Falling Star

by Robert Rayner

  “That’s crazy.”

  “Right — but it’s true.”

  “It’s not my fault. Leave me alone.”

  “Why don’t you make me?”

  Edison stared at the lights at the end of the wharf.

  Steve jabbed him on the shoulder again. “Why don’t you make me?”

  Edison raised his elbow and swung around, catching Steve on the jaw. As Steve staggered backward, Edison turned and pushed him hard on the chest with both hands. Steve grabbed Edison as he fell and pulled him down with him, smashing his face against the boards of the wharf. Edison half raised himself. He thought his nose was bleeding, although it was hard to say if it was blood or rain running into his mouth. He felt Steve’s knee on his back, forcing him down. He lashed out with his arm, catching Steve on the side of the head, and squirmed free. He scrambled up.

  Heavy feet sounded on the wharf, approaching at a run.

  Edison rushed at Steve and they staggered backwards.

  “Jeez, guys. Knock it off.” It was Toby’s voice. “Guys, quit it!”

  Their feet hit the low board at the edge of the wharf and they flew into the air. The last thing Edison heard before he hit the water was Toby’s voice from above them.

  “Jeez, guys. Now what am I supposed to do?”

  9

  Shared Understanding

  “How are we going to get our clothes dry?” asked Steve. Edison, Steve, and Toby were in their Brunswick Valley School soccer outfits. They had changed into them as soon as they got back to the cabin. Their sodden clothes lay in a pile in the middle of the floor, and a trail of wet footprints led from the door to Toby’s bed where they sat. They had turned the heat up as high as it would go.

  “Let’s ask the girls,” said Toby. “They know about stuff like that.”

  “We can’t risk going round to their cabin,” said Steve. “We’re lucky we got back here without Mr. Field seeing us.”

  Edison and Steve had still been floundering from the shock of their fall into the frigid water when there had been a huge splash between them. Toby, standing up to his chest in water, had grabbed each of them by the collar, hauled them to their feet, and ordered, “No more fighting. And no drowning.”

  Edison had looked at Steve and said, “Jerk.” Steve said, “Freakin’ idiot.” Then, suddenly, they were laughing, all three of them, as Toby marched them to the shore beside the wharf and they scrambled up to the road.

  “I know how to ask the girls,” said Edison. He lay on the floor with his head beside the heater vent. He tapped, and spoke into it. “Is anyone awake in there?”

  There was no response. He tapped louder. “Anyone awake?”

  He heard a mutter of voices from next door. Then, a few seconds later, Julie’s voice said, “Go away.”

  Edison looked at Toby and Steve.

  Toby said, “Try again.”

  Edison tapped louder.

  “I said, go away.”

  Edison tapped louder still.

  “We’re asleep.”

  “No, you’re not.”

  “We were.”

  “Sorry.”

  “Bug off.”

  Edison tapped even louder.

  Julie swore — Edison was surprised at the word she used — and snapped, “Who is it?”

  “Edison.”

  “What do you want?”

  “Help.”

  “So? We’ve got a big game tomorrow, in case you’ve forgotten, and you might want to stay up all night but we’re trying to sleep …”

  “Tell her to shut up,” said Toby.

  Edison said, “Shut up and listen.”

  There was a pause, then, “Don’t tell me to shut up, you snot-nosed bonehead.”

  Edison looked at Toby and Steve. They were grinning.

  Toby whispered, “You should hear her when she gets mad.”

  Edison tried again, speaking more urgently. “We need help.”

  “What sort of help?’

  “Come round and we’ll tell you.”

  “You come round here.”

  “Can’t.”

  A few seconds later, after another murmuring of voices, Julie and Linh-Mai stole into the boys’ cabin. Linh-Mai was wearing Spiderman pajamas, and Julie had on a long T-shirt with a picture of a wrestler on the front. He had a square shaven head and a drooping moustache, and his open, snarling mouth revealed three missing teeth.

  “Nice sleepwear,” said Toby. “It’s clever how they can put your picture on your T-shirt, isn’t it?”

  Julie smacked him on the side of his head. She had been surveying the boys in their Brunswick Valley uniforms and said, “It’s a bit late for playing soccer, isn’t it?” Then her eyes fell on the pile of wet clothes. “What’s going on?”

  “We went swimming,” said Steve.

  “In your clothes,” said Julie.

  “We forgot to take them off,” said Toby.

  “And now you want us to get them dry,” said Linh-Mai. She looked at Julie. “Why are boys so useless?”

  She crept from the cabin and returned a few seconds later with two hair dryers.

  Julie said, “We’re not helping until you tell us what really happened.”

  While the boys held up their wet clothes and the girls wielded the dryers, Toby started, “Steve and Edison got into it.”

  “Why doesn’t that surprise me?” said Julie.

  “He started it,” said Steve. “Boasting about going to High Park …”

  “You’re the one that started on about High Park,” said Edison.

  “Don’t start again,” said Toby.

  Linh-Mai looked at Edison. “You’re going to High Park?”

  “Don’t know yet.”

  “’Course you know,” said Steve. “That’s the only reason you’re playing for us — just so you can show off when we play them.”

