attempts and sat it out, as they say.’

  ‘So now, Miss Nosy, you know why Hank doesn’t dance. I never knew him before his accident, when for all I know he might’ve danced as well as the next man.’ She looked hard at Eve. ‘He never talks about what happened, but it must have been much worse than he ever lets on. So don’t ask awkward questions, young woman, because you might not like the answers.’

  ‘Oh, poor Hank!’ Eve said, honestly dismayed. ‘Lily dear, I’m so sorry. I should never have asked. Please don’t let him know that I did, and in future I’ll keep my big mouth shut. Only you and he are my best friends – apart from Johnny, of course – and I couldn’t help thinking it would be rather nice if you got together.’

  ‘Well, now you know. And now, young woman, who’s going to have the first bath?’

  Eve had hoped to see Hank on her final morning in the Close because next to Lily she regarded Hank as her best friend in Norwich. It had been he who introduced her not only to the beauties of the city but also to a great many friendly and likeable people, including Robin Maddon. However, on the day of her departure a big raid was planned and Hank was determined to be flying his Liberator.

  ‘This may well be the last raid of the war,’ he had told her seriously. ‘And I intend to be a part of it.’

  The conversation had taken place whilst the three of them were sitting on the small chairs provided at the Samson and Hercules for those who were not dancing. Lily, seated between the other two, looked very hard at Hank.

  ‘I wish you didn’t have to go,’ she said slowly. ‘Surely you’ve done enough tours of duty? I know very well that you could have gone back stateside after your accident two years ago, but you’re still here. Why tempt fate?’

  Hank had shrugged. ‘It’s my decision,’ he said mildly. ‘When I start something I like to finish it. I can’t tell you where the raid will be heading, or what sort of resistance we’ll meet. All I can say is what we’ve been told ourselves; every available air crew has to be on the alert.’

  It was Lily’s turn to shrug. ‘Do as you please,’ she said rather pettishly. ‘My feelings don’t count, of course.’

  Hank had laughed and reached across the space between them to squeeze her hand. ‘Don’t you worry yourself about me, Lily; I’m like a cork, the sort that always bobs up to the surface just when you think I’ve gone for good. Let’s change the subject, shall we?’ He turned to Eve. ‘Well, honey? Have you enjoyed your break from routine? Lily tells me that she’s planning to visit you all at Drake’s Farm before too long.’ He gave a short bark of laughter. ‘I gather that things are a lot quieter in the depths of Devon than in Norfolk, and that Mr Faversham is a good deal easier to work for than Mr Parker.’

  Eve had begun to reply when Lily jumped to her feet and addressed herself to Hank. ‘Oh, you make me sick, Hank Ruskin. You talk of the war as if it were some sort of a game, which it most certainly is not. You’re like a foolish child, ignoring reality and thinking yourself invincible. Well you’re not! You’re just an ordinary guy caught up in extraordinary circumstances. And until you come to your senses and act like a man instead of a silly boy who doesn’t know any better you can find someone else to sit out dances with.’

  Eve’s mouth had dropped open and her eyes had rounded with horror. To be sure, she had only known Hank a couple of weeks, but she had known Lily much longer and had never heard her friend utter so much as one unkind word. Lily just wasn’t like that. She never got cross or lost her temper. She was gentle and thoughtful and until that moment Eve could not have imagined the older girl ever losing control. But when she looked up into Lily’s face she saw her eyes sparkling with anger and her cheeks pink with it. Instinctively, she also got to her feet.

  ‘Lily?’ she said uncertainly. ‘What’s the matter? What’s Hank said which has made you so cross?’

  She had expected a soft answer, but Lily whirled on her, her face still suffused with anger. ‘Don’t you see he doesn’t care what happens to him?’ She was almost shouting. ‘Well, if he’s got a death wish he ought to be in a mental institution and not in charge of an aeroplane. I’m going home; you can come with me if you like or you can stay here, I don’t care.’

  This was so unlike the Lily she knew that Eve’s jaw dropped again, but seeing other people staring she pulled herself together. ‘Was it something I said?’ she asked humbly. ‘Dear Lily, I didn’t mean to make you cross, and wherever you’re going I’ll come with you.’ She turned to Hank, who was still sitting on his chair, seemed unmoved by the scene which had just been enacted. ‘Did I say something wrong?’ she asked anxiously. ‘I can be awfully tactless …’

  ‘No one said anything wrong, except me, and all I can do is apologise,’ Hank said, though neither his face nor his voice looked at all repentant. In fact, Eve thought, he looked rather pleased with himself. Lily too, as she fished out the cloakroom ticket and gave it to one of the workers in exchange for their coats, appeared to have calmed down. She put her arm round Eve’s shoulders and gave her a hug. ‘I’m sorry, darling. It was nothing to do with you,’ she said reassuringly. ‘I just got into a state for no real reason. Do you want to sit out the rest of the dance, or shall we look for a taxi?’

