Controlling Darkness (The Control Series Book 4)

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Controlling Darkness (The Control Series Book 4) Page 16

by Anna Edwards

“No, you just proved you are mortal after all. I think I like you better for it.”

  James put his foot down on the accelerator and weaved through the traffic. Eventually he pulled into Kensington Park and put the car in neutral.

  "What are you going to do about it?"

  "What do you mean?"

  "That girl is barely holding on. She doesn't even know if you are alive or dead. She put all her trust in you, and you shut the door to her. You're her Dom for god's sake. You may have broken the link between you forever."

  Matthew shrugged. "I should have known I wouldn't get any sympathy from you."

  "You’re lucky I'm not kicking your arse for what you did. I understand that you got messed up but we talk through these things. You hurt me as well, man, disappearing like that. Come on. We are like brothers."

  During his time away, Matthew had wallowed in guilt. He’d never loved Beth, not as much as he loved Sonia. When he saw Beth stabbing Sonia, and her lifeless body fall to the floor, it had destroyed something within him. At that moment in time he felt failure, like he had not protected the greatest person in his life. The one that had made him the man he was. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't think straight. All his brain had told him was to run.

  As time had gone on, he knew Sonia would be angry at him, and he found it harder and harder to return. But he had to see her. He had to know how she was. Had he deliberately made himself visible to James so that he could end the nightmare of his own making?

  He smelt like a bloody whiskey distillery, he couldn't remember the last time he had shaved. He was turning into the man of Sonia's nightmare. The man that he had helped her see wasn't a demon but weak. Weak, that was exactly what he was.

  "I know it doesn't help, but I'm sorry."

  "You're coming back?"

  "I guess that depends on Sonia. I'm not going to make her life more difficult. She loves this job, and if she doesn't want me in her life, I'm not going to take it away from her. I'll make sure you are adequately covered though."

  "That sounds like you are giving up and not even going to fight for the woman."

  "I honestly don't know if I can fight for her. I did the one thing I promised I would never do to her."

  "How far are you prepared to go to try?"

  "Why?"

  "Because I have a plan."

  Matthew shifted uncomfortably in his seat. That expression on his boss's face could be scary. He didn't make billions without being a genius at the art of manipulation.

  "Are you going to let me into this plan?"

  "Soon. All you need to know for now is to be at the club on Thursday

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  Sonia

  The bustier looked all wrong. With Matthew, he always adjusted it so it showed off her breasts to the best her athletic body could show them. When she put it on, it just looked wrong.

  Jesus, why was she even going to the club with James. Would he expect her to scene with him? Maybe they should scene together. It would give them both the dominant/submissive pleasure they needed.

  This was just crazy.

  Matthew was just a man. One man.

  And she missed him so much. The bedroom seemed so big without him. Argh! She needed to get a grip. She was one of those wimpy women she always vowed she wouldn't be. She was going to go to the club with James, and if he wouldn't scene with her, then she would find someone who was willing. She was attractive if she kept her trousers on so nobody could see the scars. She flinched, Matthew would give her ten lashes with a whip for that thought. She was pretty; she was beautiful; she was so fucking sexy he nearly came in his pants when she walked into a room. It had all been lies. Great big fat, ugly lies. She picked up her bag and threw it at the door just as James opened it. It hit him square in the face.

  "Er...sorry." She bit her lip and looking guiltily at the floor.

  "No, I'm sorry. I was knocking for a while, and when you didn't answer, I got worried. I shouldn't have barged in."

  She'd been so lost in her thoughts that she hadn't even heard him.

  "It's ok, I'm..."

  "Do I need to give you ten lashes like Matthew would for doubting you look good? I prefer blondes, as you know, but you look beautiful."

  "Do I really look alright?" She did a little twirl for him.

  "May I do something?"

  "What?"

  He went to her cupboard and pulled out a short skirt. It was frilly, teal and black lace. Matthew had brought it for her. It was her favourite. Why did he have to pick that out?

  "I want you to wear this."

  "Boss." She hesitated, her hand over the skirt.

  "Tonight you will call me James or Master when in the club. I'm not your boss. If you want to scene, and you cannot find a partner, which will not happen, then we can discuss it. We will have certain proviso's put in for both of us to ensure we’re happy."

  "Do I have to wear the skirt?" "You don't have to, but I honestly think it suits you."

  "Ok, I'll wear it."

  She changed, and they headed for the club.

  She stopped by a scene of a St Andrew's cross and flogger. She and Matthew had once scened on this spot. She watched the rhythmic motion of the whip and felt herself getting warm between her thighs. The memories swamped her. Her heart started to beat faster. She couldn't breathe. She shouldn't be here. She turned on her feet and headed for the door but slammed straight into a solid wall of masculine chest. The scent of him engulfed her, warm, spicy--Matthew.

  "Shh. Calm my sweetheart."

  That voice.

  Was she drunk? She pushed away from the familiar chest without even looking up to the face and began to run towards where she knew her boss was. But a booming voice echoed out silencing the whole club.

  "Sonia. On your knees." Her body jerked, and she found herself dropping onto the floor. "You will stay there until I tell you to get up."

