The Price of Life

by Nigel Brennan

  While I would love to speak to Nige, I put it out there that perhaps we should get Lorinda to speak to him. It’s a big sacrifice but the intel benefits are huge. We could establish if they are together and push that we are negotiating for both of them – that is, we won’t entertain separate deals. Lorinda suspects that Adan won’t let her speak to him. On confirming this is the case, she tells Adan that I’ll speak to Nigel.

  Kellie

  Newcastle

  Tuesday, 8 September

  The CMT is working well even though there have been disagreements. But the day of TC 21 we realise we’re all in this together. Lorinda and Nic are on a high: they’re going to be able to talk to Nige and Amanda. Lorinda is to go first, then Nic will call Nige.

  These calls are scheduled for before our morning CMT, so we’ll all get to hear new recordings of both Nige and Amanda. I am so excited about the prospect, I get up early to shower so that if the CMT call goes longer than normal, I can stay online and go straight to work afterwards.

  I am sitting in front of my computer, waiting; the calls with Nige and Amanda must be going for a long time. Wow, this is great, I think. Then the call pops up on the computer screen. It’s JC saying they’ve had a horror call and that Lorinda and Jon won’t be joining us today. I get Nic online and we discuss TC 21.

  Nic plays the call over Skype. Amanda is being tortured. She is screaming out to her mother, crying – no, sobbing and howling – and yelling, ‘Mummy, Mummy, Mummy,’ over and over. Lorinda is doing the most amazing job of remaining calm and sticking to the lines she’s been coached to say. JC wisely advises Nic not to make the call to Nigel. The likelihood is that it would be a similar situation with him.

  This phone call rocks me to the core, and my admiration for Nic and Lorinda shifts up a few notches. I know that it is nerve-racking for them to talk to Adan, with the threat of a bad call coming in always present, but hearing a real one changes things. It’s horrific. I play the call to Matt, and we’re both in tears. No one would wish this treatment on anyone, let alone a young woman. It really makes me wonder what else they’re doing to her.

  After this call, JC decides that we need to get things moving faster and brings in Alto, a Somali man who lives in the UK and works at a university. He will act as a translator for us. JC has used him before and he introduces us to him in our next CMT call. From now on Alto will discuss our case with Adan directly and the calls will be interpreted.

  Nigel

  The Beach House

  Saturday, 5 September

  At the start of September I go down again with a bout of dysentery – after three debilitating days of diarrhoea I’m feeling like the worst has passed, but that is nothing compared to what takes place on the night of the fifth. Amanda’s screams penetrate the bricks and mortar. The volume of her screams increases as her door opens and closes. There is no begging or pleading, just screams of terror.

  A ghostly outline of a figure passes by the archway leading back to my room. Any thoughts of bravery are quickly reduced to ashes when Mohammad appears in my doorway. His AK47 is held across his chest, his eyes are burning; it’s as though he can read my thoughts. A maniacal grin spreads across his face, which in a split second turns to a look of hatred as he brings his finger to his mouth motioning for me to be silent. Shaking with fear, I try to prepare myself for their arrival.

  Sunday, 6 September

  At morning prayer it’s utter relief to hear Amanda knocking for the toilet. Fatigue and stress have left me drained and I fall back asleep but it’s not long before I’m jolted awake by the sounds of screaming. At first it seems like a dream, then reality slaps me in the face, and I hear the groans and grunts of Amanda being gagged. Unable to listen any longer, I squeeze my hands over my ears and bury my head under the pillow, trying to force my mind to go to another place, far away from here, from this horror. I’m almost hoping they will move on to me so that Amanda will have some relief and I can share her burden. For over an hour this continues, and I’m in shock that one human being could do this to another.

  Monday, 7 September

  In the evening they again go to work on Amanda, and this time it seems even more brutal. What starts off as loud talking soon turns into muffled screaming. I hear the sound of a metal plate skipping across the concrete floor, followed by the hollow sound of a glass as it topples over. I picture Amanda desperately trying to get away but there’s nowhere to run. The screams for help seem to last for hours, and there’s constant movement of the boys going in and out of Amanda’s room. Each time the door opens her screams sound as though she is right next to me, begging me to help, begging for mercy.

