Given Enough Rope (Haunted Series Book 20)

by Alexie Aaron

  “Ira, yes! I think he’s going abroad for school this autumn and their semesters start late. Now Mason… Are you sure?”

  “I know he’s not typical PEEPs material, but he’s tough.”

  “Mouthy, like Dave. And a delinquent.”

  “I’ll keep an eye on him.”

  “If we are going to be in Chicago, we’re going to have to think about housing for the boys.”

  “Are your parents in town?”

  “No. I could ask to borrow their condo. And then there’s Mike’s place. I suppose we could work it in shifts. I’ll have to see if I can find a sitter in Chicago.”

  “Ralph…”

  “Brian would run circles around him. He’d be toast before the lever went down.”

  “And then there’s this place. Dieter is too young to be on his own.”

  “Domestic arrangements…” Burt mused.

  “How long do we have to figure this out?”

  “I’d like to get started a week from today,” Burt told her.

  “I’ll summon the troops. I’m thinking, this is an excellent time for Brian to visit Ted’s folks.”

  “He’s become quite a handful.”

  “It’s not that he’s a bad kid, but we have a child with the mind of a fourth grader stuck in the body of a toddler. I would welcome the terrible twos at this point.”

  “You seem to handle Ted…”

  “Burt Hicks!”

  Burt laughed whole-heartedly into the phone.

  “Are you finished?” Mia said, trying not to join in.

  “Yes. I have to call Mike and start arrangements on this end. Plan on a week away.”

  “Yes, sir,” Mia said and hung up.

  Ted leaned in the doorway. “Care to share?” he asked.

  “We have an investigation in a week.”

  “Are you going to be well enough?”

  “If I’m not, I’ll help you out in the command center.”

  “Who’s going to replace you?”

  “Possibly Ira Levisohn and Mason Callen.”

  “Ira’s still a child, and Mason’s a delinquent… Come to think of it, they are excellent replacements for you.”

  Mia lifted an eyebrow. “You’re not scoring any points right now, Teddy Bear.”

  “Sorry, Minnie Mouse, I couldn’t resist. Seems to me, we have some arrangements to make.”

  “Brian, Maggie, Dieter…”

  “Brian goes to my parents. It’s time that the Martins were reminded of what their genius IQs have created.”

  “I’d like to stay here,” Dieter asked, walking in the door. “Mark can come stay and…”

  “You’re both under age and no,” Mia said firmly.

  “What if we got one of the veterans to stay with us?”

  “He’d have to be hardier than the cook they sent us,” Mia said. “He didn’t last long.”

  “No one told him about Murphy,” Dieter reminded Mia.

  Mia looked at Ted.

  “Tell you what. Have Mrs. Leighton vet the best candidate. Make sure that he knows that this is a paranormal hotspot. Then have this gentleman come over, and we’ll interview him,” Ted said. “All of us.”

  “You mean Stephen too?” Dieter asked. “But he’ll be with you guys.”

  “Not all the time,” Mia said.

  Dieter was silent a moment and then nodded his head. “Okay, but what if he doesn’t work out?”

  “You get a babysitter.”

  “But I’m not a baby!” he protested.

  “I’m sorry, Dieter, but we have to be careful. Until your adoption goes through, I don’t want to chance anything happening,” Mia said firmly.

  “Yes, ma’am,” Dieter said and managed a weak smile.

  “If your veteran doesn’t work out, I’ll call and see if Ed and Judy will come for a week,” Mia said.

  Dieter’s expression changed. “I thought you were going to have Susan come and babysit. It’s not that I don’t like her. It’s just that I’m not a baby.”

  “Oh no, Bears season is starting up. Susan will be pretty busy,” Mia explained. “Speaking of football, how are tryouts going?” Mia asked.

  “Mark made JV, and they wanted me for Varsity, but I declined.”

  “Really?” Mia questioned.

  “I said I’d rather play JV my first year, and the coach said no - it was Varsity or nothing. I chose nothing.”

  “Does the JV coach know?” Ted asked.

  “I’m not sure. Why?”