  She shut her eyes trying to block out everything, but she could still feel the heat of everyone's glare upon her.

  "Sonia." James' voice permeated her brain. "I need you to open your eyes and look in front of you."

  She opened one eye and saw the kind and reassuring face of her boss. Everybody else faded into the background but her boss.

  "He is gone. He left me to die."

  "You know that isn't true."

  "How can I know anything?"

  "Here in this place, we work our differences out differently."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Your Master did not protect you as he should. He did not respect you as he should. You have the right to punish him."

  "Punish him."

  "Here, on the club floor."

  "You're talking in riddles." She was so confused; she was a Sub; she didn't punish her Master did she?

  "Sonia."

  Matthew, her Matthew. He was alive, and he was here. He smiled at her, but it was a tentative one. He was nervous. He still had his arm in a sling, and he looked tired, but he was clean-shaven and seemed to bear little ill effects of the torture he suffered. Inside her, somewhere a burst of anger exploded, she had been stabbed, and he had run away like a coward. Jumping to her feet, she launched herself at him and sent a hit direct into his jaw. He staggered a few steps back as she wiggled her hand to try to get the pain now throbbing through it away. Damn, that man and his strong jaw.

  "Fuck, Fuck, Fuck."

  "Some ice," James called out, and the bartender was there in mere moments with a cold compress. Matthew stood back while James applied it.

  "I should hit you as well for setting me up."

  "Matthew will accept any punishment you chose to give him. I believe he once gave you a count of ten on this very floor for disobedience."

  "He needs more than ten." She huffed.

  "Then give it to him. Give him as many as you want. He will take it to prove he was a complete idiot. He wants to earn back your trust by placing himself in your hands."

  She looked over to where Matthew s
tood to rub his jaw.

  "I made the biggest mistake of my life running away. I broke the faith you had in me. This is the only way I think I can win it back."

  "I don't know if I want you in my life anymore. Did you even care if I was still alive?"

  "I received constant updates, but I became a chicken."

  "Why now?"

  "Because I realised the woman I was mourning for wasn't the one that was dead."

  She swallowed. His words hitting her hard.

  "Twenty."

  "Twenty. What whip?"

  She didn't know. She let Matthew choose them, generally. Whips were kind of his thing. Their thing.

  "I suggest this one." James handed her one from Matthew's bag. "It is lightweight for you to swing, so it does not injure your stomach. It will still punish him though."

  "He can't go on the cross with his arm."

  "The bench is free."

  The sea of people watching them parted and lined the way to the bench. Matthew had already started walking there.

  "Wait. Your shoulder. I can't do this."

  "I trust you to aim where you will not hurt me." He was back at her side and had taken her hand.

  "Amber." She said the word and then clasped her hands over her mouth. She was trusting him again. James stepped away and bowed his head reverently.

  "Why?"

  "I don't want to hurt you." It was the most honest answer she could ever give. "I know what it is like to hurt, and I don't want to do that to you." A tear fell from her eye. Matthew looked around and she saw James motion to a side room.

  "Come with me."

  She took his hand and followed him into the small room. It was the one in which he had taken her virginity. Her heart constricted as the memories of that night flooded back.

  "I still feel the moment you gave yourself to me every time I walk in this room."

  "Don't."

  "I'm sorry."

  "For the comment? Or for running away?"

  "Both. I have no excuse for what I did. I was a coward. I thought I'd failed you. I gave you my word I would always protect you, and when I saw you go down, I lost it."

  "You should know better than that. A knife wound won't stop me."

  "I was a complete fool."

  "Yes, you were. Are coming back?"

  "If you'll have me. James is pretty pissed off as well. I'm thinking you may be my boss now."

  "I like the sound of that."

  "Do you ever think you can forgive me?" Matthew fell to his knees before her. He looked so lost. He'd made a mistake, and he was grovelling for her forgiveness. Her tears were flowing freely now. He had let the darkness win at first, but then, in the end, he had controlled it and come back to her. She wasn't going to let her own darkness fester inside her. Matthew was her life; he was her future.

  "Kiss me." The words left her mouth as the weight of the last few weeks flowed with them. She was free. His lips didn't hesitate to press against hers, and she was home.

  He groaned. "I've missed that taste. It's uniquely you."

  "Matthew."

  "Yes, sweetheart."

  "Make love to me."

  “How is your stab wound?"

  "Healing. Yours?"

  "We might need to be a bit gentle on my arm. They had to pin it together."

  "Ouch."

  "Enough talk, Miss Anderson, more removal of your clothes please."

  Within seconds she was naked. Him close behind her. His lips were at her body, remarking every inch. He kissed over the knife wound.

  "Another scar." She sounded downbeat.

  "Another mark for me to worship as a part of you." He kissed her wound again before going higher to her breasts. His tongue swirling around the tips as they peaked to hard nubs. She lay back on the bed as he worshipped every inch of her. She had missed his touch so much. He completed her. They didn't speak, he just slid inside her. Home. He was home.

  Their eyes met. She held him in her gaze, and he thrust gently.

  "I can't promise you marriage and children. I'm still so scared of that."

  "I don't need them. I just need you and your love."

  "You have that forever."