  Finally there is silence. Maybe she has passed out. Then I hear the sound of the conference call, knowing that any second she will be connected to her mother.

  Her gag is removed so she can speak. The words coming out of her mouth are almost indistinguishable. She’s hysterical, trying to talk but bawling uncontrollably. ‘Mum … Mummy, please, listen, okay please,’ she wails. ‘Okay, things have changed here, Mum, you need to pay the money now, you need to pay the million dollars now because they have started to torture me. Mummy, today they have me tied up, please, please … My arms are tied to my legs behind my back and I can’t handle it, they are going to do it and I’m going to be in pain … Mummy …’ Her sobbing is like that of a young child. I hear something solid hitting flesh, and Amanda’s gasp makes me sit upright in bed. I hear something skittling across the floor.

  The telephone call finished, she’s crying and pleading with the boys. Then there’s deafening silence, except for my pulse pounding like a drum in my ears. The sound of the conference call somewhere in the distance brings me back to my senses, and Amanda is again put on the phone. ‘They have started to torture me, okay? I cannot handle this, you have to pay them money now, it cannot wait because they are going to do this to me every day and I can’t, I can’t handle it. Mum, you have to pay the money now, where is the money?’

  I can only imagine what Lorinda is going through for the second time. ‘You have half a million,’ she manages before again breaking down and weeping. ‘We need one million, we need it now because I can’t handle what they are doing to me, Mum, I can’t handle it even one more day, it hurts.’ She’s crying for mercy. ‘It’s one year, Mumma, it’s one year,’ she pleads desperately. ‘Mum, do you understand what they are doing to me?’ Amanda’s words lose sense as she becomes completely hysterical.

  For hours afterwards, I lie there, empty, too terrified to sleep.

  Nicky

  Moore Park

  Tuesday, 8 September

  As recommended by JC, we refuse to speak to Adan. We won’t reward him for such abhorrent behaviour.

  Alto the interpreter is now part of the team. He will not be involved in the decision-making process. His role is that of a communicator only; he will not answer anything outside the script. Alto is a perfect candidate because he’s been out of the country for thirty years and has no close family there. He has no clan affiliation and the origin of his accent can’t be pinpointed. JC will brief him prior to any calls, and Adan cannot contact him directly.

  JC sends him the communication charts and he comes to grips with the whole case pretty quickly.

  Sunday, 13 September

  Six long days after the hideous TC 21, Lorinda introduces Alto to Adan. TC 22 is a really, really long phone call. It is weird listening to Nigel’s life being discussed in a language completely strange to the ear – there is nothing similar, and no anglicised words used. Alto is obviously charming – he gets Adan chuckling a couple of times – and masks his true feelings well.

  He gives us a brief run-down of the conversation. Adan tried to get some idea of Alto’s background but Alto didn’t bite. He says Adan is fearful of the gang. They have fired him in the past but have since asked him back to be their spokesperson because they didn’t get anywhere without him. Adan says he spent four months talking to five Australian spies
(okay, that’s Gary, Dave, Mark, Reece – who is the fifth one?) and that these people made the situation worse. And the result of these negotiations is that they don’t believe what Lorinda is saying.

  Thursday, 17 September

  The next call of note to Adan is TC 24. Adan talks himself up to Alto and mentions a ‘mockery of period of silence when people in Nairobi thought Nigel and Amanda would be released by force or without payment’. So much for the ‘elder of much influence’, or the coked-up warlord as we know him. I’m pretty sure our complete lack of respect for this strategy upset everyone who wore a maple leaf. Adan also says, ‘The boys guarding tried to kill Amanda on a couple of occasions during this time.’

