HOT as F*CK

by Scott Hildreth

  We were halfway through our meal, and Percy couldn’t sit still. Fidgeting in his chair and having an attention span of no more than a few seconds, it seemed he was preoccupied with something.

  It wasn’t uncommon for him to act sketchy. In fact, it was quite normal. In the past, however, he acted nervous when he was telling a story, or in deep thought. It seemed his mind worked at a speed much faster than his body, and he struggled physically to keep up the pace.

  “Food’s good as fuck,” he said.

  “Thank you.”

  He took a drink of beer, set the bottle to the side, and then readjusted it. After checking its placement, he moved it again, and then scooped up another forkful of potatoes.

  “Olive oil?”

  I blinked a few times. “Excuse me?”

  “Olive oil? On the potatoes?”

  “Oh.” I smiled. “Yes. And basil.”

  He nodded. “They’re good.”

  “Thank you.”

  His eyes darted around the room as he ate, never focusing on one thing for longer than a nanosecond.

  “Are you okay?” I asked.

  “Me?” He chuckled as he looked up. “Good as gold.”

  His eyes dropped to his plate. While he poked at a small piece of chicken with his fork, the sound of a vehicle in the driveway caught my attention.

  Oddly, he seemed to not even notice.

  I stood and peered through the window. A white van was parked in the center of the driveway. “Someone just pulled in the driveway.”

  “I’ll be damned,” he said.

  He sauntered to the door and opened it.

  A man stood on the porch with a large thin package. Half as tall as he was, and the same length as the porch, it was roughly six inches thick.

  “Percy L. Welsh?” he asked.

  “The one and only,” Percy said.

  “Sign here.”

  He handed Percy something. After signing it, he exchanged it for the package.

  “Have a nice night,” the man said.

  “Thanks.”

  Percy carried it inside and leaned it against the couch. “Wasn’t expecting that.”

  I looked at the package, and then at him. “What is it?”

  “Hard saying. I’ve ordered a lot of shit in the last few weeks, and none of it has shown up yet.”

  I wondered how many three foot by six foot objects he was expecting.

  My curiosity got the best of me. “Why don’t you open it?”

  “Maybe later.”

  He walked to the table and sat down.

  It amazed me that he could go right back to eating. I really needed to know what was in the package. He, on the other hand, didn’t seem to care one way or another.

  It could have been a tabletop. Or a workbench of some sort. I wondered for a moment if it was a headboard for a bed, and then decided not, due to the width being narrower than a mattress.

  “After we eat?”

  “I’ve got a few things to get done. I’ll get to it at some point, yeah.”

  I let out a sigh and sat down. “Okay.”

  Percy’s mood had changed completely. Now eating – and acting – normally, he seemed to have dismissed whatever it was that was troubling him earlier. I, on the other hand, was overcome with interest about the delivery.

  “I think I’m done,” I said.

  He looked up from his plate. “You didn’t finish your food.”

  “I’m full.”

  He nodded. “I’m close.”

  I stared at the cardboard box while he continued to eat. After a few moments, he cleared his throat.

  “What was that chicken again?”

  I sighed. “Baked chicken.”

  “You can add it to the short list,” he said.

  I shifted my eyes to him and managed to smile. “I’ll do it.”

  “What’s on your agenda tonight?” he asked.

  “I was going to do some research, and then go to bed.”

  We carried our plates to the kitchen and cleaned up the dinner mess together. After I wiped down the countertop, I turned to face him.

  “Are you going to open it now?”

  “Maybe in a bit,” he said. “I’ve got to respond to some emails first.”

  “Baseball card business booming?”

  He grinned. “I suppose.”

  I took one last glance at the package. “I’ll be in my room.”

  “Same here.”

  “Let me know if you…when you open it.”

  “Oh. That?” He turned toward the package as if he forgot it had arrived. “Yeah. I’ll let you know. First things first, though.”

  I went to my room and began research on management practices. Fifteen minutes into my first webinar, the contents of the package no longer mattered.

  Percy’s knocking on the door startled me. I pulled one of my earbuds and set my phone aside.

  “Come in.”

  “I was mistaken,” he said. “That package wasn’t for me. It’s for you.”

  “Wait. What?”

  “It’s for you.”

  “Who’s it from?”

  “Can’t tell. Has some letters and an address. It had my name on it, but it’s not mine.”

  I rolled off the edge of the bed and tossed my phone onto the comforter. “How do you know that?”

  He shrugged. “Guess you’ll just have to see it.”

  Excited, I rushed past him and toward the living room. The package was on top of the kitchen table. Now covered with a few random pieces of cardboard and wrapped with duct tape, it was clear that Percy had opened it and then tried to rewrap it.

  I laughed. “Why didn’t you just leave it opened?”

  “Element of surprise, or whatever,” he said.

  I sat down at the table and then looked at him. “You sure it’s for me?”

  “That’s my guess.” He sat down across from me. “Damned sure not for me.”

  I took a deep breath, and then slipped my finger beneath the seam of the original brown paper packaging. After carefully peeling away the tape, I opened the package.