  Julie and Linh-Mai were looking at Edison.

  He gnawed at his lip. “My old coach at Canterbury recommended me to High Park,” he started.

  “That means he’s in,” said Steve.

  “Let him finish,” said Julie.

  “The High Park coach said I had to try out, but if I played for Brunswick Valley when they played High Park that could count as my trial.”

  “So he’s in,” said Steve.

  “Not unless I play better,” said Edison. He hung his head. “Right now I’m pathetic.”

  “If High Park had turned me down because I wasn’t good enough, I wouldn’t have minded,” said Steve bitterly. “But when it’s because of …” He stopped, shaking his head, and swore softly.

  Toby put his hand on Steve’s shoulder. “It’s not fair, about your dad and all,” he said. “But that’s not Edison’s fault.”

  Steve muttered, “I guess.” After a few seconds of silence, he said suddenly, looking at Edison, “You’ll be all right. You’ve just lost your nerve.”

  Edison looked up in surprise. “How did you know?”

  “Obvious, isn’t it? Don’t worry. You’ll get it back, all of a sudden. You just have to keep trying.”

  “What do you mean, he’s lost his nerve?” said Linh-Mai. “What’s he talking about, Edison?”

  “Like Steve says, I’ve lost my nerve,” said Edison. “You can’t play soccer — you can’t play any sport — if you’ve lost your nerve.”

  Julie and Linh-Mai and Toby were looking from Edison to Steve, their faces blank.

  Steve explained, “You have to, like, know that whatever you plan to do — shoot, or dribble, or whatever — you’re going to do.”

  “If you don’t believe it, you might as well not bother,” said Edison.

  Steve nodded.


  “How d’you mean?” asked Toby.

  “I mean, it takes nerve to try to play … like Steve and I do …” He was afraid of sounding conceited and spoke hesitantly. “Trying to dribble round defenders — that takes nerve. If you do a step-over, or a feint, or whatever, and you get past them, you look great, right? But when your stuff doesn’t work and they get the ball off you, then you just look stupid.”

  Linh-Mai interrupted, “No, you don’t.”

  “You do,” Steve insisted. “And trying a shot at goal — that takes nerve too.”

  “Can’t say I’ve ever tried it,” said Toby.

  “You’re a hero if you score,” said Edison. “But more likely the goalkeeper’s going to save …”

  “… Or someone’s going to block your shot,” said Steve.

  “… Or you miss,” said Edison.

  “So you end up looking a complete loser,” Steve concluded.

  “Not just a loser,” Edison added. “A cocky show-off loser.”

  Steve nodded again.

  “Jeez,” said Toby. “Missing a goal isn’t the end of the world.”

  “You guys are so totally heavy,” said Julie. “Lighten up, will you? We’re playing soccer, not … not … waging war.”

  Steve looked at Edison. “They don’t know what it’s like, do they?”

  Edison said softly, “No.”

  Julie started, “So you two got in an argument about soccer, and …” She looked scornfully at Edison and Steve. “Don’t tell me you got in a fight over it.”

  Edison looked at Steve, who looked at Edison. They hung their heads.

  “What a couple of jerks,” said Julie.

  “It wasn’t really a fight,” said Edison.

  “It was just a sort of push … or two,” said Steve.

  “Then we fell off the wharf,” said Edison.

  “And Toby jumped in after us,” said Steve.

  “He was like a Newfoundland dog swimming to the rescue,” said Edison.

  “More like a rescue hippopotamus,” Toby put in. “Anyway, I can’t swim.”

  Edison and Steve and the girls looked at him in astonishment.

  “But … what if it had been deep?” said Steve. “Like, too deep to stand?”

  Toby shrugged. “I didn’t think of that.”

  Edison started, “Toby …” Then he couldn’t think what to say.

  Linh-Mai broke the silence. “It’s like a sauna in here.”

  “We didn’t want to end up dead of hypothermia,” Toby explained.

  “We’ll all be dead anyway if Mr. Field catches us,” said Julie. “He’ll send us home.”

  “We’d better get back to our cabin,” said Linh-Mai. “Your clothes aren’t quite dry, but they will be by morning.”

  Edison, Steve, and Toby whispered, “Thanks, girls.”

  “Where would you be without us?” said Julie as she slipped out of the door after Linh-Mai.

  10

  Long Island

  Edison woke to the sound of the twins’ excited voices outside the cabin door. He peered through the little window. Wind and rain were lashing the cabin and, across the road, sheets of spray were shooting into the air as waves thudded against the sea wall. The twins, in bright yellow raincoats, were facing the spray, laughing as it landed on their upturned faces. Julie, Amy, and Linh-Mai came out and joined them.

  Julie banged on the boys’ door and shouted, “Wake up in there.”

  “Go away,” Toby called, pulling the bedclothes over his head.

  “They have great breakfasts here,” said Jillian.

  “I’ll be right out,” said Toby, scrambling out of bed.

  The boys dressed quickly and ran to the café, where they sat with the girls.

  “What’s the special?” Toby asked.

  “Eggs and bacon …” Jessica started.

  “And sausages …” Jillian continued.