  Adan also makes a disturbing reference to a ‘loss of faith’ that soured things earlier on. That is, the first time I got to speak with Nige, way back on day ten. He implies that the original US$25K offer was meant to be the payment for supplying proof of life and they were seriously put offside by our reneging on the deal. I am in complete disorder about this. I don’t trust Adan as he tends to rewrite history. But I have a nasty sensation burning away in my gut that this could be a colossal cock-up due to the fact that the government was so steadfast in refusing to get a translator from the word go. It seems that Adan has misunderstood the Feds and thought that it really was payment for POL. Because it hasn’t been paid, he has lost face in front of the gang and we are still dealing with that a year later. It is a disquiet I can’t shake. I know I will never know the truth, but we have got pretty good at filling in the gaps.

  Sunday, 20 September

  It’s Eid, the breaking of Ramadan. That seemed to go so much faster this year than last. I offer up silent prayer – well, hopes, anyway – that they are getting something decent to eat and are being looked after in this time of celebration. I’ve read somewhere that watermelon is often eaten. If Nige gets to eat some, his memories of hot, baking summers, sitting in tractor tyre tubes in the creek, scoffing down cold watermelon and pelting the pith-sucked skins at each other will no doubt come flooding back.

  Nigel

  The Beach House

  Sunday, 20 September

  Ramadan comes to an end. I’m happy I no longer have to fast. I’ve seen a goat tethered to a tree just outside the bathroom window. Assam explains that the goat will be killed as part of the feast to celebrate Eid and tells me he will be the one given the task, as he is the most learned. I ask if it’s possible to watch, not expecting my request to be granted, so I’m surprised when he says, ‘Inshallah, I will come and get you just before I kill it.’

  I’m not sure what my motives are: whether they’re born of morbid fascination, or a chance to reconnect with something from my youth. As a boy, I butchered sheep on our farm. I sit at the back door while Assam goes about his bloody business, hacking away with a knife that’s as blunt as a spoon.

  It’s not long before the smell of roasting meat floats in the air. My empty stomach growls. Late in the morning, after the special prayer of Eid, they bring me a plate of the goat’s kidney, liver and heart. I try not to think about it and I devour everything in a matter of minutes. I’m surprised how delicious the offal tastes.

  The boys seem to be in a festive mood, each one coming in and exclaiming, ‘Eid wan axin’ before hugging me. The day turns out to be a goat fest, as plate after plate of meat is brought in. I demolish the meat before the fat turns cold. I sit there, my stomach distended, feeling content for the first time in months. Even though Eid lasts for three days, the next morning things revert to normal.

  Nicky

  Moore Park

  Monday, 21 September

  TC 25. Adan claims he heard a figure of 1.3 million from me and that Mark said we had three million available early on. Adan also says that Amanda has been working for the government and that she has been captured before. WTF? Lorinda explains to us after the call that Amanda had been ‘captured’ once before, in Iraq, but she had given them all her cash and talked her way out of it. She also suspects that Amanda thought she would be able to talk her way out of this as well. No such luck. The only thing that talks here is money. If we keep procrastinating, the price for them, Adan claims, will not go down. In fact, it will go up.

  Adan reckons there is a gentleman in Nairobi offering US$2.5 million for their release. Adan pulled this stunt earlier with Ham who told him, ‘Go crazy, mate. Take it, ’cause we are never going to be able to match that amount.’

  We all wonder why he is trying this strategy again and decide to call his bluff. If he can get that, he should take it, Alto tells him. Typical Adan; he just changes the subject. He cuts to examples of piracy and how much money is being paid for boats. Alto is already on it, breaking down the price for the vessel, underlining the fact that the price for the captives onboard is minimal.

  During the following CMT, we finally organise getting medicine into the country. My cousin has researched the medicines they might need, but he can’t write prescriptions that would be filled in Nairobi. We don’t want to jeopardise the safety of an NGO and we don’t want to ask the government – we’re not sure if they would help us anyway. JC tracks down someone in Nairobi who he thinks can get their hands on the meds and send them to Mogadishu airport.

  If they really are as unwell as Adan says, we have to get Adan to take it.