  The heat started to build inside her.

  "I love you."

  "I love you too."

  The first wave of her orgasm hit her. She couldn't take her eyes of Matthew. The shaking of her body matched his when he let out an elongated groan of pleasure, and she felt him flood her insides with his seed.

  Home.

  The word just kept reverberating around in her head.

  "May I take you home Miss Anderson?" Matthew pulled out of her, she whimpered at the loss of his warmth. She wanted him back inside her for at least a week before she would allow him out of her bed. James had better not plan on needing them for a while.

  "You may Mr Sawyer, but first." A wicked grin spread across her face. "I do believe you owe me a count of twenty."

  EPILOUGE

  Marie and Callum’s Wedding

  Sonia looked around at everyone as they all watched Sally Bridgewater. What had their little group done to anger this woman? She was becoming a thorn in their sides. This time, however, she wasn't going to get a rise out of them.

  "She wasn't just known as Mrs Carter. She was also known as Mrs Durand, Matthew's wife, or should I say, Matthias Durand." Miss Bridgewater continued her diatribe. The intrepid reporter thought that she was pushing her buttons.

  "I believe a lot of that is classified information, Miss Bridgewater." Matthew stepped forward. He had his serious look on his face. He was ready to destroy the woman. Sonia was instantly back at his side. She linked her arm with his.

  "Your lawyers cleared this story?"

  "It was from a reliable source."

  "A reliable source that has been playing you." She gave a smug smile.

  "Pardon." The reporter didn't look so confident of herself now.

  Sonia pointed to the part which stated that Jennifer Durand or Beth Parks had died in an explosion at the La Font mansion. The woman had no idea.

  "Your source has given you misleading information. Either they don't know the full story, or they are wanting you to get sued for publishing misleading information."

  "I don't understand." Sally flustered under the gaze of the wedding party.

  "Matthew never killed his wife, she faked her own death."

  All eyes went to Matthew, and he nodded his agreement.

  "I thought for a long while it was my fault she died, but alas, I'm the innocent party. She was working for the other side."

  "You are making it all up to make yourself look better. You sent her into that building. You knew she wasn't coming back out."

  "I watched a woman I believed to be my wife walk into that building. What came out the other side was a monster." Matthew wrapped his arm around Sonia's waist.

  "And if you publish that story you will be posting information on a top secret MI5 mission. I believe that even you are aware of the implications of that for anyone still working undercover. I don't think your editor will be impressed. I see the headlines now. 'Reporter responsible for hundreds of women being sold into slavery; all because of some personal vendetta.' You will never work again."

  "Not with a formal complaint about harassment against my wife on your record as well." James stepped forward, Amy at his side.

  "Publish away, Miss Bridgewater. As you can see I have no secrets from my girlfriend or my boss, so your story will do little to harm me. I care not for what the public think. I didn't go into MI5 for that. I saved people during my time there. Yes, there may have been sacrifices, but people survived because of me. That is all that matters."

  Without a word, Miss Bridgewater turned on her heels and stomped off.

  "I'm proud of you." Sonia stood up on her toes to kiss Matthew.

  "People will always try to spoil love," Callum spoke this time, he had Marie in his arms and was kissing her.

  "Yes, it's ju
st jealousy on their part. I think Miss Bridgewater needs to get seriously laid and soon." Amy was kissing James in between all her words.

  "Talking about getting laid, I think it is about time I escorted my wife to the bedroom." Callum patted Marie on the backside.

  "Hey, not in front of my boss." Marie scolded her lover.

  "I think your boss is having similar ideas for his wife." Sonia looked over to Amy and James. James was well on his way to getting his hands under Amy's long dress.

  "We've got no child for the night. We are going to make the most of it. Besides we want to make another one." Amy smiled.

  "Amy, beautiful, they don't need those details."

  Both couples disappeared to their respective rooms.

  "Do you want another drink?" Matthew took hold of her hand and started to lead her back to the bar.

  "I'd rather something else?"

  "Something else?"

  She pulled on his hand till it rested on the cleft between her thighs.

  "Thank God for that. I thought you'd want me to dance till gone midnight. I've wanted you out of that dress all day." Matthew scooped her up into his arms and carried her at a rapid speed towards their bedroom. She couldn't stop laughing.

  "Matthew, put me down. I need to tell you something."

  "What." He did as she asked and searched her face for signs of anything being wrong. "What is the matter?"

  She took his hand again, but this time she placed it on her stomach.

  "I did a test this morning. I was late."

  "Late for what?" She chuckled. For such a smart man he looked thoroughly confused.

  "I'm pregnant."

  "Pregnant?"

  "Yes."

  He went silent.

  "How do you feel?"

  "I feel fine. I need to pee a lot, but it's still early days. I'd like to see a doctor soon, though. I want to check everything to give me peace of mind."

  "I'll get one arranged for tomorrow."

  "Matthew."

  "Yes."

  "Are you alright?"

  "You're pregnant."

  "Are you angry?"

  "Angry? Why would I be mad?"

  He dropped to his knees in front of her and started to roll the hem of her dress up so that her stomach was exposed. "I'm taking in the emotion of the moment."

 

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