  “It doesn’t make any sense to lose a good asset like you for Junior Varsity. Would you mind if I went and talked to them?” Ted asked.

  “Would you?”

  “I’m your dad. This is what dads do,” Ted said. “I can’t promise anything, but we do have to try.”

  Mia beamed with pride.

  Dieter left the room happy.

  “Shut the door, Teddy Bear, and lock it.”

  “I take it I scored some points,” Ted said huskily.

  “Mmmm and then some.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Lazar Popov drove his adapted jeep up the farmhouse drive. He parked at the end of the lot, ignoring the handicapped signage in front of the PEEPs office. He moved cautiously out of the driver’s side until he had his artificial leg firmly on the ground. He leaned in, grabbed his backpack and pulled it over one shoulder. Lazar closed the door and took a moment to check his hair in the side mirror before making his way past the office and up to the farmhouse. He had been briefed by Mrs. Leighton and Mark about what to expect from this eccentric household. He also took the time to talk one on one to Deputy Tom Braverman, who had gone to school with his cousin. Deputy Braverman was frank to point out that this job would be a challenge, but his mother found the Martins to be more than good employers - they were family.

  Lazar shifted his pack as he approached the front steps. He navigated the steps with ease. He stopped and looked around, sensing he wasn’t alone. The porch swing was moving back and forth, apparently on its own accord. Lazar lifted his hand and felt no wind. He cleared his voice. “I expect you’re the one they call Murphy,” he said.

  He heard the sound of metal scratching wood.

  “I’m here to interview for a job as…” Lazar stopped. “Actually, I’m not sure of my title. Mrs. Leighton mentioned that you needed another adult around here for a while.”

  Murphy slowly faded in.

  Lazar looked at Murphy.

  “How did you lose your leg?” Murphy asked.

  “Roadside bomb. How did you lose your life?”

  “A tree fell on me.”

  The front door opened. Lazar turned and saw a familiar face. Dieter stepped out and looked from the manifested Murphy to Lazar. “I see you’ve met Mr. Murphy.”

  “Not formally,” Lazar said.

  “Oh, forgive me. Lazar Popov, may I introduce Stephen Murphy.”

  Lazar reached out a hand, and Murphy got up and carefully took it in his. He could tell the man was nervous, but Lazar was honest with his fear, which Murphy appreciated.

  “Mia is waiting for you in the kitchen,” Dieter said.

  “Lead the way.”

  Dieter opened and held the door. Lazar walked in, and Dieter craned his head out the door and said, “I like him. Do you?”

  Murphy smiled.

  Mia sat at the table with her leg propped up. It itched like mad, but she had been warned not to irritate the wound. She watched as a tall young man followed Dieter into the kitchen. Lazar’s Bulgarian parents’ genes had given him gentle dark features, with the exception of sharp brown eyes. She watched as he scanned the room before accepting the chair Dieter offered him.

  Dieter introduced Mia to Lazar. Lazar got up and reached across the table and shook her offered gloved hand.

  “You’ll have to excuse me. I’m healing and was told to take it easy.” Mia smiled kindly, her eyes locking with his.

  Lazar was momentarily lost for words, so he sat down and rummaged
through his backpack and produced his DD214 and the resume Mrs. Leighton helped him put together. He slid them over to Mia.

  “I’m sorry, what is this for?” Mia asked, holding up the military paper.

  “It’s proof that I have honorably left the service of our country,” he explained.

  “Oh. K.” Mia looked at the resume a moment and then addressed him, “We have a very odd household. If you spent any time in the village, you would have heard rumors about us, me in particular. I have certain gifts that make the best of people nervous at times. I wear gloves to temper my sixth sense. I can and have used telepathy and telekinesis when called for. I would not ever read your mind without your permission. I have very strange friends and family. Stay here long enough and you’ll look at the world a bit differently. That reminds me, Dieter, you still have a jar full of souls on your bedroom shelf.”

  “I’ve been waiting for the light, but no sign of it.”

  “Maybe I should have Father Santos stop by.”