  Wednesday, 23 September

  TC 26. Lorinda, Alto and I call Adan. We take it in turns to talk to Adan then Alto translates just in case Adan hasn’t heard us correctly. We explain that I do not have $1.3 million but that we are gathering more money. Adan asks me why I didn’t call Nige. As if I would. I make it really clear to him that what happened with Amanda was not okay, and that I held him responsible. Adan is clearly getting pissed off with me. He says that he was offered three million dollars in the beginning. ‘Well, you sure missed your opportunity then,’ is my tart reply.

  Our next offer will take us over our initial budget. We discuss how we are going to put the new offer to Adan. It’s a considerable jump. With the donations we’ve been able to adjust our budget to US$610K. Every time I think about money or our lack thereof, I get that nasty, queasy feeling like I’ve lost my stomach on a show ride. Kel and I don’t know how much Canada has raised. Lorinda sounds supremely confident: ‘We don’t have it but we will have.’

  I know we don’t have enough to pay the next AKE bill; we haven’t even paid the last one. I find consolation in the fact that Kel is as apprehensive about this as I am. We’ve got a fundraiser on Saturday night and we’re both hoping this will help plug some of the holes.

  Friday, 25 September

  Adan sends a text saying that Nigel is crying for his sister. Yeah, right.

  When Alto and I next speak to Adan, we say a new offer is on the table but we want a POL. Adan wants me to speak to Nige. He can jam that request up his arse. A quick burst of adrenaline shoots through me: I don’t want to hear Nige being tortured. I want and insist on the answers being texted to Lorinda’s phone. For Lorinda, the POL is ‘What is Dad’s [Jon’s] favourite colour?’ And Nigel’s is, ‘What is Jumbo’s wife’s name?’ Jumbo is a mate of Nige’s, who he has known since he was about six.

  Adan tries to get some leverage with Alto by asking him which clan he is from. Alto has been palming this off for a while but tells Adan that he is from the Midgaan clan.

  ‘Yes, yes,’ says Adan impatiently, ‘we all belong to the Somali lower-caste Midgaan.’

  Alto chuckles when he relays this to us. He’s been gone so long he has no affiliations, and he thinks himself quite crafty. Alto’s laugh is wonderfully infectious.

  Kellie

  North Star

  Saturday, 26 September

  It’s true that your friends come through at times like this and my friends from North Star, near Goondiwindi in New South Wales, Mick and Kate Owen, are lifesavers. Kate and her friend Belinda, who also happens to be Amy’s sister-in-law, have arranged a fundraiser for Nigel in their town. Ham has organised a day of
rugby with the teams wearing the ‘Bring Blackie Back’ T-shirts, and Mick and Kate will host an auction and dinner at their home that evening.

  All of us, except Nic, head to North Star for the fundraiser. This is our old stamping ground – it’s close to where the farm was. Heather and Geoff’s friends are here, along with my friends and those of Matt, Ham, Nic and Nigel. It’s a great gathering of sixty or so people. I need to play the emotion card if this is going to be a success so I’ve put together a montage of Nigel’s life to show everyone at this event. I don’t feel bad about this – the whole thing has been a roller-coaster but it’s become so easy for us to just present the anger and frustration, not the sadness.

  I’m surprised when Ham gets choked up making a small speech about Nigel, but I shouldn’t be. I always thought Ham would be the strongest one, but as it turns out even the strongest crumble. We play the video montage of Nigel and even though I have seen it over and over, it still makes me cry, especially at the end when the screen goes black and the words ‘Nigel Brennan: kidnapped 424 days’ then the phone call with Nic and Nige kicks in. This brings the house down, the pleading in his voice, how sorry he his, and him telling everyone he loves them. There is not a dry eye. The auction raises $35 000 and lifts all our hopes that we may just have enough money to get him out without having to pay too much back at the end.

  Nigel

  The Beach House

  Saturday, 26 September

  Assam brings me my Qur’an, which I’m now sharing with Amanda. When I open the front cover, I’m surprised to see she has written a series of page numbers below those I had marked when I was trying to show Romeo the error of his ways. Amanda must have tried the same tactic.