Another Saturday Night and I Ain't Got No Body (A Page Turners Novel)

by Marts, Jennie

  “Thanks, Matt.”

  “No problem,” he answered around a mouthful of cookie. “The real issue here is when can I get a piece of that cake?”

  “I was just about to cut it.” Cassie took the cake knife she had sitting on the counter and sliced into the rich dark chocolate. She sliced several pieces and expertly slid them onto dessert plates as Piper retrieved the coffee pot and commenced refilling half-empty mugs. Matt took the plate with the largest piece and disappeared back into his den, and the women settled back around the table.

  “So, what I’m wondering,” Maggie said, licking the thick chocolate icing from the side of her fork, “is if you’re going to go out with Jeremy again?”

  “No,” Sunny said. “He did call on Sunday and left me a message to call him so he could explain. He seems like a great guy, but…”

  “But, what?” Cassie asked.

  “But a great guy to be friends with. I don’t think we have that chemistry. And then there’s the whole living with his mother thing.”

  “Well, I can solve that one.” Edna reached for her purse. “I’ll call Mabel and ask her.”

  She dug through her enormous handbag, piling assorted items on the table as she searched the depths of her purse as if hunting for buried treasure. A crossword puzzle book, a mini-umbrella, a stick of deodorant, a dog-eared romance novel, a can of pepper spray…her pile grew as she mumbled, “I know my ‘sale’ phone is in here somewhere.”

  “Edna, it’s called a ‘cell’ phone,” Piper corrected and peered into Edna’s bag, then tilted her head to get a better look at the cover of the romance novel. Flaming red hair spilled down the heroine’s back as her buxom chest heaved forth from a sheer peasant blouse. Her leg wrapped around the waist of a hunk of man-flesh dressed remarkably like a pirate. Evidently Sunny wasn’t the only one with a weakness for a good pirate romance.

  Cassie smacked Piper’s hand as she reached for the paperback.

  “Well, I call mine a ‘sale’ phone because I got a hundred and fifty dollar phone for nineteen ninety-nine with a new two year activation agreement. Ah-ha!” Edna triumphantly raised the little touch screen phone she had unearthed from the depths of her bag. Oswald whined as he stood on his hind legs and delicately nosed her purse as if she would next pull a delectable doggie treat from the bag.

  Always the sucker for brown eyes, Edna gave Oswald the remaining corner of the cookie left on her plate as she scrolled through the contacts and looked for Mabel’s number.

  “I’ll put her on speaker.” Edna touched the appropriate squares on her phone. Piper giggled as they listened to Mabel’s ringback tone of “I’m Bringing Sexy Back,” then Mabel’s cigarette-hardened scratchy voice stating, “This is Mabel and I could die any day now so if you’re bothering to leave a message, it better be important.”

  “Hey, you old bat,” Edna said loudly into the phone. “You couldn’t bring sexy back even if Justin Timberlake personally delivered you on a silver platter. Call me.”

  “Sorry, gals.” Edna touched the little screen to disconnect the call and lock the phone. She dropped the phone into her purse and scooped the piles from the table back into the bag. “I’ll let you know when I hear back from her.”

  “So, I guess I have a free weekend,” Sunny said, happily.

  “Not so fast,” Piper said. “I’ve got your next date set up for this Saturday.”

  “You’re kidding?” Sunny asked, a bite of cake halfway to her mouth.

  “I am not. Keep the day open on Saturday because you are going horse-back riding with a hot cowboy,” Piper instructed.

  “First of all, how do you know a hot cowboy, and how did you get him to agree to a blind date?” Sunny asked incredulously. They had included Piper in the original plan, but Sunny didn’t really think she would come up with a thirty-something blind date for her.

  “Just how hot is he?” Maggie asked.

  “Oh, he’s hot all right,” Cassie said and wiggled her eyebrows at Maggie. “Let’s just say boots, tight Wranglers, and a cowboy hat, and leave it at that.”

  “Let’s not leave it at that,” Sunny said. “Who is this guy, and since when do you know any cowboys, hot or otherwise?” She looked expectantly at Cassie.

  “He’s my riding instructor,” Piper explained. “I told him all about you, and he said he’s ‘intrigued’, so he wants to take you riding on Saturday.”