  “I’d appreciate it. They are a noisy bunch,” Dieter said.

  Mia looked back at Lazar a moment as if she forgot why he was there. She smiled and continued with the interview, “My husband Ted and friend Cid are kind of mad scientists when we’re not investigating paranormal things. My son Brian is very advanced and will talk you into an early grave if you let him. My son Dieter has special gifts too. And only God knows what the son I’m carrying will be gifted with. In short, we aren’t a normal, structured household.”

  “Mrs. Leighton briefed me on some of the challenges I may face.”

  “Like Murphy. He is a practical joker at times and is fiercely loyal to this family,” Mia warned. “If you make friends with him, he will be your friend for life, your life,” Mia clarified.

  “I met the gentleman outside when I arrived.”

  Mia smiled. “And you still came in. Mr. Popov, I’m impressed.”

  Lazar blushed.

  “What we need right now is someone to act as a responsible adult here at the farm when we’re gone next week. We ask you to live on site and drive Dieter to his practices. I will reimburse you for your driving expenses. You’ll have to prepare meals for you, Dieter and Maggie. She eats dogfood but is happiest when the bacon is flowing. This job could open up into a fulltime position depending on whether you want to stay. I’m a horrible cook, and Cid, who takes care of this for us, will be traveling in the future.”

  “What would my position be?” Lazar asked.

  “Asylum keeper,” Mike said from the doorway.

  Mia rolled her eyes. “Lazar, this is Mike Dupree. He’s a friend and is partners with my husband in PEEPs.”

  Mike walked over and pumped Lazar’s hand. “Would you mind if I asked you a few questions?”

  “Dupree…” Mia growled.

  Lazar took in the tension between the two. “I would be glad to answer anything that I am able to.”

  “What would you do if this place was attacked by foes?”

  “My first job is to protect Dieter. I would get him out of harm’s way and alert the proper authorities, depending on the foes.”

  “Supernatural foes,” Mike said icily.

  “I assume that Mrs. Martin would be the first person. If she were not available, I believe that Deputy Tom Braverman has had experience with the paranormal.”

  Mia smiled widely. She was impressed with the man. From his resume, he was in his mid-twenties, but his eyes were old. When Mia stared into them earlier, she couldn’t help but see the pain he dealt with every moment of his post-military life. Mia thought she could possibly ease his physical pain, but the trauma behind his injuries was beyond her experience.

  Mike nodded. “You’ll do.” He turned to Mia and asked, “Where is he going to sleep? Are you booting Cid out finally?”

  “Cid will always have a place here. I was thinking of making the conservatory into a housekeeper’s suite.”

  “So I would be a housekeeper?” Lazar asked.

  “Would you prefer wife?” Cid said, drying his feet on the rug at the back door. “That’s what the Martins call me. Hello, I’m Cid. Murphy sent me in to give you his axe-up. It’s like his thumbs-up,” he explained.

  “Where’s Ted?” Mia asked, craning her neck to see if he was lurking in the hallway.

  “He’s stuck.”

  “What do you mean stuck?” Mia asked.

  “Come and see,” Cid said.

  “Lazar, if you would excuse me,” Mia said, getting to her feet. “I’m sure I’ll only be a few minutes.”

  “Would you mind if I came along?”

  “Cid?”

  “Oh, I think if he’s going to join this household, he should see what happens here on a daily basis,” Cid replied.

  “You heard the man,” Dupree said.

  Cid whisked Mia off her feet. Lazar saw the ugly circular wound on her leg for the first time. He followed the others out the door and over to the barn. Inside, he stopped and followed the gaze of the others. There, pinned to the finished ceiling by two sets of long robot arms, was whom he assumed to be Theodore Martin.

  “Jake, what the hell?” Mia called out.

  The overhead speaker popped before they heard, “I can hack into the robot protocol program, but I’m not sure if they will lower him or squeeze the life out of him.”

  “That’s Jake,” Dieter explained. “He’s another ghost. He lives in the computer system. He’s also a PEEP.”

  “Teddy Bear, how did you end up plastered to the ceiling?” Mia asked.