  “With beans and home fries,” Jessica finished.

  “Bring it on,” said Toby.

  Edison, listening to the roar of the wind, said, “I’ll have a piece of toast.”

  Toby had nearly finished his breakfast when a particularly fierce gust of wind shook the café, and a wall of spray slammed against it.

  Jessica said, “It’s going to be fun on the ferry.”

  Edison asked nervously, “Will it be rough?”

  “It depends what you mean by rough,” said Jillian.

  “And on the direction of the wind,” Jessica added. “If it’s blowing north–south it’s not too bad, because the ferry slices through the swell with just a backward and forward rocking motion …”

  Toby, taking a last mouthful, paused and echoed uncertainly, “Backward and forward rocking motion?”

  “… But if the wind is blowing east–west, across the boat, you get this really fun backward and forward and side to side rocking motion,” Jillian went on.

  The twins, giggling, demonstrated.

  Toby murmured weakly, “Backward and forward and side to side?”

  Edison asked, “Which way is the wind blowing?”

  The twins glanced through the window at the flag flapping wildly in front of the motel. Jillian said, “Looks like east–west.”

  Toby groaned.

  Mr. Field was consulting a list. “Those of you whose parents sent in permission slips for you to take seasickness pills, you’d better take them now.”

  Edison took the pills his mother had given him. Everyone else, except the twins and Toby, did the same.

  Toby approached Mr. Field and started, “About those pills …”

  “… You’ve changed your mind,” Mr. Field finished for him. He held out two pills. “Have you taken seasickness pills before?”

  Toby shook his head.

  Mr. Field consulted the side of the carton. “It says here side effects can be drowsiness, lack of concentration, and loss of mental and physical coordination. In other words, it can make you so you’re only half aware of what’s going on around you, and you just want to sit and stare.”

  “Like being in math class,” said Toby.

  “You can’t fool around with this stuff,” Mr. Field warned. “You never know how you’re going to react to medication. Get your friends to keep an eye on you.”

  Toby took the pills and followed the others out, while Mr. Field said quietly to Edison, “You’re not happy with how you’re playing, are you?”

  Edison shook his head. “I’ve lost my nerve.”

  “I know. Usually that means you feel under pressure, and that means you have to ask where the pressure is coming from.”

  “It’s like everyone expects me to play well all the time.”

  “Everyone?”

  “My coaches …”

  “Me?”

  “Well, no. But all my other coaches, and … and … my mother.”

  “Your mother wants what’s best for you.”

  “She wants me to go to High Park.”

  “I know. She told me before you arrived.”

  “Is that all right? Playing for Brunswick Valley so I can try out against High Park?”

  “Of course, but do you want to go to High Park?”

  Edison realized he’d never really thought about it. “I don’t know.”

  “Talk to your mother about it. Tell her you feel under pressure.”

  “Mr. Grease said to ask you about pressure.”

  “He did, eh?” Mr. Field paused before going on. “My father is Dan Field.”

  “Dan Field who used to play soccer for Canada? Your father is Dan Field?”

  “That’s what everybody says when I tell them. And when I used to play soccer — se
rious soccer — that’s who everybody expected me to be. But I’m not Dan Field. I was never as good as my dad, for a start, although it took me a while to accept that.”

  “What did you do?”

  “I gave up serious soccer.”

  “Are you saying I should give up serious soccer if I can’t handle how people expect me to play?”

  “I’m saying you have to decide why you want to play serious soccer. Is it because someone — your coaches, or your mother, or whoever — expects you to? Are you playing to fulfill someone else’s expectations? Or are you playing simply because you love soccer?”

  Edison said, “I love soccer, but …”

  “But nothing. Just enjoy the game.”

  While Mr. Grease put the van in the lineup for the ferry, the team waited on the wharf, sheltering from the pouring rain and ducking showers of spray as they watched the ferry dock. When they boarded, Toby sat on a bench at the front, facing out to sea.

  “You’ll get wet,” Edison warned.

  “Is it raining?” said Toby.

  Edison and Steve went on a tour of the boat. In the lounge, crew members were chaining tables and chairs to the floor. The twins were flying from table to table, greeting and hugging old friends. As the ferry pulled away from the wharf with a long blast on its horn, the boys raced out on deck to gaze in the direction of Long Island, although the twins had told them it wouldn’t come into sight until the ferry was clear of the rocky outcrop that guarded the mouth of the harbour. Mr. Grease was leaning on the rail, watching the wharf slip away. Edison and Steve stood on each side of him. He smiled as the ferry lurched wildly when it reached open water.

  Edison said, “Where’s Mr. Field?”

  Mr. Grease grinned and jerked his thumb over his shoulder at the window of the lounge. Edison looked in and saw Mr. Field lying on a bench, his eyes closed.

  “I think I’ll do the same,” Steve said uncertainly as the ferry lurched again.

  Edison headed for the front to check on Toby. He found him smiling happily as the bow dipped into the waves one second and reared up the next, sending sheets of spray over him.

  Edison said, “Are you okay?”

  Toby nodded, smiling blissfully.

  “Are you sure you’re not having a reaction to the seasickness pills?”