  “Oh, great. You told him I was intriguing? How am I gonna pull that off?” Sunny slumped back in her chair. “I’m the least intriguing person you know.”

  “Look, I checked him out at Piper’s last riding lesson,” Cassie said.

  Maggie laughed. “I bet you did.”

  “Not like that.” Cassie tossed cake crumbs across the table at Maggie. Oswald jumped up and licked the floor where the crumbs had fallen, his tail wagging in a cake-induced frenzy. “Well, okay, a little like that.” She giggled.

  “Well, I am intriguing,” Edna said, “and I love horses and hot cowboys. Can I come with you on this one, Sunny?”

  “You want to come with me on my blind date?” Sunny asked.

  “He’s not like a stalker cowboy,” Piper said. “He’s cool.”

  “I’ll be your back up,” Edna said. “I don’t know that you’re the best judge of character lately. I can be your voice of reason.”

  The table was silent for a moment as the women all looked at each other before breaking into hysterical laughter.

  “What?” Edna asked. She was the only one not laughing.

  “Why not?” Sunny said. “You can come along as my chaperone so I don’t get all crazy and jump the hot cowboy. What’s his name anyway?”

  “Levi.”

  “Of course it is,” Sunny said with a smile. She reached across the table and took Piper’s hand. “Thanks honey, I think a day spent learning to ride a horse sounds fun. I mean really, how hard can it be?”

  14

  The warm water sloshed as Sunny stepped from the tub and a lone pool of soapy bubbles meandered down her wet leg as she reached for a towel. Sunny smiled as she thought of the fun they had had earlier in the evening at Cassie’s, talking about books and boys, and eating chocolate. The bathroom clock read ten-thirty, and the worries of the book club, stalkers, and blind dates seemed to swirl down the drain with the diminishing bathwater. Beau stood up from where he had been curled in front of the door sleeping as she had soaked in the tub. He stretched, then padded over to lick the scented moisture droplets from her lower leg as she toweled dry.

  “Go on, Beau.” She shooed him and reached for one of the assorted bottles of lotion piled in a basket on the back of the toilet tank.

  Sunny smoothed layers of moisturizer into her arms and legs and breathed in the scent of ‘Moonlight Path’. She smeared Oil of Olay onto her face and dabbed a thick ivory wrinkle-reducing cream around her eyes.

  She pulled on her robe and felt the smooth satin adhere to the drops of moisture she had missed on her back. Reaching for the door, she heard her cell phone ring out the familiar strains of Beethoven’s Fleur de Lis.

  The cool night air rushed at her as she ran from the steamy warm bathroom across the hall to where the phone sat on the bedside table.

  The readout told her Jeremy was calling, and she wrapped the robe tighter around her waist and flipped the phone open.

  “Hey, Jeremy,” she answered hesitantly.

  “Hi, Sunny. I’m glad you’re home. I’m sorry to call so late. I just got home from work, but I really wanted to talk to you about the other night.”

  “That’s okay, I’m still up.” Sunny sat on the edge of the bed.

  “Listen, I know how things must have looked, but if you would have just let me explain instead of running off.”

  “Okay, go ahead and explain.”

  “I was as surprised to see my mom there as you were.”

  “Why? Is she not usually home on Saturday nights?”

  “Actually, she is usually home on Saturday nigh
ts, at her own home in LA.”

  “Her own home in LA?” Sunny repeated.

  “Yes, Sunny. My mom lives in Los Angeles. She came up for a spur of the moment business trip, and she usually stays with me when she’s in town. She hadn’t had time to call me and was beat from her trip, so she let herself in and went up to the spare room to crash.”

  “She stays with you at your house, that you own and live in by yourself?” Her voice squeaked a little on the word ‘yourself’.

  “Of course. I can see how it looked a little funny, but I haven’t lived with my mom since I was nineteen. If you would have stayed and let me explain, you could have met her.”

  “Jeremy, I’m so sorry I over-reacted. Now I’m embarrassed.”

  “It’s okay. I can understand how you got the wrong idea. As a matter of fact, my mom thought it was hilarious.”