  A sheet of protective Styrofoam covered the object entirely. I scrunched my nose, slid it off to the side, and stared at what appeared to be the back of a very large picture.

  “It looks like a framed picture,” I said. “A big one.”

  “Looks like some dumb fucker laid it on the table upside down,” he said.

  “Help me flip it over?” I asked.

  He grabbed one side of the picture, and I grabbed the other. He tilted his head toward the hallway. “That way.”

  Together, we lifted the heavy frame and flipped it over.

  An emotional freight train plowed into me and all but bowled me over.

  I stared at the black and white photo for some time. Somehow sucked into the moment in time that the picture was taken, I drifted off completely. It took quite some time, but I eventually returned.

  Embarrassed by the tears that welled in my eyes, but aware I could do nothing to stop them from flowing, I looked up.

  I wagged my finger toward the photo. “That’s uhhm. It’s…”

  I began to cry.

  He cleared his throat. “Newsweek did a write up on Hells Angels in ’96. They were with them for almost a month, interviewing members and stuff. This was taken by their photographer on a poker run, just outside of Temecula. I uhhm. I bought the rights to it. Thought you might like it.”

  I wiped my eyes with the heel of my palm, but it did nothing to stop the tears.

  The photo, obviously taken by a professional with a high-speed lens, was captured while the MC was traveling down the highway.

  The camera’s focus was on one couple; a man and a woman on a Heritage Softail. The man’s right hand was draped over his ape hanger handlebars. His left arm was extended straight, directly toward the lens of the camera.

  With his eyes fixed on the photographer, his contempt was made clear by position of his upright middle fi
nger.

  The woman’s left hand rested on the man’s hip. Her right arm was resting atop her very pregnant stomach.

  The look on her face was one of sheer content.

  “It’s uhhm.” I pressed my hand against the glass. “It’s the three of us.”

  Percy walked around the edge of the table, draped his arm over my shoulder, and pulled me into him.

  My quest for answers was over. Everything I’d been searching for was in the photograph. I rested my head against Percy’s shoulder, tilted my head toward the picture, and stared into the eyes of my defiant father.

  I love you, Dad.

  I had no idea how long we stood there, but I enjoyed every moment of it. At some point, Percy released my shoulder and stepped in front of me.

  Still in somewhat of a trance, I gazed blankly at him as he extended his arm between us.

  He raised his hand to my chin. I lifted it slightly in response. The space between us vanished. I sucked in a choppy breath.

  Our lips merged.

  My eyes fell closed. The kiss was completely unexpected. Nonetheless, I draped my arms over his shoulders and kissed him in return, cherishing every element of the intimate moment we shared.

  My mother had explained how my father’s kisses took her to a place that was not of this earth. Although I’d been kissed in the past, I’d never experienced what she spoke of. At least, not until that moment when Percy kissed me.

  Our lips parted. I slowly descended back to earth.

  My eyes opened.

  He traced along the outline of my jaw with his index finger. “I think I’m done.”

  “Done what?” I breathed.

  “Done searching.”

  That makes two of us.

  Chapter One Hundred Eighty-Four

  P-Nut

  It was the day after I had kissed Joey. It wasn’t something I’d planned, and although it seemed natural, the flood of emotion that followed wasn’t something I was used to.

  Somehow, thoughts of her now consumed me. I wanted to touch her, kiss her again, hold her, and feel her body against mine.

  Everything I wanted to do with her was contrary to what I’d done in the past with other women. Not only was it different, it was the complete opposite. Convinced she had peeled back a layer of my being and exposed a part of me I had no idea existed, I was eager and afraid at the same time.

  I carried my mother’s lunch to the living room and placed it on the tray. “Time for lunch.”

  “I’m afraid the Italian guy is a liar. He said he was in the Navy when that poor girl got pregnant. But he’s got another son that was born at the same time. It just doesn’t add up,” she said.

  “Maybe he’s confused.”

  “Men don’t get confused,” she said, keeping her focus on the television. “They make up excuses when they don’t want to admit things.”

  “Do they really?”

  “They sure do.”

  I sat down across from her and let out a sigh. “Where did dad take you on your first date?”

  “To the park.” She looked at me. “The one with the rollercoaster. By the beach.”

  “Belmont Park?”

  “That’s the one.” She smiled. “We got ice cream, and he took me on the rollercoaster. Scared me to death. I hated that thing so much we rode it until I liked it.”

  “How old were you?”

  “It was 1959. I was sixteen. You can see the beach from the top of it, you know.”

  The park had been an attraction at Mission Beach for nearly a century, and the rollercoaster she spoke of was now a national monument. Restored, and still operational, the wooden coaster drew spectators and riders from all over the world.

  Despite its popularity, I’d never ridden it.

  “The sun sets on that beach. I watched it many a time from the top of that rollercoaster,” she said. “We lived in Point Loma. Our house wasn’t much bigger than this living room. We could get there in ten minutes.”

  “Of all the places dad took you, which place was your favorite?” I asked.

  She picked up one half of the sandwich. “For a date?”