  The three of them made for the exit and Hank took one of Eve’s small hands in his own large one and tucked one of Lily’s in his other arm. ‘You mustn’t worry about me, either of you,’ he said. ‘I’ll be fine. And as for death wishes …’ he turned to Lily and pinched her cheek, ‘you’re crazy as a coot if you think that. I wouldn’t risk life and limb of any one of my crew, I can promise you. I intend to take nine men out and
bring nine men home again.’ He smiled at her. ‘Should I apologise? Only I don’t quite know what I would be apologising for.’

  There was a short pause before Lily spoke. ‘I don’t know what came over me,’ she said in a small voice. ‘We all have a job to do in wartime, but everyone keeps telling us the conflict is nearly over and I suppose I thought you’d done your bit.’ She looked shyly up into Hank’s homely face. ‘Will you forgive me? I said things I didn’t mean and I’m heartily ashamed of myself. Please, Hank, can we forget every word I said? Because they weren’t my words, not really.’ She gave a tiny chuckle. ‘I bet you never thought you’d see me lose my temper. Well, now you know I’m just a shrew with a spiteful tongue which I have to be careful to keep under wraps. Oh, Hank, you’re the best friend I’ve ever had and it would break my heart to lose you. Say you forgive me! Say you’ll forget every word I uttered. Say … ah. Here’s a taxi with his flag down.’

  Hank smiled at Lily and raised a white eyebrow. ‘Forgive you? For what? Just get aboard that taxi, my woman. Isn’t that what they say round here?’

  As she lay in her small bed in the attic, Eve remembered how on her last evening in the Close she had realised that she could not wait to return to the life she loved.

  She had had a wonderful holiday, a real break from routine. She had met a great many people, some of whom she liked very much, Robin Maddon for one. At the tea dance he had promised to write to her and to come to the station the next day to see her off. He had even promised to spend his next leave at Drake’s Farm if they could put him up for a couple of nights, but as she had packed her suitcase Eve had thought that this promise was unlikely to be kept. Robin was kind and good-looking and obviously attracted to her, but she was several years younger than he, and once she got back to Devon she doubted that she would think of him as anything more than a pen pal. Her old life would take over and she would seldom think of the friends she had made in Norwich, though Lily of course was different. The bond between her and Eve was warm and strong and would never be forgotten. Furthermore, Eve had learned important lessons from the older girl. The realisation that it was character which counted, and not looks or charm, had made her see everything in a clearer light, and on the day she returned to Devonshire and stepped off the train in the familiar little station to see Johnny, Connie, Chrissie and Uncle Reg lining the platform, tears of joy had literally spurted from her eyes, making the waiting committee laugh.

  Eve gave a watery smile. ‘I’m crying for joy, not sorrow,’ she explained. ‘I had a lovely holiday, Lily made sure of that, but I was terribly homesick for Drake’s Farm and missed every single one of you.’ She glanced around her. ‘It’s been so long since I lived anywhere but Devon that it’s more my home – my real home – than that horrid London flat could ever be. Even if Chrissie and I could go back there, we wouldn’t want to. It’s odd, but somehow the farm has become our home and the flat seems to belong to Mummy and Daddy and have no connection with us. Did you bring the trap, Uncle Reg? It’ll be a bit of a squeeze, won’t it?’

  Uncle Reg led the way out of the station and pointed with a flourish at the vehicle which awaited them. ‘We brought the old hay wain, because since everyone wanted to meet the train we needed plenty of room,’ he explained. ‘Hop aboard, the lot of you; there’s a grand supper all laid out on the kitchen table to welcome our best girl home. All aboard? Off we go then.’

  Eve, squeezed between Connie and Johnny, had never felt happier. One glance at Johnny’s freckled face with the broad grin that revealed a chipped tooth was enough to tell her he regretted the way they had parted.

  ‘Are you all right?’ he asked. ‘Golly, we missed you! No one ever realised how much work you did, but Chrissie’s been a real help, never grumbling no matter what he was asked to do. Now tell us, did you have a good time? I reckon you met plenty of fellers all eager to take you dancing and show you the sights. Reckon you never gave us a thought once you settled in.’

  There was not much space even in the hay wain, but Eve swivelled round and gave Johnny a good old-fashioned glare.

  ‘You may be fickle, Johnny Durrell, but I’m not,’ she said severely. ‘I met lots of people, some nice, some nasty. There was one in particular, an American Liberator pilot called Hank. He was nice. I suppose we were friends, but other than that there was nobody to compare with my pals here.’

  ‘Well, if you say so, but a couple of letters came for you this morning. Auntie Bess wouldn’t let us open them so they’re waiting by your plate.’ Johnny scowled. ‘One of them has S.W.A.L.K. written on the back.’ He ground his teeth. ‘Bloody silly thing to write on an envelope, I thought. I was in two minds whether to chuck it on the fire, but Auntie Bess said you weren’t likely to take it seriously, not once you were back at Drake’s Farm.’