  “Oh, great. Well, she sounds like a good sport. Is she still here?”

  Beau padded into the room and with a heavy sigh, plopped himself on the floor in front of the bed, his heavy hind end resting on her left foot.

  “No, she headed back to California this morning,” he said.

  “Jeremy, I’m really sorry again. I’m embarrassed I ran off, but it probably worked out better this way. I wouldn’t want us to have done something we regretted later just because we had some wine and a romantic fire going.”

  “You thought that was romantic?” he asked. “Good to know. That would help in case I have to suffer through some more of those Hugh Grant movies my mom left here last time she visited. But it doesn’t sound like I’ll be doing that with you, huh?”

  “No, I don’t think so. I think we would be better as friends. I’m really sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It’s not the first time I’ve heard the old ‘let’s be friends’ thing.” He laughed. “Seriously, I thought you were nice too, but I guess I’m looking for a little more as well.”

  “Okay. So I guess I’ll see you around then.”

  “Yeah, okay. Goodnight, Sunny.”

  “Goodnight.” She closed the phone and thought about Jeremy as she absently rubbed Beau’s furry back with her right foot. He was a cute guy, and he had seemed fun to be around.

  The phone rang again, and she absently flipped it open without checking the Caller ID readout. “Hello.”

  Sunny’s foot stopped in mid-stroke on Beau’s back as she heard the familiar silence on the other end of the line.

  “Who is this?” Her body was tense as Sunny strained to listen for a voice or any recognizable background noise. Her hair was still piled in a knot on top of her head, and a droplet of water slithered from a loose ringlet. It ran down her neck and between her breasts, and a deep shiver ran through Sunny’s every nerve.

  “I want you to quit calling me,” she stated firmly, remembering Maggie’s instructions. “Don’t ever call me again.”

  Sunny snapped the phone shut and tossed it away from her. It bounced twice on the bed and landed by the pillow as she concentrated on slowing her breathing.

  Suddenly, she felt Beau’s body tense under her foot. A low growl emanated from his throat. His head came up as he stared at the open bedroom window, and the sheer curtains blew inward with the night breeze.

  Nerves already on edge from the mysterious phone call, she now felt a fresh jolt of fear race through her. Sunny stared at the window, her body alert as she watched and listened for what had triggered Beau’s response. The light was on in the room, so the window only reflected her dark pink walls with the black night in the background.

  Sunny realized she was holding her breath. Forcing a loud exhale, she wiped sweaty palms down her robe. It’s fine. I’m fine. I was strong and told him to stop calling me. She sucked in a deep breath. Calm down. Beau growled again. A chill rippled down her spine. What was –?

  Oh, Lord help me! A large black-gloved hand reached through the curtains!

  Beau shot from the floor and flew at the window growling and barking.

  Sunny let loose a blood-curdling scream. The hand jerked back and disappeared.

  She sat frozen in place on the edge of the bed. Beau placed both of his front paws on the windowsill as he continued his frenzied barking. She thought she heard a scrambling across the shingles of the roof, but couldn’t be sure.

  Seconds passed as she continued to stare at the open window, then suddenly she heard a fierce pounding on the front door. She jumped and let out a shriek as Beau raced past her and ran down the stairs, now barking at the front door. She slowly got up from the bed and inched out the door toward the landing at the top of the stairs. Her legs felt as though they walked through molasses, her body stiff with terror.

  In the movies, the heroine would have grabbed for a weapon: a baseball bat, a tennis racket, even a lamp. But Sunny stood frozen and listened to the pounding on the door, mesmerized by the way the front door knob moved as someone furiously shook it.

  The pounding stopped and she heard a voice yell, “Sunny! Open up, it’s me, Jake! Sunny, are you okay?”

  Beau stopped barking and let out a whine. Her paralysis broke, and Sunny stumbled down the stairs, a sob escaping her throat as she reached the door. She fumbled with the deadbolt, pulled the door open, and flung herself into his arms.

  “My God, Sunny! Are you all right?” he asked, holding her firmly in his arms. “I heard you scream and Beau barking. What happened?” He tried to pull back to get a better look at her but her arms were locked tightly around him. Her legs turned to jelly.