  “I was instructing them on chasing cobwebs and asked them to lift me up, and they started using me as a dust mop and froze.”

  Lazar moved to the open shelving and pulled out a large canvas tarp. “Get the other end of this,” he said to Mike.

  Once the two had the canvas stretched out underneath Ted like a net, Mia forced the robot hands open with her mind. Ted fell safely into the canvas. He rolled out and got to his feet.

  “Thanks,” he said and walked over to the computer and began calculating. “I don’t know what went wrong…” he mumbled.

  Cid put Mia on her feet.

  “Mr. Popov, the job is yours if you want it,” she said.

  “This kind of thing goes on…”

  “All the time,” Mike said.

  “I would need two afternoons off a week for physical therapy,” Lazar said.

  “As long as you can work them around picking Dieter up from school.”

  “I can,” he said confidently.

  “The job is yours,” Mia said. “Do you have time today to go over your living arrangements?”

  “I do,” Lazar said.

  “Mia, you have to rest,” Ted said, turning around.

  “Dieter, why don’t you show him around the place, including the aerie. I’ll go rest and meet you in the conservatory in a…” she looked over at her husband.

  “In an hour,” Ted finished.

  Part of Mike wanted to pat Ted on the back for somehow getting control over Mia because she still didn’t look well enough to be on her feet. The other part didn’t like that Mia was listening to Ted.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Mia curled up on the couch in the living room. She didn’t want Cid to carry her upstairs where Brian was still taking his long nap, nor did she feel confident to make the trip herself. She wasn’t tired enough to fall asleep, so she lay there and looked up at the ceiling. The front door opened and quiet footsteps approached. Mike looked down at her.

  “I thought the meeting was scheduled for this afternoon. Was I wrong?” she asked.

  “No. I was working on some voice-overs in the office. I came in to cause trouble basically,” he admitted.

  “Mind keeping me company?” Mia asked.

  “I thought you’d never ask,” he said and walked around and drew up one of the wing chairs. He sat down and put his feet up on the coffee table. “I like this new guy. But he’s a bit too handsome for my comfort.”

  “
We’re not going to replace you with him, so calm down.”

  “I’m not talking about PEEPs. I’m just reasserting my claim. I get you when Ted blows himself up. From what I just saw, it could happen at any time.”

  “You want this bloated prego with half her leg hanging off? I think not.”

  “Mia, there is more to you besides a killer body. You may have a mind too.”

  “I may have a mind?” Mia asked through her clenched teeth.

  “What were you thinking cutting off your leg?” Mike asked, concerned.

  “Let’s say, I had no idea there was an archangel ready and willing to absorb the poison for me, and I had to save my child inside of me. What do you think I should have done?”

  “I see your point. It’s very easy for us to have opinions formed after the fact then during the event.”

  “All I could think about was stopping the poison from going any further and then saving Brian.”

  “You’re one hell of a mom.”

  “This is the Mia you should be thinking of. Not the demon-charged woman who would have used you and tossed you aside.”

  “So I was in the running…”

  Mia looked over at Mike and shook her head. “You’re a piece of work, Dupree.”

  “Yes, I am. What was hell like?”

  “Hell was the prison on the hill. I wasn’t technically in Hell. But I didn’t really feel good about being so close.”

  “Lucifer?”

  “Scary. Let me put it this way… How would you feel trying to make a deal with a Mafia crime boss? It had to be done, but I was this far from pissing myself the entire time. There was so much power there. I knew that I could be turned into molecule mush in milliseconds if he wished it.”

  “For me, this is all surreal. I have seen things I thought I’d never see in my lifetime. But you…”

  “I would trade with you anytime, Dupree.”

  “I wish I could make that happen for you, Mia. You deserve a simpler life.”

  “It wasn’t in the cards evidently,” Mia said. “How’s your mom?”

  “Crazy as usual. She’s moved into the new condo and is supervising the renovation of Roustan Rose. Ma’s in her element. She loves being in charge and bossing people around. The main contractor loves spicy old women, so the two get along.”