  Eve laughed. ‘Now I’m back nothing else matters,’ she said joyfully, recognising that the time had come to ask the question which had been uppermost in her mind since she left the Close. ‘Oh, Johnny, I missed your ugly mug so much. Have you missed me?’ She was watching his face as she spoke and saw the colour rise from the collar of his open shirt, but knowing Johnny – and she did know Johnny – she doubted very much whether he would put his feelings into words. However, he punched her shoulder rather hard, making her squeal in protest.

  ‘I missed you at milking time and when we were rounding up the cows at the end of the day,’ he admitted. ‘But now you’re back, and that’s all that matters.’

  When the hay wain drew up in the farmyard Eve was the first to climb down, though Chrissie came a close second, bubbling over with excitement at seeing his sister back on Drake’s Farm once more. Together they ran into the kitchen, where Eve flung her arms round Auntie Bess and kissed that lady’s florid pink cheek.

  ‘It’s so good to see you, Auntie Bess. I’ve missed you so dreadfully,’ she said. ‘Gosh, you’ve spirited up some jam and cream! I never had anything near so good in Norwich and can’t wait to sink my teeth into one of your gorgeous scones.’ She picked up the letter that had so outraged Johnny and ripped it open, scanning the contents swiftly. As she had guessed, it had come from Robin, and contained only the promise that he missed her and would write weekly to give her all the news he thought would interest her. ‘Well, nothing much has happened since I left,’ she said. ‘But I suppose it’s kindly meant, so I won’t throw it away until I’ve answered it.’

  As she picked up the second letter Chrissie gave a squeak of excitement. ‘That one isn’t just for you, it’s for me as well. I recognise the writing,’ he said triumphantly. ‘Is she coming to see us? It’s been ages since she visited the farm.’

  Reading, Eve shook her head, then looked sadly at Chrissie. ‘Oh, darling, I’m so sorry to be giving you bad news. Mummy’s boss has been posted to the north of Scotland and has asked her to go with him – apparently she’s the best secretary he’s ever had. She doesn’t say so, but I’m sure she’ll do her best to come and see us before she leaves.’ She smiled reassuringly at her small brother. ‘Look, Chrissie, the war will soon be over, and then we’ll be able to see Mummy whenever we want. We may even be able to go back to the flat; would you like that?’

  Chrissie’s lower lip trembled and his blue eyes filled with tears. ‘I don’t want to go back to the flat,’ he said sullenly. ‘Suppose one of those doodlebugs gets us? But I’m only staying with Auntie Bess until Mummy finds us somewhere nicer to live. I hate it here, Eve Armstrong, and I hate you!’

  Eve gasped. When Chrissie was in a temper she knew he said spiteful things which he did not really mean, but this seemed unusually bitter. After all, he had been nothing but a baby when they had left the flat, and Mummy had come to the farm so rarely that Eve had imagined his memories of her would be very hazy. It seemed she was wrong. She began to say, soothingly, that there was nowhere nicer than Drake’s Farm in the whole country, but Chrissie, his eyes still narrow with rage, turned on her and punched her in the side as hard as he could.

&nb
sp; ‘You!’ he exclaimed. ‘You don’t care what happens to Mummy, and she doesn’t care what happens to you. You don’t like her and she doesn’t like you, not even the tiniest bit. If she goes off to Scotland and you never see her again you’ll be quite happy.’ He glared defiantly up at her. ‘You’d like to live at Drake’s Farm for the rest of your life so long as you could see Daddy now and then. Well, I don’t care what happens to you and Daddy. It’s Mummy who matters to me.’

  Uncle Reg leaned across the table and caught hold of Chrissie’s clenched fist. ‘I think you’d best unsay those remarks,’ he said quietly. ‘I know you’re disappointed because your mother is going to be a long way away for a while, but that’s no reason to insult folk who’ve done their best to make you feel at home. I thought you loved the farm and were happy staying here. Well, perhaps I’m wrong. Perhaps you would really prefer to go to the wilds of northern Scotland to be with your mum. If so, I can arrange for that to happen tomorrow. How would that suit you? Eve wouldn’t go with you, of course, because we need her here on the farm, but after the things you’ve just said – if you meant ’em – I don’t s’pose that would bother you.’

  For a moment Chrissie just stared around the table, as though looking for support. Then he burst into tears, jumped off his chair and cast himself on to Auntie Bess’s lap, burying his face on her ample bosom and flinging his arms round her neck.

  ‘I didn’t mean it, I truly didn’t mean any of it,’ he cried. ‘Drake’s Farm is the loveliest place in the whole world, and I wouldn’t change it even if I could. I don’t want to go to Scotland, but oh, it’s such a long time since I’ve seen Mummy, and now she’s going so far away from me and maybe I’ll never see her again.’

  Auntie Bess kissed the top of his curly head and stood him down beside her. ‘For a little ’un you’ve a rare nasty tongue,’ she said with a chuckle, although Eve thought her eyes looked suspiciously bright. ‘You’ve insulted every single person sitting round this table without any cause. You say your mummy doesn’t love Eve, but how do you know that? After all, when she comes to visit it’s as much to see Eve as it is to see you, Chrissie. And saying you hate it here isn’t very kind to Uncle Reg and me, is it?’