  She sagged against him and he reached down to swing his arm under her legs to lift her up. He carried her to the sofa and sank down into the cushions, Sunny still cradled against his chest. He reached behind them, then she felt the softness of the sofa quilt as he pulled it around her, tucking her into a warm cocoon.

  “Geez, you’re shaking like a leaf.” He pulled her in tighter and rubbed her back.

  Sunny looked at him then and saw he was shirtless. His hair was rumpled as though he had been sleeping. Something about the start of the blond whiskers on the side of his face, and the way his eyes looked into hers with such worry and concern, sent a new kind of warmth through her that no quilt could accomplish.

  It dawned on her that she was naked beneath the little silk robe. She looked down to see that her robe had slid open so the full top of her left breast was exposed, the silk hem of the robe only being held up by the crest of her nipple.

  Sunny raised her eyes to see that Jake had now also noticed her exposed flesh, and the look of worry in his eyes dissolved into one of desire.

  Her arms curled tighter against his neck and her mouth found his. He pulled her close and she felt a deep stirring as her bare flesh pressed against his. His lips were everywhere as they kissed her mouth, her neck, and the top of her breasts. Her breath came in shallow gasps as her head dropped back, and she arched up, giving him a larger palette of exposed flesh to feast on.

  “Sunny! Sunny! My goodness, are you all right?”

  Jake and Sunny jerked apart as Edna’s voice came through the partially open front door. She pulled her robe together and pushed up from his lap as Edna barged into the house. She made quite a sight in her flowered robe and pink slippers as she stormed the entryway, a can of Mace in one hand, and a black Taser gun in the other.

  “Get away from her!” she yelled at Jake, wielding the Taser. “I am not afraid to use this!” She held her stance, but her eyes moved to Sunny. “Sunny, darlin’, are you okay?”

  “Edna, I’m okay.” Sunny went to her, her legs still wobbly, and threw her arms around the older woman.

  “I’m okay,” Sunny assured her again. “Jake came to help.”

  Edna looked from Sunny to Jake and back to Sunny again. Sunny nodded and Edna lowered her arms and dropped the can of Mace into the big terry cloth pocket on the front of her robe.

  “What the hell is going on, Sunny? I thought I heard you scream, and Beau was barking like you were being attacked. I would have been here soon
er, but I couldn’t find my damn gun, so I settled on this one and rushed over. Where did I leave that thing?” Edna muttered the last question more to herself, sticking her hand in the other pocket of her robe, as if her revolver might be hiding there.

  “Edna, I’m all right now. Jake came over because he heard me scream too.”

  Jake stood slowly from the sofa, and she saw that he hadn’t had any trouble finding his gun. The black metal handle stuck up conspicuously from the back of his jeans, and Sunny wondered how she had not felt that a moment ago during their embrace.

  He turned and slowly approached them, as Sunny’s eyes tracked from the gun at his back to the open top button of his jeans. The denim sides formed a vee against his tanned abs, and her legs suddenly didn’t seem quite as strong again.

  What is wrong with me? Someone tries to break into my house and I go crazy over Jake coming to my rescue and start making out with him! I must be in shock.

  Sunny reached for the back of the loveseat as her knees threatened to buckle, then Jake was there, his strong arm around her, holding her up and guiding her back to the sofa.

  “Well, what in the name of heaven were you screaming about?” Edna wanted to know. Her eyes were sharp. As Sunny looked up at her, she could tell Edna wasn’t missing much, from Jake’s bare chest, to his open button fly, to his arm around Sunny’s shoulders. “And what is Mr. No-Shirt doing over here with half his pants on?”

  Sunny’s face burned with shame, but Jake’s eyes were amused as he gave Edna an appraising look. Before he could respond, Sunny blurted out, “A man tried to come into my bedroom through my window.”

  Both of their heads shot back toward Sunny. Jake’s eyes went from amused to hard as he took in the whole room with one sweeping gaze.

  “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” He looked down at Sunny with exasperation. He headed for the front door, reaching behind him to pull the gun free. “You two stay here and lock this door. Don’t let anyone in until I come back.”

  He looked pointedly at Edna. “Keep an eye on her.” Then he was out the door, pulling it firmly shut behind him.