  “Yeah. On a date.”

  She dipped the corner into her soup and held it in place. “The park.”

  “Why?”

  “There’s a little boy or girl within us all, Percy. Finding a way to release that child is the secret to living a life of happiness. That rollercoaster – and your father – were my secret.”

  “How’d you know he was the one?”

  “I just told you.”

  She lifted the sandwich and took a bite. “Grilled cheese and tomato soup. My favorite.”

  “I met someone,” I said.

  “A girl?”

  “She’s really nice.”

  “Are you ready for that?” she asked. “To give it another try?”

  “I think so.”

  “I just hope that she--”

  “It’ll be fine, ma.”

  “You sure you’re ready?”

  “There’s only one way to find out.”

  She took another bite of the sandwich and then looked at me. “Take her to the rollercoaster. If she makes you feel young – and if she offers you a bite of her ice cream – I want to meet her.”

  I smiled. “I’ll do that.”

  “Now hush,” she said. “Lauren’s back on.”

  Chapter One Hundred Eighty-Five

  Joey

  He pulled the motorcycle into the parking lot, circled it once, and then came to a stop in a spot designated for motorcycles.

  With my eyes fixed on the rollercoaster, I climbed off and removed my helmet. “Are we going to ride it? The rollercoaster?”

  “Rumor has it you can see the horizon from the top of it,” he said. “Sun’s going to set in a bit. Thought it might be cool to see it from up there.”

  I gazed at the massive structure. The string of cars crept to the top of the first hill. The riders anticipated what was next, proven by the sight of their hands shooting up into the air. After reaching the crest, the cars shot down the other side.

  The evening air filled with their screams.

  “It’d be awesome,” I said.

  He stepped to my right and extended his left elbow. “Come on.”

  I slipped my arm through his and walked at his side as I took in the sights. A boardwalk separated the beach from the amusement park. Other than the rollercoaster, old-school rides like bumper cars, a tilt-a-whirl, and a carousel were within my view, and a several other rides were positioned at the other end of the park.

  The excitement of riding a rollercoaster with Percy filled me. It seemed like an odd choice for a first date with a biker, but I loved the idea. The thought of it turned my legs to rubber.

  We stepped onto the platform, behind several others in line waiting for the ride. I counted the people, then counted the cars as they crept up the last hill. I grinned at the thought of us getting on the next ride.

  When the ride stopped, my heart began to race.

  “Have you ever been one of these?” he asked.

  “Not yet.”

  “Me neither. We’re both virgins, I guess.”

  “I suppose so.”

  The people were smiling and laughing as they got off the ride, all seemingly happy with what the rollercoaster offered them. Then, the cars inched forward, coming to a stop directly in front of us.

  Percy paid, and we climbed into one of the small cars. After securing ourselves inside, I held my breath and waited.

  The cars crept forward.

  I glanced at Percy, and then at the upcoming hill. Slowly, we climbed, inch by inch, until we were near the top of the first hill.

  He raised his hands in the air. “Come on.”

  I did the same.

  We reached the top, paused, and then shot down the hill like a rocket.

  With our hands over our heads, we both screamed. Before I could catch my breath, we’d reached the next hill.

&nbs
p; Down we went. My heart rose into my throat. A joyous shout escaped me, but was promptly swallowed as we cascaded down the next hill.

  The cars shot to the left, tossing us into one another. As it crept up another long hill, we shared a look.

  He leaned forward and kissed me softly. It wasn’t a long kiss. It was simply a peck on the lips. At that moment, however, it took my breath away.

  The car careened down the hill, and we eventually came to a stop right back where we started.

  “Holy cow,” I said. “That was a blast.”

  “Want to go again?”

  “Can we?”

  “Let’s go until the sun sets.”

  I pumped my fist. “Yes!”

  We rode the rollercoaster until sunset, catching bits and pieces of the orange sky as we were able. After a dozen rides, the colorful horizon melted into the sea of blue beneath.

  And then, when it grew dark, we got off what would be our last ride of the night.

  “Jesus fuck,” Percy said. “I’ve never had so much fucking fun in my life.”

  “Me neither,” I said.

  With his hands pressed to his knees, he heaved to catch his breath. “That was fun.”

  “The most fun, ever.”

  “Do you like ice cream?”

  I scrunched my nose. “Who doesn’t like ice cream? Heck yes, I like ice cream.”

  He peered toward the shops that lined the boardwalk. “Come on.”

  With my arm wrapped around his, we walked side by side to a building with the name Sweet Shoppe carved into a wooden sign.

  “This must be the place,” he said.

  I gazed through the glass at the display of candies, fudge, and ice cream. “Ever been here before?”

  “Nope.”

  “Ice cream virgin, too. Huh?”

  “I’ve had it before,” he said with a laugh. “Just been a long time.”

  I tried to think of the last time I had ice cream, and came up with nothing. “Yeah. A long time for me, too.”

  We each ordered a two-scoop cone, and when they came, we gasped. The waffle cones were monstrous, and the dips of ice cream were so big I doubted we could ever finish them.